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Guy Problems
This is a letter that I wrote to him that I'm never going to send. It sums it up: (sorta long):
I don't know what to say. I don't know now, and I won't know tomorrow, just as I didn't know yesterday. I walk dutifully to the school everyday. I look for you, just to see you laughing, just to see you smile, just to see you talk, just to watch you warm my day. Yet, you never notice me. That one class is my exception. You sit right there, in front of me, walking perfection, yet I'm the only one who sees it. Kind to everyone, serious and smart, yet funny and sporty. Even, nice to me, the one who just sits there, who's NOT funny, and has little outer beauty. I could only hope that you would look at me. Yet, you do. Just seeing you keeps my hopes up. But I know you don't feel the same way.
Everyone has those times. You know, the awkward 5th grade years where you have a 'crush,' then 2 weeks later its someone else. I've been through it. I know what it feels like. But this is different. I'm head over heels, 100% in love with you. And its different from anything I'm used to.
Yeah, sure, you talk to me, to ask me about a science question, or if I know when the tests are. At least you know me. But I can't help to wonder that if you knew me better, you might actually like me. Outside of me- the crazy girl with skin problems on her forehead and chin, the one with the goofy smile that never goes away, the one that people say "Oh, I'm glad I'm not her" behind my back to- I'm typical. But inside, it's different. Oh lord, its different. Inside, I'm athletic, I love animals, I have 2 gerbils I adore, I do dance, I'm obsessed about clothing, and I'm afraid of weird things- like sitting on the outsides of places and golf. I'm beautiful on the inside, but my outside is warring with my inside. Maybe, I could be pretty, if my face healed, and I slapped on some make-up. Maybe, you could get to know me more.
I know you're not the type to judge by the outside, but I know your type. You like the sporty, funny, outgoing kind. I met your ex, and she's perfect. I'm sporty, I just don't want people to know. It's not what they would expect. I'm outgoing, people just look at me and shrug me off. And, I'm sarcastically funny. But people, again, wouldn't expect it. I keep me inside, I'm imperfect in every way.
You, on the other hand, are perfect in every way. You're out of my league. You're out of my reach. And I hate it.
If you were to see this, maybe you'd look at me differently. Maybe you would try to get to know me, instead of brushing me past like any other girl. Maybe, just maybe, you'd like me for once.
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Alright young girl, seems like you are in 5th grade and I think I have got what you are trying to express. Believe me, your letter does not sound like being written by a 5th grade student. It seems to be written by someone who is much matured, who is truely and purely in love, and someone who knows what true love is. Your writing skill is reallly good if not fantastic. If I were to send such a letter to a girl I like, I wouldn't mind it because the letter is beautifully written. Let's come to the point now. Since you are in 5th grade, it is very likely you will have a crash on somebody almost every 2 weeks and then it is someone else (as you mentioned). I say this despite you mentioning your love for him is different, 100% true, and it is not a temporary crash on someone. Well, at your age you are going through physiological and emotional changes and your emotions are running high. That is why your innocent thoughts are perhaps making you feel you are in love with him. I think you should calm yourself down, wait a bit longer, and you will come to understand life better. You should wait until you are matured enough (I am not trying to be harsh on you and I respect your innocent thoughts). Looking at the way you have written this letter it appears to me you are a very nice and honest person and please keep this up. I believe if you think so honestly you will get an excellent person as your life partner when you get older. Coming to your physical appearance, please respect yourself, there is a beautiful person inside you. God created you exactly the way he wanted to. It really does not matter whether you have a goofy smile or what people say about you behind your back. If they are making fun of your physical appearance it is there and solely their problem since they are insulting the creation of God and in that sense they are insulting God. God will take care of those who insult Him. If only they knew it! There is actually no war between your outside and inside. Your inside represents the true you. People with wrong judgment are making you to think about your outside. If people say, "Oh, I'm glad I'm not her", you should say "Thank God! You are not mine! I don't want someone like you who judges a person only from outside!.” You are beautiful from inside and that is enough. That is the real and most precious beauty. God and people with right judgment will judge you based on that; not based on how you look from outside. If people look at you and shrug you off that is their problem since they don't know how judge a person. You should not be bothered about people with judgmental errors. You say you are imperfect in every way, well; we all are imperfect in every way. Otherwise we all would have become angels. You think that guy in your class is perfect in every way but I think none of us are perfect (as I said before). In summary, the beautiful soul inside you represents the true you. God is going to judge you based on your deeds surely NOT based on how you look, how many boyfriends you were able to make, or how many of them were beyond your reach. I hope you understand. God bless you.
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Well your first problem is that your telling yourself that your not perfect and that your hiding yourself because you dont want people to see the real you. Thats wrong if he got to know you he probably would like you.
Show your true colors. Surprise people there is no point in hiding. If you like this guy as much as you say you do, then change be who you really are. Dont hide, be outgoing be you. People will like you i promise.
It sounds like you really like him and you want him to like you to. Well talk to him, make the first move in flirting, just be slow about it.
But most of all HAVE CONFIDENCE in yourself!!! i promise walk around telling yourself that your beautiful. Guys will notice =]
Hope i helped and good luck =]
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I hate when people say somebody is out of someone's league. There are no leagues. Contrary to popular belief, dating is nothing like baseball. One person may run with a different social circle than another one, which makes dating more difficult, but it doesn't make it impossible. On the other hand, I know how easy it is to get wrapped up in some guy and think he is so much better than he really is. I'm not saying he's a bad guy, but you deserve better than to think about some guy all day if he doesn't think about you.
It seems like you know that you're an interesting and worthwhile person, but it seems like you're still a bit insecure. That is the most important thing for you to work on right now. You need to feel better about yourself. If you do, the "guy problems" become easier.
This might sound absurd, but we actually teach others how they should treat us by the way we treat ourselves. If you act like you are a great catch and any guy would be lucky to date you, there's a good chance that a lot of guys will believe you! If you act like no guy would ever want to date you, no guy will. I'm not saying you need to be vain and conceited. You don't want to try to be a completely different person. You just need to be yourself and be happy with yourself. Your happiness is way more important than this guy.
One more thing: Don't compare yourself to his ex. Comparison is the thief of joy! You are unique. Celebrate it. You don't need to emulate anyone, you just need to show the world how cool you already are.
I hope this helps, and that I wasn't too far in left field (again with the baseball references!). Take care. --NoCandy
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