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Q: sori thins is long. well i went out with this guy (lets call him james) n we were really close but we broke up. well its been about 3 months an suddenly he started txtin me and sed that he misses me and that he still loves me. well thats the thing i really love the guy. i know hes not good news and that i shouldnt but i cant help it. but then today i txt him because i was bored and he said that it wasnt him that had been txtin me it was his cousin. well i didnt know what to think. but then i hear that a rumour is going around school that im going out with a friend of mine from a different school(lets call him chris). James didnt like him when we were going out because he always felt theatened by him. i dont know why i think its because chris is really rich and james thought i like him for his money. anyway i got told that james knew about this so has he just said it wasnt him because of the rumour? i dont want to go out with james i just wantto know whats going on! please help!

Your not going out with chris and this is just a rumour right? james is threatened by chris so you think he really was txt messaging you.

I'm really not sure if james was txting you or not, but I think you should just relax and let this little rumore pass. Correct it if you can and before you know it another rumour will pop up.

You don't want to go out with james and your not going to so this really isn't your problem.

next time you aska question read over it because half of that stuff I don't understand.

~kooka

Q: well i found out that this guy likes me and ive liked him for ages but he never knew that. well anyway weve been txtin each other and chatting a lot and he know that im interested b/c i told him i liked him when he sais he liked me. well this was like a month ago and nothing happened. he hasn't asked me out or anything. we were going to meet up to go to the cinema but he sed he couldnt go at the last minute b/c he was grounded. so is he interested or not? i just feel like hes messing me around and i really dont want that but i dont want to give up on him if he is just shy (which i hear he is) so is there hope or not?
please help

I would not like to be messed around with like that.

When you do go why don't you ask him out? If he's shy then he is prabably scared that you'll turn him down.

I'm sure he likes you you just have to make the first move.

~kooka

Q: hey!! my hair is just under my boobs,a bunch of layers,and bangs up to the middle of my lip.My fave is oval and i have brown soft hair. Please tell me the PERFECT hair stlye for me!! Or any good ideas for a summery hair style/cut!!

no one can really give you the PERFECt hair style. I have a good image in my head and no one knows what you look like.

I saw you look up differeny hair styles on good. thats what I did and showed a couple of cuts to my friends and my mom.

only you can find the perfect hair style.

~kooka

Q: i am 20 and preganat with my second child judt told my boyfriend i am pregnant last night and he told me to get a abortion what do you think about that? when i was fertile i told him i was and not to cum in me but as you can tell he did it anyway and i asked him are you sure about what you doing he said yeah. do you think i should break up with him cause he doesn't want to face up to his responsibilty? then on top of that right after my son turned two his mom had a bad stroke and now she is in the nursing home and he doesn't go see her and he said he doesn't because he doesnt like seeing her like that dont you believe that is wrong? i just started going to see her just me and my son and i told her i am pregnant and everything is okay she is going to do fine and i will visit her more often. the real problem is i think my boyfriend is cheatin i ask him and he says no and ask ,me to put hickies on his necks but i foumd his boxers and it looked like he had sex with someone on thet period i am gon ask him about it do you tthink i am wrong for qestiong him about his where abouts and other things? or does that sound like ii am insecure because he has cheated on me in the past and i aint trynna catch nothin.do you think havin a friendly conversation with the opposite sex is cheatin? if you can please answer these questions and have a nice day thanks once again

he just gets me mad. I really don't think that his oppion should go into the birth or abortion of your second child. I do beleave that he is cheating on you, has done it in the past and from what I hear he's not treating you like a father of your child and boyfriend should treat you. I do not think he is goood for you and your baby.

And not once did you mention that you had feelings for him. As far as I think, I think you shoudl break it off with this guy. Do it before it affects your baby.

I really think that you have every right to question where he is and why he has blood on his boxers. You need to question him and what his doing. What if you do get an STD from him?! Hes not worth that risk.

And no I do not think that a friendly converation with the opposite sex is is cheating. We do it every day we talk to our boos or co-workers (or in my case fellow students).

And for one last thought I do think that it is meen that he doesn't want to see his mother like that. But it does make sence, I do think it is nice that you are visting her and I think it would be nice to keep on doing so. But really this is not your problem.

Hope this cleared youe mind
~kooka

Q: How exactly is being anorexic bad for you? People has said that if you're anorexic your body loses all these nutrients but what are the actual like 'symptoms' you get if you're anorexic. Besides dizzyness and fatigue.
Thanks I'll rate 5 for any decent answers!

here are some websites that you can look at.

http://www.anred.com/defswk.html

http://www.mamashealth.com/anorexia.asp

this one is good an straight forward
http://www.wramc.amedd.army.mil/education/pat_edu/womenhlth/adolescent/anorexia.htm

just scroll down and you'll find what you are looking for.

