Wife, mother, loyal friend to the end, model, classic car collector. almost 30 years old, and seen alot in my few years here on earth. People usually come to me for advice, and i give in return grounded, realistic answers.
Gender: Female Location: San diego Member Since: January 18, 2005 Answers: 822 Last Update: June 30, 2016 Visitors: 31655
Main Categories: Love Life Friendship Work/School Relationships View All
Favorite Columnists Dragonflymagic adviceman49
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there is this guy lets call him Rudy well when I was in English class ( well I sit next to him) our teacher gave us a mini quiz and so while doing it he hit me with a rubber band but on my thigh and every time he playfully teases me and he kicks me and I do too but he is always making me laugh and always saying nasty things and I think he likes me cause he always looks at me and smiles at me he teases me a lot he touches me playfully a lot and he always listens to me I need help do u think he likes me ...................................................................................... please answer no sooner than later I need help now does he like me or not (link)
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YUP, i'd say he likes you! go for it!
good luck ; )
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When I'm horny I like to masturbate but I've noticed that fingering myself doesn't turn me on like it does for most girls and to get off I use the old " pillow hump " way and it's so much helpful so why isn't fingering getting me off is there something else I should know about 😂😂 idk I know this is weird but I really want to know (link)
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Well no thats not true, not every female gets off on a pillow hump or fingering. Try getting something that vibrates like a toothbrush with a shirt or thin material over it (for clitoral stimulation only) or a personal back or muscle massager. These are all things no one would automatically suspect would be used as a tool for that. Anything that vibrates. The female clitoris has about 8,000 nerve ending in it from what ive heard and so with enough gentle vibrating, that should be enough to get you off, at least until you could figure out what else to do.
Your body could just be changing and you may need more to get off now then you did before. (its ok and it happens)
good luck
I'd like to add here that Im not TOTALLY backing electric toothbrushes, but ive HEARD that it works amongst women i know so long as the head is covered with a soft fabric like a clean towel. Its simply a little bit of vibration and should not be inserted anywhere and is ONLY meant for outside clitoral stimulation. Minors often are not allowed to just walk into sex stores and buy toys or go online and buy something without someone else finding out. So i understand in that aspect. If anything here is to be used it should be clean and covered with a soft cloth first. Ive tried massagers and those work fine.
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I know this is a weird question but Could a woman become Pregnant if a guy ejaculated on a woman's Vagina and she played with it maybe getting some inside. Does that actually happen?? (link)
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im gonna say yes if immediately after he ejaculated on he vaginal opening, she playing with it and using fingers unintentionally got some up inside her. It does and has actually happened. Another thing, semen can actually live for up to 7 days inside the reproductive system if conditions are right and its warm, and moist and theres mucus to live off of....google it.
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This not I am quite into that I have been dying to be asked out by just did. All my friends think he is a jerk. But I kinda like him. What do I do?😖
-Brooklyn💖💖 (link)
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Well if all your friends think hes a jerk. think first about WHY they think that way.....did he do something to them? or does he do bad things?? sometimes your closest girlfriends can see what you cant because your blinded by feelings and their not. Sometimes they can see someone for who they really are and because their your friends and (usually) just want whats best for you then you should take what their saying into consideration. They were in your life before him and they'll be there after him to pick up the pieces when he hurts you and maybe their trying to warn you ahead of time.
So be guarded, go ahead and give him a chance if you want to, but just know that you were warned ahead of time so whatever you get yourself into is on you and no one else. This is what comes with the territory when dating in adult life so just make sure your heart is ready to deal with that should things go downhill.
Now, on the flip side they may just be saying some of these things because their afraid they'll lose you or once your with him, you wont hang out with them anymore ever.
This is another part of life your going to have to learn to deal with, youll have to learn to make time for your friends still as well as your boyfriend. (should he become that)
Remember that you cant wrap your whole life up in guys ok. You still will ALWAYS need your best girls because they'll be the ones that will be there for you after things go down and hes long gone, so you need to make sure you treat them with just as much importance as your man. The saying "all you need is your man" could not be more wrong. You still need to do things that feed your soul, make you happy, and content in life LIKE going places and doing fun things with your friends. If this is their fear then you need to talk to them about it and let them know that they will never lose you even if you have a man.
Theres a special connection that all females (who are real friends) have with each other that males will never understand and you still will need those connections no matter what.
; )
good luck, youll be fine
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So there is this boy I guy you could call him a guy bestfriend but his Grandpa died a while ago... He didn't want to talk about it and he has been grieving about it and all he tells me is "its just sad" I know he feels more and I want to help him, what should I say to him... I am a kind of shy person so I really need some stuff to say to him, it is getting worse and worse as the days go on... (link)
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Well first off im really sorry her lost someone like that. Its hard to take a death in the family and even more so when your close to that person.
