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Q: ME 19/F HIM24/M we have been togethe for 3 yearsand we live together at hismoms house and well we have been rough patches andall but we mde it throughhe justu tgot this new job making 4 grand every month but the bad thing is hes gone from like 6 in the morning to like 10 or 11 at night i nver get to see him rally anymore and hes so tiredwhen h ges home hedoesnt want t be held on or doesnt want to do anything physical well my job i only mad lik emaybe 6 or 650 in a month so h wanted me to quit so i could find abetter job and we could move out ad get a place together so i go to my job quit come hom gt job interviews lined up and all so we have a wonderful day that day cause he had it off and we were having a great day emotionally and physically lol well the next day i go out with my friends in hi car which he knew about a week in advance! WELL I GET HOME ROUND 1:30AM.WELLHES MAD AT ME SAYING I SHOULD HVE TOOK MY CAR BUT I COULNT CAUS IT DOESNT HAVE A TAG YET WELL HE SAID HE COULNT GO ANYWHERE IF HE WNATED AND WHATEVER WELL THE NEXT DAY I FIND OUT HE HAD WENT OUT TO THE BOWLING ALLEY WITH HIS FRIEND AND HIS FRIENDS GF THAT I DO NOT LIKE! SO I GET MAD AND AK HIM HYD H MAKE ME FEEL BAD THAT I WENT OUT WITH HIS CAR WHEN HE WAS OUT ALL NIGHT TOO AND SO THEN HE GETS MA SAYING I NEVER LET HIM DO WHAT HE WANTS AND STUFF WELL THEN HE ENDS UP GOING OUT AGAIN WITH THEM 2 ADN STAYING GONE ALL NGIHT COMESHOME THE NEXT DAY IN HE AFTERNOON AT 2 AND LEAVE AGAIN COMES HOM LIKE AT 12 MIDNIGT WELL HES TELLING ME HE DOESNT NAT TO BE WITH ME THATHE LOVES ME ANDALL BUT I BITCH AT HIM TOO MUCH ABOU EVERYTHINGANDHE DOESNT WAN TO COME HOME AND HAVE TO HEAR THAT AND THAT I CAN STILL STAY HERE HE CAN HELP ME AND CAN HELP HIM BUT NOT IN A RELATIONSHIOP AND THE REASON WHY HE HASNT ASKED ME TO MARRY HIM IS CAUSE I TRY T O WEAR THE PANTS IN THE RELATIONSHIP AS IT IS AND JUST THINK WHT ITD BE LIKE IF IWAS HIS WIFE AND ALL THIS THT HE DONT WNAT ME TO HATE HIM HE JUST CANT B IN A RELATIONSHIP RIGHT NOW ITS TOO MUCH STRESS.THAT W TRIED AND WE FAILED HE WONT EVEN LET ME TOUCH HIM I HAD TO CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP WE SLEPT IN THE SAM EBED BUT I COULDNT TOUCH HIM AND THEN IN THE MIDDLE TH ENIGTH HE WS HOLDING ME S TGHT AND STUFF AND IT JUSTHURTS ME SO BAD HE IS MAKIGN IT SEEM LIEK I DO EVERYTHING WRONG IN THIS RELATIONSHIOP AND HES SOO PERFECT ALL IWANT ISSOME ATTENTION ONCE IN AWHILE I MEAN DAMN IS THAT TOOO HARD TO ASK FOR? I DOTN UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD I WANT TO STAY HERE AND US HELP EACHOTER BUT NO BE WITH HIM? ITS TUPID AS SIT I EMAN COME THE FUCK ON SHOULD I TRYAAND MAKE THIS WORK OR SHOULD I JUST GET OVR HI? SOMEONE OLEAE HELP I MKNOW THIS SI REALLLY LOG IM SORRY HES AT WORK AND IM SITTING HERE LISTENIGN TO COUTNRY CRYING S YEHA PLEASE HELP ME I NE DADVICE.THANX

You really do not type like a 19 year old. Seriously, if you want advice, consider spell check because as much as I want to help, I'm not reading through that big run on sentence. Sorry.

