I was friends with this guy last year, but he got into drinking and stuff, which I don't do, so I stopped talking to him. Then, one of my closest friends started dating him, and naturally, we started talking again. He had stopped drinking and doing bad stuff. We became good friends and I told him a lot about myself, especially about my family problems. He would always text me and one day, he asked me to hang out at his house. We hung out before, without his girlfriend before, so I didn't think it was a big deal. I even talked to her about it, and she was fine with it. That night when we hung out, he kept trying to hook up with me. He was flirting and tickling me and I kept telling him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. He was kissing my neck and stuff, and everytime I mentioned his girlfriend, he said he'd just kiss me more. He also told me how his girlfriend was only a "2 out of 3" because she hasn't given him a blow job. He kept touching my butt and my chest and pretty much everywhere else. I knew it was wrong, but he wouldn't stop. Honestly, it was the first time in a while that I felt wanted, and when he tried to hook up, I did for a second. I pulled away and said it was wrong, but he kept kissing and touching me. I still don't get why I did it, but he just kept pressuring me. Afterwards, he acted as if it wasn't a big deal even though he cheated on his girlfriend, also my friend. He told me not to say anything, butI told her a week later because I was too scared to tell her right away. She was really upse, but she seemed more mad at him than me. Her sister pretty much hates me now. The guy hates me too, but I don't care because I hate him too. However, his girlfriend and him are on a "break" and she's forgiving him. I don't understand why because he doesn't truly love her. I'm afraid he's gonna hurt her again. I just don't get why I'm not being forgiven too when it was both of us. Also, I think it's more of his fault than mine. They were some of my closest friends and now I'm depressed, lonely, and don't have anyone.
That's a really tough situation. Even though you were telling him no, you should have gotten up and left. You knew he was with your friend, and you knew it was wrong. If it was a situation where you absolutely could not get out of it, tell your friend that. Tell her that you kept telling him to stop and that he wouldn't. Let your friend know that you're extremely sorry about it and that you won't even hang out with him again. No matter what, things are going to be awkward now between you, her and him. It's just an awkward thing. Make sure your friend knows that you don't have any feelings for him, but that you just got pressured and caught up in the moment.
If your friend doesn't forgive, remember that there are plenty of other people to be friends with. Try hanging out with people that you're friends with now more often. They could very likely become your best friends instead of just casual friends. If your friend realizes that you are sorry and that you know what you did wrong, she should forgive you sooner or later. Just make sure that she knows that you understand why she's upset and that you wish it never happened.
Darby(:
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18- female
i'm not the quite girl, i'm one who likes to go out and do things and i have alot of confidence and a high self esteem BUT there is one problem with me, i am SO SO SO scared of getting rejected, about anything. yeah i know, who isnt afriad of getting rejected but my phobia is horrible. i can't even text one of my good guy friends (who i also have a crush on) to ask if he wants to hang out because i'm worried he will be like "well i'm going to do this..." even though we had this big talk and he was like well if you want to see me just tell me and i was like well of course i want to see you since i dont get to anymore and he was like alright just let me know when! and thats the problem, i can't get the courage to even text him and be like lets hang out tonight! or what are you doing tonight? because i'm scared he will already be doing something or has plans which will then make me feel dumb. i'm just like that, i hate asking people to hang out. what's my problem? why cant i just ask him to hangout? AGH it's so annnoying.
It sounds like you're just afraid of awkward situations. It's not like you're afraid that he's going to reject you. It's like you're afraid he's already going to be doing something and then it will be like ohh. well.. what do I say next?
You should text him and say, "Hey, we should hang soon. I'm not doing anything this week, got any ideas?"
That way you're not asking anything specific enough to get rejected. Just type it in, close your eyes, and hit send. You'll never get to hang out with him if you don't do it. And it really sounds like he wants hang out! If you send him a general text like that, he'll be able to take it from there as to when or where you guys should hang out.
Good luck!
Darby(:
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I go to an all-girl school, so, naturally, this makes it a tad harder to meet guys. This still doesn't make it normal that I know no guys because every girl I know talks about guys, guys, and more guys.
Anyway, I have issues with friends. We don't hang out on the weekends because they don't invite me and I feel unwanted. So, people often offer the advice "Meet a guy through your girl friends!" It doesn't apply here because I really don't have real girl friends.
The thing is, I feel so damn empty and I really can't stand it. I don't know where to meet a guy. I don't even know how to make friends. And to top this all off, I am really overweight. I mean really, I could lose 100 lbs and be normal weight, or slightly underweight.
I know that a guy will not make me feel less empty and another person cannot solve my problems, but I feel like I don't know what to do and even if I found solutions, I wouldn't know how to pursue them.
My main question is: Where can I meet guys?
And how can I not repel them?
