Hi Everyone!!
My name is Brenda, and I'm 34 years young. I've been happily married (to the most amazing man) for three years, and we have three children. My daughter is nine years old (my husband has adopted her), my stepdaughter is eight, and my stepson is six. I am currently a full time college student taking Business Administration specializing in Human Resource Management. I am also a volunteer with the Sexual Assault Victim Support Program with our Regional Health Authority.
My hope with this advice column is that I will be able to help people. I've been through alot in my life, and I decided that if I can help people in similar situations, then that could also help me heal, and move on. I won't go into great detail on here, but my motto has definitely become "what doesn't kill us, will only make us stronger".
I was raped when I was 16, and then continually by an abusive boyfriend when I was 19-20. He was an alcoholic and abusive sexually, physically, and emotionally. He unsuccessfully (thank God) tried to kill me.
I've been cheated on...been the cheater, I've gone through addiction, as well as losing my dad. I have clinical depression. I was a single mom for five years before I met my husband. I became extremely obese, and five years ago weighed close to 400 pounds. In January of 2000 I underwent gastric bypass surgery and have maintained a 200+ pound weight loss. I went through my childhood and adolescense being ridiculed for my appearance. I really want to help people with obesity issues.
Currently, my most stressing issues seem to be dealing with my husbands despicable ex-wife. It's hard to deal with someone whom you have absolutely no respect for as a parent, or as a person for that matter. I have many concerns about making a blended family work, so that everyone is happy.
PHEW!!!
Well....I hope I will have many visitors to my column and can help each and every one of you! Chances are..whatever it is you're going through, I've probably been there. I hope to talk to you soon.
Brenda
Website: Help Me, Brenda!
E-mail: helpmebrenda@inbox.com
Gender: Female
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Occupation: student
Age: 34
Member Since: April 9, 2006
Answers: 193
Last Update: October 5, 2006
Visitors: 22496
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15/f
Okayy there is this kid. We have only met like once or twice, but we talk online all the time. I know he likes me but I dont really like him like that. Then one day he asked me how far i had gone with a guy and I told him I had never even had a boyfriend. Ever sence I told him that he hasnt talked to me sence(its been like a week). I dont really mind because I didnt like him/know him that much anyway. But my question was do you think that the fact that I have never had a boyfriend make guys less attracted to me? (link)
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Hi
The kind of guys that would find you less attractive because you have never had a boyfriend, are the kind of guys that you want to stay far, far away from.
What's going through his mind may be...she's never had a boyfriend, which means she's never had sex, which means, I don't want anything to do with her!! Can we say "PIG"?
Trust me, you don't want anything to do with someone like that. A relationship is SO much more than just sex, and as you mature you will see that.
The time will come when you will find a boyfriend, who will not only find you attractive, but will love to talk to you, spend time with you, be your friend (as well as your boyfriend), share special moments with. A REAL relationship.
Life is too short to care what piggish boys/men think. Respect yourself, set your standards high, and a boy out there will notice you, and want to know more.
Take care,
Brenda
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