I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
Gender: Male
Member Since: December 31, 2006
Answers: 3591
Last Update: August 30, 2022
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I have a bestfriend and I feel he's slowly drifting away. We graduated and he told me we would be bestfriends forever, and he still checked up on me, and he still meets me regularly, but once i see him enjoying with his other friends, he feels so distant... I want our relationship to be kept... how (link)
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There is NOTHING wrong with your friendship except for your creating an issue in your mind that there is. You can bet he's not worrying about you. Would he meet with you regularly if there were? What more do you want from him or anyone?
When you start at a new school, job or enter post-secondary education it's a whole new world. He's meeting new people and is free to hang out with them alone or with you. It changes nothing and the novelty of always being with new people wears off.
The thing is he probably hasn't told or shown you that your behavior is pissing him off. I hate to be blunt but it is. He can sense or see the jealousy hence seeming distant. He also may have a lot of stuff he deals with privately that could also make him seem distant.
I would calm down, stop worrying and just enjoy the time he spends with you and focus on being in the moment with him. Let all the other pieces fall where they may and if you wind up best-friends forever great. But you won't if you operate from jealousy.
My suspicion is you are female and I may be wrong but your real issue may be that you have romantic feelings for him and they aren't known to him. That's where jealousy may come from. If you have been friends for a very long time get this stuff out. Find out where you stand and clear air about misunderstanding. You'll continue driving yourself nuts if you don't.
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Ok before every metal head runs in to correct me, I'm talking about bands like Peirce the Veil, Alesana, and Asking Alexandria as screamo. And screamo is the most understood term so deal with it. Anyway I'm wondering how to write a screamo song, and what makes a band screamo? (link)
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Ask yourself what makes you a fan of a certain group or a particular song? The problem here is not how or what to write. You have to go with what you know makes for a perfect song in this genre and mirror it.
I may not be a heavy-metal head or fan but I know one thing. Every song out there that anyone has ever identified with has wha is called a hook. It's either a lyric, beat, chorus or rythem (a bass line even)that grabs you by the nose and sucks you in. Something memorable and identified as that artist.
Write the song that you yourself would actually want to listen to. Even if it doesn't turn out to be excactly what you wanted keep going. In the process you will learn the components that make a song what it is and how to write in your own style.
In your mind you already know what makes for a good "screamo" song or a band "screamo" and really it's your opinion tha matters over all because if you asked that question to other people the views would be quite different.
The thing to do is just write.
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Hi so i am 16 yrs...i am female.i rarely have friends that are girls... my closest friend is a guy, i will call him Mike. Mike hangs out with a guy(lets call him Sam) .The three of us have most of our classes together and on evenings we go to a public place to study. To be honest Sam and i had not be really close until a year ago. Before he would talk to this girl named Liah. It turn out though that liah had a bf and like Sam... Last week liah and her bf broke up and she had an arguement with Sam..so they dont talk as much.
I told Mike that i liked Sam and i was going to tell him in a year or so because i was afraid since Liah liked him. Then recently mike told sam that i liked him and he was friendzoning me. i didnt know all that had occurred because at school Sam talked to me normal but then he started talking to girls at school ,hugging them and acting like he is trying to get someone and i should step back. When Mike ,Sam and i are in a group he rarely talk to me sometimes but then he is his normal self.i am confused and i feel uncomfortable around him.i want to tell him that i didnt tell Mike to him and that i was just crushing on him and didnt want anything more but my brother said he thinks Sam likes me and he told Mike something but Mikd hasnt tell me.Also Mike said it was a good thing to tell Sam and he had to... (link)
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If you like someone and want to be clear about where you stand and signals you may or may not be getting from them you have to go to the source. Ask to speak to him about something and just do it. Don't think about it but actually do it and find out. Otherwise you are spinning your wheels and in turmoil in your mind all the time. All he say is he is or isn't interested. Unless he's a prick which I doubt life would go on believe me and a frienship that was already solidified arguments or not would continue and evolve. Not much risked for possible big gain.
