All advice is an opinion. I'll give you my honest opinion based on what information you give me.
Gender: Female
Location: Oklahoma
Occupation: student
Age: 21
Member Since: March 24, 2009
Answers: 99
Last Update: June 15, 2009
Visitors: 11210
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i need to get over my ex. we dated for 9 months and he was my first love. he broke up with me on sunday but said he wanted to hang out alot over the summer and maybe if that spark came and fate brought us together we would date again but theres a really small chance so he told me to not get my hopes up. however i still want to stay really good friends with him, and he does too and he says he loves me more than a friend but not enough to be in a relationship with (can anyone explain that?) so my questions are
A.) how do i get over him?
B.) is there possibly ANYTHING i can do to reproduce that spark over the summer and remind him why he fell for me in the first place? (we also met during the summer of last year and started dating towards the end of the summer)
C.) what does he mean when he says he loves me more than a friend but not enough to be in a relationship with (like a protective brother?)
thanks soo much.
16/f (link)
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A) I'm not sure how you get over him, but it does not involve hanging out with him all summer or trying to reproduce a spark. There's really no reason for you to wait around for him if he's not waiting around for you. I don't know if it's possible for the two of you to be friends. You can try. Occasionally, it does happen. But in order to remain friends, it has to be a situation where neither of you is bitter about the breakup.
B) There may or may not be anything you can do to reproduce said "spark". However, there's no point in trying if he doesn't want to. You don't want to try to drag him back into a relationship unwillingly. It'll only be bad in the end.
C)I don't mean for this to sound harsh, but my guess is that it means he wants you to wait around for him. It's quite possible that it means he does not want to date you, but doesn't want to see you date someone else. Perhaps he's not sure if he's making a mistake, and wants to make sure you'll be around if he changes his mind. That's just one theory, and I have no idea if it's anything close to right. If he actually SAID the "protective brother" thing, that is a little weird. That is kind of like saying he doesn't want to get back with you. If you say someone is like a sibling, that puts them "off limits".
A lot of this is just guesses, and may be incorrect. I only say it to give you some ideas. The only way you can really know is by talking to him more.
And about the prom thing. You should just do what he says. By that, I mean, if he says you're going as friends act like his friend. If he says differently, then you know you can act on that. That way, you're respecting him, and not crossing any boundaries. In that way, you're respecting yourself.
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This is a letter that I wrote to him that I'm never going to send. It sums it up: (sorta long):
I don't know what to say. I don't know now, and I won't know tomorrow, just as I didn't know yesterday. I walk dutifully to the school everyday. I look for you, just to see you laughing, just to see you smile, just to see you talk, just to watch you warm my day. Yet, you never notice me. That one class is my exception. You sit right there, in front of me, walking perfection, yet I'm the only one who sees it. Kind to everyone, serious and smart, yet funny and sporty. Even, nice to me, the one who just sits there, who's NOT funny, and has little outer beauty. I could only hope that you would look at me. Yet, you do. Just seeing you keeps my hopes up. But I know you don't feel the same way.
Everyone has those times. You know, the awkward 5th grade years where you have a 'crush,' then 2 weeks later its someone else. I've been through it. I know what it feels like. But this is different. I'm head over heels, 100% in love with you. And its different from anything I'm used to.
Yeah, sure, you talk to me, to ask me about a science question, or if I know when the tests are. At least you know me. But I can't help to wonder that if you knew me better, you might actually like me. Outside of me- the crazy girl with skin problems on her forehead and chin, the one with the goofy smile that never goes away, the one that people say "Oh, I'm glad I'm not her" behind my back to- I'm typical. But inside, it's different. Oh lord, its different. Inside, I'm athletic, I love animals, I have 2 gerbils I adore, I do dance, I'm obsessed about clothing, and I'm afraid of weird things- like sitting on the outsides of places and golf. I'm beautiful on the inside, but my outside is warring with my inside. Maybe, I could be pretty, if my face healed, and I slapped on some make-up. Maybe, you could get to know me more.