Q: do you like george bush?

Wow, thank God someone deleted this. This isn't homework help either.

Hmmm interesting you ask, because this is actually an advice column, not a politics discussion. So I definitely do not think this question should be asked.

But, half the answers you'll get here are no. And sure, everyone is entitled to their opinions, but like him or not, he's the president and everyone should respect the president. It's just the decent thing to do. But sadly, people don't do that.

Q: My boyfriend's ex has been so mean to me lately sayng they're going out and this one person told me I shouldn't believe her because she lies soo much and she is just jealous. My boyfriends mom also told me that shes bad news and that she's been giving them a hard time lately.

Well.

Apparently, so many people have told me today they were making out. So apparently he is cheating on me. I really liked this guy but I guess it was fake. What should I say to him? I'm really devastated...

I really hope that your boyfriend didn't cheat on you, but if you know this girl lies, then you should really tell your boyfriend how you feel.

Tell him that you've been getting a lot of the same stories from different people and it's upsetting you to hear and have no idea what to believe.

An idea that might work is if your boyfriend denies making out with this girl, he should tell her this to her face in front of you so that you will be able to see her reaction to this.

And the next time she confronts you or tells you another story, you should just say, "I really don't care, so leave me alone" and then walk away. If you really feel like they did do something, then maybe you are better off ending it. Just be careful, because you really don't know whose lying, just go with your gut.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: The only way I know how to handle an argument with my husband is to ignor him and sleep in the other room, he does not care or listen to a word I say and our communication sucks. We do not want a divorce so about twice a month this we ignor and I sleep in another room until we both feel comfortable with each other again and then two weeks later we do the same thing again, he also holds me down with money, because I am a stay at home mom and I am not to worried with that because my name is on the account, although he does threaten to take all of the money out and leave with nothing, need I say this is ONLY a threat and he never follow thru, I know its a cyle we are going thru and I am fed up!!! By the way we have a 4 year old that we try real hard to not involve her but I know she is effect and it breaks my heart. My husband throws out all the time that he wants out of this marriage but he does nothing and then in a few days he acts like nothing is wrong, how can that be?? I am not going to say I am incoscent in all of this, but I am the only one who is seeking help! Female 38

Well, if you continue to handle arguments the way you both do, then you are on the edge of your marriage.

I really don't know about marriage since I'm not married, but I do know that ignoring and not communicating the problems will pile and pile until one of you finally scream divorce.

On a time when you both are available, and not fighting, you need to say, 'listen, we're married now, we can't ignore each other just because we don't agree. I love you and I'm more than willing to make you and I both happy and figuring out a way for us to settle this without getting a divorce and without effecting our child' or something along those lines.

I imagine the only way to really begin a good way to settle fights is counseling. It's not a bad thing, it's a way of trying to save your marriage and your child. It's not stupid, or admitting your helpless, but you both should consider a little more help if you can't manage.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: Hi.. umm well basically i think im in love with my bestfriend. but hes a dick! ok this is wat happened. he have been best friends for like 1 year and a bit and he cronically flirted with me and even kissed me! and then he goes out with some other girl, then i decide to try get over him and be happy for him.. and then just as im liking this really nice guy, he tells me that he really likes me.. so im like ok ive liked you for ages! and so we kinda get going.. then he feels bad about his old gf so he tells me he cant get with me atm because its only lust not love. then after he completely breaks up with his ex.. i assumed he would u know.. get goin with me agen.. but no. he starts going out with another girl AFTER hooking into one of my friends at a party and AFTER flirting with me when we went out to a movie. i really dont know what to do. he doesnt get that he is the first thought when i wake up in the morning.. and the last at night. he knows how i feel.. i cant seem to like other guys because my feelings for him are really strong. what can i do to get over him without losing him as a best friend? please help (btw sory this was so long)

First off, I know how you feel to think about someone all the time, constantly and it hurts. But, from what you're telling me, he doesn't deserve to be on your mind like this for being a jerk and giving you mixed messages.

