I'm a woman in Texas. I'm married and have a school-aged child. I have a medical background. I'm quite liberal, socially. I love helping people with medical, parenting, and social questions. Don't ask me about tech stuff or finances, because I need advice on those things myself!
Gender: Female
Location: Texas
Age: 34
Member Since: December 17, 2006
Answers: 795
Last Update: September 2, 2007
Visitors: 50093
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Xenolan
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My sister just let me know that our dog, who is really old (around 17) has been in pain and has been having trouble walking/balancing. The other night, she noticed he was crying and that he was lying on his stomach, on all legs (spread across the floor). She took him to the vet today, and he said that since our dog is old, he has pinched nerves and is in pain.. so he gave him an injection (not sure what) and took a blood test. He also has a prescription for steroids. We're going to see how he feels after a while.. if he is still in pain, we may have to put him to sleep.
Anyway, my question is: has anyone ever heard of this, and how common is it? Also, what are the chances that my dog (at his old age) will actually feel better with the meds? I have a feeling we may have to put him to sleep soon :( (link)
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I disagree with the previous poster. Your vet has your pet's best interests at heart. Let him find out what's wrong and try to give your dog a little more good time through the steroids and pain medicine. If it's not working after a reasonable amount of time, then you can make the decision to put him to sleep. You don't have to do this now. See what happens.
Sabine
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heyy.
i have dirty blonde har, but i want it to look more blonde.
i found the sunsilk color boost for blondes, but its for dyed hair. if i use it will it affect me, even though its for dyed hair?
is there any thing else i can use to make my hair more blonde? thankssss :]
(lemon juice is not an option )
♥ (link)
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I don't know about the Sunsilk products, but over-the-counter hydrogen peroxide applied to your hair will eventually bleach it a bit.
Sabine
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Everybody talks about this amazing tea tree oil face stuff from The Body Shop. Im looking on their website right now, but Im not sure which one it is.
Is it this stuff?
http://www.thebodyshop.com/bodyshop/browse/product_detail.jsp?productId=prod170248&categoryId=cat30012
I also have combination skin.
Like..my skin is dry. and when I put moisturizer on, it gets oily. So will this be mild enough so that it wont strip the hydration out of my skin?
or is it this?
http://www.thebodyshop.com/bodyshop/browse/product_detail.jsp?productId=prod170252&categoryId=cat30012
which would be better for me?
i have acne also.
(link)
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Please allow me to point out for your benefit and that of the previous poster that shark cartiledge is not an approved treatment for acne and it's made from cartiledge of actual sharks, who are endangered species. If it worked, it might be worth a try, but your doctor can give you things that will work better, like benzoyl peroxide and clindamycin gel. Tea tree oil *might* work well. I have found that each person's skin is different. If you're interested in pursuing tea tree oil (and I've heard it's good in shampoo as well), I would call the Body Shop and ask the salespeople.
Sabine
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17/m
Aight, i'm confused
my girlfriend tried explaining how tampons work? because i wanted to have sex and she couldnt because her tampon or something? ok, if the tampon goes in the same hole, does that mean she can have pleasure from it?
signed,
clueless (link)
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I guess it's theoretically possible to have pleasure from a tampon, but I've never experienced it or heard of it. First, because the tampon is much smaller than a penis in diameter, second because you don't do the in-out-repeat motion, and third because you have your period and are likely crampy and not in the mood. But I guess it could happen. But she can take her tampon out and have sex with you. It just means that you'd get blood on your penis/finger. You can do other things, though, like rub her clitoris.
Sabine
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Sometimes like for 2 weeks or more at a time, I will not be able to sleep because of something feeling like it is sticking out of my butt, or stuck in there. In the morning it doesn't bother me, but mostly at night. Also when I take a bath it fell somewhat better but i can still feel it. What do you think? 13/f (link)
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Okay, dear. What you're describing sounds like a common childhood infestation called pinworms. Here's an informational link:
http://www.drgreene.org/body.cfm?xyzpdqabc=0&id=21&
action=detail&ref=500
Remember, no one can actually diagnose this without looking at your bottom, so bring this to the attention of a parent.
Good luck.
