Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

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Q: hi am a 15/f... and i had sex with ma boyfriend ON november 14,2008... and he used a condom but he pulled out 2 fast and i think the condom migth have broken but he said that it didnt... So on December 14 a month after i feel unconfterval... i start feelin like i wanna vomit... n my head hurts... n i start feelin lazy... but the thing is that On December 16 i supost 2 get my Period n... i got it a day before but it wasnt my period it wus like stain... like it wus coffee stain... and i dnt knw i got very scared.... so Do you knw whats Wrong with me??? Can i be Pregnant??

Relax because thinking you are pregnant will deffinaly make you feel like you are and make you miss your period. I dont know why but it does. I would wait 1 or 2 more weeks and take a pregnancy test.

Q: What are some homemade christmas presents that I can make for my mom and dad?
Thanks :)

One year my brothers and I made a "coupon" book. With chores or stuff they would like. Breakfast in bed, all floors vacumed something like that and they could use them when every they wanted. Stuff like that.

Q: how can you really know the difference between love or lust?

I have had sex in the past with a guy where right afterwards he got up got dressed and took me home. I am engaged and when my fiance and I have sex afterwards we lay and cuddle together we start off with the kissing and stuff like that. it means more and you just know. You know when its all about the sex or when that person you are with wants to spend the rest of their life with you.

Q: why is healthcare a political issue?

Because, people like my self can't afford healthcare. and they have some idea stuck in their head that they can make it affordable.

Q: hi

i'm a freshman in highschool(15) and my girlfriend is a sophmore. yesterday she came over and was pretty horny so we decided to have unprotected sex for the first time.
When we were done fooling around, she told me to go in just once and i did for a few seconds and pulled out because i felt a liquid come out of my penis, i saw some clear stuff. I searched on another site and apparantly its "precum". well i noticed it, whiped away and we fooled around like handjobs and fingering..i went in again later and the same thing happened so we stopped. Is she pregnant?
Thanks a bunch.

If her period is late than have her take a test. I was told precum is strong. Any whom. I am going to tell you a story about me. I am 17 years old and my son will be 2 in January. My son's father left me (not saying you would do that to her) but Diapers, Formula, Clothing, Food, Toys, Bed. A child is very expensive. When he or she is sick and you are up all night with your child than have school in the morning. your more than tired. When your girlfriend would be pregnant she will find out whom her real friends are. Who makes fun of her , who will stick by her side. Be careful. It's a tough life to live. Trust me.

Q: my ex best friend and i had been ex best friends once before, but she asked me online one night ... "how can I be you?" it creeped me out majorly and i told her that we needed space and that I'm my own person and she should be too. she was depressed [now we were friends again recently] and she told me that she "marks herself" so people will feel sorry for her, give her the pity vote, and be her bff. i think that's wrong. i told her she needs to talk to someone so now she sees a therapist, but its not helping. she used me to get to all of my friends and then she told them all lies that they believed, making me look like the bad guy when i did nothing wrong. so i yelled at her and we don't talk anymore. i want to tell all of my friends what she says about them, because they deserve to know that she really doesn't like them, shes just insecure and is trying to get popular. oh and she is also doing this to one of my best friends. how do i stop this? she just cries to her "friends" and they get all mad at us. i don't understand. i want to expose her, but i don't know how. please help. with anything. all feedback and advice is helpful, thanks so so much.

Well i think you should help your ex bff. A bunch my friends when i was in middle school used to cut them selfs and i talked to the nurse about it and she had me write out the girls and or guys names on a piece of paper and give it to her. She spoke with all of them they started a group for them they got out of one period once or twice of week and meet and talked about there problems and why they cut. It helped all of them a lot. You should let your friends know that she is going through a tough time and although you two arn't friends anymore you can't say what she is going through and that she is crying out and needs some friends or people to be there for her and that she is lying to do that. tell them that what she said wasn't true and you hope you all can still stay friends.

Im Adding More::: It's the samething. It is causing harm to your body well in this case to hers. and could get worse. Maybe something really is bothering her.. Or if its just for attention and people catch on to it they will start to ignore her and they she could go into cutting or doing other stupid things for attention each worse than the last. It's something someone needs to help her with.

Q: Hi, I recently just got my first boyfriend, and I really like him a lot. He went out with my best friend, who is perfectly OK with it, trust me. But, I'm not sure how to act. I am still being myself, obviousely. However, I feel like I'm acting more like a friend than a girlfriend. I just want to know how to act more like a girlfriend.
Thanks!
ps. we hav kissed..but have not made out.

