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Q: My husband is 29, his sister is my age 21. They have, in my opinion, the most inappropriate relationship ever. She'll come and just sit in his lap and cuddle up with him. Or if shes sitting on the couch he will sorta attack her in a huge bear hug and end up on top of her. Once he was eating dessert and she came and sat on his lap and he started to feed her from his dessert. He didn't even think to offer me until after she had already eaten from his spoon. I don't know what all of you think, but I find this utterly disgusting...its weird, gross, and just plain wrong!

I talked to him about it, and he felt that I was being ridiculous and said that I have intimacy issues because in my family we are not all over each other. yaa we give hugs and stuff..but wrestling with each other on the couch and sitting on laps, and feeding each other...thats just weird. He was like, she is my sister! I told him, "EXACTLY! she's your sister...thats why I have such a problem with this". I even told him that I dont want her sitting on his lap any more..shes not a small child and its not cute when she comes and sits on his lap. He had the nerve to tell me he'll think about it...not okay I understand this is bothering you and I'll stop... he's just going to think about it. How wonderful..

I know no one can really do anything about this, but I guess I just need to see what others think about this. Is it just me or is it weird for siblings to treat each other the same way they would treat their significant others; minus the kissing on the lips and sex?

All answers are welcome and much appreciated. :)

I also find his behavior to be going quite a bit too far. This sort of relationship is not common among siblings of the opposite sex- I mean, if they were younger ( a lot younger), then you could argue that they just like to play around. But he is 29, she is 21. Way too old for child's play, if you ask me. However, I can understand that what may seem strange to others is perfectly normal for them. Still, you have a right to ask about and even condemn this. You can tell him that it makes you feel uncomfortable, and that you would appreciate it if they would stop acting that way when you are around. Oh, and about his comment about your family: a) he has no right to criticize your upbringing, and b) there is clearly nothing abnormal about your family; I would say that he and his sister are too close- beyond the norm. Unfortunately, it seems that the only thing you can do is tell him to stop doing things like that when you are around. You might even consider asking him exactly why they find that sort of behavior to be okay- maybe try to get his perspective without sounding judgmental (although I can totally see why you feel weird about this). Good luck!

Rating: 5

Thanks, the thing is I did try to understand, and his explanation was that in his family hugs are the simplest and least thing you can do to express love. so they go beyond hugs...that does not help me feel any less uncomfortable with the situation though.

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I am here to give honest advice, when I feel I have something to contribute. I try to be as empathetic and understanding as I can, as I know that the way something is said is as important as the message itself.

I usually advise on love/relationships, friendship and family issues, nutrition, and health (mental and physical). If I feel I can help out, there's not a whole lot I am unwilling to answer. Ask away!