Heres the problem first ok....you cant shove your "help" down someones throat ok, so just remember that going into all this. He may still be in alot of shock and thats why he feels like he just doesnt even want to talk about it right now because that would make it more real and hes not ready for it to be yet.
Secondly, everyone grieves in their own way, and alot of times youll find that males arent as well trained in dealing with or talking about deep emotions so he might be really looking inward right now and questioning alot of things. This is totally natural after someone dies.
What you CAN do is tell him that your here to listen if he needs to talk without judgement. If you go to the grampas funeral or any type of ceremony for him with your friend then bring something along or remind your friend that the best thing you can do is little things to honor his memory and through this, you can always feel close to him and keep his memory alive. you can buy flowers to bring to the ceremony to give to his family.
Let him know that you understand loss and that it can be hard to deal with and tell him about when someone you know passed away. Let him know that you know this is obviously not the same as his situation but that death or loss touches everyone. Its True, we all have someone that was special to us (friend or family) that lost their lives for one reason or another.
Give him time, and if your with him and he wants to talk just sit and listen and say "yeah.....awwww.....i can understand where your coming from" things like that.
good luck ; )
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So i just made a fool from myself cause i texted him this morning "hey mister where you hiding you have been quiet suma go MIA on me..hope u ok and nt working to hard and stf..you being missed,oh and im seeing you saterday neh lol no questions asked..hope to see and hear from you soonest
Enjoy your day
PS let me knw.....that was my text to him this mornig..im not obssesd with hm or wateva i just want hm to know i care and things but it seems like i care to much...you said its oves so il leave him alone..im sorry i just ddnt want to lose him but it seems like i did so its my fault coz i care to much..what do i do now just leave hm (link)
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Listen your just hanging on and trying to dig your claws in and thats not what he needs. He (as a male) needs to know that if he chooses not to be with you that HES missing out here ok. Not you.
Its ok to let someone know you care but your taking it way to far now. Let him have his space and if he comes back he comes back. Relationships takes two people and if he doesnt want to meet you half way then theres nothing you can do, you cant force it ok. Set him free, and should he wake up one day and regret what he did HE will be the one losing sleep over you. It shouldnt be the other way around.
Look to the future, and dont be afraid to let the good things in. Dont shut yourself off completely cause youll miss the good things the future has in store for you.
good luck, your very kind and obviously caring, which means youll EASILY find a new guy just give it time. ; )
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Hey thanks for your advice :)
I was wondering what to do in the mean time while she is being a bit short and such. Should I just leave her be for the moment and not contact her often or just act like its nothing.
Any help is appreciated cause I am very confused. (link)
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Just ask her if shes feeling ok since she mentioned that her period was coming and you thought she might not be feeling well. Act sympathetic and concerned for her but understanding and kind. Listen to whatever shes saying and try not to be confrontational right now. Girls on their periods can sometimes say things they dont mean out of emotion because of the PMS and the drop in hormones. They can become very easily upset over small things, and since you havent been dating very long you dont know how bad her periods get (all girls are different) and some have worse symptoms than others.
Just say things like "awww im sorry well let me know when your feeling better or if theres anything i can get you and when its over we can go out again and have some fun!"
Your still getting to know each other basically from what i got from your original post so just try to not smother her but go ahead and let her know that your here for her if theres anything you can do. ; )
good luck
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I really like this boy in my class. He is super sweet and I have known him for a long time. I have liked him for as long as I can remember, and he used t like me too. Last year, I traveled, and did not go to the school that we both go to. When I was gone, he liked me, but now that I am back, I am not so sure. He likes another girl, and we are complete opposites! He isn't in any of my classes (except 1) and knows I like him. How do I get him to finally like me again? Him and this other girl are all anyone is talking about, but I just feel awkward whenever anyone brings it up. Is there ever a chance with him? (link)
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Awww well ive had this happen actually with good guy friends but it was the other way around.
Firstly try to remember that guys really are simple creatures, they may not know at this young age what exactly they want in a female girlfriend and it certainly doesnt mean that shes replaced you if he liked you first! ; )
Find ways and opportunities to talk to him. Hit him up, ask him hows hes doing, tell him you know its been a while and you just wanted to say hi. Things like that.
Find out where he goes after school if he lives in the same city and go there! talk to his friends and hang out with them.
good luck
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I also have started having some problems with bedwetting. Started out one in a blue moon, now 3 times in one month. My annual physical found nothing wrong with me and my blood work is routine. I am 37. (link)
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Im not sure what to tell you right as of this moment but if you can i would try to get to the store and buy a plastic sheet to put over your bed ((just for now)) until you can get to the bottom of this, and maybe some adult diapers. I know this might freak you out but if theres nothing wrong with you then it could just be anxiety attacks, or that you didnt use the bathroom right before you went to bed.
