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Hello, call me Abby =] I'm eighteen and a senior in high school this year. I've always had great advice, I'm just not so great at following it =P Feel free to ask me anything, I'll do my best to give you an answer.
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Age: 18
Member Since: February 10, 2007
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I am gay i'm 16 male i really like this guy we are friends and i have had feelings for him for awhile now but i'm nervous to say anything to him and lately we have spent a lot of time together and i'm not sure but i think he's starting to like me more the other day we were hanging out in his room he sat close to me and smiled and he put his hand on my leg is that a sign he likes me?
should i tell him how i feel? (link)
I think theres a good chance he likes you. Take it slow, and make some advances toward him, like being a little touchy and a little flirty. Nothing too bold at first. If he responds with the same attitude, then he's definitely into you. Things will progress naturally if it's meant to be.
I would wait until both of you have a mutual feeling before telling him you like him, just so you don't seem too eager or if he doesn't feel the same. Unless you can't bear waiting any longer, then get it off your chest. I don't have the courage to do that, but power to you if you do!

Good luck,

-Abby


20/f. So, during the spring, I was taking this science class, which I heard was suppose to be easy. It turned out everyone did REALLY bad because the teacher was terrible. We all picked a bad teacher. It happens. I got a D-! I am a smart girl with a high GPA and I cannot bear to see that D-. So, I can take it again, get a higher grade, and have that "forgiven," as the policy in my university states. If I do, I am certain that I will get an A, with whomever I take it with, as long as it's not this guy. His questions were tricky. I didn't learn anything. And I would like to keep my GPA high for scholarships and awards. Also, I am going into my third year now. This class was a pre-requisite class, so it's not like I need it for my major. I am also planning on applying to grad school, so it's just good to have my numbers high.

So, during the spring I started studying with a guy who was in my class. I started to understand things a little better when I had a friend to study with. But, after a couple of study sessions, he whipped out his penis in the library. It made me EXTREMELY uncomfortable, needless to say. They are offering the course this summer at my school. After that incident, the guy tried calling me and adding me on facebook. I guess he doesn't understand how disgusted and scared I am. My mom came to pick me up at school the other day because she was using my car, and saw him wandering. I'm a little bit scared and I think he's going to take the summer B class because he actually DOES need this class for his major. i don't want to take a class with him. I'm a little scared after that and I don't want him to be in a class with him.

Please help! What should I do?!?!?! (link)
You can't let a perverted guy keep you from doing what you want.

Take the class, and if you see him there ignore him, or give him a polite nod and say that you don't want to talk.

If he won't leave you alone, then you should report him for harrassment. You should have reported him for showing you his penis at the library, he could have been expelled from the university for that.

You may be able to go to your advisor and arrange to be in a different class from him; if not then just try to handle it. For your safety I would never be alone anywhere with him and don't let him follow you to your dorm/car/etc.

He may just be troubled and doesn't know any better. If you feel a real threat then avoid the class, but if you think you can manage it then take it and just be careful.

Good luck,

-Abby


im going to this college in the fall and my sister is trying to go to the same one. she is older than me. she went to a private college transfered to a community college and is now applying to the same college as me. she didnt get accepted the first time she tried to apply to this university. I really dont want her to go. My mom knows i dont want her to go but she wants her to go. My sister is so annoying to me and when ever i get the spot light or having success she has to try and match up to it. I need advice to this. (link)
I'm sure its very annoying that your sister has to follow you everywhere, and jump on your bandwagon. Sibling rivalry is the worst. In this case, there may not be much you can do about it.

Think about it this way.

One, she may not even get accepted to this college.

Two, you don't have to spend time with her once you are there. Your parents won't be able to force you to hang out with her. You can make your own friends.

Three, she might realize that this school is not for her if she only did it to follow you.

Lastly, you might like having your sister there when you need her. She is someone who will always have your back and you can always turn to for support, or if you feel homesick.

Try to keep an open mind, and focus on yourself.

Good luck,

-Abby


I want to get a robo dwarf hamster but i dont know wat to name it. i need boy girl and both names.Please and thank you. =o :) (link)
Perhaps you can do pair names?

Like Bonnie and Clyde? Ken and Barbie? Barack and Michelle?

I named my hamster (when I was little) after one of the mice in the movie Cinderella. Disney characters make cute names, like Jasmine and Aladdin.

Well, those are my corny ideas. Try to be creative with it!