Your doing great. Being your self is a good thing to do and a boyfriend is supose to be like your best friend. You can tell him anything. Don't be shy around him. I cuddle with my boyfriend a lot like lay my head on his shoulder at stuff. just be your self

Q: why is is so hard to get over your first love and why is that even after they hurt you so much its still harder? what have you (guys and girls) done to get over them and can you ever even get over them completely?

It's so hard because you didn't break up with them, they broke up with you and you are still in love with them. To get over my ex. He hurt me twice before i had no contact with him online, phone or in person. i cut him out of my life completely.

Q: 15/f about to go on pill. I am not sexually active but want to go on pill for benefits such as no cramps, since mine can get bad, and shorter n lighter periods. But I want to know if you think the pill will kind of encourage me to have sex, like make it seem like its not a big deal because im protected. My friends say im very sexual, because I say a lot of sexual things, like who i would and wud not have sex with, how and why, sex jokes, and kinky things i guess. I'll admit i kind of want to but at the same time i dont want to take the pill if Im going to get Motivated to have sex.

The only way you are going to be "motivated" into having sex is through your mind. The pill doesnt cause you to want to have sex. Knowing you are "protected" is just a safety. Taking the pill isnt a for sure thing that you will or will not get pregnant.

Q: is loving someone enough to make a relationship work? idk im so lost it seems like its never gonna work but i love him and he loves me... bad bad circumstances tho we fight all the time and he makes me sad alot and i never get to see him but when ever i try to end it i cant. I love him and i dont know what to do

Loving a person isn't enough to keep a relationship together. Honesty, Trust, Etc. Needs to be in a relationship. If you never see him, your always fighting and he makes you sad chances are your relationship isnt going to work out. If i was in your shoes i would talk to him and tell him that you two need to talk in person and if not in person in the phone tell him how you honestly feel. If he fights about what you have to say or yells or something like that i would break up with him give it time to heal and try to move on. if you tell him how you feel he should be like aw baby i dont mean to make you sad or something like that.

Q: im always wearing a sports bra even when im sleeping and i was wondering if it was binding down my breast from growing?

No plenty of woman wear sports bra's all the time, but your breats need to breath as well and sleeping with one on i was always told wasn't a good idea. I used to sleep with one all the time. and once i found that out i stopped wearing one at night... i also foudn the only regular bra that i like is a push up bra from fashion bug.

Q: ok, so there was this guy that I liked for a long time. A little while ago I decided I didn't like him anymore (even though part of me still went back to liking him whenever eye-connection was made or we talked) sometimes I still think about him, and I think I noticed that no, i'm not completely over him. I know that we've had a past for liking each other quite a bit, and then one of my friends started liking him in october.
Now, yes, they are going out. I haven't told anyone that it bugs me, just now they are bf & gf and get to do all that girlfriend boyfriend stuff I would think about.

Also I kinda like another guy now, but i'm kinda confused why I'm feeling so down.
Because I really do still like that guy who I've liked for a LOT longer than just October, or am I just jealous that I never got the chance with him? A bit of both maybe?

I have to admit I was really shy with him the past years & now am just getting more confident (before I would lie about liking him when he didn't lie about liking me). So yeah, I had really messed up, though this year im not nearly as shy & had decided I wouldn't lie anymore about it, though I also was sure I lost all my chances because I had so many. Now I'm regretting it again I think?

I'm just confused with my bummed-ness :P

also didn't tell my friend that I'm bummedbecause, I thought it would maybe ruin things for her? Idk, idk even if I should have told her.
I haven't tld anyone, I kindawanna keep quiet about it, not sure which of my friends to talk to if I even should..

btw that guy I'm kinda crushing on now has been calling me pretty & beautiful (and has gone through phases of that ever since coming to our school last year, kinda has asked meout about twice too). Also one time he called that guy a jerk for saying something rude about me & can be really nice to me, though not always so nice to others.. maybe its just a show though. He can also say some gross things sometimes. What do you think about him?

I hope I'm not coming across as wanting to ruin a friendship or breaking them apart or anything. Just kinda confused with why I'm feeling how I am ^.^

Hun, you don't need to wait for a guy. Maybe you did ruin your chances with him, but everything happens for a reason. Even if we don't know what those reasons are. Maybe it is a way to tell you that trying for this relationship you going to get a broken heart in the end and being friends if better than a broken heart and not being friends. This guy you are crushing on, seems to like you back, The gross things and stuff are just flaws. Everyone has them. When my fiance and I are started dating he used to fart and burp around me all the time. I thought it was gross but it was his way of being comfortable around me. Id rather him be comfortable rather than uncomfortable. We used to walk around a store and be like she or he has a nice butt. We were ujst comfortable around each other and maybe he feels as if he can be comfortable around you. Maybe giving him a chance wouldn't hurt.

