About lucretia
I have been on this site a little while now, and while I have never been one of its more prolific columnists, I do read a helluva lot more questions than I answer. The reason for this is that I feel that a lot of the questions are very similar, so I tend to pick the better worded and/or more interesting ones among them:plus I without fail will answer anything you care to drop in my inbox. But for those of you whose questions I do not specifically address, here are my top five tips to make the world(and advicenators, which is after all the hub of the universe) a better place:
Enjoy!
1)You will generally be happier if you are not
constantly taking your emotional temperature. So much stress is placed these days on FEELING, that people forget that the way to FEEL happy is to DO. So get over yourself and take up skateboarding, drumming(which I highly recommend) "mumblety-peg, if that's where your heart lies". Whatever it is though, just get on with it and you'll be allright.
2) If s/he says "you're too good for me", then s/he isn't interested. End of story.
3)Honour thy father and thy mother, unless they're actually beating the crap out of you, in which case you need to call on outside agents to mediate.In all other cases though, take it easy on your folks-you won't regret it later in life.
4)In 90% of cases, cheating is unaccepatable and inexcusable. If you think that your partner is part of the 10% (or whatever random minority)of excusable cheaters, then ask yourself why. Is it because you're such hell to live with that it's a miracle that anyone would date you, let alone stay faithful? If it is , then you have one of two problems; you either have a personality disorder which makes you undateable, or you have such low self esteem that you believe yourself undateable. In either case, you need help, so go to a counselor, therapist, doctor, whatever, just sort it out.
5) Read self-help books. Just take them with a pinch of salt. Seriously, they make great reading, and can give remarkably sound advice, but you must not believe every word they say, or you will very possibly end up resembling , if not actually becoming , a speed freaked zombie wearing day-glo juicy couture. By self help books, I mean any thing which gives you x number of rules to live by, and suggests that the key to fulfillment lies within these rule(a bit like I'm doing now-book my '07 convention early to avoid disappointment.10% discount for advicenators columnists).Books to approach with caution include "The Rules" and the "Surrendered" series by Laura Doyle. But the jewel in the self help crown has to be the beautiful "The Bitch Rules" by Elizabeth Wurtzel. If you can read this book and not smile, laugh, and just feel unfettered joy at living, you are either the aforementioned zombie, or you are living in some banana republic. In either case, you are beyond my help,but I feel you.
Take care!
Lucretia
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Website: My LiveJournal
E-mail: lucrece_13@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Glasgow
Occupation: Student
Age: 22
Member Since: September 9, 2005
Answers: 155
Last Update: August 29, 2006
Visitors: 18283
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Help me please, fast!
My aunt just called, and she was crying, and she never cries! So I asked what's up? And she said "You need to tell your mom to get a planeticket and come to America" (we live in europe) and I was like whyyy? And she said "Baby, I don't know, I don't know what to do..Your Grandfather is very sick. She needs to know, she needs to get here!" So now it's all on me!! How do I tell my mom that her father might be dying? Do I tell my dad so he tells her? I don't know about that though cause they've been fighting alot lately!! Or do I tell her, and if so, how? Do I tell my brothers (younger) so they know that they should be nice to her?
Please help me, please! She'll be home in a couple of houres and I don't know what to do!
I'm very, very sorry that this is happening to you: I lost my father nearly ten years ago now, when I was about thirteen, so I understand how much it hurts. The only thing I can say to console you is that situations such as these can sometimes bring families closer together. You say that your parents have been arguing a lot: that in itself will have taken its toll on you. Don't forget yourself in all of this-spend time with your friends, watch stupid T.V. programs, anything. Some of my fondest memories of my father are actually of his last days, which the two of us spent in front of the television, watching soap operas. I realise that you are not with your grandfather right now :( but I hope you make it to Europe in time to see him in a recognizable condition. If you do, you will be forever glad you did, as the difference that your presence will make to him is immense-noone wants to die alone.
Everyone has to experience bereavement at some point in their lives, but a shock such as you have just had is especially upsetting. Take care of yourself, and I hope that this sad experience will strengthen your family.
Lucretia.
You're welcome. Anything more I can do to help, just drop something in my inbox or MSN me(lucrece_13@hotmail.com). Take care, stay strong, and you'll be allright. xx.
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(Rating: 5)
thank you for caring so much! ♥ you seem to be a really strong person.
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