It could be alot of different things, you didnt mention if your a male or a female, weather youve ever given birth or had any kind of surgery so what your asking (even with me having a family full of nurses) is hard to answer.
Try no fluids before bedtime and try to get yourself to pee even if its just a little RIGHT before bed. Your bladder is constantly making urine ok, so you could have overactive bladder and some sort of weak leakage problem, but im just not sure because of your vagueness.
monitor your pee when you DO pee. what color is it? do you drink water often? do you drink alot of coffee? when you DO pee do you find yourself running to the bathroom? Do you ever go to the bathroom feeling like you have to pee really bad but then hardly any comes out??
these are all important things i would need to know in order to help at all.
Get some adult diapers if you have to JUST FOR NOW, and try to get seen about this.....
good luck
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Hey
I started seeing this new girl. We have been on several dates and they've always been good and fun. Last Tuesday we went out and it was great but she has been kinda distant with me since. I'm not delusional we made out at the end and everything so I know it went well. She had mentioned that she was getting her period soon so maybe that's what I'm thinking she's been distant all of a sudden. Up until this week we've been texting non-stop and whatever.
So I guess my question is do girls on there periods, not saying all girls, act in this kinda off way?
Also we did go out for food yday and it was fun but she said she wasn't feeling great so I'm probably just answering my own question here. (link)
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Theres a good chance that yes, shes not feeling good because her period is coming. Alot of times youll discover that its actually the days or (about a week) beforfe the actual period that she'll be feeling moody, fatigued, cloudy headed, and just not up to things and she usually would be BEFORE the actual period comes.
She might have been quiet because she knows she has PMS and didnt want to say anything that might sound angry or emotional and hurt your feelings. If theres nothing going on then i doubt theres really anything to worry about and she wants to be with you but shes just not feeling good right now. ; )
dont worry, he'll probly be back to herself in a few days
good luck
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I still havent heard from him its been 4days since he send me that text and 3 days that i texted him but stl no response..should i mayb send a text to find out if his okay or should i just leave it and give it more time mayb i wl hear frm him and if not leave hm alne (link)
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Listen you have to stop obsessing ok. If he cares about you HE will get back to YOU and let you know whats going on. Any relationship between too people is supposed to be a team effort. It takes two people to be in a relationship of ANY kind (even a friendship) and if someone knows you, cares about you, and thinks youll worry then they will know they should do the right thing and contact you.
To ME, right now his actions are speaking for themselves. Hes NOT contacting you back my dear. Its over obviously....He doesnt care about you as much as you do of him. You need to except that and move on. It sounds like your really emotionally invested here and hes not at the same place as you are. Its not your fault or his, this is just something that happens sometimes in life. The best thing you can do now is just be more careful about how much your willing to go out on a limb for people your interested in and be SURE that they are doing things that show you they are just as invested and interested as you.
good luck ; )
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im girl, in 3rd year in high school and im shy....i really like one guy in my school..he is about year older than me so he is in 4th grade but the problem is that we dont know each other obviously...i just see him on hall or on some school events sometimes..i would really like to meet him but im shy and also how can i start talk to him when we are in different school year...i know that some of girls in my class have him as a friend on facebook.im not that outgoing as girls in my class so i dont know many people from higher grade...i would be weird if i added him on fb and he wouldnt have known who i am...so what should i do..how should i let him know that i like him when i see him only on hall at school or when there is some school event (link)
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Well if you know that some of your friends are friend with him on facebook then request his friendship and then say "heyyy i seen you beforeeee your friends with one of my good friends (insert name here) and then when he sees you at school the connection will be closer because you both mutually know a bunch of other people.
Keep it friendly on facebook, wink, give smiles, if you know hes into any sports say that you thought you saw him playing and that he was pretty good! and let him do the talking and just work off that! = )
Is he into any sports or anything you could relate to that maybe other friends or family members of yours are into also? FIND things to talk to him about. When he has to leave or cant talk anymore just keep it really friendly and allow him to leave, make the interactions FEEL easy and natural.
When your in person together, ask if you can borrow his pen or something to write with, act like you forgot yours and then if you cab KEEP the pen for a day or two so that you have another excuse to walk back up to him at any time and give him the pen back. If hes in front of his friends thats ok too! Then say "HEYY!! i forgot to give you your pen back! thanks for letting me borrow it! hahaha" Always smile, when your leaving him, say "ok see ya laterr!!" this give him the impression that your definitely OK with seeing him later (whenever that is) If someone acts weird about you saying see ya later to him just say that you say that to everyone and act like their the weird one for even bringing it up. ; )
good luck ; )
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People really love to gossip about me and I keep hearing that they don't like me.