Q: Alright, so this isn't really an advice question, but I guess it is. So all you have to do is tell us about the guy you are crushing on, some things about him, and why you like him.
The boy I like is super cute, brown hair with little waves and the warmest brown eyes you've ever seen. When he smiles he becomes 40 times more adorable, if that is possible. He's pretty shy, but it works for him, and he's very athletic, but I have never heard him brag about it. When we talk, he likes to ask questions and he is one of those people who can make you laugh even when they aren't trying. He's a study buddy and a good one too. He is incredibly stubborn, but I seem to be able to talk him into almost anything, even though he is yet to convince me of the "awesomeness" of football. He is one of the few people who can put up with my excessive talking, and he even claims to like it. We can talk for hours on end, at school and online until past midnight. He loves dogs, and hates almost all cats. His favorite food is mine too, and we are both in love with the same kind of cookie. I know that no matter what happens between us down the road, he will always be my buddy.
Okay, now it's you turn!! Just tell us about the guy you crush on or who you are dating, and maybe add some basic knowledge about guys - thanks!

My boyfriend and I started off talking online actually. He had just moved back to this area and I had just moved here in June. He was looking to meet new people and make new friends. Never planning on even dating. We talked on the phone for hours and he used to always date those barbie looking girls. I am a single mother, hadn't lost all the weight from being pregnant. We can talk about anything and be comfortable around each other. We have had our fair share of arguments but when we are in person and look into each others eyes we just cant be upset with each other. He holds me like he means it. and i have always wanted a guy to place his hand on my cheek when he kisses me and he does that. he is amazing with my son. There isn't words to describe how much i love him honestly. Guys are hard to understand and you will never understand them all the way. but what you can understand is amazing.

Q: well... im 17, im a guy and i love snowboarding skateboarding, playing guitar and im lonley

Do what you love and if that is snowboarding go it! It may be hard but focus on that is that is what you want. A relationship will find you and things will work out if it is ment to be but dont let the thought of jumping countries bother you into staying just to find love youll find it because im sure you wont jump countries your whole life you may settle on a place eventually.

Q: From pretty much the beginning of uni until about 3/4 weeks ago I was seeing this guy I lived with. We were relatively coupley and slept together regularly. About a month before it was over I started asking if it was going anywhere and he wouldn't give me a straight answer, we continued to sleep together and then eventually I demanded a straight answer as it was driving me insane. He panicked and ended it.

I still like him an incredible amount. Now it's over he seems to come over and flirt with me excessively every time he's drunk. He never actually tries to make a move though, it's as if he's just flaunting in my face what I can't have. He was flirting incredibly with this other girl the other day right in front of me and today he was talking to me (whilst drunk) about how she gave the impression she liked him and he was going to try and get somewhere. I am pretty sure he knows perfectly well I still like him!

I feel so upset and used and want to get over this guy but I still can't help but like him, he's really funny and smart and good-looking and listens to my problems when I'm upset. But I know he's used me and now he's just mentally manipulating me and I don't know what to do. Can someone help?

I was with my ex for sometime we had broken up because he was to controlling. a few months later we started talking again and i was still very much in love with him. He asked if id come over so i did with my son. We hung out i stayed the night at his house and helped with his bday the following day well then after that he had his girlfriend call me and tel me not to call him. i was devasted and depressed for months. i had to cut him out of my life completely to get over him.

Q: My little sister is 17 years old and I think she's hooking up with my friend who is 23. I know that they care about each other because they both come to me and talk about it. The only thing I'm worried about as an older sister and best friend is that he could get into a lot of trouble if the wrong person finds out, right? Is the sex age of New York 17 even if the other person is over 21?

Im pretty sure they are allowed to be together with a parents consent. But he could get in a lot of trouble if your parents press charges.

Q: I really like this guy (we are H.S. Seniors) and we go to the same church. At our church we have a band. After school I texted him and told him I was thinking about joining, but my mom works most saturdays (he plays keyboard). He told me to just try to come. I told him that I would but my mom works most saturdays. Then he told me to just try to come this saturday. I told him that My mom can't pick me up til 6 (practice is over at 3:30) and he told me to just stay til 6. Everytime I ask him why he wanted me to join, he always, somehow, avoids the question. There are times when I think that he really likes me, but he doesn't text ppl first and he is very forgetful.(He wants me to help him become unlazy and non forgetful) There are times when he says random things to me, i think to just talk to me. I find him always looking at me and he smiles a lot. When we are around other ppl, we really don't talk much, only when we are alone, we talk. I know we are friends, but could we ever be anything more?..
One morning I texted him to tell him that i might not talk to him for a while because something happen the day before, and after i texted him he called me. I know he cares about me. I know we are friends, but anything more?