Sabine
Thank you for the feedback. You asked how you tell your parents? I think I would just tell them there's something wrong and you think it might be pinworms. You can just hand them a printed-out version of the paper and tell them that you have the symptoms that are listed, since it's understandable that a 13-year-old wouldn't want to tell her father she has an itchy b-hole in those words. That's how I'd do it.
:) Sabine
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ok my genocologist said to start my birth control this sunday. (i was given ovulon, i think thats wt it called)
anyway if i start it and one week i forgot to take it do i take it the nxt time i remember... or what if i forget to take it until the nxt day then do i take 2 or one??
please help!!! i worried that im going to forget to take it and its really important that i do take it....
Thanx in advance!
(link)
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For now, use a condom if you have sex. Tomorrow, call your OB/GYN's office and ask.
Sabine
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I want to go to college to become a psychiatrist. I just don't know where I want to go! I either want to go to school in Texas or maybe Illinois. What colleges would be good for what I want to do? (link)
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A psychiatrist, unlike a psychologist, is a medical doctor. You have to get your undergrad degree first, then go to Medical School. Good colleges are University of Texas (which has a medical school in Houston), Baylor University in Houston, and University of Chicago in Illinois (I think). Do searches for college ranking on Google. Go to the American Psychological Association's website. You can find these answers easily.
Sabine
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ok so i am 15 going to be 16 and all of my other friends are going to be 15. i have been with my close friends since like 9 years old an all this time they've been thinking that i am the same age as them but i am not. im just so scared that they will find out in school and never speak to me again. but i dont know how to say it. i just dont feel like im older. they'll hate me. because i have kept that secret for so long. but right now i am in highschool and i really dont like my new school. i want to go where my other friends are but i am scared if i do go they will see that i am a year older because of those student i.d that say the year you were born in. also in my new school i am so scared because someone might find out. i started school late. i dont know what to do. i always have to be hiding my school i.d. but i really dont want to tell my new friends or my old friends. my new friends becase they are all bratty and they will make a big fuss over it. and my old friends becase i dont want to dissapoint them. also i have like a babyface and matured less then they did so i think thats why they think that i am the same age as them. i hate this. what should i do i am so worried i really dont want to tell them.!
p.s also..if you were my friend and i tell you that i got a misprint when i was younger and i was coming here to the u.s would you believe me? what else can i say so it can look realistic?.
thanks! (link)
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I agree with Abby on this one. And just so you know, it can be a great advantage to have a friend who's a year older. She can drive first! Just be honest with them and I don't think it will be a big deal. If it is, then they were going to freak out about something, eventually, whether it was the date of your birth or that you mistakenly wore white after labor day or some little infraction. As long as you act like it's no big deal, they probably won't care either. I know I wouldn't have.
Sabine
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Ok I'm going to tell ya right now If u dont like clique questions stop reading. I'm the leader of a clque, I'm the most popular girl in my school and I have 4 great friends we have weekly sleep overs and things like that and theres this new girl at my school who came in and took my friends I dont want to be mean to her (which is taking all my will power) so wat should I do???? (link)
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Well, friends aren't objects to be taken, so I guess what happened is that the friends went to the new girl. So what you should probably do next is include the new girl in your clique and see if you can ALL be friends.
Sabine
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what gives away to a guy that makes them know a girl's been used 'down there' a lot? like rumors went around that one girl at my school was like "roast beef" or she'd been fingered way too much or something and some guy could tell.. how can a girl tell (besides the fact knowing she's been around a lot)? (link)
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There's no way to know how many times a girl has been fingered unless you ask her. Saying the girl was like roast beef was just a disgusting way of putting her down and it's a game guys play. All it means is that the guy wanted to appear sexually experienced, but too good for a *that* girl.
Sabine
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For a project in health we have to research stuff with babies...and i can't find anything!
we need to look up stuff on a baby from birth-10 months
we have to do 3 charts on Parents Sleep before/after the baby
Diapers used monthly from 0-10 months
and 'parental free time'
it's soppossed to not make us have sex or something idk but i cant find info on that ANYWHERE
and i asked my mom and she was like "i dont remeber. too many diapers not enough sleep"
HELP! PLEASE! (link)
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Regarding parents' sleep patterns, you can look at something like _What to Expect the First Year_ to find out how much sleep babies of different ages get throughout the first year. It greatly varies. My child, for example, had reflux. She would take an hour to eat 2 ounces, throw up most of it, and then go to sleep for one hour before she was hungry again. This happened around the clock for the first 7 weeks until she had surgery. I think most newborn babies wake up every 4 hours or so for the first couple of weeks to eat for about 1/2 hour. If you can't find the info on the web or by looking in parenting books, are you allowed to go to a daycare or your church nursery and poll parents dropping off and picking up kids?