Q: recently my friend and I have been stealing a lot. it's like every store we go to, we almost always steal atleast 1 thing. we steal simple things, like make up, food, skin care products... when she first told me that she stole things with her friend a few months ago, I laughed at the idea and I couldn't believe they were so.. bad. but when I saw them in action, I realized how easy it was. I only steal when I'm with that friend, and even though now I'm better than her at doin it, I still feel extreme guilt sometimes. she doesn't feel any regrets at all. I kno I should stop, but I just wanna kno if any of you have stolen things and have gotten caught doing it, and what were the concequences. I will stop eventually... but it's really fun and easy. if my parents even found out, they would literally disown me

I aso used to steel. Although it usally was just junk food from a courner store I did see my self getting better and and I would steel more stuff. I would only steel with this one friend and it wasn't untill she moved away and my other friends got really mad at me for stealing, then i stoped. I know you say now that you will eventually stop but really you don't.

if you got caught stelling alot of stuff from a makeup store or something in a mall they may call the security gards. You will be banned from the store that for sure and depending on how classy the store is you could get anything to being banned, to getting the cops called on you to haveing to call you parents.

My friend who stole 24/7 got caught and banned and since then she has never stole again. I know it's hard not to steal with your friend but you either have to take control and let her steal or stop hanging out with her.

sorry thats the truth.
~kooka

Q: ok.... well i have been going out w/ this boy for about 4 months now and i really love him alott!!!! so i am 14 and goin into high school and yaa. so and latley my boyfriend has wanted to go to 3rd base w/ my (down muh pants) i no he is ready and i trust him but i dont now if im still to young or if i should jus do it or wait mann i am so confused ill rate 5

If you're not sure your not ready.

You should feel really comfortible with this before you try it. It's simple. If you're not sure your not ready. Plus 14 is really young to committ like this. You have all your life to have sex.

hope this cleared your mind.
~kooka

Q: ok so i took some quiz and my results said..

Your a straight-laced girlie girl with just a hint of your butch side somtimes popping out!

what is straight-laced supposed to mean? and what does it mean "with just a hint of your butch side sometimes popping out!"??

stright-laced girlie girl, it well simple girlie girl (not so sure on that one) But 'butch' meens really tom boyish. It's usally used to decribe lesbians who are very tom boyish.

~kooka

Q: okay this weekend I'm meeting my boyfriend's ENTIRE family at his sister's graduation party, and they're the REALLY formal type who like kiss you on the cheek and stuff. well you know how when girls kiss in the cheek? do you move your head to the left or the right? cause every time i do that i always kiss the wrong side and we always bump and its so embarrassing haha...

what other ways can i make a good impression?

Humm it really depends on the person, there is no real way to do it. But one tip is to what till the person leans in, then decide which way they are going.

When you go there to make a good impression, make sure your not too shy but not trying to grab the spot light. Keep your manners up when your eating dinner. When your done eating place your fork, knife and spoon beside each other on your plate quitely. When making conversation put your knife and for down to talk. Oh and don't chew with your mouth open but you must already know that one.

and most of all relax and have fun, people will see right through you if you try too hard.

~kooka

p.s. when ever I want to make a good impression at a friends parents house I always comment on the decore and the food.

Q: heyy..thankd for your advice it helped alot..i no i dont love him i just like him alot and like ive never had a bf (hah wat a loser i am lol) and like i just really want sum1 to like me and like he liked me once but he didnt ask me out and its like weird srry i no its like confussing but yea..and ur rite bout all the things you said..you seem like a good person.
thanks again,
julie

Thanks so much!

I know what your going through. My second boyfriend (of three days hehe), only went out with me because he wanted a girl. And same here. I'm sure you'll find some one soon.

Love
~kooka

Q: What do u do when the guy youve been going out with dumped you cause he wanted someone hotter?
age 13 gender female

never talk to the bastard again.

don't tag along and try to become his girlfriend again. And don't take that idoit back.

~kooka

Q: i just started my period... im a little late .
what should i use tampons or pads?

i really think that you should you a pad first and then a tampon.

thats what most people do. I do however really advice you to wear tampons later in your period. I just started useing them and they are a god send.

~kooka

Q: so my sister just got a mini doxen and my aunt is a groomer, is it true when it's fully grown, it will become a mean dog? are they good dogs?

it really all depends on how the owner raises the dog. If she wants to know a good 'kit' to raise her puppy try the Urban Puppy Kit.

http://www.urbanpuppy.com/

it's a step by step puppy training kit. the author had to put her dog down because it was violent so she made a puppy kit so that dogs wouldn't grow up like hers. I think for your kind of dog that might be violent it would be a good choice.