The thing is that I've never been mean to anyone, I am not cocky, I always try to be as polite as possible etc.
Most of these people have never talked to me outside school, they don't even talk to me IN school. Yet they pretend like they know I am a horrible person without knowing me at all.
This makes me really sad and I doubt myself as a person. It also leads to me not liking myself very much. Furthermore, it just makes me feel very angry.
I have one more year left, how can I deal with this and not care about what they think of me? How can I like myself as a person?
The reason this bothers me so much is because they have never taken the time to actually have a conversation with me, yet they decide to dislike me for no reason at all. (link)
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Ok i know this one WELL, so i can understand.
Like the other person said there IS always going to be people that wont like you no matter how hard you try. BUT (and this is a major one so pay attention) you CAN cut down the number of people who say things about you by trying a couple of simple things.....
What you can do (and this is what i have used for years) is to do something called "killing people with kindness" Now if your willing to put in the effort, you can do this.
I was actually quite popular in high school i talked to everybody but there was still people who didnt like me because of it. The battle they suffered was not with me it was with themselves.
You need to be able to be a little outspoken in order to do what im about to suggest so be prepared.
When theres people talking about you and you know who they are, if you see an opportunity to go up to them and do something nice or say something nice DO IT. Weather its infront of their friends or weather its by themselves and your the only one to witness it. Pretend like you dont know what they said about you and compliment them on their outfit or their hair or something like that. This will show that person that whatever it was they DID say, doesnt faze you and your going to continue being unaffected by them or their negative BS and be happy no matter what because whatever it was they said means nothing to you and you dont care.
Pretending to have never heard what they said (if it ws through a bunch of other people) is just hear say, unless they said it to your face. If they say something mean to your face then just laugh and be like "hahhaa OKAYY" and walk off and pretend like you dont care. MAKE them see that nothing they do or say (unless their willing to be nice) matters. see? and in reality it DOESNT anyway! see how great that is?
Just keep being nice to the friends you have, when THEY tell you things that "other people are saying" just say you dont care because their life doesnt matter to you anyway" and this will also let your real friends know that (if THEY were making this stuff up and telling you just to get you upset for any reason) that it still doesnt effect you.
See, ive had people tell ME before (who i thought were good friends of mine) that these OTHER PEOPLE were talking about me when they WERNT! just to keep me away from that person because they were jealous or controlling and didnt want to lose me as a friend because of their own insecurities. So if you just answer back "ehhh i dont care, i dont know them and if thats how they wanna be then thats fine, thats on them" then it shows that your so neutral about it all that your not even willing to say anything back about the person that your "friend" can accurately SAY that you said.
Sometimes people will lie to you and say "this girl said this and this about you" in an effort to get YOU to say something bad back about Females can be really back stabbing at times so you have to be careful not to fall into the social traps they can set up.
good luck, ; )
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Well I have a friend that I meet online, I’m from Europe and he’s from Asia but currently studying in LA. We started talking one and a half year ago and developed a very beautiful friendship even though it was a virtual one. We talked for hours through messages and Skype about anything from things that happen in our daily life to politics and economics. And since he doesn’t know English that good I offered to help him whenever he needed at his homeworks. In time i started to help him with music, math and other things. I considered him a special friend and it didn’t matter if he was waking me up at 3 am to talk or just ask my help with a resume about Renaissance period. And I think he considered me a good friend too, we exchanged gifts and all his free time he was spending it with me. He said I’m his favorite friend, he would like to show me to his parents and even sent a message to my mother thanking her for giving him such a friend.
This winter vacation he went back to his home country. At first he felt strange among his family and friends and was asking me to talk to him every day. And because I was a good friend I accepted it, it didn’t matter the hour or if I was having the Christmas dinner with my family.
But after the first daytof New year things started to change. That was the last time we talked face to face on Skype, it was I think on Friday. Saturday and Sunday we didn’t talked at all and because I felt strange I sent him a message Monday morning asking him what is he doing. After a few minutes he told me he was with his mother and I told him to have a good time and not to forget to take a selfie with his family since he made me do the same thing. Later that day I asked him to talk on Skype and he told me he was getting ready to take the last dinner with his family and that he’s going to do it tomorrow at the airport. The next day I waited to talk to him even though I was having classes but he told me he can’t talk to me because he needs to stay on a large row to embark. I understand him. When he landed in Vancouver his layover city I asked him how was his flight, what did he eat, how is he feeling but his answer were very short and eventually he told me to shut up and stop sending him messages. Then I saw he was online on Skype and asked him to skype but he refused and logged out. Later that night at 3am he sent me a message telling me that he’s flight to LA has a delay.