I think most kids in the first year of life go through approx. 7 diapers a day. Parental free time? It depends on what else the parent is doing, doesn't it? I mean, sometimes you can have your baby on your lap while you watch Oprah. Does that count? But there are other parents who go to school or work full-time or both. It's all a matter of priority.
I think the best way to get a good grade likely is to say that parenting is expensive, it wrecks your social life (except that with parents of other similarly-aged children), and it blows your sleep time pretty much. Conclude that you would only be able to parent a child with a stable partner, steady, sufficient income, and an established support network.
Sabine
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I have a really good immune system. I'm never sick besides a sore throat every once in awhile. But I get stomach sick almost every week. Sometimes I wont go to the bathroom (number 2 if you know what I mean) for up to three days. I know that can be normal, but it makes me feel terrible. I'm not able to go even if I tell myself to. I know its gross, but its really started to effect me this past year. If my mom knew how much pepto bismoth, anti gas pills and tums I took she would think there was something seriously wrong with my digestive tract. I know that no one on here is a doctor, but are these signs major enough that I should see a doctor about it? Or are these normal things that occur? (link)
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I'm not a doctor, but I have worked for many of them. Some were gastroenterologists. Yes, you should probably see someone. Not having a bowel movement for up to 3 days may be normal, but when it distresses you, it could be a problem. My guess would be constipation-predominant irritable bowel syndrome. But you should see the doctor to make sure.
Sabine
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ok when I stay over at my boyfriends house, when I wake up the first thing he wants to do is kiss me...but I have morning breath...what can I do so I won't wake up with bad breath? (link)
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You can try a 12-hour toothpaste like Colgate Total, but what I'd try is just keeping some mints by the bed and popping one in when you wake up.
Sabine
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i have a few cuts/little scabs above my lip.
ive had them since yesterday (monday) and its only been a day.
ive been putting some neosporin on them.
how long do you think it would take for them to heal?
its embarrasing lol. =/ (link)
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It depends on how deep the cuts are and how quickly you heal. I would give it a week.
Sabine
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I want to know If its okay to try and get to know my husbands daughter of 17years. He and his girlfriend at the time had this child well he was never allowed to see this child and now after 17years later she the girlfriend decides to contact him and ask for child support, they finally met and everything seemed fine until my husband said some things that the girlfriend didnt like and now the daughter doesnt respond to him, she the 17yr old just found out who her real father was the mother lied to her or didnt tell her who her real father was until now and when they met for the first time they both wanted to get to know each other and get to know my children. I guess my husband told the girlfrien that he couldnt forgive her since she wouldnt allow his dying mother a picture of her 1st granddaughter and she died not knowing what she looked like. I want nothing to do with the mother and so does my husband but his 17year seems to be holding resentments towards him from her mother, I guess she is siding with her mother and is avoiding my husband I want to help her and my husband to get to know each other but I just cant seem to I feel like I'm interfering. Now it seems as the girlfriend wants to get with my husband in a romantic sort of way because she is constantly calling him and not about their daughter she is being selfish. What can I do or should I do anything? Do I just let it be and let time takes it course, the 17yr has been emailing my oldest 14yr old and seems to be getting along but I can sense that the 17yr old is hurting, the girlfriend had a dysfunctional family she didnt know who her father was and her mother was a drug addict and alcoholic alot of things happened between my husband and her and he had alot of resentments towards her and cause his depression to become severe due to this and now after 17years later she decides to come looking for him and disrupt my life. I am 41, a mother of 6 children I dont know how to handle this situation I am at a total loss here. Am I wrong to have such terrible thoughts about this "other woman in my husbands life,I dont understand how another person can hurt another so badly in this way and ask for forgiveness after this many years because she needs money...but I dont want those feelings to be toward his daughter if anything I want to console her that its okay and that we all want to get along I want a family like relationship to develop between my husband and his daughter
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Yikes. Your husband made a real mistake in getting together with this woman. Now he's tied to her by an innocent child, who's likely feeling very torn between her mother, who's been her parent forever, and this person her mother now says is her father. Has his paternity been established? Why is the mother pursuing this now? She sounds extremely untrustworthy to me and I don't think I'd believe a word she says without independent verification. I'm sure your husband is smart enough to stay away from her and not get entangled with her again. Write the mother off, as much as you can. When she calls, ask her right away what she needs and keep it business-like.