Good luck with your new hamsters,
-Abby


Ok so my names Melinda Grace but everyone calls me Gracie. Anyway, Im 13 and I jus got my period but a little while before that I started to grow hair under my arms and on my private part and I wanna know how to shave without like hurting myself or getting bumps. And how often should I shave under my arms? The hair there is annoying. And on my vagina I have hair but it's not really alot. Should I still shave or wait? Aren't girls suppose to shave there and how often? (link)
Hi Gracie,

Shaving is a personal choice, so the answer to your question is when you feel comfortable.

Get a new razor (Venus is a good brand) and shaving cream/shave gel. They sell all this at the drugstore.

For your under arms, put a small amount of shaving cream and then spread it on your armpit. Make small strokes downward, slowly. You can even watch yourself do it in the mirror to get a better view. After you finish, rinse and check to see if you missed any hairs. Try not to shave upwards, or against the growth of hair, because that causes bumps.

As for your vagina, I wouldn't worry about shaving it right now. No one will see it, and it's a big hassle to shave it all the time. It grows in thicker after you shave and its easy to get razor burn there. Not all girls shave that, it really is a matter of what you want.

You can shave your bikini line if you don't want any hair poking out of a swimsuit or underwear. Do the same that you do with your underarms. You might want to try the mini razors they have made especially for the bikini line. Be very careful and go slowly, stroking the razor downwards.

You might want to ask your mom or an older friend how they do it for more advice. Don't stress about it, practice makes perfect.

Good luck,

-Abby


f/24.
Hello my name is Ashley Neeley, i'm 24 and a virgin, well of my vagina at least. I have had anal sex with my boyfriend who's 48. We do it about three times a day average and my symptoms are usually just a sore, stretched out butthole. Yesterday i noticed that my butthole was seeping yellow puss & had a horrible smell. I went to Walmart and bought Depends, which are diapers for elderly. Is there anything else i can do? (link)
Go to the doctor!

Anal sex is rough on it's own, let alone three times a day!

Anal sex typically causes tearing and bleeding, meaning it would be very easy for you to get an infection. I suggest going to your doctor ASAP, especially since you notice pus and odor. Lay off the sex, and see if you notice any improvements. I also suggest you and him get tested for any STD's, because you can become infected through anal sex.

Good luck,

-Abby


Why are some girls flat chested? What makes them flat chested? (link)
Usually it's just genetics. If your mom has a small bust, you probably will too. Then again, if you have a busty aunt or grandmother, then you may get that. The same thing that makes girls flat chested makes them tall, short, skinny, or thicker. It's just your own individual body type, and nothing to be ashamed of.

There are some disorders that will cause flat chest as a symptom, like someone who is not producing the proper hormones to develop. If this was a problem for you, your doctor should have caught it.

-Abby


I'm an 18yearold guy, and im not fat or anything, but just last night i realised that i have stretch marks under my right leg. Why is this? Im not fat and ive never been fat... but why is this? Btw, my left leg is longer, so is it bcause my right leg is trying to grow? BEcause i have been doing physical therapy stretches. What is it? Will it go away? (link)
Stretch marks can happen to anyone, not just women. They can be from growth or weight gain, and some people are more likely to get them than others.

Maybe you are growing and that's what caused it. It will probably fade away, I've had stretch marks that faded on their own.

If not, there is stretch mark cream you can try that they sell at drugstores. I heard Mederma works well.

Good luck,

-Abby


I have always ALWAYS wanted to be a model, and my boyfriend is hopefully going to be a professional footballer soon/or a rapper. That part isn't idle dreaming by the way, he has sorted out auditions and trials for actual teams and if he is successful I'd love to use it to get into modeling.

The problem is, I honestly don't feel photogenic, I feel like I need to learn how to look good in photo's and what kind of clothes suit me. I'm slim, and only a size 34B in boobs, but I have a nice tight tummy and an hour glass figure. I'm pure white and not very tan so usually pale with light blonde hair that is very fine and hazel eyes. If anyone could give me any advice on style or make up and how to look good in photos as I really have no clue! (link)
Modeling is very subjective; there isn't one definition of beauty or how to look like a model.

There are also different types of modeling.

There is print ad/catalouge modeling. If you have a pretty face but aren't exotic or unique looking, this is for you. They want women who look better than average but still relate-able to the women who will be looking at the ads and be inspired to buy the clothes.

If you are a good height (at the minimum 5'8) and slender, you have a better chance at modeling on the runway. They want girls who are tall, thin, and have unique looks. Victoria's Secret models are not the norm; they are 'sexy' models. They sell more sex appeal then couture, but many have had careers in both areas. For this you need to know how to walk on the runway and how to move your body, and have it look natural.