He knows how you feel and if he's not going to respond to that, then moving on is what you have to do. When he says that it's only lust and not love, don't take that lightly. That was probably a true statement and you shouldn't consider this guy again IF he tries again with you.

As for how to move on while staying friends is the impossible part. You can act happy for him, act happy around him, but sadly all you'll be doing for a while is acting with him. Because when the truth comes out, thats how friendships fall apart. I'm not saying you'll never get to be friends again, but for now keep your distance without completely shutting him out unless you want to act all the time.

I have some tips that I made by myself for getting over someone, but it's for more of a break-up so you don't have to do everything on it since this wasn't a break-up.

1- Distractions: When you find yourself really depressed and upset, turn on the TV or go for a walk. Go to the gym and workout or anything that takes your mind away.

2- Venting: There are times when you won't be able to take your mind away as easily. So you have to just deal with the feelings in your own way possible. Write in a journal, cry, call a friend, go walking, listening to a favorite song and sing until you can't anymore.

3- Limiting: It's ok to have days where you stay at home and be alone, but you have to limit those days. Staying at home in your bed may feel good every once in a while, but it won't if you do it repeatedly. Spend a lot of time out with friends or family members. Even if you feel horrible the entire time, it's worth it.

4- Dating again: You might be thinking that just because you don't have a girlfriend or boyfriend anymore you have to start searching immediately for another. That isn't true. You have to start dating again when you feel ready. Which could be a very long time.

I really hoped this helped and if you want anymore advice or have anymore questions I'm here:)

-TheTeenGirl

Q: so does naybody know that song on the commerical witht he nintendo ds where there strumming the guitar on it...and everybodys singing to it...i think theres a guy on the bus and a group of people sitting in the grass. thanks!

'Santeria' by Sublime:)

-TheTeenGirl

Q: 18 Male

Hey what are some ideas that would make me look really good. Also I play a lot of sports so what are some ideas that would make me look good while playing them.

Well, thats a bit tough to answer but I'll try my best:)

I think looking your best is just being clean, keeping up with personal hygiene (Brush teeth, shower daily). Maybe try gel in your hair if you haven't already?

Personally, I prefer guys to have their face shaved and not wait for a while until it's stubbly and looks a little strange. But thats me, I think a clean face looks more like the guy takes care of himself more.

For playing sports, I think hair should be short and kept cut. I mean usually the guys with long hair are the 'skaters' but I could really see a turn off watching a guy with long hair pulled back playing sports, it's just weird honestly. So I prefer short hair for sports.

Hmmm, with sports, maybe good shoes? Good shoes are nice. Clean clothes. Cologne, good smelling cologne is pretty nice in a guy too.

I hope this helps, I really tried:)

-TheTeenGirl

Q: sorry its me again but whatever link message you were giving me on "my luck sucks", which im guessin was a proxy cauz its blocked with the same thing that myspace.com is blocked with..... do you have any other brillant ideas?

Ok, I remember now:)

Hmmm honestly proxies are all I know I mean I really don't know Firefox all that well to try and unblock websites, I really think it has to do with something that maybe they downloaded, like a different type of firewall maybe?

But heres another one if you want to try it:

http://proxypimps.com/

Anyway I'm sorry I'm not much of help:(

-TheTeenGirl

Q: my parents have blocked one of my fav web site and wont unblock it no matter how much i ask them. so is there any way to unblock or get ride of firewalls on Mozilla Firefox? one more ? how do you get a site off the ban list on Mozilla Firefox? please give easy to follow directions cauz im a blonde?

Thats silly, being blonde has nothing to do with it:)

Anyway I actually have this website that might work:

http://anonymouse.org/anonwww.html
[Just type the URL and it should work]

If it doesn't work, let me know!