I know you're not the type to judge by the outside, but I know your type. You like the sporty, funny, outgoing kind. I met your ex, and she's perfect. I'm sporty, I just don't want people to know. It's not what they would expect. I'm outgoing, people just look at me and shrug me off. And, I'm sarcastically funny. But people, again, wouldn't expect it. I keep me inside, I'm imperfect in every way.
You, on the other hand, are perfect in every way. You're out of my league. You're out of my reach. And I hate it.
If you were to see this, maybe you'd look at me differently. Maybe you would try to get to know me, instead of brushing me past like any other girl. Maybe, just maybe, you'd like me for once. (link)
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I hate when people say somebody is out of someone's league. There are no leagues. Contrary to popular belief, dating is nothing like baseball. One person may run with a different social circle than another one, which makes dating more difficult, but it doesn't make it impossible. On the other hand, I know how easy it is to get wrapped up in some guy and think he is so much better than he really is. I'm not saying he's a bad guy, but you deserve better than to think about some guy all day if he doesn't think about you.
It seems like you know that you're an interesting and worthwhile person, but it seems like you're still a bit insecure. That is the most important thing for you to work on right now. You need to feel better about yourself. If you do, the "guy problems" become easier.
This might sound absurd, but we actually teach others how they should treat us by the way we treat ourselves. If you act like you are a great catch and any guy would be lucky to date you, there's a good chance that a lot of guys will believe you! If you act like no guy would ever want to date you, no guy will. I'm not saying you need to be vain and conceited. You don't want to try to be a completely different person. You just need to be yourself and be happy with yourself. Your happiness is way more important than this guy.
One more thing: Don't compare yourself to his ex. Comparison is the thief of joy! You are unique. Celebrate it. You don't need to emulate anyone, you just need to show the world how cool you already are.
I hope this helps, and that I wasn't too far in left field (again with the baseball references!). Take care. --NoCandy
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I am a 50+ female and I need ideas on how to respond politely to people who disrespect our President by calling him the N word. I get angrier every time I hear it and one of these days I'm going to blow like dynomite. (link)
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It is infuriating. I commend you for wanting to be polite. I think the best course of action would be to ask them why. Ask them why they feel that way about President Barack Obama. Ask them why they think it is acceptable to use that word and what they think it means. The reason I tell you to ask them these questions is because they will not have a logical explanation. Chances are they will get angry if you ask them questions, but stay as calm as possible. They get angry because they don't want to admit that they are wrong. The only thing you can do is point out the error in (or lack of) logic. In the end, you may not be able to change their views, and you may not be able to make them realize that what they are saying is wrong, but you will know that you are right and you did all you could to try to make them see the error of their ways. Some people will be stubborn and ignorant until they die. It doesn't mean they are terrible people, they just might not know any better. Good luck, and I hope you feel better.
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I have an acting audition on wednesday. What are some songs that will give you confidence? (link)
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The best answer I can come up with is "preparation". If you know that you are prepared for the audition, that should help you feel confident. I know this might sound odd, but I like to stretch before an audition or do some yoga to relax. That way my body is not tense, so I don't get nervous. Different things work for different people, but the more prepared you are, the better you'll feel. Just practice more than you think you should. Break a leg. --NoCandy
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I am tired of embarrassing myself. I just had a thought. How do you know when you know someone and they want to be your friend. Does it just click or do you look for signals. I don't want to be like looking at someone like hang out with me. When they are like "what are you looking at?" It makes me look dumb. (link)
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Making new friends can be tough. It comes easier for some people than for others. If you're like some people who have difficulty making friends, you worry about saying the wrong thing, embarrassing yourself, and if they won't like you. You can't make friends by being shy and hiding your personality. You just have to put yourself out there. Talk about what you like. Tell some jokes. Ask them questions about themselves (what kind of music do you like? Seen any good movies lately? What do you like to do in your spare time?). Just be yourself, outwardly, because if they aren't going to like you, they aren't going to like you. But if you keep quiet and don't share your personality with the world, people who would like you might not ever know that they would. I hope this helps. --Nocandy
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Ok heres what happened. I got a detention from getting 3 citations for forgetting my book. My mom can be strict about school things. i got a detention form and hid it in my backpack. with a smirk on my face ( bad choice ) i told her i got 3 citations and might get a detention.( already did ) she got super mad and i started arguing about how iv only gotten one in 2 yrs. she said if i bring a detention form home im gonna get grounded for two weeks. PLEASE HELP. thanks. (link)
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From what I understand, you already got detention, and if your mom finds out, you will be grounded for two weeks. However, I think it would be worse to hide it from her. Perhaps you should apologize and tell her you'll try not to let it happen again. If you hide it from her, you'll probably get in more trouble. Your mom is punishing you because she loves you and wants you to do well in school. The grown-up thing to do would be to take the punishment and just deal with being grounded for two weeks. In fact, if you're really good about it, she might decide two weeks is a little long and let you out of it early. Some parents do that. I know this probably isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's my opinion of what would be best. Two weeks isn't really that long. Good luck. -- Nocandy
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I have like a day to chose which university to accept and it is totally freaking me out. I got into some pretty good schools so I should be happy, but instead every time I think about next year I start crying.