For editorial campaigns, that body movement is imperative. Practice poses in front of a mirror, and have someone take pictures of you so you can look at them and improve. It is also helpful to look at fashion magazines and practice their poses.


If you go on auditions or casting calls, don't over do it with the looks. They want to see you bare, because the designer is going to use you as a canvas. They will add their own make up and clothing. Leave your face natural (you can do foundation and concealer but not heavy, blush, and some mascara.) and if you have especially nice long hair, leave it down. You can have it natural, straight, or some light waves, but not crazy curly or anything wild. If your hair isn't anything special, pull it up in a high pony tail to show off your face.

They want to see your body, so wear something close fitting but not flashy or provocative. Jeans and a t-shirt (and heels) would work. They want to see you be yourself.

If you want to get this career started, I suggest paying a photographer (find a good one, not a portrait studio at the mall kind of photographer) and start your portfolio. You can send this to agencies, and hopefully you will get picked up. You can also attend casting calls. If you give it your all and work hard, you will be able to get somewhere.

I hope you and your boyfriend can follow your dreams.

-Abby


My husband and I did just fine until we said "I do" and then he became a control freak. He has been married 4 times including me and has abused all of them, even me. I didn't know about the abuse until I did some home work and saw the Div. Decrees. He has got the idea of taking sex away he can ontrol. I guess he can. I just want to know what kind of personality disorder this is? (link)
It is obvious your husband is the one with the most issues, considering you are his fourth marriage.

He needs to feel dominant, and in control of the relationship. He wants you to be submissive and obey him.

This is NOT HEALTHY. This kind of quality can turn into emotional, verbal, and then physical abuse!

You will probably be another one of his ex-wives unless you are proactive about this.

First, I suggest a calm approach. Don't argue with him and don't make it sound like 'You can't tell me what to do!'. Speak rationally, and give him your reason for your decisions. Offer compromises and make sure he is also sacrificing something.

Secondly, DO NOT let him control you on matters that are important to you. There is such thing as picking your battles, but do not let him dictate how you live your life. Small actions can lead into him telling you what to do all the time. When you feel strongly about something, DO NOT give in. Let him know that marriage is a 50/50 partnership and he is not your parent.

Lastly, I strongly suggest marriage counseling. You can see a therapist, a church counselor, or talk to another married couple who have a healthy relationship. Many times, an outside source is needed to help the abusive partner realize what he/she is doing.

Don't take this lying down. These things can turn ugly fast, and you must love your husband enough to work this out.

Good luck,

-Abby


14/f

Every year my junior high has a Last Dance, which is kinda like a mini prom. Last year, all of my friends got ready with their other friends that I barely knew. I had to get ready alone with my mom.

This year, I'm scared the same thing will happen. They're all getting ready with one of the popular girls that I don't really know. My other friends aren't going at all. And my mom is going away this year (not that I want to get ready with her again, anyway). What should I do? Please respond quickly, the dance is this weekend!! (link)
I know where you are coming from, and it is more fun to get ready with the girls.

Ask one of your friends if you can tag along with them. It doesn't matter if you don't know the popular girl, you can get to know her and maybe make another friend.

If thats not possible, maybe agree to meet up with those friends at a certain place so you all can walk in together?

Don't let it stress you out, trust me, junior high dances are just the beginning! Think about prom!

Good luck,

-Abby


ok im a 8th grader and going to graduate june 9 and i just want to know what dresses r appropriate for a catholic school.I go to a catholic school and im not aloud to wear a dress that shows alot of clevage. the trick is that im a really big girl and idk where to get a dress pleze respond fast and oh pleze say were to get them and what sizes they carry. I appreciate ur help alot and i just want to say that iv used thisn site alot and ask a ton of ?'s and i get really good responces.pleze answer in a nise and kind way. (link)
Torrid has dresses specifically for plus size young girls.

I thought this one was very appropiate for a graduation.

http://www.torrid.com/torrid/Clothing/Dresses/White-Eyelet-Party-Dress-564801.jsp

Deb carries many plus size dresses also.

http://www.debshops.com/family/index.jsp?categoryId=4006223

If those don't work, try a department store like Macy's or JC Penneys.

If you are afraid a dress will show too much skin, get a light sweater/cardigan to go with it.

Good luck,

-Abby


Are thongs uncomfortable? Do they make your butt feel like you've got a weggie? (link)
When I first started wearing thongs, it was the weirdest feeling in the world.

If your thong is too small or has the tendency to ride up, it will definitely give you a wedgie. If you get the proper size, eventually you will get used to it and forget you're even wearing one.