-TheTeenGirl

Q: where do we find the public version of our facebook profile? like people from other networks can see it but its not your actual profile.. tis like it

If you mean like a layout or like a design on myspace, Facebook doesn't do that. It's just a plain white and blue profile with the main picture. So basically the part other people see is when you click 'Profile'.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: Does anyone know of a website where you can post anything that you want, and people can reply, and you can read the reply? I'm looking for something like the post secrets application on facebook, without using facebook. ( haha ). I', 13/f

I'm not sure exactly what you mean but there is a site that can come in handy.

LiveJournal.com.

It's like a diary except on the internet. The only thing really is that your friends have to be a Livejournal user to reply and everything. It's like having a facebook, they have to be on Facebook to actually read it.

Hope that helped:)

-TheTeenGirl

Q: Hi TeenGirl,
thanks very much for your previous response...it seems to be running in line with most of what I've heart, therefore it must be good advice...what I would like some more help on is the issue of my grandmother...as I said, she is very ill and it is quite apparent that she does not have much longer...should I let him know this? I would not want to see the regret a person would have if they knew they broke up with someone and ignored them in the midst of the person's grandmother on the verge of passing away....thoughts?

I'm really sorry, but could you link me to your previous question? I'm pretty bad with remembering but just send me the link and I'll answer your question:)

Q: I had been a 4 year relationship.... he just said he "had enough" last week. It was constant fighting and those stupid little break ups every week...for some reason though, we always got back together and I really did love him a lot...he was definetely the bad boy type, and I was the "smart girly" type I guess you could say...he and I both had our shares of infidelity, though I made my mistakes early on, and he carried them out until January of this year...he's been physical at times and apparently I've been a bitch at times...my grandmother is very ill right now and he's basically abandoned me....why can't I get over him and have the urge to call so bad...how can I overcome this?

It's really hard to even start answering your question because I'm just in awe at how exact we both are. I was with someone for 4 years and he broke up with me only a few days before the 4 year anniversary. So I can relate so much to the feeling of the urges and abandonment you feel. Except he never ever, got physical with me.

Overcoming something like this is knowing and accepting the truth. If he seriously ended it, you have to come to terms with the fact that your life will go on with or without him. And if he continues later on going on without you, it only brings you the opportunity to catch up with friends, family, or just the other part of your life you missed out on. It also takes you to a new world of being single, not having to constantly worry about calling someone or staying out too late or just being with another guy.

You also have to realize that you can be the biggest bitch on earth to him and you can call him every name in the book, there will never be a name when it's ok for him to ever hit you or push you. So, it doesn't matter what you did, it's wrong.

It can't be him whose ending it. You should be the one who says, "I don't deserve this, I'm ending it."

I have some pretty well thought out tips on dealing with a break-up:

1- Distractions: When you find yourself really depressed and upset, turn on the TV or go for a walk. Go to the gym and workout or anything that takes your mind away.

2- Venting: There are times when you won't be able to take your mind away as easily. So you have to just deal with the feelings in your own way possible. Write in a journal, cry, call a friend, go walking, listening to a favorite song and sing until you can't anymore.

3- Limiting: It's ok to have days where you stay at home and be alone, but you have to limit those days. Staying at home in your bed may feel good every once in a while, but it won't if you do it repeatedly. Spend a lot of time out with friends or family members. Even if you feel horrible the entire time, it's worth it.

4- Dating again: You might be thinking that just because you don't have a girlfriend or boyfriend anymore you have to start searching immediatly for another. That isn't true. You have to start dating again when you feel ready. Which could be a very long time.

I hope that everything I've said has helped in some way. But I will give you some sites too since that's what you really wanted.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=455195

you're fucking psycho.
like,
srsly i'm the one who asked that question & even though i was so caught up on him thinking i wouldn't ever find anyone else. you responding with that. is psychotic.

don't tell me to get over myself.

you're clearly the one whose obsessed, i'm not going to sympathize for you because of your three year relationship thanks. so don't bore me with your life issues.
cunt

Heh? What? WOW lets check the date on that...