On Wednesday he sent me a picture showing me that it rains in LA and he is all wet. We didn’t talked much.
On Thursday I saw he was online on Skype and asked him to talk but he refused saying he’s at school and he’s going to do it later that day after he’s setting his internet at his new home because he was having a bad connection. The time passed and seeing he doesn’t say anything I asked him if he managed to make his internet. He read my message and didn’t said anything. On Saturday seeing that he doesn’t answer and that he’s online on messenger I started sending him message on phone and messenger app asking him if he’s mad on me, why isn’t he answering me, that I’m scared that I may lose his friendship for something that I may have done to him and asked him to forgive me. At the same time when he wasn’t talking with me one of my neighbors died of cancer and I sent him a selfie with tears in my eyes saying him that I’m very sad. He always said he wants to see me crying and I thought we are going to start a funny conversation from this.
After 2 days he sent me a message asking for my help at English and I helped him. Again he was ignoring me every time I was asking him what is he doing, where he is and telling him to Skype (I was always seeing him online)
After a few days I asked him if he’s still alive and he said yes. I told him that I started to book hotels for our trip in Europe that we were planning for months and asked me why didn’t I talked with him. I said that he didn’t talked to me for a while and I didn’t wanted to disturb him after which he said he’s going to talk with me latter when reaches home. After 2 hours I saw him online on Skype and didn’t talked with me.
After 2-3 days he asked again for my help with an essay and I helped him as good friend even though I stayed awake from 2 to 4 am for this.
And again didn’t talked with me until I asked him when is he going back to his home country, what plans does he have for volunteering. Seeing he’s answers are short again I asked if he still wants to go on the summer trip with me. He read my message and answered after 3 hours that he’s going to buy the plane tickets to come to me in march. And that we should go in more countries not only Norway because is expensive for him. He proposed to go on Portugal, Spain, France and Belgium but I told him that I’m not going to have the money to visit all this countries. He said not to worry because he’s going to give me 1000$. I refused and said to give up at France because is expensive , dangerous with all the terrorists attacks and that my mother isn’t going to let me there. But he told me I don’t need to tell me mother and didn’t want to hear about giving up France. He proposed me to stay on hostels to save money and we can even spend time with our roommates. I told him I can’t share my room and bathroom with strangers and told him that he’s traveling with me and should spend time together not with strangers but he told me not to tell him what to do.
Finally seeing that I don’t want to go to France he told me I’m a coward, I am not like him and Bye.
I asked him where is he going. He told me that I don’t know why he ignored me and started telling me that he doesn’t belong to me, that I shouldn’t cry because he doesn’t care about me, I shouldn’t try to make myself a part of his life and he doesn’t want to be a part of my life but only a good memory, let’s cancel the travel I can’t handle you, you’re like a dog, and he didn’t felt anything when he saw me with tears in the eyes and he doesn’t like me to beg for his attention. That i am stressful because I don’t know my mistake, I shouldn’t control him.
After this he unfriended me on facebook , deactivated his profile and blocked me on all messenger app except one where he sent a sad piano song, telling me he composed it for me and told me bye. I’ve sent him a few message but he just read them without answering.
All I can think about is that I’m really a horrible person and feel like it’s only my fault for losing his friendship. Why would he end our friendship using the excuse that I disturbed him with my messages 20 days ago? The only thing i can think is that he wants to travel with someone else and that's why he decided to cut contact with me. Was I so stupid for letting him control me? But in my conception for a good friend I would do almost anything. Can this friendship be saved somehow, is it worth saving? I even thought of taking a plane and go to see him in September and talk to him.
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Let me just say first that im sorry that your going thru this. Ive had someone cut me out of their life before after i thought we were the best of friends. Altho the hurt never leaves you have to keep moving forward with your life.
It sounds to me honestly like he was just using you for your help with his homework and pretended to be friends and really wasnt all that invested like you were.
It sounds like he did a whole lot of inconveniencing you for his OWN benefit and then once he was done with you he kind of just said "screw it". It sounds like he may have just been telling you things he thought you might have wanted to hear for the time being because ask yourself, who makes MAJOR plans to fly country to country you only to cancel them as easily as he did??
People who consider themselves good friends dont do things like that. When they are busy, they TELL you theyve just been super busy and they make the effort to explain themselves to you because they CARE.
Im also wondering why in one of your statements you mentioned that he always wanted to see you cry?? who what kind of friend would WANT to see you cry?? that sounds awful.
Good friends dont wnt to willingly see you cry or hurt you, or do anything that would put stress on you like that. This person sounds immature, selfish, and isnt considering that you cant just go off to other countries with people you barely know. Notice how once you told him you couldnt do something for him he suddenly turned against you?? dont you see that as odd??