It's gotten to the point where I'm worrying about everything and anything.
First of all, I really like visual art and want to make it into a career somehow, but am not sure I like design. I am wondering if I should go to an art school where I can find this out, or go to a more general university where I can explore other options that I know I like (ie liberal art courses I am interested in, like studies in gender, feminism, labour laws, ect.). Another option I had thought about was doing theatre design/backstage theatre as I have done it in school and for a small theatre company and really enjoyed it. However, the place I am looking at for theatre doesn't have fine art or even design.
Another thing I am worried about is how I should approach this dilemma. Is it better to go to a really good general university to "find yourself", or figure out a career choice and then try to get training for it? Is it better to pick the field you are most likely to get your ideal job in, or go into your favourite subject and hope it works itself out?
18/f and totally confused. It's okay if you only answer part of this question... My mind is likely making this decision way harder than it really is by tying itself into knots =/
(link)
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Boy, have I been there! Sometimes it seems like you're under so much pressure to make the right decision RIGHT now, or you'll lose opportunities. The choice is ultimately up to you. Personally, I went to a general university right out of high school. I don't regret it. Most freshmen go through a lot of changes their first year. It is very likely that you'll learn things about yourself and about life that will help you make those decisions. Also, if you start taking general education courses and change your mind about where you want to go to school, you can always transfer. Well, in many cases, you can.
I wish I could help you with the career advice, but I'm still a student myself. I'm actually a theatre major myself, and I very much love designing costumes and makeup for the stage. I think that someday I might go to graduate school somewhere that has a masters specifically for design. Is graduate school something you would be interrested in someday?
Just don't worry that you are going to lose all the opportunities you have just by making a choice. If you make a choice and feel you've made the wrong one, you still have options. I wish you luck, and I hope you have a good Freshman year.
--NoCandy
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so im 5'3, 17 years old, 120 pounds. im trying to get to about 115. anyways, ive been doing cardio almost everyday probably 6 days a week, and lifting weights about 2 days a week. i eat about 1400 calories a day. sometimes at night i cant sleep ill be rolling around in bed for about an hour seriously it sucks. so ill get up and watch a little tv and eat a snack. usually something about 200 calories worth. then about an hour later ill finally beable to fall asleep. is this okay? will i still lose weight or will this make me gain weight? this has been happening about twice a week lately.. i really want to lose this 5pounds quick and im working out a lot so i wouldnt think this should affect it much but what do you guys think?
also what are some tips of foods to eat to lose this 5 pounds of fat fast ? (link)
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Eating 200 extra calories shouldn't keep you from losing weight if you are only eating 1400. That's still a total of 1600, which is a lot less than the average body burns in a day, especially if you're exercising. Maybe that's your body's way of telling you that you need to be eating a little more. I don't think there are any foods that actually "burn fat". The only foods I know of that will make your body lose weight fast do so because they have a diuretic effect, meaning they rid your body of excess water. Squeezing a bit of lemon juice in a glass of water makes a natural diuretic. Asparagus is a natural diuretic. Other than that, the best method for losing weight is always the good old-fashioned eat-less and exercise-more routine, which you are already doing. If you keep it up, you should lose 5 pounds in a reasonable amount of time. I know the temptation to lose it fast is always there, but it's better if you lose it slowly because it is much easier to keep off, and you're much more likely to keep it off. I hope this helps.