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I'm not going to ask for answers or anything, it's just that I have a tendency to leave homework till the last minute and it happened again today. I have a lab report for science due tomorrow. I really don't understand what to do for the questions, they don't specify how to answer. I also forgot to take notes while doing the science experiment so that part is already incomplete. I asked my friends if they understood the questions but none of them have the same teacher as me and they don't have to do the report. My teacher is very strict and I don't want to email her asking for help; she probably wouldn't give me any anyways. What can I do? (link)
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If your teacher is strict imagine how irritated with you they are going to be when you go in the day it's due and tell them you don't understand the assignment.
They would want you to email. After all they gave out their e-mail address for a purpose and this is it. All you have to do is be honest which they will like. Tell them that in general you are highly disorganized and disn't bother to take notes in class and are now paying the price.
Let them know that half of what you were asked to do is incomplete. Then tell them you didn't even look at the assignment until the last minute and only just now realized you were in over your head and didn't get it at all.
Tell them you don't mind what grade they give or if you fail the assignment as long as you get organized and figure out what to do for future assignments and tests. Let them know your friends don't take this class.
They get paid to help you succeed. If they have a bit of attitude about it chalk it up as their normal personality but take any and all help offered. Also, how do you know they won't help you unless you make an effort to ask? You will likely be surprised there. Maybe telling her you're scared of how she would react may help her see how she is coming across to people.
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I am currently going through so much and I am only 18. Everything for me is falling apart, no one cares about me, no one tries to help, and I an so alone. All I can think about is taking my own life. I don't have anyone who will miss me, or anything. I don't have anything to look foward, I just feel like giving up. I've tried so hard to stop thinking about it, but I can't. It's like it's already stuck in my mind. I harm myself every night, in hopes of actually dying but it's not working. I just can't take anything anymore, it hurts to feel so alone, it hurts to be so alone. I want to give up, I want to be gone. I just wish I had someone who cared, someone who loved me. But I don't, and that's driving me towards actually doing what's been on my mind. I don't want to live anymore. I just need advice on what I should do. (link)
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You NEED professional help. The thoughts in your head about suicide and the self-harm you do aren't yours and are not normal. They're trying to convince you that you are worthless and should kill yourself when in fact it's the opposite.
As far as other people go I'm sure that there are a lot of people who do care and do nice things for you. They may not always pat you on the back but they do think good of you.
In the instance where people are harming themselves or trying to die it's considered a mental disturbance and may be because of a greater illness driving the whole thing. As much as you are scared and don't want to do this you need to tell an adult you trust about these thoughts and self-harm and that you cannot stop it nore the voices in your head.
What must happen next for your safety is to go to any emergency room. Don't hold anything back and have them tell you why you have these urges, feelings, desires. They will treat you and help you get back to valuing yourself among other things and control the disturbance and figure out if you are depressed or something different.
When people want to harm themselves or die the hospital by law keeps them 72 hours for observation. Don't be scared of that because all it means is that you are getting help and having a rest from everything going on and getting well. You can see your family and go about activities and interacting with other people. You just can't be at home until then until they figure out the help you will need.
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Hello!
As the headline says, im trying to be a better man, and being able to do some self defense is never bad idea. I heared that some martial arts are tied with some sort of philosophy and through it teaching other things for life then just "beating people" (because beating people is NOT my desire in the first place). I will be most grateful if you give me any suggestions i could follow.
Thank you! (link)
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Almost all martial arts instructors will insist thst you never use what is taught unless somebody attacks you. Some are tied to different philosophies but you need not be. That part is a waste of time. Be courteous of the beliefs and superstitions but you need not adopt them yourself
. No two martial arts facilities are the same nor do they teach the same style. What you neeed to avoid are places that are obsessed with katas and traditional karate. You need MMA and the ability to spar with boxing gloves and gear in order to handle anything in real life situations. Learning take downs is essential. Brazilian Jui-Jitsu or kick boxing is something to look into. Taekwondo is something where they expect every move to be exact. The way they kick is very different than any other martial art.