As for the child, I think all you can do is to make a gesture, like suggest that your husband give her something of his mother's, to give her a physical connection to him and his family. Ask her to come over at least once a week for a family dinner, and encourage her to speak with your oldest child. Let her know that you are always there to talk and that you would talk to her even without your husband being there.
Of course, my parents are still married and I've been married to one person for 10 years and neither of us has other children. So everything I said may be totally wrong. It's just what I think is probably good advice.
Good luck.
Sabine
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16, female, 105 lbs., 5'4"
am I extremely underweight?
I don't think so.
not at all.
yet my parents are considering sending me to in-patient rehabilitation for anorexia.
any thoughts?
help? (link)
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You need a pediatric BMI calculator, not an adult one. That can be found at http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/usefultools/l/
bl_bmi_calc.htm
When I put in your info, I got BMI of 18.1, which is just barely above the underweight category. BMI doesn't tell the whole story. In order to be anorexic, you must have other symptoms, like food restriction or over-exercising.
Be honest with yourself about whether you really do have anorexia. Do you see an outpatient counselor? I'm sure you aren't just naturally skinny and your parents just jumped right to the inpatient option without having you diagnosed first. You probably have already been diagnosed and have a distorted body image and other symptoms besides a somewhat low body-weight. Is it possible?
Sabine
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Hey.
My fiance and I are having "living issues".
When we get married he wants to live in the upstairs of his house. Which his dad turned into an apartment with a kitchen, bathroom, living room, ect. Its just like a real house.
I see nothing wronge with this other than the fact that his parents treat him like a dog, take all his money, prevent him from doing half the stuff he wants to, and force him to wait on them hand and foot. Yes, he stands up for himself but it still doesn't make it right.
I've tryed talking to him about getting a modular. I think they are very nice.
He kinda agrees.
Well, with his job, he makes $10 an hour, and makes around 700 every 2 weeks. He got the job in October. Thats the problem.
Since he isn't istablished well in his job, I'm worried that he will lose it and we wpn't be able to pay the bills.
So, I want your opinion.
Even though I don't like his parents and neither does he.
Do you think that it would be best to just stay at his house until we have money saved up to get a home, or just jump into it right to start with?
Thanks. (link)
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I doubt you could qualify for a home loan if you don't have at least 5% down, given your likely young age, relatively low earning potential, and the length of his work history at his present job. If I were you, I'd look into getting an apartment. If the upstairs of the parents' house is so nice, they can rent it out to someone else and take the renter's money and see if they can treat the renter like a dog, etc.
Sabine
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18-f-aus
is it possible if 2 girls have oral together like you can catch aids or other diseases cause i have been with a few girls and im scared now that ive catched something and im gonna die its not possible if i just used my fingers right?? and you cant get diseases in yoru mouth can u please help im scared that ive got some infesting disease inside of me killing me away without me knowing (link)
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It's not likley that you have caught any diseases through oral contact or fingering. You can get chlamydia in your throat through oral with an infected person, but it's not likely. I don't know what resources are available to you in Austria or Australia (hard to tell which), but in order to set your mind at ease, you could probably go to a health clinic and speak with someone. If you're concerned about HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, you could donate blood. They will tell you if your blood comes up as questionable in the screening.
Meanwhile, educate yourself on the use of devices such as dental dam. Find out what diseases there are, which ones you can prevent, and how. Then I suggest that you try to find one partner with no exposure to sexually transmitted diseases and stay with him/her.
I think you're probably worrying too much but protecting yourself too little at this point.