First, you need to gain confidence in yourself. If you feel like you need to lose weight, try diet and exercise. Even if you don't lose 100 lbs or anything near it, exercising will make you feel better in general.
There are many good places to meet guys depending on your personal interests. If you like reading, try meeting a guy at a library. If you like coffee and interesting conversation, go to your local cafe and try to strike up a conversation with someone.
Don't limit your search to males. By meeting girls, you'll be able to go out with a group of girls and not feel so alone in your pursuit of a good guy.
Don't think that you're going to repel guys. Even if you are overweight, it doesn't mean that you're not pretty. Plus, your personality can do 90% of the work. I know tons of people that aren't great looking, but always have boy/girlfriends.
It's all about a fun-loving, positive personality. Most people like being around people that have a positive aura and energy about them. Once you start feeling more positive about yourself and your life, people will be able to feel that positivity when they're around you.
Hope this helps,
Darby(:
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does masturbauting give you more pimples/acne?
There is no correlation between masturbating and acne. Masturbating more or less won't affect how much or little acne you have.
Darby(:
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so my best friend and brother just started dating. i hate that so much! i cant be a bad friend to her though and say how i really feel about them. i just dont want to lose her because everytime we are together she is texting him and they are in the same house and she wants to go to his room to be with him when we are supposed to be having "best friend time" however everytime they are together she never texts me or even splits her time between us. she promised me he would never ever take her away from me but i feel like he already is..what should i do?
Telling her how you feel won't make you a 'bad' friend. If she's your best friend, you're supposed to be able to talk to her about anything that's bothering you. Let her know that it hurts your feelings when she's at your house to see you, then she goes to his room to hang with him. And that it bothers you when she texts him the whole time you're together. She needs to know how you feel so that she can try to do something about it before it gets out of hand.
I don't blame you at all for hating your brother and best friend dating. I absolutely would despise that. I couldn't be friends with someone if they decided to date my brothers. I would feel like that was crossing a boundary. You're a good friend for not being angry with her for dating your brother, but stand up for yourself and (calmly) let her know how you feel.
Darby(:
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17/f. I recently started having sex with my boyfriend with condoms, and we decided I should go on birth control. I got it from my local Planned Parenthood and realized it was making me moody and crazy. This could have just been my body getting used to it, but I decided to stop taking it after a week and a half. I still have two packs left that I could use if I want, but I'm afraid of getting moody again.
Should I continue to just use condoms? Is it safe enough, or should I take the pills just incase, even though they might change my personality a little bit?
If I were you, I would give the birth control another run. Wait a few weeks to let your body get adjusted to it. If the moodiness continues, you can try to go back and get a different type of birth control that might be more compatible with you.
Condoms are supposed to be 98% effective when used correctly. But they do have the risk of tearing. Birth control is much more effective.
Darby(:
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I really like this guy and he has a girlfriend but regardless i justfigured out he lied to me about EVERYTHING.
so im pretyy freaking hearbroken, we were bestfriends.
so what are some good songs and quotes about like getting lied to and all that?
:] thankss
Listen to Secondhand Serenade. Pretty much every song by him is about heartbreak.
Feel better and inbox me if you want to talk further about it.
Darby(:
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15/f/cuabn
okay so my boyfriend and i had something going on for the past like 3 months, but we finally made us offical about a week or so ago. so my parents found out about me and my bf cause my dumb ass brother told my mom, now shes SUPER pissed at me cause obviously shes racist to me going out with a black guy (she doesnt care about black friends) and i dont know what to do cause she told me i better not be with him, and i better stay away from him cause if not shes gonna call the cops and all this bulshit, and she just so mad and shes like how are you going to ruin your life like that and all this crazy crap, and tomarow i have to have a talk with her and my dad about it. and im super nervous cause i dont know what they are gonna say, and she treatend me about not being able to go out unless shes with me cause shes scared im going to meet up with him. and she doesnt know him, never seen him or met him, and shes judging him saying all these mean things and just cause he has tattoos she thinks hes bad and nasty or whatver.. ugh! i dont know what to do, i like him so much, and he likes me too.
): all i been doing is crying.
I'm sorry you're in this situation because it's a tough one to be in. When you talk to your parents, make sure they know that you don't have the same feelings as them about race issues and interracial relationships. Tell them that you are an individual and are fully capable of forming your own opinions regarding who to date and who not to date.
You did mention that your mother said she would call the cops if she found out you were with him. This leads me to believe that he is possible 18 or older. If so, there is simply nothing you can do to change your parents mind. Not only is it against your parents rules, but it's also against the law.
If he is a minor also, try to listen to what your parents have to say. Tell them that you understand and appreciate their concern. Tell them the reasons why you like him, and don't say good looks first (; Tell the aspects of his personality that you like.
Ask them to let him come over for dinner so they can meet with him and get to know him better before passing any judgments.