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why did lacey gareson leave roseanne (link)
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She left for University to earn a degree.
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I have poor credit. I am looking to get a smile loan to help me with moving finances at the end of September. I have no idea how to tell which company is honest or just a scam. I would appreciate some help being pointed in the right direction. (link)
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Taking out another loan will only add to credit issues and debt if you qualify. What I would do is tell your parents what you are in debt for and mention you cannot move on your own.
Next find out from a bankruptcy lawyer what you should do about the debt you have. If it is under $3000 to $4000 ignore the calls, threats and letters from collection agencies. Why? You never know when you'll geta job or enough to pay it off. Bankruptcy leads to 7 years of bad credit. Also never tell them you'll pay it by a certain time if you don't know you can. It gives them by law another 2 years they can go after you.
It is best to consult your parents about your debt and have them figure out what to do and how to move you even as a lease co-signer. The losn companies likely are legit but not to be dealt with as it is one more company in debt to that will loan and want back funds at a very high interest rate. I wouldnt do it.
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I have never dated before because I was always to focused on my education *20 year old female. Now I like this guy and he likes me. Problem is I don't understand him. When I give him attention he makes me feel like I'm bothering him. When I ignore him he wants to be clingy. And every time we see each other there is an awkward vibe. He says we need to talk about our relationship because even our friends are confused, but when we are alone he does not want to talk. PLEASE HELP. (link)
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Be blunt and insist on that conversation. Tell him what you said above about nit understanding him. He needs to know how he is coming across sbd you have to know whether to move on. If he cannot do that with you than forget it and him. You would only run up against constant indifference and mindgames. He appears not sure in imself let alone you to be brutally honest and that's not a great foundation for friendship let alone what you hope for with him.
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Hey everyone i just wanna say thanks in advance to anyone who has any helpful suggestions. I am going to college soon and i really am in need of a computer. I have looked on Amazon and best buy. But there's so many out there, that i just don't know what to choose. I want a computer that packs a lot of space and has a good hard drive. That won't slow down when i have alot of things on it. I'd really prefer a laptop with: a webcam,maybe one that can turn into a tablet,and a disk tray,id really like one with a light up keyboard. But overall it doesn't have to have all of that (it'd be a bonus) but overall i want a great computer that will last. Also I'd prefer it to be cheap lol but im willing to spend $200-500 (maybe even to $600 ) thanks again (link)
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Cheap doesn't equal quality the majority of the time. Avoid Dell. Their computers have been garbage in my experience. What you should do is tell your parents what you need and why for college. Put half your money and half their's in to getting something top flight.
If it were me I would purchase the basic model Mac Book. It has everything you need and thensome plus all the features you said you liked. I have one I bought in 2006 still running as my primary machine as fast as when I got it. It's really the computer for the creative type. You don't have to be a designer, photographer, visual artist but this is the computer meant for them. Highly recommend.
If you buy one NEVER go to Best Buy or store like it. Often their sales people don't know beans about Apple. They'll sell you anything. They also try to talk you into their warrenty which is more expensive than Apple's. What you need to do is go to an Apple Store where they won't pressure you and are not on comission. Buy the 3 year Apple Care warrenty for $100. It will give you unlimited tech support 24/7 and repairs. While the price is high the reputation and fact they are built like rocks is worth considering.
If you did go the Windows route I don't advise touch screens or models that function like a computer/tablet hybrid. Lenovo which was IBM puts out decent laptops. One thing to consider about HP is their financial and other problems.
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I don't eat a whole lot,no,im not saying that I starve myself, or anything like that, but I will admit that I don't eat the whole amount that I should, this is due to me not being hungry or whatever, anyway, when I do eat slightly more, my body struggles to keep it down, like It will come back up into my mouth, with out being forced. Why is this? Its sort of happened since I can remember, but recently has become more often.
20/F - vegetarian. (link)
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Please consult a physician who can diagnose and treat this.I know this isn't what you were expecting but nobody here can accurately tell you what you have and root cause. We arent doctors and hazarding a guess would be a diservice or even dangerous.