--NoCandy
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Why do I,&&alot of other people, look different in pictures then in the mirror?
What do we truly look like,
Tha mirrors image or the cameras?
I would think
the mirrors image is what we truly look
like because, when you see sum1 in person
and then look at that same person in a mirror,
they look the same.. right?
but,
I was reading stuff on google && alot of people
think the cameras more truthful because what
we see in the mirror is reversed..
Soo whats your opinion???
Srry just a curious young female tryin
to geta answer..haha ;] (link)
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A picture can give you an angle that a mirror cannot. You also get the whole picture because it is on a much smaller scale, and you can look at your whole self at once. When you look in a mirror, you kind of have to move your eyes around and scan from top to bottom because you have to be close enough to see yourself. On the other hand, you can also take pictures from deceptive angles. You can position a person's body in a way that makes them look thinner, and take the picture from a certain, more flattering angle. So cameras can be both very accurate and very deceptive at the same time. Some women have a tendency to stand in a different way in front of the mirror that might be more flattering, but do not carry this better posture throughout the day. So if you snapped a random photo of them, they probably wouldn't be standing up straight, so they wouldn't look as good as they thought they did in the mirror. For these reasons I think photographs are more accurate. This is how it seems to me.
--NoCandy
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I'll keep this one short and sweet. I am a fourteen-year-old freshman girl. Well, I have a friend who apparently is bi-sexual, and asked out one of his friends who is a boy, and the friend said he didn't want to spoil their friendship, so it was dropped. But then, about a month later, my friend asked me out. Should I be insulted? I mean, I am in no way against gays or anything, but it is a little... I don't know. I do dress kind of boyish I will admit. I dress in zip-up hoodies that I find on sale in the men’s department, but I didn't know it was THAT bad. Should I take a hint, and change myself? Or, am I just over reacting?? Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for the help! :) (link)
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There is absolutely no reason for which you should be insulted. If anything, you should be flattered. It's just one more person who thinks you're a catch. You should not be prejudice against him because he "apparently is bi-sexual". Even if lesbians started hitting on you, you shouldn't be insulted. You should be yourself. I understand why you wouldn't want to date a bisexual guy, but it certainly doesn't mean that straight guys don't find you attractive.
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I like a dude, and I'm a nerd. (He knows I like him by the way.) How do I get the guy to notice and/or like me? Thanks. :) (link)
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You have to have the right attitude, and by attitude I mean lots of self-confidence. You say you're a "nerd", but there's no reason to slap a label on yourself. You're just as cool as anyone else. You should be able to just strike up a conversation with him. Think of it like making friends. If you don't have problems making friends with "dudes" then it shouldn't be a problem. Just tell yourself that you're just trying to make a friend, and act like you would making a new friend who is a guy, or even a new friend who is a girl. Don't act too interested. You say he knows you like him, but you have to make him wonder.
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my boyfriend just broke up with me because he didn't want relationship stress but told me he wanted to be my best friend but it would take some time obviously for me to get over him. my prom is in 2 weeks and i have this friend that doesn't have a date. he's a really fun guy and id have fun with him but im worried ill ruin his night because i won't stop thinking about my ex boyfriend during slow songs and stuff. my ex boyfriend said he would still go with me and i still hope for that small chance he'll fall for me again and realize he made a mistake of breaking up with me...who do you think i should bring? (link)
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I went to the senior prom with my ex boyfriend, and it was horrible. We were best friends before we dated, and for some reason thought it was possible to be best friends afterward. He said we'd go as friends and it would be okay, but it wasn't. It was terribly awkward all night and he kept hanging on me like he was putting on a show to make people think we were still together. I ended up hanging out with my girlfriends, while he ended up saying nasty things about me to his guy buddies.
I know everyone's situation is different, but from personal experience, I think you should go with your friend. You should have fun and just forget about your ex. When you catch yourself feeling sad, don't allow it. Just say "this is my prom and I came here to have a good time, so that's what I'm going to do."