Try to be as mature as possible. If you cry and whine around about how you're mature enough to choose who you want to date, your parents are automatically going to see a little girl that doesn't really know what she wants. State your case as calmly as possible and keep a cool head.
Hope this helps,
Darby(:
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i'm not really asking too much for advice, but more of opinions and what you guys think. so heres my story (17f&17m):
i dated this guy for 8 months and we broke up the last week of april...he said he doesn't have the same feelings for me. however, we went to prom together and i was laying on this guy cause i wasn't feeling good and he was off doing his own thing...and he got upset at me for that...we both decided that itd be best for us not to talk until summer starts (which is in like a month from now) then he wants to start hanging out again as friends and he said "if its meant to be, it'll be". we started going out during the summer of last year and i was thinking of doing something cute when we hang out to realize why he fell for me last summer. i really love this kid and he treats me right. so what do you guys think i should do with this whole situation..is there anything that can boost our chances of getting back together?
Just be yourself and make sure he knows how you feel. You may think he understands how you feel without having to really say it, but in order to stop any possible misconceptions, you should let him know exactly what you're thinking and feeling when you start hanging out again. I think it's a cute idea to do something to remind him of last summer. Where did you guys first hang out? Did you have a special song? Do something that you did when you were at your happiest together. If there was a movie you really enjoyed together or an experience, reenact it to try to spark the relationship again.
If I were you, I would just wait the month until summer break. School and finals could be stressing you out and taking a toll on your relationship. Once you're done with school, you can hang out stress/drama-free.
Just make sure you are yourself 100%. If he still feels like he doesn't have the same feelings he used to, it's time to move on. It will be summer break and a perfect opportunity to spark up something new with someone new. It could be like a completely fresh start.
Good luck!
Darby(:
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ok so my boyfriend just fingered me for the second time, and it was really hard and really deep. im a virgin and the first time he did it, i bled a little bit in my underwear, so i figured he popped my cherry (broke my hymen). but this time, he did it just as hard and intense and i bled again. is it just possible that my hymen didn't break all the way? is there any other reason why it could be bleeding?
It's definitely possible that it wasn't all the way broken so it bled again. Make sure that your boyfriend's nails aren't long though. If they are, he could be scratching you and making you bleed.
Darby(:
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i wanna gett my belly pierced soooo badly you
don't even know, but idon'tknow how much does
it really hurt and if your skinny does it her
more? whats the chance of infection? and whats
the cost of getting it done? and i wanna convince
my mom to let me get it done but she keeps on
saying no, is there anyway to ensure to her
that its safe? please leave something (:
-toriii ;DD
I got mine pierced when I was fourteen and had virtually no problems with it. It only cost like $10 and didn't hurt much at all. I'm skinny and it didn't hurt, but I don't think it makes a difference if you're heavy. I used salt water spray to protect it from infection.
Darby
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I like this guy I have been really good friends with..and we text and chat ALL the time...he has told me many times that I am hot and pretty and he likes talking to me...just recently he told me and ONLY me that he was moving and he wanted to be in a relationship before he moved..but he likes another girl. Should I give up on him?
I agree that you should tell him how you feel. But if he maintains his liking for the other girl, you should give up on dating him. You also need to think about how you're going to feel when he moves and you have to break up. You don't want to get too close to him, then have him move. It's odd to me that he wants to be in a relationship when he's moving anyway. Make sure it's not just a sexual thing (unless you want that)
Good luck,
Darby(:
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ok i have these to friends a and b there both guys there fighting over this 1 girl (c) and a)wants to fight b) a) drew this picture of himself and b) b was on the floor and a was up in the air with his fist up punching b then above a it said die he handed to 1 of his friends d and d showed me i took it from d and folded it up and put it in my pocket i then took it to the princeipl do u think that was a good idea
That probably wasn't a great idea. Now 'A' is going to get in trouble for threatening 'B' and they're going to blame it on you. If 'A' is your friend, you should have tried talking to him instead of going to an authority figure that will undoubtedly blow it out of proportion. Your intentions are good because you don't want 'A' and 'B' to get into a fight, but now there is just going to be more drama and you'll be dragged into it.
Darby
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like when a guy fancies you, do his pupils get bigger? and is it ALWAYS like that ? cause like im scared this guy doesnt like me cause his pupils stayed small :/ but we werent really that near, there was like 4 feet between us. :/
Pupil size doesn't have anything to do with whether or not a guy likes you. If his pupils do get bigger, it's probably because you're closer to him and blocking out light, which makes his pupils dilate.
Darby(:
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and how does it help?
It helps with most problems, yes. You vent and get all of your feelings out. Once they're out in the open, you can sort them out better than when they're jumbled in your head. Plus you have a third party that can help you plan a course of action to make the problem better. Sometimes you can't see a situation or the solution to a problem when you're actually involved in the situation. A third party can see things how they really are and let you know what everyone's point of view is.