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Sir,I'm having a cough for about 5 days and I'm coughing followed with a pain on my right chest like blowing up.I was given clamovid by my doctor but there was no improvement. My question is what caused the pain. Thank you. (link)
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You need to book another appointment and telo them this plus the medicine did nothing. They will pinpoint what you have. We cant for we arent doctors.
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I recently had an interview that I thought went really well, at a smaller division of a company that is very successful. This is a position that I really want.
One of the questions that I was asked involved any projects that I may have worked on. I mentioned two of them, but forgot to mention another one that I think could be really helpful with me getting the job.
They already seem mostly impressed with me, but I am nervous because I am about to graduate college in another year and I have never interned before. It seems like, even if I think the interview goes well, I never get the job. So, who I am to say that they're going to offer the position to me?
All of these people seem very friendly, laidback but still professional. I think that they would be great to work with.
A man who I interviewed with, and who was friendly enough to walk downstairs with me and point out which direction to walk in for the subway train, gave me his business cards so that I could communicate with him if I have any questions.
I would like to inform him of this project, in which I researched the performance of a particular stock, using financial data (it is financial analyst internship, where I would be assisting the team in coming up with plans for successfully budgeting their client's marketing plans), but I am nervous about coming off as irritating.
Of course, he is busy and has tons of other things to do. Should I email him the details of that project?
The opportunity is amazing. I have the option to return for another summer, if it goes well, and possibly relocate to do the rotational program which will expose me to all areas of the business. (link)
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Leave things alone. You thanked him and now its in their hands to choose their candadate. Contacting again can be seen as unprofessional or pushing for a decision. It backfired every single time.
Beleive me they know who you are abd what you have done and offer. These people also check every aspect of a person's background and will likely find out about this project in that process. Ask your references kindly if they can highlight that project when people call. That's how to handle your omission.
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I work with this lady i am really interested on her but just that one thing thats keeping me away from her is that Facebook status it say in a relationship when i work with her her action doest indicate that she's in a relationship all the go signal that i can think of is there i know when your in a relationship you would know just base on her action i know ladys would mention it you would just know with her none body language everything a go signal one time i showed that one of the parts of my surfboard i surf you know one time i said one of the hostess wants to learn how to surf so then when i said that its like a beam of light came out of nowhere i don't know bc she was jealous or that i didn't ask her first or she just want to learn how to surf i don't know anyways she automaticly ask me to teach her how to surf then when she was walking away she then said your gonna take me how to surf i that point when i was talking to her she was loughing when i know its not even funny the other time is when i showed her a picture of my friends we were having a party she then goes wow!!!that look so fun she then goes why was i not invited!!!!all i buying signal right but that Frekken Facebook status what is that all about (link)
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A lot of people keep details of their private life private. They dont necessarily talk about family or people they are with at work. It doesnt pertain to the job. You can tell her that you didnt invite her surfing or to a party before in the event she was with someone. Tell her you didnt want to seem inappropriate.
Her Facebook page is her private space. Unless she invites you to it I wouldnt mention it. It will make her question what you were doing on it and may have her take a negative view. Also, the in a relationship status bar may be true but could be outdated. I know some people msy also use it if they dont want one either or to deal with people who may.
All I would do is mention the surfing and party and tell her you didnt invite her because you werent sure whether her significant other would object. The thing is maybe all she sees you as is a co-worker or nice guy. Pursuing her beyond that would be bad. If there is no signal of her showing interest move on.
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Why do I have writers block. Its difficult for me to communicate on line with family and friends. I'm having trouble writing paragraphs, sentences, my vocabulary has disappeared. I've worked on this paragraph for 45-minutes.I'm embarrassed to admit I'm a college graduate.
I've don't have any medical issues that I know of. Why is this happening.
(link)
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Chalk it up to stress and psychologically doing a number on yourself. You fear failing. Dont. You need to realize writing is a gift that is your birthright and never taken from you. Its still there. You have to relax and remember what you love about it and just write. You will find that spelling and paragraphs will come back. Just write and get ideas out first. In time you will learn to edit for clarity.