They are definitely a necessity when it comes to wearing tight clothing!

Good luck,

-Abby


My childhood best friend wants nothing to do with me, and I can't stand caring for her and she doesn't even care if I'm alive. For example, the other day I emailed her congrats on her graduation and received not even a thank you, however she was quick to reply and reunite with the old group of friends we use to share, I even feel left out of that group now...I just don't know what is wrong with me. (side note: people often tell me I am kind and fun to be around so I'm even more confused! I am completely open to suggestions on how to improve as an individual.) (link)
Don't be concerned with changing yourself.

If your friend isn't interested in talking to you, then thats her problem. People spread apart and decide what friends to pay attention to and what friends they don't exactly want around anymore. This can hurt a lot, but if she decides you aren't worth your time, then she most definitely is not worth yours.

All you can do is try, be nice and friendly, and focus on yourself.

Good luck,

-Abby


ok. let me rephrase the question since i don't think anyone understood quite what i meant last time. People think i am emo and gothic. What i meant when i asked how to get people to stop thinking i am, i meant like how do i put on my makeup and dress so that i won't look goth or emo? (link)
Goth and emo are characterized by lots of black. Dark clothes, possibly with bands/chains/studs on them. Heavy black eye make up. Dark hair, usually styled like this for girls:

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://female-fashion.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/long-emo-hair.jpg&imgrefurl=http://female-fashion.co.uk/%3Fp%3D56&usg=__edbfJDfnlHYD2_-nJi_1ikv1v_k=&h=400&w=300&sz=43&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=GfAfPCq3HckwsM:&tbnh=106&tbnw=81&ei=C6HYTfUtytvRAemQkfwD&prev=/search%3Fq%3Demo%2Bgirl%2Bhair%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1041%26bih%3D405%26tbm%3Disch&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=668&vpy=35&dur=1329&hovh=259&hovw=194&tx=144&ty=160&sqi=2&page=1&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:6,s:0

It isn't that hard to change your style. Wear brighter colors. Wear brands that aren't associated with goth/emo, like Hollister. I recommend Forever 21.

Form fitting clothing will also help. That doesn't mean you have to wear skin tight garments, but show off your shape a little.

As for make up, don't go heavy on the black eye liner. Try a neutral eye, or maybe some spring colors like purple.

If you are pale, its easier for people to assume you are goth. Try sweeping bronzer over your cheeks, forehead, and nose.

If your hair is dark, people can also assume you are emo or goth. Try adding some girly touches, like side swept bangs, or fun headbands.

Don't change your style just to please others, but if you need a refreshing change, those tips can help.

-Abby


So, I'm 15

I really don't like the way I look "down there". I've never had sex, but I do masturbate and this is really hard to talk about, because I don't talk about it.

I don't know if it's nothing or what but, something sticks out, outside of my vagina and I really don't know what it is, if it's my clitoris or what.. I'm just scared it's abnormal, I don't want to go to the doctor and be embarrassed..I don't believe I have an std because I'm still a virgin..will some one please help me out here? ://
(link)
I feel the same way sometimes.

With me, I have something 'sticking out'. One of my labia's is long and looks like I have something hanging down.

If it was your clitoris hanging, then you would feel a lot of pleasure/feeling when you touched that part. However, it likely isn't your clitoris because that is usually hooded by the labias and toward the top of the vagina.

If it doesn't cause you pain and has always been like this, I wouldn't worry too much about it. If you would like to make an appointment with a gynecologist, it would be fine to discuss it. You can ask them all the questions you have about sex and your body.

I've had sex before and my boyfriend hasn't mentioned anything about it. Most guys don't look directly at your vagina during intimate activities. They probably wouldn't even know if something was abnormal.

And you may not even be abnormal. What I learned in health class is that every vagina can look different. Different sizes, different colors, unique to the person. Don't stress about it, odds are that you are perfectly normal.

Good luck,

-Abby


I am 16 male i'm a virgin i haven't had a girlfriend yet i'm nervous around girls and a little worried about getting close with a girl
i'm not ready to get serious or have sex yet my penis is not real big and i'm worried about getting intimate with them is that weird?
how do i stop being nervous around girls? (link)
I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 17, so don't feel bad about it. It took me until I was comfortable with myself and talking to guys to get to the place where I was ready to be in a relationship. Everyone has their own speed with that kind of thing.

Some guys I'm nervous to talk to, and other ones, like my boyfriend, it was pretty easy to talk to. You'll find a girl who it's natural and almost effortless to talk to; that could be the start of a good relationship. Trying to force it with someone isn't a good idea.

