Am a bit of a wrinkly now (i was 24 on 4/9/05, but I had the best birthday I've ever had in my whole entire life!!!) but I know an awful of stuff about an awful lot of stuff!
I am COMPLETELY NON-JUDGEMENTAL and you can always inbox me with stuff you wouldn't ask anyone else @ MelanieHarvey81@Hotmail.Com
Mel xxx
"Dance like no one is watching and love like you've never been hurt"
E-mail: MelanieHarvey81@Hotmail.Com
Gender: Female
Location: Long story, born in Germany, Parents are Spanish but grew up in the UK!!!
Occupation: General Superstar and all around heroine!
Age: 24
Member Since: December 24, 2004
Answers: 356
Last Update: July 20, 2007
Visitors: 25972
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i need a cute way to word i love you and think your the most amazing person ever to my boyfriend as if i were going to write him a letter..kinda like in a paragraph or so..im not really good at these things but i just really have to tell him..this is strange i know but whatever. im just stuck and lost for words!..thanks!:) (link)
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Lol!
My boyfriend nearly drove me mad by putting "831" at the end of each text message/SMS or sticking it to the milk carton in my fridge, or putting it on a post-it note in my shoe, or as a background to every e-Mail he wrote to me.
He wouldn't tell me what the 831 meant and I spent ages wracking my brains beofer he told me....
8 (8 little letters)
3 (3 little words)
1 (1 huge meaning)
Obviously it is I L-O-V-E Y-O-U
Except it took me ages to figure it out!!
Mel
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hey guys. I am 14f, a freshman in high school, and my bf is 15m and a freshman in high school. he is alsmo 16 and i am almost 15. Well, we have been together for about 3 months. I like him alot. For Christmas he got me this necklace and I got him a stuffed animal (a snow tiger because he said it was his favorite..but i accidently thought leoperds were the same thing hehe. but that is another story). So anyways I wanted to know what you guys think I should get him for valentines day. i really dont want to get him another stuffed animal..cause that will be old. do you think he will like jewlery? i dont know if that is appropiate for a guy. i really dont know how to burn cds, so that is out of the questions, and i dont like to take pictures. hehe so does anybody have any ideas? thanks! (link)
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Hiya,
Does he support any particular sports team or have a favourite band?
If so then get him something to do with one of those!
You could also make him an edible card! You can make them with sheets of rice paper, love heart sweets, liquorice laces - anything you can think of really!! To stick things on to rice paper you can use that writing icing stuff!
Hope you have a really good valentines day together!
Mel
xxx
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One of my close male friends and I email each other. We are just friends, but he sent me an email that made me think that he may like me more. Well I told him in an email that I got 8 inches cut off my hair, and that is was really short now.
He sent me an email back and said " I can hardly WAIT to see your new look, and now you can show off you sexy neck".
Do you think this means he likes me more than a friends? (link)
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Hiya,
My guy friends pay me compliments all the time!
It's just a really nice comment that's all, although if he begins to do it more often then there is a chance he might like you in that way!
Best thing to do is just ask him, especially if you like him "that way" too. If not then you'll just have to wait and see!!
Take care!
Mel
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What goes lace hands,mean?
Like does it usually mean something? (link)
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Hiya!
I have never heard of the term "lace hands" before!
If you find out what it means let me know!
Mel xx
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Hi, I would REALLY apprecaite some advice :) OK, my partner (male 32) is driving me (female 26) up the wall! We have a 6 month old baby. My parner works, I am at home alone with the baby all day. He has this really annoying habit where he get's home, sits on his lap top and then only goes to bed at about 5am! His alarm goes off at least 6 times before he gets up for work (obviously making him late!) and then he has to stay at work late to make up the time. By the the time he gets home from work, I am so wound up that we argue! I have tried to comprimise by designating "laptop evenings" but when we do this, it lasts for a few days and then we are back at square one. The worst of it is, that he he has difficulty with "demands". He sees everything as a demand and then feels that he must rebel! This makes him worse. Please can you give me some practical advice to get him to sleep earleir and to wake up on time for work. We are due to get married in Jan and I feel that this is a real reason for me to call it all off :( Thanks :) (link)
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Hi there,
Ah... men, you can't live with em, you can't shoot em either! Lol!