You need to go to a bookstore or Amazon and get The Lively Art of Writing by Lucile Vaughan Payne. No other book explains writing essays, paragraphs, thesis or any other document as easily as it does. Read and study it religiously and you will improve and have no need to fear again. There are exercises at the end of every chapter. You need to read about topic sentences and structure.
The other thing is if something doesnt come right away relax. Take a break and approach it again later when your head is clear and you feel calm. Also get a sheet of paper and draw balloons you put ideas or points you want to make and connect it to a main topic. Then start building paragraphs about each. Its called symantec webbing.
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I was sitting at lunch with 2 of my friends, and they took my pencil, (it wouldn't be that important but, it was my last pencil, and I was 1 warning away from getting detention.) I was trying to get it back so my friend scratched me across my hand. I said please don't do it again, but she just laughted, and punched me in the arm. The other one drove her nail into my arm during social studies and left a scar. I don't want to avoid them, and get a teacher of parent involved. Is there some way I can stop this?! (link)
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Ask them what do they think they are pulling? Tell them that friends dont hurt one another and this isnt a joke. See if you get an apology or changes in their conduct. If you dont mention to the teacher what is going on and that you want them spoken to but in a way that it doesnt out you as the complainant.
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please tell me how i can make the voices stop! they are scary and say terrible things that i can't blocl out of my mind. how do i make voices in my head go away? (link)
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Proceed to an emergency room and tell them what you told us. You may be in crisis and suffering from a mental health issue that is becoming quite severe. You need to be assessed and treated.
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This may be a weird place to ask about scholarships but maybe someone can help on this topic. I am student at a community college and I am transferring to a four-year university and I need advice on finding scholarships that pertain to me. Right now, I am applying for $500-1000 scholarship because I think it more practical to go for a lot of small scholarships then 1 big scholarship ($10000). Should I email my representative about scholarship opportunities? (link)
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Absolutely! They will know exactly which ones would be suited to what you are trying to study and transfer into. They might even know of scholarships, loans or bursaries you were never aware of. Make it a top priority to see them first.
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She started dating this guy a few weeks ago maybe a month. the first day they started dating he sucked her boobs and they have had sex and shes given him blow jobs. I know all of this cause she told me and i saw her text messages. she also started smoking weed which is really easy to get were i live. i feel like i should tell someone but i dot want to get her in trouble whet do i do? (link)
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I think some of what she is telling you may be false. She could just want to sound cool to you and others. Almost always adolescents who brag about experiences never had them.
Even if she did she should keep it to herself. You can get a reputation for blabbing about your private life. Politely tell her that its not right to kiss and tell and that while you are a friend you dont want to hear about it. That is a reasonable request.
As far as marijuana goes she will have to learn from mistakes. Unless you see her life completely out of control which you havent telling on her will unfortunately cause you social problems. You can tell her that you dont like what she is doing and think she is in with the wrong crowd but you cant make her see. If she were in danger than tell.
As for sex she could get pregnant or taken advantage of by other people. You should make your parents aware of what she has described to you and her sudden interest in msrijuana. They will know how to guide you and when/if they address her family at some point. Your parents should know about anything or anyone making you uncomfortable.
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When I go to the doctor I want to know what they ask because if they are going to tell my mom I play with myself I am not going for any reason until I live on my own. Please help! (link)
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Anything told to a doctor is confidential unless you have an illness they need to know about or are harming yourself or endangered.
I know they wont ask. They know that it is normal with both sexes and pretty much universal in teen years. Stats say 80 percent of males and 70 of females engage in it at one point in life. Relax and know there isnt anything to be ashamed of.
Parents also are wise to this and probably suspect you are and it wont phase them. But relax the doctor cant tell nor does he or she have concern. They know teens are embarased about it. There is no way to tell either unless you mention it.
The one thing to remember is that even if they wont admit it the vast majority of friends, peers and others you know are also doing tnis. It is normal.
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