If your ex is going to realize he made a mistake and want you back, he's going to do it, but you shouldn't have to do anything to make him realize it. Maybe seeing you having fun without him will make him jealous and realize he misses you. I don't know.
In the end it's up to you to decide who you'd like to go with. But if you think there's a chance your ex could ruin your big night, don't go with him.
Hope you fun at your prom... that's what they're for! --NoCandy
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okay well i used to think mastubating was so bad and "god" would punish me for doing it-crazy things like god taking away my personality or something like that. So i stopped. But now my views are different, such as i don't believe in the bible let alone the god people say there is. I mean, i believe theres a higher power- like a force of the universe- but not at all that its going to punish me. And besides, i'm a good person, so why should masturbating make me a bad person? I think they'res nothing wrong with doing it now-but after doing it those feelings of "he's going to take this or that away from me" still come up? I mean, i was raised catholic and i am being forced to go to confirmation-but i don't believe in any of it.Even if there is a god, i wouldn't think of him/her as this menace that gives humans rules to live by. Saying being gay is a sin, girls can't get there periods- it just isn't what i think this so called god would make you do.I think he would be more a best and trusted friend who loves you no matter what.(i very SLIGHTLY believe in him/her.hardly.) So back to my question- If i don't exactly believe in the catholic god,and don't consider myself catholic in any way- why do i still feel like he or she's going to "punish" me for mastubating?! I feel guilty? any help on this? thanks. (link)
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I could tell you were raised Catholic before you even said so. It's understandable why you feel that way, because it's been drilled into your head your entire life by your family and the church. It will take a while for those feelings to dissipate, but they will fade away if you work at it. I'm assuming since you're being "forced" to go to confirmation, you're not eighteen yet and still live with your parents. This will be a lot easier when you grow up and move out of your parents' house. Then you won't be subject to their will. You could try out some protestant churches of varying denominations who might view God as more of a friend who loves you no matter what. You could even attend a non-denominational church.
In the mean time, however, you do have to deal with your parents. How to do this depends on what kind of parents they are. Are they understanding, and will they listen to you if you tell them how you feel, or will they dismiss your concerns immediately and tell you to go to the Catholic church or else? Try talking to them about your concerns. If it doesn't work and they won't budge, be patient. When you are out on your own you can go to whatever church you want or not at all.
In the mean time, with the guilty feelings just keep telling yourself you're not wrong. Listen to people who tell you you're not wrong. Masturbation is natural. Everyone does it. Your priest does it. Anyone who says they don't/haven't is lying. You shouldn't feel guilty.
Good luck with this, and I hope it works out for you. Also, I hope you stop feeling those guilty feelings, because they really are not good for you.
-NoCandy
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i have been outside like everday and i can't get a taN!!! what are some tips to get a tan??? (link)
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It always depends on your skin type, and you want to be careful of course when tanning because of the risk of skin cancer. However, if you are having trouble getting tan, you can use a tanning accelerator. There are different accelerators for indoor and outdoor tanning, so make sure you get the outdoor one if you're trying to tan outside. Accelerators come in oils and lotions, and there are many different brands of varying price range. Some of them have an SPF factor, but don't let that scare you off. They block the harmful rays of the sun, but you will still get a tan. Other than that, be careful and do your best not to get a sunburn. Good luck and be careful out there!
-NoCandy
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I'm 21 years old, female, and hovering between 240 and 250 lbs. Size 16, if that helps... so it sits pretty okay on me, but I'm not happy with it.
I was always really fit in high school, always around 180 lbs of pure muscle (I actually hold a black belt in karate), and even after starting university I managed to avoid the freshman 15. However, I went through a very stressful time in my life, and ended up gaining about 70 lbs over the course of 2 years. In the past couple of summers, I have managed to lose 30 or 40 lbs with relative ease, but as soon as I'm back at home, I gain it all back.
This summer, I'm living in my own house, and my husband will be gone for 4 months (he's with the military). I'm thinking that this is a good time to really tackle my weight before it tackles me.
