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I am a 29/f that loves to listen and try to help out. I have always been the one people go to for advice.

I will tell you how I feel about it. If you don't like my answer, I'm sorry. However, usually what I say is true, people just can't handle the truth.

advice

Ok, so here's my situation. One of my friends and I have been fooling around for a while now (about 5 months now). She's fully able to have sex and all that, but the problem is that she wont relax enough or let herself go enough to actually have an orgasm. She's been like this all her life. I can get her close, but when it starts to get too close I guess she realizes the situation and either A) loses the feeling, or if she's really close B) Pulls off me. It's not intentional that she does this, her body just convulses because of the shock and ends up with no climax. So far we've tried a few things. I'm getting her to do kegal excersizes, and we've gotten muscle relaxants (the muscle relaxants actually worked really well considering she had her period at the time, but her legs gave out and she fell down >_>). Anyways, any advice would be appreciated. I'm starting to run out of ideas and I know that the longer it takes for her to have an orgasm the harder it gets overall for her to actually have one. Plus I just feel bad when she doesn't get to finish.

I will say as a person that takes relaxant type medicine for fibromyalgia, orgasms are harder to obtain. So, I would not suggest that one.

Considering I do not know all the techniques you have tried, it will be hard to give suggestions. It may be that she is embarassed to have an orgasm in front of someone. She could have had an experience during an orgasm before that has left her terrified of having one again. Of course, in that situation, I am not so sure that talking about it is the right thing to do. If you bring it up, it could make her more uncomfortable. So, unless she brings it up, I wouldn't say anything to her.

Ask her if she has ever had one before. Then, I would say that try to get her to have one without actually having sex. When she gets to the brink and tries to back away, tell her that everything is okay and to relax. Reassurance could be the key aspect here.

I'm gonna say that toys are a girls best friend in times like this. Try buying something at a "toy shop" and introduce them to her. Who knows, once you open her up and get her to final have a release, you may never stop her again!!

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(Rating: 5) I find that odd because on the muscle relaxants she almost had one. Maybe it's just different for the individual. We're both pretty sure that it's a mental thing since she's never been able to have one. She was sexually assulted when she was younger which is probably the cause of it but we're trying to find ways to get her past it. So far she's used toys but they haven't worked for her. Hopefully something will eventually work though.
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