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I'm an 29 year old guy.I'll always do my best to give well considered and sincere advice - give me your best shot. P.S. Don't be afraid to ask me private questions, I rarely spend a lot of time answering non-private questions.
o.o There is apparently a FORUM for me if you would like to talk about random non-advice stuff. Take off your shoes!
advice
Hi, I'm 14, soon to be 15 in 13 days, female.
My family has recently become poor. I've never been a person to shop at Hollister or anywhere that expensive, buttt, according to my mom and dad, we're almost in debt, and we can't pay our monthly bills. We can't afford my school clothes, so I'm having a yard sale.
My dad, tonight, just told me that we might not have enough to send me to Drivers Ed this September. I got really upset, and he still has to look into the finances.
I told him I was angry because we were poor, and he said whatever and left. What do I do about all of this? I think I hurt my dad's feelings, and yet I'm literally crying because we don't have enough money for anything anymore, I can't stop crying.
... please help. What should I do? My birthday will probably be the worst ever.
Hey
Sorry to hear you're not doing so well. How did your family become poor? Did one of your parents lose a job? Maybe they'll find another one soon...
xoLoLaox had a good point about driver's ed. It's probably the least of your worries right at the moment. Get someone in your family to teach you how to drive.
I can understand being "upset" because you're poor. Being "angry" is not acceptable, because in order to be angry, you must be directing hate towards somebody/something. What made your family poor? It wasn't somebody coming along and making sure you had no money on purpose, was it? So when you tell your father you're angry because you're poor, he probably takes that to mean that you blame him. That's not fair, so perhaps you should check to see that he knows you still love him, and that you're just upset. Right now, your dad is probably more upset than you.
Sally's suggestion of getting a job is a good idea. Also, if you are going to school, it's possible that your school has a program for students with financial difficulties (Like scholarships for financial stress, so that you wouldn't have to work while you study)
As long as your family has the money for basic things like electricity, heating, water, and food, then you'll be alright. Sometimes you don't really realise or appreciate that those sorts of essentials are there, until you lose them. There are people who are a lot worse off than you at the moment. That doesn't make it easier, I guess, but it's something you have to realise. You're not completely out of everything.
If I may say, Brie's answer was a little bit much like Sally's (i.e. what a rip-off Brie!)
xoLoLaox's point again, is very good. You should try to focus on the people you have. They're the best thing you have going for you, trying to get through a hard time. While you have friends, and a family that loves you, your birthday can be fine. You won't necessarily get many expensive presents, but what was there that you were going to get that is so important that it matters more than you? Is not having heaps of presents going to make you unhappy - or would it just be that you make yourself unhappy by not accepting that you can't have them just yet? Happiness is what you decide.
I hope that wasn't too crap and philosophical for you :) And you're happy that at least 3 people who answered you care enough to want to help you.
And I hope things go better and you feel happier soon.
-K
(Rating: 5) Thanks, and I have no idea why we're poor. My mom doesn't work, never did, and recently broke her foot so maybe medical bills are not going good. My dad I think is getting pay cuts. He told me a few weeks ago that he took the pager just so I could do Drivers Ed and I appreciated it and then he told me he doesn't know anymore. I got angry for no reason, and I felt extremely bad. Expensive gifts dont matter to me at my birthday, what I meant was like if I can have friends even over or not because I don't know if my dad can afford like food, and he usually buys movies on demand, and all of this extra stuff we don't need.
And if a parent teaches me to drive at home, do I still have to take drivers ed?