First off, I already do not eat junk food. My problem is too much healthy food if anything. I don't eat fried food and rarely eat sweets. My sweets, when I do eat them, are generally something like a slice of homemade banana bread, or a small piece of dark chocolate. I try to control my portions, but always end up hungry again. I drink nothing but water and the occasional diet, caffeine free soda. I get out for walks regularly, and ride a bicycle to and from work. I've just started up with seeing a trainer a few times a week, but that will only last about a month due to financial constraints. I have a gym membership, too.
The way I see it, I need to lose between 80 and 100 lbs. I'm not planning to do it in one summer, but I figure that while I am bored I will be able to take a good crack at it and get a start.
Any tips on how to lose it and keep it off? I feel like I'm doing the right things, but it never seems to work. It's like my metabolism is stuck.
Also, if anyone out there needs to lose a similar amount of weight, I would love to have a weight loss buddy. All my friends are in the 120-150 range, so they don't really have the same sort of weight loss goals as me. (link)
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If there are 3500 calories in a pound of fat, and you want to lose two pounds per week, you would have to burn 7000 more calories than you consume per week, which works out to 1000 calories a day. If your body burns 2,800 per day, you would need to eat 1,800 calories per day. However, if you exercised enough to burn 200 calories you could eat 2,000 calories per day.
The reason I say this is because that sounds a lot like me sometimes. I'm 21, and I live a reasonably healthy lifestyle. I eat healthier than all of my friends, and I exercise regularly. I fluctuate between 180 and 215, but lately I've been stuck around 205. I'm usually a size 16, but right now I'm in an 18... except that I don't carry it well because I'm short and have a petite frame under all the extra weight. When I am able to lose weight, I have to count calories in order to do it. I have to count every day, and I have to be very disciplined about it. I don't seem to lose weight or keep it off without counting. Plus, I have a tendency to eat too little and sabotage myself because I can't keep up the pace.
If you don't mind having a weight loss buddy over the internet you can check out the site www.SparkPeople.com. They have forums, lots of articles to read, a nutrition tracker, a fitness tracker, recipes, recipe calculators, and groups you can join. Another fitness tracker can be found at www.thedailyplate.com. I like this tracker better, but I like the community at SparkPeople better.
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well me and my boyfriend are going to try to have a baby soon and we are looking for some cute, unique names. now so far i have chosen names like Braylin/Braylyn for a girl and for a boy all of the Aidin names.. now so far my favorite names have been Zaidin, i dont want aidin by its self because my cousin has a little boy named aidin and she has named her newest baby girl Slaydin. so i just want some names that are similar to Zaidin and Braylyn. i do however like the name Braidance i kindof just made it up so please help me find some names! (link)
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I couldn't suggest any names for you, but I can give you some ideas on how to find some names.
1. Talk to your families or find some other way to trace your ancestry. You could join Ancestry.com for a free trial long enough to look at some of the names (just don't forget to cancel it on time if you don't want to pay for it). Find a name from your family or his family tree.
2. Do you have any favorite books or authors? Maybe there was a name of a character in a book that you always loved.
3. Look for names from your heritage or his heritage. If you are of Italian decent, look at Italian names, or if you are of German decent, look up German names. Either find a name you like or look up the meanings of these names and find a meaning that is significant to you.
4. Baby name books or websites. I don't like the idea of picking a name out of a book, but they are helpful even if just to give you some ideas. Websites are full of information too, including origins and meanings of names.
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ok so my school prom is coming up next week. i'm wearing a knee length dress that is black with an electric blue vertical stripe down the center. it has thick satin straps and makes an 'x' in the back. my heels are silver. my hair is up in a curly bun. i'm trying to figure out what accessories would go with this. i'm not a very girly girl, but i want to look really pretty. what kind of necklace, earrings, and/or bracelets should i wear? and what color should i paint my nails? (fingernails and toenails) i keep my nails really short, but i'm not sure if i'm supposed to paint them or what. and also what color corsage would look good with this outfit? my favorite flowers are red roses, but i didn't know if that would go with the dress or not. any help will be awesome; i'm totally clueless! thanks so much! =) (link)
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You don't necessarily have to go for the classic, polished look if you don't want to. A lot of girls these days wear more modern or funky styles to the prom. So it would help to know if you want to look polished and classic or fun and funky, but still formal. Either way, you want to be unique so you don't look like everyone else and you stand out.