I'm sure you have heard this a million times, but just be yourself! You can start conversations with girls and some won't go anywhere and others will hit it off. It just comes on it's own time.

I find that special things come when you are least expecting it, so just relax and have fun, and before you know it you'll meet a special person.

And EVERYONE is nervous about their first time. Everyone! Girls and guys are self-concious about their bodies. Once you get comfortable with a girl, sex will come naturally when you are both ready. If you feel nervous and weird while doing it, then you probably shouldn't be.

The best advice I can give you is let things come naturally and don't push it.

Good luck,

-Abby


Hey do you think its odd to be 13 and still sleeps with your parents? it is really embarrasing and my grandparents make fun of me and even my own dad but my mom dont. I didnt have my own room until i was 4 and so I always slept eith my parents. Also my siblings and things would scre me about ghosts and stuff and a lot of times I see things like wierd stuff in the middle of the night and I think about ghosts. Also another thing i worry about is that someone will break in and I want to be with my mom. When I have friends spend the night with me I sleep in my own room with them and things (which most of the time we don't sleep) but anyway. Do you think it's wierd or abnormal please help!! Thanks! (link)
It is abnormal to be sleeping with your parents at this age. It means that there are some emotions inside you that you need to deal with.

For some reason, you feel unsafe and insecure at night. You need your parents presence to feel protected.

Perhaps you would consider going to a therapist to discuss this, and see what is really bothering you that you can't sleep alone.

I think you should try to gradually break away and begin to be more independent by sleeping in your own room. After all, you are a teenager! You want to do your own thing with your friends and you will be going through a lot of changes these next few years. The privacy and alone time of sleeping in your own room is really needed. I'm sure your parents would also like some privacy!

First, try sleeping on the floor by your parents bed. You're still close to your parents but at least in your own 'bed'. Do this for a few nights.

Then, try sleeping right outside their room by the door. You can leave the door open if you want. Keep this up until you feel comfortable.

Now, try to sleep in your own bed at least one night a week. Get a night light and maybe a noisemaker that plays soothing sounds (like the ocean or rainfall) that will keep you feeling safe. I sleep with a fan on because it blocks out background noise, because I am superstitious like you and it creeps me out to hear any noises late at night.

I also sleep with a pillow over my head to further 'block' anything out. You could get one of those eye masks and ear plugs/the noisemaker to block out any odd sounds that might scare you. You can sleep with the door open or closed, and just remember, your parents are only footsteps away! You are safe.

I hope you can try these things and start to feel more independent. My brother slept with my parents for a long time, but now he loves having his own private room to be in. You will too!

Good luck,

-Abby


Hello, I am 18 years old and have graduated highschool.
I am a virgin still. And am dating this guy for 3 months now. My question is, is it too soon to be fingered/hand job in your opinion. I have done this before but with a guy I was in a relationship with for a year. I want to do it, I mean it's not like im going to have sex or go further but i also sort of feel a tad sad for my mom because we are so close and i feel she would be dissapointed in me. :/
(link)
I think you should just consider what feels right for YOU.

You are of age, and a lot of girls today go a lot further in a 3 month period of time, so it's not like you would be considered skanky.

I had sex with my boyfriend after we had been going out for 3 months, and if I based my decision on how long we were going out, I probably would have tried to wait longer. But at that point it felt right for both of us, and I don't regret it. We are still together and sex has caused some issues, but it has also brought us closer.

You can listen to your mom's advice, but ultimately, this is your choice. You shouldn't let her decide for you. If that was the case for everyone, many daughters would be at the convent by age 18!

Are you mature and responsible enough to handle becoming sexual with your boyfriend? That doesn't just start with sex.

Can you two talk openly and honestly about your sex lives? You need to know everyone your boyfriend has been with, if he always used protection, etc. You can get an STD by performing oral sex on him if he is infected. You should be prepared to have protection incase you do decide to have sex.

Is your relationship ready for this?

Are you comfortable with your boyfriend? Does kissing come naturally, or does it seem awkward or forced? A good sign of if you two are ready to do more things together is if things progress very naturally and feel effortless.

If things do get awkward or if this causes problems, are you prepared to talk it out and solve it?

And most importantly, does it feel right to you? You should want to do these things, not just do them because it seems like time. In the moment it should feel good and natural to you.

If you can think about all that and feel ready and good about it, then go for it. If not, then there is no shame in waiting. This is all completely your choice.

Good luck,

-Abby


http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkuz8mngx11qd8pl1o1_500.jpg (link)
It's backwards in the picture, but it spells LA, like Los Angeles.

-Abby




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