~kooka

Q: whats with all the questions about 14 year olds smoking and drinking. its illegal no matter HOW they do it whether they get caught or not. am i totally out of my mind or are some people just asking too much of the columnists?

I know!!!! i was thinking the exact same thing. I answered three questions today all 13 and 14 about drugs and smoking. A 13 year old girl WANTED to start smoking. It's sad really.

A semi friend of mine is trying to get to smoke.

*shakes head*
~kooka

Q: what is the best way for love to happen? i've heard that love for sight is just lust. i think love is build on friendship, is this true?

Love is anything you want it to be. I Love my pets my mother my father. But your talkin about the opposit sex kind of love.

some people say "love at first sight" and when they see the person they know they are for them. Some people think you must work at love.

There are no rules in love and sometimes you wont expect it when it hits you.

~kooka

Q:

on my birthday i found out that my ex boyfriend just got asked out by someone else. i asked him out about four or five days before he went out with the other girl. and i definetly know that it isn't fair. also he dumped me for no stupid reason. now my question is what should i do about this other than talking to him? should i ask him out again or should i try talking to him more and more?? sorry it is so so so so long.. ha ha

You just have to get over him. You want to wast your breath over this guy who isn't fair?
Or if he wants to make you jealous, give him the satisfaction he wants?

No, you have to just get over this guy and move on.

~kooka

Q: I had something about this about 2-3 months ago.

I have this huge cat scratch on my nose & its just in 2 lines... I think its scared... but I was wondering how I could get rid of this scar & how long it would take?

thanks!

I know there are some creams that can reduce scaring. It will go away after while on it's own. Unless it's really really deep.

If it's a light scar probably a week or two, and the deeper it is the longer it will take to heal.

For now i would just cover it up with cover up.

hope it goes away soon
~kooka

Q: Im just wondering, this is a quick question. I slept over my new friends house. Shes extremely pretty, rich, but shes diabetic and she smells like fish. Badly. I know she sprays perfume down there, she's told me. But she cannot find a way to get rid of the smell. What should I tell her as advice?

Does she want your advice? you may hurt her feelings if you start giving her advice that she might be kind of senstive about.

I tried looking this up and i couldn't find any thing. have you tried google? try it and see if there is anything she can do.

~kooka

Q: ok me n this guy are best friends but i really like him and he knows it....one time we were talking and i told him i still liked him and he said he was afraid of loosing the friendship we have so we hadnt talked about it for a while but now its summer and we always said we would go out during summer...but a while back i got fed up with waiting on him and dicided to just be his friend but inside i knew i will never be able to not love him like more then a friend ...so anyway i was almost over him and i went to camp for a week and right when i got home he called and was like i really missed you love you ...and tonight we were going to do somthing but i couldnt so he went over to another firnds house but he promised he wouldnt do anything with anyother girls ... does this mean he likes me ?? i hopw i made sence lol
thanks and ill rate=D

yah sure. I mean just because he went over to someones house dosn't meen he's going to do anything.

I think you should be really craeful with this relationship. I went out with my life long friend and out friendship (now that we have brocken up) will never be the same.

Another friend of mine went out with a guy friend and went out so long so that when they broke up it ended up being a love hate relationship. So just be careful, you want to make sure that if things don't work out, you can still be friends.

I'm sure he likes you alot and I think you should give it a try.
~kooka

Q: okay so i'm a 14/f, and i'm really into my best friends brother. they are step brother and sister, so they are the same age and in the same school, since they live together. her brother and i talk, and we don't like each other, but we just both think each other is attractive. my friend is getting very angry at the fact that i talk to her brother. i don't see why she is so mad - but she is almost forcing us to not talk to him. how can i confront her about this? i really want to continue talking to him and just treat him as another one of my friends - but my best friend is telling me that i'm going to far. what can i do to help the situation?

To you it may look like your just hanging out, but to your friend, it may look like more. Sit her down and talk to her. Be strong, but not over powerful. Don't back down when she accuses you of things but don't be pushy.

You may even get her step brother to talk to her too. I'm sure in the end you'll all be fine. And if you must try to hang out with her step brother on your own time and with out her. But not all the time because then she might think you are ditching her.

hope this all gets better
~kooka

bio

I am a 14 year old girl in a big city. I live off other peoples drama so i end up giving alot of advice. Love vargas girls, knitting and many other things. Feel free to write me any time at kooka_burra@hotmail.com