This person is acting highly suspicious to me and i wouldnt trust it. Telling you to stay in a hostel instead of hotel isnt safe either. Then getting mad at you because you dont wanna bend over backwards for the guy isnt right either.
Let me tell you something that i tell alot of people on here.
You need to make sure that your not investing more into any given relationship MORE than the other person because when you end up getting hurt, it will hurt MUCH more then it would have hurt them. Its sounds to me like you went too far out on a limb for this person you dont really know i real life and he put on a good show.
You can skype and talk and chat every day but until you know that person IN PERSON and FOR REAL, you dont REALLY know them. understand??
I dont think the friendship is worth saving, i think you need to move on. Your not a bad person, and you deserve better friends around you. You have nothing to be sorry about towards him, he is the one that should be apologizing.
good luck.
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I'm pregnant with my first child and since Valentine's Day is coming up I want to surprise my boyfriend and ask him to be my Valentine because he's been such a good daddy to be. I want to do it in a way that includes our little boy but not sure how to! I'm 16.. (link)
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you could compile a few photos of you two together (or have some photos taken of you guys showing your belly, and then buy one of those picture frames that has a bunch of smaller spaces for photos and then put the pictures in there with a valentines day card in the middle for him to hang on his wall??
You could try to order a box of live butterflies or a kit to grow them then on valentines day you could take him to a park and watch him open them, and put a photo pf you guys at the bottom of the box?? or a note or small card....(you can decide that)
go to either wallmart or an arts n crafts store and just wander around for a while for things that could give you inspiration. Look on pinterest for things to make too.
good luck ; )
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I have a swarm of fruit flies in my kitchen and I don't know how to get rid of them! I tried putting out a cup of cider vinegar yesterday..... the flies are buzzing around it but won't actually go into the vinegar.
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you can also get an empty soda bottle cut a few small wholes around the top and then put vinegar inside the bottle and close the cap. This will draw them in ad once their in, they dont know how to get out. Leave them around for a few days.
Also Nats and flies love dark moist warm places to hide and breed under or IN, so clean all the spots and there could be water, check the window screens to see if theres gaps where their getting inside at and tape those up or buy a new screen for that window. if you bring the old one, home depot can make you a new one thats they same size.
A fan pointing on medium to high and pointing in that direction will aid in this because they cant fly too well if theres to much wind moving through the area.
It can be tough to get rid of them but if you give it a few days and try to make sure theres no wet dark areas in the kitchen and its open air flow in there then they'll eventually die off. Do you have a trash disposal?? put some vinegar in there too and cover the opening for a while with something that air tight so they cant sneak through like a rubber can opener or a lid. Then get to the store and buy some garbage disposal cleaner.
also check your sink drains and your trash can. (there could be a hole ripped in your trash cans bag that your not aware of and nats like to breed in between there too. The take the trash and properly clean out the trash can before putting a new bag in.
good luck ; )
i get them too sometimes and it can be a real pain!
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So what do i do now just stay away and wait till he shows up again do u think he will..im confused and hurt mayb its my own fault..he knew i wntd to see him but he dd what he did and i ddnt mean to come off as desperate..i think i will just leave him alone..like u said its over and he wants nothing to do with me anymore i cant help bt wonder why and if il hear from him again (link)
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Well i cant tell you what someone i dont even know will do because i would really just be guessing. Thats a question that no one can really answer.
Well wondering is always going to be there but you cant wait around for him, you have to continue to live your life.
We're all on our own paths in life. You are going to come across all SORTS of people, some will be good, some will be bad, some will WANT to be good and decent but just wont know how yet because they havent grown enough as a person when you met them. understand?
At the end of the day YOU and only you can decide who and what kinds of people you want to run with along this path we call life. Do you want people who are healthy mentally? responsible people that will encourage you to reach for your dreams? or people who make you feel like you have to chase after them because you arent worth being chased?