Darby(:
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to get over a guy i was with for 9 months. i still think about him when im not busy. i try to stay busy and since our break up i went on one date, which was like hell because he talked about his ex. lol but i need to get over my ex because i know he has already got over me, he told me himself. i dont look at our old pictures, i dont look at his myspace page, i dont call or text him or look at old memories of us. i just want to stop hurting.
Think about the things you learned throughout your relationship. Think of the reasons why you broke up and the negatives that he had. Get an image of a new and improved guy in your head. It's good that you've gone on one date (but it sucks that he talked about his ex :p). Now you need to just keep trying. You've been keeping busy and whatnot, but you need to try to just have fun for now. Date around, don't get in anything serious yet. Hang out with new people and have a good time. Now you have no one that's going to get angry with you for talking to guys or just going out and having a good time with friends.
Most people have been through the difficult breakup at one point or another. Sooner or later you're going to think about him and realize that it's the first time you've thought about him in a few days, in a week, in a couple weeks, in a month, etc...
Allow yourself time to get over him and don't think of your memories as a negative thing. Right now it's hard to think about, but eventually it will be a casual thing of the past. When you do find yourself thinking of him, try to write down your feelings. Don't try to push away thoughts of him because they'll just keep coming back, but on the other hand, don't let yourself think of him nonstop. You'll find someone much better and he'll just be a distant memory.
Darby(:
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how can you tell when your having sex, if the guy is a virgin?
and how can you tell when your having sex if the girls a virgin? (without them telling you obv)
There is no surefire way to tell if a girl/guy is a virgin. If a girl bleeds or is in a lot of pain, it can be assumed she is a virgin (or maybe the guy is just big). With a guy, there definitely is no way to tell for sure. But if he seems extremely experienced or knows exactly what he's doing, he's probably not a virgin. But none of these things show 100% whether they're a virgin or not. The only way to know if they're a virgin is by asking them, and even then, they could lie.
Darby(:
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Hi i have a problem with under arm sweat. everytime i put on deodorant it makes my armpits smell bad and i sweat. i use that clinical strengh stuff and that works but i forget to put it on at night alot of the time. i could be in a cold room and my armpits would still sweat and nothing else. even when im freezing it sweats. all of my shirts have sweat marks on them! please help!! thank you. PS if anyone knows how to get the stain out of clothes that would be very nice of you to answer!! thank you!!
You need to get prescription antiperspirant. Deodorant just makes your armpits smell better. Antiperspirant makes your armpits not perspire so much.
Also, to get rid of pit stains, use white vinegar. Rub the white vinegar on the stains and let it sit for about ten minutes. After that, wash the stains with very hot water. Then do a normal washing cycle.
If that doesn't work, baking soda mixed with water can be used in place of white vinegar.
Darby(:
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[[Sorry so lond]] Well I moved to californa last month and stared school like 4 weeks ago so im new and i go to school with my cosuin and i like this kid a lot i've kinda been talking to him on myspace sometime when i lived in New mexico so we kinda new each other becuse my cousin .but he likes another girl a lot but she dosent like him should i tell him i like him or wait, tell him face to face or tell my firend to tell him....??
If I were you, I would wait a little while before telling him. Be his friend and be there for him when he gets rejected by the girl he likes. I'm assuming she will reject him since she doesn't like him. In the meantime, you can hit on him a little bit. The most important thing is to be dependable and be there for him to talk to when he gets upset. He'll start getting the hint that you like him.
Then, when he gets over the crush on this girl, you can go the rest of the way with telling him. That is, assuming he doesn't already pick on it by then.
Darby(:
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okay this is gonna sound soo embrassing!
well my and my fella have been togther for over4 and abit months.. and were teenagers..
a couple of days ago he fingered me.. and my days it felt gooooooooodd!
but he wants me to give him a hand job... how do i do that ?
I cant imagine myself doing that! do you think i can do anything else to him .. or he do anything to me, so i can get out of it? .. or shall i go for it?
If you think i should go for it .. how do i like.. get in the moment, and do my stuff?? =]
You'll eventually have to just go for it. I don't know if you're just nervous or scared that you're not going to do it right, but it's not difficult at all. Just put your hand around it, not too tightly and not too loosely. Then move your hand up and down, it's very repetitive and gets boring quickly. You'll know that you're doing something right (or wrong) by his reaction. But don't worry, you'll only have to do it for a couple minutes before you get the hang of it.
Also, of course, if you're not comfortable or don't feel ready to do it, don't. Just tell your boyfriend that you're not ready to do that quite yet. If he's a good boyfriend and is serious about you, he'll wait.
But I think it sounds like you're just a tad bit nervous, which is completely normal.
Good luck!
Darby(:
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