Guys are confuseing and hard to understand at time. It seems that he is crushing on you. I think you should tell him how you feel or ask him how he feels. Or ask him if he likes anyone and who. Something like that to let him know you are interested.

Q: 14/F

My doctor told me that if I felt any lumps that I should talk to him. He told me to check regularly. So, I did. It's been two months since we spoke. Last night, I was checking and then when I touched near the middle, I felt a lump and, I tend to be freaked out easily by anything that seems unhealthy. Well, I closed my eyes and trierd to calm down, then fell asleep. When I woke up, I check again, and the lump was gone. What should I do? I can't go to the doctors because my mother says I'm just over reacting, but I still have a bad feeling. Anyone know what's wrong?

Stay calm about it. Check during the morning and before you go to bed. If you feel it again go to the doctor. If you dont feel it chances are it was nothing. If you are really really bothered by it. Tell your mother that you think you should talk to your docotor about it. is there a certain reason he asked you to check regularly for a lump?

Q: 15.f

so one of my best friends has a boyfriend and they've been going out for about a while. however, she's getting a little upset with him because he is not managing his time well in terms of academics and extracurriculars (he's always stressed out, which stresses her out). she even does homework for him.

unfortunately, i don't think she's handling the situation well at ALL. i mean, she's all like, "i'll help you!" and helps him, and then holds it against him, and it's obvious he hates that. for instance, we had to write an essay recently and he asked her if she can EDIT it. he had already written it. she did so, but then in school in front of myself and another guyfriend, she was like, "i practically wrote it since i had to edit EVERY SENTENCE." and that's pretty mortifying for him if you ask me.

so why doesn't he just do his homework himself? well first of all, he's in all honors and AP courses and he also does a ton of extracurriculars, and he refuses to drop them. if he doesn't ask her for help, he ends up getting really stressed out, and if he DOES ask her for help, he feels mad guilty. and she's not being very supportive of him; she mainly ridicules him for not managing his time well. she has a crapload of her OWN stuff to do, and it's very difficult for her. if she helps him, she gets stressed out because she has SO MUCH WORK to do. if he doesn't, she hears him complain, she gets stressed out because he's stressed out. lose-lose situation.

SO, i wanted to know what i should do. both of them are very stressed out right now and frustrated with the other, and it is NOT my intention to create even more problems amongst them by getting involved. for a project we all have to do, she refused to let him take his part (although he INSISTED he would do it, she knows he will only be overwhelmed later) and took it on herself. obviously, i offered to do it for her. she refused. then we decided i would do half of his part and she would do the other half. she feels so badly asking me for help because it's like a domino effect -- he doesn't do his work, she does it for him, she gets stressed out, i do it for them, i get stressed out. and she doesn't want that.

but i hate hearing her complain. and i hate hearing her completely verbally abuse him. she embarrasses him a lot and i feel so badly for him.

i want to know what i can do to help. i do not want to interfere with their relationship by talking to him behind her back because i don't want her to get upset with me, but i really don't want this to get out of hand. i feel worse for her boyfriend because he has so much to do, is so stressed out, and has a crazy girlfriend who guilt-trips him. i've asked my friend to just TALK to him calmly (not ridicule him) and explain that he should manage his time better or drop something, but right after i said that she just ridiculed him more.

do you think i should call her boyfriend and ask him directly if he needs help? he needs a friend, and his girlfriend is stressing him out now. he needs someone to talk to cause none of his guyfriends would understand. would it seem justifiable if i merely CALLED him and asked how he's doing, and if there's ANYTHING i can do to help him? he needs someone to HELP him, not ridicule him for making a few mistakes in his life. jeez.

thanks.

I think they need to slow down. If he can't handle the work in the advanced classes maybe he should move down into the regular classes in a few classes if not all. or drop some of the extra stuff he is doing. Your friend needs to not help him he is old enough to learn he needs to balance his work load on his old. he is taking on to much and give or take a month or more they wont be dating and you all probably wont be friends (may or may not happen) because you will all get stressed and irriated with one another. talk to your friend first. and make her sit down and listen to you. if she refuses be like this is important you and him are going to burn out and if you wont listen to me. ill tell him and see if he will listen dont say it to mean./

Q: I took some classes to become a makeup artist, which I am now (they were a bit expensive) now I heard they are giving some hair classes for about 700 dollars (for 2 days). I don't know if to go for it and take them or work on my makeup business and later on enroll in them? What would you suggest?

It depends on you. 700 dollars is a lot of money but if it is a career you want to continue why not? knowing make up and hair makes you more trained and will offer you a better career in the future

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.