at the end of the day its all up to you my dear. ; )
I know you can do the right thing...the thing thats best for you....good luck
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Ok so last week sunday i asked him if i can see him but then i havent heard from him a few days untl i textd hm to say he musnt forget to let me knw and he said he wont the next day he textd me to say friday i then asked what time and he said he dnt jnw i then said ok and thank you and he textd bck asking for what and i said letting me see you the next morning he textd me to say he will let me knw cause hes gna let me knw cause hs nt sure whats happing i then said okay but then i havent heard frm hm so i textd hm and tld hm to njoy hs wkend yesterday i got a msg frm hm to ask what im doing tonight i then replied bt he ddnt get it so i phoned hi twice bt he ddnt pick up hs phone..he then went online but never read any of my msgs he probably dltd it i then phnd hm again but he again neva answerd..so i texd hm sorRy bout the phone calls..i dnt knw if he got or read it..ths morning i mgsd hm again to say sorry and that i was lukn forward to seeing hm but it neva happend and i hope il see hm soon weneva...im not sure if he got or read my msgs bt i heard absolutely nothing from him...why did he text me if he lnew he was goNa ignore me again..i feel embarassd cause i made a fo0l from myself and he is probably thinking it hay..i was really luking forward to seeing hm but then that happend..do you think its over this time,will i hear from him again..i decided to move on though cause i dont think hs intrested anymore he is playing games with me hey..dd i handle the situation wrong..was i clingy or whateva cause i phoned hm thrice..what do i do if he shows up again please help do you think he will..we hardly speak must i just stay away (link)
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Yeah im sorry to say this to you but it sounds like you came off pretty desperate and like your just chasing him and this is coming from someone who is looking in from the outside of this whole situation (me).
A guy that really likes your back as much as you like him will WANT to see you even if the cost is high know what i mean?? why should you chase a guy who doesnt like you as much as you like him?? thats not being fair to yourself and your under valuing yourself.
Theres a theory that i live by when it comes to this kinda stuff and basically its that emotionally, when someone is willing to go sooo far out on a limb for someone else, they often find out that their standing there alone.
This means that if you like or are more invested in someone who is not feeling the same way back then youll find yourself heartbroken when you discover that they dont value you as much as you value them.
Just think about that when you have personal relationships (really of any kind) not just with guys. ; )
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My cousin is having a baby shower Saturday its a girlany ideas on what I could give her? (link)
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you cant give too many boxes of disposable diapers, wipes, and that white butt chaffing cream!
when i had my son we went thru that stuff like crazy!
But i would definitely check with the others if you can to see if theyve already bought that.
Also ask if she has a baby registry, so if you dont know what to pick then you can just follow that instead.
If she doesnt have one then maybe if your hanging out with her before the shower you could take her inside a store and help her start one. They give you a scanner and all you have to do is walk around the store and have her scan the stuff she wants. its really easy.
good luck ; )
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Me & my bestfriend have been friends since Middle school (shes always been insecure/threatened type inside and out), & i guess you can say she's ALWAYS been jealous of me for example, she'd always get mad and annoyed that if a guy she liked thought i was hot so she'd always tell them something like "but she said you were ugly" or something worse. she'd also always try to find a way to bring me down physically and/or mentally. I guess i can say she has gotten over that from what i can see for myself (idk what she says behind closed doors) so NOW lol, she would say i dress to fancy or nice to go to a basic place & i would tell her that iam not a basic bitch i have to look good wherever i go and that she doesn't care about how she looks. She also has a boyfriend now and he would give me compliments and she'd flip out on him. I told her that i wanted to die my hair blonde and like a monh later she dyes her hair blonde and told her boyfriend that i copied her when i finally dyed my hair blonde. She's always been the one to always i'd say complain that i'm concieted, i mean i am, concieted, confident, etc. I always would say "I'm THAT BITCH" because i feel as though i am. but fast forward now she says that she has to look good all the time, she speaks like me, wears the same jewelry as i do, she use to complain about how long my nails were when i would get them done, now she gets her nails long, she trys to wear the same clothes as i do, trys to copy my hair styles, she calls herself "that bitch" now, she trys to be into stuff like i am for example, i am so big into fashion&shoes and she's trying to be the same way (it just doesn't work because she cannot dress) if we go shopping and i say something is cute for me, she buys it, she one day said "(my name) wants to be me" & it was such a lie like i honestly cursed her out because its totally the other way around. she says stuff like "(my name) taught me." like I don't know, am i crazy or does she want to be me? i need your opinions. (link)
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Ok this is a little tough for me because you didnt state your ages so i dont know the maturity level that im dealing with here but since you said middle school im going to assume your now in high school?? So ill break down what you said cause ive had i dont know HOW many friends copy me and now that im older and their getting married and having kids, they've stole baby names from me! so i understand more than you know.
"Me & my best friend have been friends since Middle school (shes always been insecure/threatened type inside and out), & i guess you can say she's ALWAYS been jealous of me for example, she'd always get mad and annoyed that if a guy she liked thought i was hot so she'd always tell them something like "but she said you were ugly" or something worse."
Ok to ME, this is a huge red flag that this girl ISNT your friend. Shes trying to sabotage potential personal relationships for you and thats not what a friend does. At this point i would have stopped being friends with her.