October 27th, 2006?

Ohh man. Still going for this guy? Hmmm wow.

Don't bore ME with your life that keeps repeating.

Me, ask you for sympathy? Eh not ever.

Q: well this is sorta hard to write about because it hurts a lot. And I'm always worried that people will just tell me that it wil change and stuff. That's really not what I want to hear. I dont mean to sound mean but I'm VERY sensitive about this subject and will make me cry if someone says something rude about it or myself. Sorry im just really emotional about this situation. Well today in school .wow. this is really stupid. But here it goes. today in school my ex best friend who talks to me every once in a while but has switched to a new friend. Now she talks to her new friend Abby all the time and it makes me want to cry. Because I don't understand what happened between us that now she wants another friend and I'm old to her. We used to hang out as much as possible. all the time. now she's hanging out with abby. as stupid as this sounds it makes me cry every time she talks to Abby instead of me. Well anyways Abby had a party today. And of course I wasn't invited but she had a really mean way of saying I couldnt come. She was like no one at my party knows you and you'll be a really left out. and then she said we are not friends anyways. So yeah I went in the bathroom at school and cried for at least 15 mins. I was soo upset and I still dont know why. I mean ok my ex best friend doesnt want anything to do with me anymore. So ill just deal. But that's not where it ends. I just feel like everyone doesnt like me because im me. I'm stupid and ugly. Well people say im beautiful. but girls that are really pretty usually have a million friends. I went through this last year. nobody liked me anymore and they still dont want to hang. I really am lost here. I think i'll lose a lot of weight and then kill myself. I'm over thinking that guys and girls will start liking me. Never gonna happen. even when I'm in 10th grade. Everything wil be the same. guys wont like me and girls wont either.

Awww, well no wonder you're so sensitive and depressed. You think you're stupid and ugly, you really have low self-esteem.

You have to really accept that you are a person and you deserve happiness and love, just like everyone else. And if some people don't agree with that, those are people who really value themselves too much and are selfish.

Theres definitely no such thing as being too sensitive to your ex best friend meeting a new friend who ditches you. It's wrong of her and she should be the one depressed because she's leaving you behind. And you seem like a great girl with a great personality. Honestly, I've been in this situation, so I have a pretty good idea of the way you feel right now.

The reason you feel so depressed and you're shutting out is because thats the first easy thing you can do. Is closing the doors and not letting anyone in, that way, you can't get hurt again. But, eventually you have to make new friends that are better and you will. But it takes a lot of confidence. You have to treat yourself like you deserve better friends. If you walk around saying you're not smart and unattractive, people will treat you that way and take advantage of you.

The best way of helping yourself feel better is talking to someone. Being open is a great way to make friends and relieve stress. You can start with a counselor, parent, other friends, family, therapist. It might take a ton of time, but it'll definitely be worth it.

I also want to say that, If you can't find anyone to talk to, I am here. All you have to do is drop me something in my inbox and I will talk to you about anything you're open to talking to. I hope things get better for you.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: is it possible to fall in love online? or maybe, ...perhaps even like a best friend type of love? is it ridiculous if you've known the person for a long time?
15/f

Hmm wow that answer that says it's not possible really upsets me.

Speaking from experience, I have been in love with someone over the internet. We were together for 4 years and went very strong. Yes, it ended, but it had nothing to do with the fact that we wanted other people.

Online love definitely is not a shallow love, it can be pretty powerful, but rare. It's just so rare that you'll find a great guy who won't be cheating or dong things you won't ever know. I don't encourage it, I tell you to be careful and very patient.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: my face is so ugly. i have bad skin even though i've been using proactiv for almost 3 yrs, (i'm 18) i have laugh lines, my cheeks are fat. any tips on how to make my face prettier? i get so jealous whenever i see ppl on tv like kristin cavalleri

I'm not sure if your face is as bad as you're making it, but don't go as low as calling yourself ugly, I'm sure you have a very beautiful face under your acne.