If I were you I would try talking to him again and explain that you are thinking about calling the marriage off.
If he asks why (which he will - if he doesn't you shouldn't be marrying him anyway!) then tell him that you feel like you come second to his laptop.
Explain that you don't sit around all day doing nothing you are looking after your home and the baby! Maybe on his day off you could swap roles so he sees just how much you actually have to do - and you can sit there and play on the laptop all day!
I too have been a computer widow! It's not fun and if all else fails then the only thing I found that worked was to steal the cables that made it work - naturally it caused the mother of all arguments but in the end we managed to come to a compromise.
I'm sure if you BOTH want your relationship to work then you will sort something.
Another thing I would suggest is getting involved in a mother and baby group - this would give you some outside activity away from your home. It'll also be a place for you to socialise with others in your situation and it'll be good for your baby too!
If you need a chat or just to vent some frustration then drop me and e-Mail sometime!
MelanieHarvey81@hotmail.com
Take Care
Mel xxx
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I've known this guy since I was three and we have been dating since I was 15. we are totally in love. but, we havent had sex yet and I'm 21!!! Is there something wrong with me? (link)
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Hiya,
There is absolutely nothing wrong with that at all!
Just because you have been together a long time and are in love doesn't mean you HAVE to have sex!
If you feel ready to take that next step in your relationship then discuss things with your partner and see what he thinks.
Don't feel pressurised to have sex just because everyone else is. I think you are really lucky, you are with a man you love who loves you - you obviously trust him so I'm sure that your first time together - whenever it is - will be something far more memorable and special than a lot of girls who come on this site!
Just take things in your own time! No one ever said "At the age of 21 you are no longer allowed ot be a virgin!" Ths goes for your guy too.
Do it when you are both comfortable to, don't do it because you feel you must!
Take Care!
Mel xxx
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I have a 4 yr old son with a guy that I am still trying to let go of. He has a girlfriend which I am still trying to accept. The hardest part is that he is constantly around to visit his son. When he comes around she calls his phones, he has come up here with hickeys on his neck. I have really tried to ignore it all despite how much it hurts. But 2 days ago I had enough and just stop speaking to him. I am still not speaking to him. I know it is childish but I don't know how else to handle it. He is no longer my boyfriend so he has the right, but what else can I do to make it stop hurting? How can I maintain a healthy friendship without letting my jealousy get in the way? (link)
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Hiya,
Seems like a really tough situation to handle!
You should call him and ask him to come and see you on his own, without your son their - tell him that you need to discuss something with him.
If and when he does turn up ask him to switch his phone off and listen to what you have to say.
Tell him how you feel and that you still haven't fully gotten over the relationship you shared and that it makes it hard for you when he constantly flaunts it in your face that he is with someone else. Make it clear that you aren't trying to ruin his new relationship but you'd rather that when he came to spend time with your son that it is THEIR time and he needs to explain that to her. That he has a little person to think of and he can't possibly give him all the attention that he needs when she is constantly calling.
As for the hickeys - short of telling him not to let her do it there is not much you can do about that one.... like you said he has every right to be in a relationship and hey if he's chosen someone with vacuum-mouth then that's up to him! It's a cheap look anyway! LOL!
The best thing you can do is put all of your energy into loving your son and you will get the best reward ever. I know it's really hard sometimes especially when they insist on rubbing your nose in it but try and let it go over your head and just focus on your little boy.
If you need to chat inbox me or e-Mail me at melanieharvey81@hotmail.com
Take care and keep your spirits up.
Mel xxx
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Why do girls help a guy cheat on his current girlfriend, then date him after they break up? They've already proven that this guy is totally willing to cheat, so do they actually think he wont do the same to them? Are girls really that stupid? (link)
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Fraid so!
Some girls just can't help it. It may be cos they still love him, it may be because they want to ruin his current relationship and then get revenge by doing o him what he did to her. It could be for one of 1,000 reasons, but either way you look at it, you shouldn't give someone that's hurt you once a chance to do it a second time!