A regular french manicure would be nice either way. Your nails will look clean and pretty without being too loud and detracting from everything else. If you want to do something a little different, you could do electric blue tips with just a clear topcoat. The silver and blue might be too much. With silver heals, I'd go with silver accessories, to bring the whole outfit together. You might even find a way to work a silver barrette or comb into your hairstyle, or even a silver tiara. I don't know what kind of accessories you like, but I love vintage and antique jewelry, or just vintage and antique looking costume jewelry. If you like that kind of stuff you could check an antique stores. You might find something unique-- "not like everybody else". But there are lots of creative things you can work into your outfit to stand out. You just have to decide how brave you want to be with it, or if you'd rather just look classically beautiful.
As far as a corsage goes, steer clear of the red roses. They will stick out and not match at all. If you're looking for something more classic, blue and/or white flowers would work. If you're looking for something more trendy, if you could get a blue flower on either black or silver that might look pretty cool. It's hard to tell without seeing the dress, but just stick with your color scheme of black, blue, and silver.
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http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=561630
Well that was the question I submitted before. The thing is that me and this girl used to be good friends until a week ago when I supposedly "played" her friend around. I spoke to her, apologised to her in a large manner (writing a large essay!), she said everything was cool and told me that she's "willing" to talk to me IF I put in the effort, but when we used to talk, our conversations were dry, so I got rather annoyed and told her that "if I'm wasting my time trying to build back this friendship, let me know" and she told me, "there's no point in wasting your time, I don't want to talk to you".
I don't know what to do, I wanna get back with her, but she treats me like shit, so I want to get over her...help? thanks! (link)
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Ultimately, it is your choice whether you get back with her or get over her. If you're going to be with someone you should be with someone who really wants to be with you. There is no point in trying to make someone want you if they don't, because their heart will never be in it. If you got back together, chances are she would still treat you like shit.
Usually when I see a friend get back with an ex in that way, it doesn't work out in the end, and somebody ends up getting hurt for a second time. I actually did it too once upon a time when I was young and stupid, and my ex that I got back with was so completely mean to me. I've never seen somebody get back with their ex and things work out. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but usually they are exes for a reason. Personally, I think you'd be better off to get over this girl. I could be wrong, especially since I am a stranger.
Someday, or maybe even in the near future, you will meet somebody who makes you wonder why you wasted your time with somebody who didn't treat you right. Why waste any more time?
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Okay so my mom and i have always had a semi-close relationship. But she just got a facebook... and she wants me to be her friend on it. I have no problem with the fact she got a facebook, but i kind of need my personal space when it comes to these things. I dont want her to read what i say to my friends and such.... its not that they're bad. It's just that i'm really uncomfortable with it. I told her all of this and she's making me feel extremely guilty, and telling me that i'm SUCH a good daughter for not accepting (sarcasm).
So i really don't know what do do.
Am i horrible for doing this?
What do you guys think?
15/f (link)
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I think she is just teasing you. Do you really think she's serious? Just tell her what you said right there.
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Hi there. I'm an 18/M.
I have a big self esteem problem when it comes to girls. Normally, I am a really confident guy. Not scared to meet new people or speak to large crowds. But I have this problem when it comes to girls. See, when I meet a girl I like, instead of asking her out like a normal person would, I quickly idealize her in my mind to the point where I have convinced myself that she is way too amazing to ever want to talk to me. Then, because I have made her out to be so perfect, flawless, I stay in love with her for a year, or more, until I have completely destroyed my friendship and my chances with the girl. This problem has followed me through 13 years of school.
Now, I'm a Senior. Never had a girlfriend, and I'm doing it again with this amazing girl. How do I fix myself? (link)
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I'm pretty sure most girls want to be treated as your equal. If you like a girl, make friends with her just as you would a guy. Show her respect by getting to know her. Go for girls that have a lot in common with you so that you have plenty to talk about, and have conversations about those common interests. If something besides friendship forms out of that, then go with it. If not, then the two of you just don't have chemistry. But if you keep doing that when you like a girl, eventually you will just hit it off with someone... then who knows what will happen next!
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