"she'd also always try to find a way to bring me down physically and/or mentally. I guess i can say she has gotten over that from what i can see for myself (i dont know what she says behind closed doors) so NOW lol, she would say i dress to fancy or nice to go to a basic place & i would tell her that i am not a basic bitch i have to look good wherever i go and that she doesn't care about how she looks."
Ok this is abusive right here. This is an active effort to slowly break down your confidence because her OWN is in very short supply. She clearly has her own agenda and thoughts and views of you as a person and shes playing off that when she interacts with you on a daily basis. I GET that girls call each other nasty names sometimes and its meant to be playful, but it gets to a certain point where its really not funny or warranted anymore and its just damaging and hurtful to the other person. Youll know your "over" using the playful nasty names when you start to have more and more days where you see her and she does it and instead of feeling that funny playful feeling BACK, deep down your actually hurt and really not feeling it...; ) youll know the feeling when it comes just trust me on that.
"She also has a boyfriend now and he would give me compliments and she'd flip out on him. I told her that i wanted to die my hair blonde and like a month later she dyes her hair blonde and told her boyfriend that i copied her when i finally dyed my hair blonde. She's always been the one to always i'd say complain that i'm conceited, i mean i am, conceited, confident, etc."
Ok shes flipping out because first off she obsessed with you and your a threat to her big time. So her man giving you any kind of attention (even if its positive and totally neutral) is bad to her and goes against her efforts to sabotage your confidence. Thats totally wrong and unfair by the way and not how a real friend acts. Secondly If shes seriously saying to your face that your conceited and always copying her then i think its time to dump her honestly. You dont need that kind of drama in your life and you know what maybe you should just go shopping by yourself, then see what happens when she has no one to follow and copy anymore. lol. that'll be a show worth watching.
"I always would say "I'm THAT BITCH" because i feel as though i am. but fast forward now she says that she has to look good all the time, she speaks like me, wears the same jewelry as i do, she use to complain about how long my nails were when i would get them done, now she gets her nails long, she tries to wear the same clothes as i do, trys to copy my hair styles, she calls herself "that bitch" now, she tries to be into stuff like"
Ok heres the problem with that part. Friends who tend to hang out alot WILL tend to be into alot of the same things, INCLUDING clothes so unless you stop hanging out with her then shes well within the social confines to be able to like the same things you like. On every other level though im seeing someone who has alot of issues and is abusive and taking those issues out on you because they arent strong enough within themselves or comfortable in their OWN skin so they want to try to wear someone elses. By allowing her to copy you, you arent helping her become more comfortable in her own skin, in fact your sort of unknowingly enabling her to continue this charade by not saying anything. Im not saying what shes doing is your fault because obviously youve never dealt with this before but in life, people come with all sorts of issues and flaws and you have to decide what your willing to put up with.
"i am so big into fashion&shoes and she's trying to be the same way (it just doesn't work because she cannot dress) if we go shopping and i say something is cute for me, she buys it, she one day said "(my name) wants to be me" & it was such a lie like i honestly cursed her out because its totally the other way around. she says stuff like "(my name) taught me." like I don't know, am i crazy or does she want to be me? i need your opinions."
Ok heres the thing, and i say this to a lot of people but i think i better repeat this to you because the sooner you understand this the better off you'll be in life later.
We're all on our own paths in life. We each run our own unique paths (even the ones who wanna copy other people to death) but its your choice at the end of the day who you wanna run along side ok. You cant make excuses for still remaining friends with someone who does this kinda stuff to you, theres no one else to blame but you. You are allowing this abuse to go on (maybe) simply because you've known each other for along time and you have history together (which i get i really do) but you cant allow someone to disrespect and abuse you like this. "what you allow will continue" its a simple statement that really says alot.
Its healthy for good friends to be into a lot of the same things but when it takes the turn that this relationship has, it becomes unhealthy, obsessive, and abusive. This girl is actively trying to sabotage you at every turn! lying about you, telling people your saying things you didn't say just to ruin things for you or make you look bad! this girl is CLEARLY not your friend anymore. She might have been "back in the day" but people change....and sometimes its not for the better.
Respect yourself and pull away. IF she gets suspicious and asks why just be honest. Because you care for her then be kind but you need to be honest. If shes your friend then she needs that. Sometimes people dont realize what they have until its gone.
The next time she does anything like this, nip it in the bud right then and there. Tell her you love her or care about her (or whatever) but that she needs to stop this. Stop the lying about you to others, stop saying false things about you, and stop trying to constantly copy you and then claim your copying her. Tell her you need a break from her and then let her stew on her own thoughts for a while and then wait and see what happens.
Keep more stuff to yourself and DONT tell her when your going to buy new clothes, then people will see that you had that stuff first. ; ) She'll love THAT. ( sorry thats my playful revenge side coming out)
good luck! ; )
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