Mel xx
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Well christmas is coming up and i think i know what im doing for my Girlfriend, if you have read my past questions, i'm doing this thing, i get a vase with 11 roses in it, and one glass rose in it. And a card on it that says "when the last rose dies is when i will stop loving you" Hence... a glass rose wont die. Then besides that im gonna do one of those build-a-bear things.. and a silver neckless. Sound good? anyone know a good place to get a silver neckless? like a heart emblem of what ever? (link)
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Hi there,
You have a REALLY lucky girlfriend!!!
Depending on your budget you could get her a Tiffany necklace. I have one and they are definitely a big hit with girls!
Take care, nice to see there are still some true romantics out there!
Mel xx
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The guy that I'm seeing is a real pig. He has a beer guy because he'll go out drinking all the time with his friends and down 12 beers. He farts all the time and has bad breath and body odor. He has red veigns on his nose from all his drinking. Also he dresses like he's thin, he'll wear tight jeans and t shirts but it looks ridicuous because he's about 30 pounds overweight.
It's really hard for me to get turned on by him. It's not just the way he looks sometimes he can be a real jerk. The last straw was when I phoned him on his cell on he told me to only phone him if it was after 6.
I want to dump him but I don't know how to go about it. Should I tell him that his appearance turns me off or would that be too mean? (link)
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Hiya,
It doesn't sound like it just his appearance that bugs you. It sounds like everything about him irritates you.
I would get out of there! You don't have to give him a reason for wanting to end it, just explain that you don't feel the same about him anymore and don't want to continue seeing him anymore.
Then get yourself out there and find a bloke who does treat you right and looks good with it!!
Good Luck!
Mel xx
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I'm M/13 and During the summer I met this beutiful girl with a great personality. I asked her out but she wan't allowed to date, yet I got her phone number and I've called her a couple times, but I'm not sure she feels alot of me. I realy care about her. Her name and face are constantly running through my mind. She my first thought when I wake up, the last thought before I go to sleep, and she's the only reason I wake up in the morning. I asked her out again to home coming but she said she wasn't going. We are both very social, but when we're around each other we don't talk much. Yet we talk forever over the phone. Our seats were seperated in the only class we have together!!!!! I hate my 7th period teacher!!!!!!!! I have had alot of girl trouble in my past and I'm scared she doesn't feel the same way, because over the phone she said we were just friends after someone spread a rumor about us. I've waited all my life for her, and i don't want to drive her off. I love this girl, but can I ever be her bf.... I don't know If she feels for me. (link)
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Hiya,
You sound like a real sweetie! Girls can be such b!tches sometimes!!
I think the only thing you can do is play the waiting game, until she is ready to take things further. Stay friends with her and be there for he if she needs you but don't smother her otherwise you are likely to push her further away.
Take Care and good luck - remember you are only 13 and there are plenty more girls out there, so even if this girl decides that she'll never go out with you don't worry because there are plenty more fish in the sea. (And in my opinion the girl that gets you is gonna be one lucky girl!)
Take Care
Melanie xx
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ok this is long yall but stick with me and i'll rate high. anyway im f/17 and ive been talkin to this guy whose 18. we go to the same school and we kind of started talking about 2 weeks ago. and he seemed like the perfect guy, literally, there was nothing wrong with him. but then he started hearing rumors about me that were so untrue about how im like a slut and stuff. and i told him that he just had to believe me when i say that they are not true because theres nothing else i can say or do to prove that they are not true. and he believed me. it took a little while to get past all of it but we finally did. the thing is though, were not boyfriend and girlfriend, we've just been kind of getting to know eachother in more ways than one. but then today i hear that the whole time that we've been talking, he has a girlfriend! and i was soooo upset at first! and when i went up to him and started yelling at him he told me that it wasnt true. he said theyve been best friends for a long time and stuff but they dont think of each other like that. and i was like "so if i ask her she'll tell me no yall arnt going out?" and he said yes. and then he said youre going to have to believe me like how i believe you. so should i? do ya'll think hes telling the truth? i dont know if i should trust him and give him another chance...please help! (link)
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Hey there,
I think you should give him the chance - after all he gave you one!