Sabine
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Hey!
First of all I just want to say that I really admire and respect you and the advice that you give everyone.
So, anyway, a while ago I asked this question;
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=468313
And the answer that I received from you has stayed the most significant to me. But the thing is, I mean, I still fill that way. I think she is so talented and seems to be such a nice person, and now it’s not only her but Sara Ramirez too (she plays Callie). I probably feel stronger about her and its just weird, because yes I see Kate as a motherly type figure; But I think that her and Sara are both really "HOT". That's probably the weirdest thing to me is that, like them both so much and think they are very attractive. The reason I like Sara is probably more for all her talent, but still its become like an obsession, and that bothers me more than I let my self feel, its just all so uncomfortable.
Sorry, I was rambling, But I guess my question is, is it wrong to feel this way? Am I weird? Maybe I'm just a crazy fanatic. But most of all, what do you think?
Thank you so, so much!
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Sorry this took so long. I needed time to think about it. I'm still not sure what has changed in the time between when I answered the first question and now. Perhaps it's the fact that nothing has changed except that you've added a new object of admiration that troubles you.
All I can really say is that there are probably a lot of women out there (straight, lesbian, and bi) who consider Kate and Sara absolutely hot. There is nothing wrong with that. We are taught from a very young age that we want to be attractive and we want to associate with the attractive people. It's just something we learn early. Most women dress up to be beautiful in order to be the prettiest woman in the room. It doesn't matter whether there are any men present. We want to be the most attractive. But here are these actresses who are both drop-dead gorgeous, talented, and intelligent. We are attracted to them naturally and we want to associate with them.
Now here's another fact well-known in the medical community. Patients are in awe of their doctors and often develop crushes on them. These wonderful doctors, caring, gentle, smart, and powerful, scoop us up from our misery and make everything better. It's a recognized fact that patients develop crushes on doctors. If they're of the same sex, we often convert those feelings into motherly affection because they sweetly, gently care for us and they're (ideally) always on our side and believe us when we say we have pain. There again comes the part that maybe if you don't have that open, caring relationship with your mother, perhaps you have identified with Kate and Sara as mother-types and fixated on that. Now, Sara's character is not old enough to be your mother, but Addison probably is.
So, to your questions: Is it wrong to feel this way? NO. It's not wrong to *feel* as long as it doesn't harm anyone else. It's our actions, not our feelings, that are wrong, usually. If you start running off to L.A., climbing fences, and stalking these actors, then it's wrong. If you harm yourself by going into a delusional world, it's wrong. If you simply watch the show and internally think how hot those women are, then you're a person who can apprecite the subtleties of how we're supposed to think Addison's adorable and Sara is attractive. They don't hire ugly, old people to play these characters. And what does it hurt to see them as hot or especially as mother figures?
Are you weird? I should hope so. Otherwise, you're average! ;) While not everyone experiences this same emotion over these characters, you're not hooked on Desperate Housewives or Sex and the City reruns, like many are. We all have our little obsessions. It's not weird to feel attracted to those actresses. It would be weird to change your name to Addison Callie McHotty.
That's when you'd switch over into the crazy fanatic side. Whatever it is - girl crush or mother-figure issues or bisexual blossomings - it doesn't hurt anyone else. It is what it is. You are who you are. You will eventually either lose interest in those two or you will learn that it doesn't affect anything either way and you'll get more comfortable with your emotions. And I think you're a fine young woman with great taste.
Thanks for the compliments on my advice, also. I appreciate that my words spoke to you.
Sabine
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OK, well, plain and simple-I've had the worse gas ever these last 3 days. I don't know why. They're those hot, smelly farts. I'm really afraid to go to school. I can't go out to get anything, so are there any suggestions to make this gas go away!?!?!
Hah thanks. (link)
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Regarding the advice you received to eat a lot of veggies, I don't know which planet that fellow is on, but the *better* our diet, the more gas we get for the most part. Yeast may have something to do with gas, but there's also the matter of cruciferous vegetables, like cabbage, cauliflower, and broccoli, and cucumbers also, which make things much worse.
Gas-X or something with the ingredient simethicone should help. If you can't find that at home and can't go buy it, I would try some Pepto Bismol.
Sabine
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