He seems like a nice guy. If you are really worried about the relationship between them then why don't you suggest that you all go out for pizza/ a movie or something. He would definitely say NO if she was anything more than a platonic friend and it'll give you a chance to suss her out - you never know you might even end up liking her!
Take Care!
Mel xx
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I am a 19 year old female who has dated a lot of immature 18-21 year olds. I joined an online dating site recently, just because I thought it would be fun. Well, now I seem to be drawing myself towards older men, such as 30 year olds. I suppose it's because of their maturity level, financial stability, and experience.
Would this be socially acceptable for me to have a relationship with a 30 year old, or a bit taboo? How would others perceive us? What should I consider before dating an older man? What sort of problems may we encounter in our relationship? Any thoughts would be appreciated. (link)
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Hi there,
If you love someone (and you have used this dating site to find someone you could possibly fall in love with) then it doesn't matter what anyone thinks about your ages, race, religion as long as you are both happy with it.
In this day and ages there is nothing really anymore that is socially unacceptable when it comes to dating so get out there and don't worry about what other people think! If we all worried about what everyone else thought then no one would get anywhere!!! :o)
Mel
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When my husband and I were first married, he promised me that if we ever had children, he would get out of the army. Two children later, he still hasn't gotten out.
The army has ended up being his life. He loves his job and has informed me that he is never getting out. He feels like his country needs him. I think this is very selfish of him to break his promise to me. The children barely know who their own father is. I feel like a single mother.
While he was in Iraq the second time, I wrote him a letter telling him I couldn't take it anymore and I was filing for divorce. I told him when he got back that I did not mean what I had said and that I was just going through a hard time with the pregnancy. Now three months after the birth of our second child, he is going back to Iraq.
I really do not want to leave this man. I love him dearly; he is my husband and the father of my children. My parents went through a divorce when I was a little girl, so I know how traumatic it is for a child.
It's hard for me to fight with him over this. The precious time he is here, I do not want to fight with him and bring up this issue. I want us to be happy with our time together and act like a family when he is here. I do not want him leaving to go to Iraq thinking that his wife might leave him. But sometimes, I feel like this relationship is just too difficult to take anymore.
What should I do? How do I cope with this? (link)
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Wow, I take my hat off to you for the devotion you show to your husband.
My mother was a military wife too and my Dad used to go away for long undefined periods of time,
I asked her how she coped and she honestly couldn't give me an answer.
Your husband obviously loves his career although I doubt in his deepest heart of hearts he loves it more than he loves you and his children.
If I were you then I would write him another letter and explain that although you are proud of him for the service that he is doing for his country that you and the children miss him and you want him home.
How is your relationship when he is home? Do you get on O.K?
I am not really sure I can offer you anymore advice than this as I feel like I am way out of my depth with this one. It's a tough decision you have to make but I think you have already made it - you love your husband and don't want a divorce, so you have to hang in there in the hope that he will change his mind in the future.
I REALLY hoe that things work out for you and if you are ever in need a chat to vent some frustration or whatever then feel free to e-Mail me at MelanieHarvey81@hotmail.com
Take good care
Melanie x
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me and my boyfriend have been argueing and everytime we argue he says really hurtful things for fuck off is one of them, what should i do? (link)
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Hiya,
If I were you the best thing to do when in the middle of an argument and he says "Fuck Off" is walk away.
If someone says something like that to you then my guess is that they are really angry and you won't get anything resolved between the 2 of you while one or both of you are angry or upset.
If he asks where you are going when you walk away then calmly say to him that you don't want to speak to him while he is in this frame of mind and tell him to give you a call or text when he's calmed down.
This way it gives him time to think about what he's done and that he's upset you and the majority of the time he'll apologise!
Take care and let me know how it goes!
Mel xx
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theres a guy that I really like. We havent slept together yet but I was hoping that one day we could be more than friends. Anyways I just found out from one of his friends that he spent a year in jail when he was 18, but wouldnt tell me what for. Anyways, that was a long time ago, he is in his 40's now.
He is a really nice guy and I know he would never hurt me. But I'm really curious as to why he was in jail.
Should I ask him or wait for him to tell me? (link)
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Hi there,
It depends how much it it bugging you not knowing.
If it was only a year he was in jail for then chances are it is nothing serious.
If I were you I'd be inclined not to believe it unless the details came straight from the horses mouth.
I've been in situations before where I have listened to details given to me by outside influences and lost someone really special because of it.
If he thinks it is something serious then I'm sure he will tell you in his own time, I wouldn't push it though as it is obviously not something he is proud of and if he's not been back to jail then chances are he has changed his ways!
Tc
Mel xx
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I was asked out to lunch with a guy that I'm just friends with (but have suspected that he has deeper feelings for me).
After we ordered he started to ask me all sorts of questions, like where was I going to find the guy of my dreams, and that prince charming wasnt going to knock on my door. Then he told me that he was worried that if I wasnt in a relationship by 5 years time ( I am 27 ) that I wouldnt be very happy.
The whole time the conversation took place he looking at me romantically, and after I finished eating, I applied a fresh coat of lipstick and he couldnt keep his eyes off me.
When we left it was pouring rain and he took his umbrella and covered me even though he was soaked, and walked REALLY close to me.
He has always been shy and would never say he wanted to be more then friends upfront. Do you think this was his way of telling me he wants to be my boyfriend? (link)
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OMG!!! If that isn't a green light sign that he likes you I don't know what is!!
Especially if he is shy, it was probably a way of asking you without doing it directly as he is probably scared of rejection!
I would invite him out to lunch and try and broach the subject again, if you like him, (and I have a funny feeling you do!!) and see how it goes!!
Good luck!!
Mel xx
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I really like this older guy and he likes me. The age difference is quite big, he's in his mid 40's and I am 27.
We both like each other and have been on a couple of dates, but I'm worried about other people;s reaction to us.
For example, we had many raised eyebrows when we went out to a restaurant together. Someone asked me if he was my father!!
Also other friends of mine that have met him don't find him attractive and don't know what I see in him. I've always gone for guys with nice personalities than good looking guys who were jerks. So what if he's a little overweight and going grey?
He treats me well and I feel like I can talk to him about anything.
What should I say to everyone who is trying to break us up? (link)
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Hi there!
First of all I'd like to say congratulations on finding someone you are happy with!!
Do not listen to what these so called "friends" and others say - it is your decidion and if they were true friends they would be happy for you whether he's 40 or 140!
You should try (I know it's hard) and ignore them and if they persist, despite seeing you so happy, then firmly tell them that it is none of their business and that by making these comments that they are upsetting you!
Stay happy and don't listen or take any notice of what Joe Public thinks, it's your life - not theirs!
Mel xx
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Ok so i have a friend Maria and i have a crush Adam. I have liked Adam for so long and one day Adam telles my bestfriend Maria that he likes her. I am totally emotianal. What should i do? I need serious advice on this one.
~Andrea~ (link)
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Ah,
This is a hard one.
The best thing you can do is tell your mate how you feel - cos good mates lars a lot longer than boyfriends.
Other than than I can't really sat what to do.
It happenef to me when I was 13-14 and I was gutted thar rhis guy Chris liked my mate more than me, but I tld her how I felt and it all worked out.
There a very good saying "Lo que sra sera" Whatever will be will be, and everything happens for a reason honey.
Whatever happens make sure you don't lose a friendship over a boy - honetly in my experience - it's never worth it.
Mel
xxxxx
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if a boy asks you if you have started your period and you answer yeh and the boys says real loud YES what does that mean? (link)
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It means he is a boy still! Not a young man!!!
Don't worry about it, he probably doesn;t even know what a period is!!!
It's part of growing into a woman for us girlies!!! Unfortunately it doesn't work the same way for guys!!!!
Their brain will catch up though - promise........... it's normally when they are about 40!! LOL!!
Take care
Mel
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