But if it is really that bad, have your parents or guardian take you to the dermatologist and see what they can do.

If for some reason you can't see a Dermatologist, here are a few steps that can help acne stay away:

* Be sure to pull your hair away from your skin when you sleep.

* Try to shower as soon as possible after your workout since sweat combined with skin oils can trap dirt and bacteria in your pores.

* Don’t go to bed with makeup on. It can clog your pores and lead to breakouts.

* Make sure to clean cosmetic brushes regularly in soapy water and throw out old, contaminated makeup.

* Use topical treatments, such as Nature's Cure Vanishing Cream, anywhere that you tend to get breakouts -- don't just spot-treat existing pimples. The pore-clogging process happens two to three weeks before any blemish becomes visible on the skin.

* Drink at least 64 ounces of water a day to help "detoxify" the body from the inside out.

Found at PioneerThinking

-TheTeenGirl

Q: 15/f. I'm not interested in dating right now, and I like someone way older. How do you make yourself get over it ?

The best way of getting over this older guy is telling yourself the reality of your situation. When you think about how much you want him, remind yourself that it will never happen because you both are in two different worlds.

Try finding a few new guys to crush on. You don't have to date them, but that way if you ever decide you want to date, you'll be crushing on someone whose available and it won't seem impossible.

-TheTeenGirl

Q: I have Animation Shop 3. Once in a while, I'll have a problem where I will create an animation with 2 diff pictures and on each picture the text is a diff color so when you play the animation the text flashes, but sometimes when it flashes these fuzz things appear all over the words and they look really bad, its like random pixels or something. NO idea whats wrong, PLEASE HELP!!!!!

I have Animation shop 3 and I've had this problem before, and sadly I haven't yet found a solution. Maybe you could try redownloading it?

But I know this problems really sucks, and I'm sure theres a solution out there. I know this doesn't help, but good luck:(

-TheTeenGirl

Q: I want to create a Layout site but I want mine to be more attention catching.

I was wondering where I can find sites that can make my pictures look like these:

http://a266.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/65/m_1006e2c1ad3918aef069935f433556c1.png
http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb71/jlynn_007/welcomecv2.jpg
http://a968.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/66/m_d9bee53a896889797b73faaea50d6157.jpg
http://a170.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/78/m_98fe0bc84490eaea9d29cf7ddda69209.png
http://a305.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/88/m_a17ec0f6a1aae6270ca8c7ea847a94a0.jpg
http://a149.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/80/m_8a7078d9fa4e27557abf0018da4434e4.jpg

yeah, you get the picture.
Does anyone know where I can go to find sites that I can edit my photos to look like these?

Thanks!

It's not a website or any of that.You have to download different programs.

And let me tell you that it takes TONS of time to actually start making good banners and graphics and such. I've been doing graphic making for 3 years and I'm still learning more and more about it.

So, you have a few options. Just Google these three keywords:

Paint Shop Pro 7
Paint Shop Pro 8
Paint Shop Pro 9
Animation Shop 3 (to make animated graphics)

-TheTeenGirl

bio

My name is Erin and I am now 18 years old. You may realize through out looking at my column, some of you love me and some of you flat out hate me. There's really no gray area with me I guess you can say.

I haven't given advice here in so long and it's only because I got caught up in life. But I'm more mature than I ever thought I could be.
So anyway I'm here again. It's been a long time, but I still love giving advice and still plan on it in the future.

Everyone should feel free to Private Message me for advice, I can be harsh, but I'm always trying to help someone by giving them the truth they need.

About My Ratings:
I enjoy ratings. And if I ask a question on here, I always rate the person. If you work hard to give advice, you deserve to be rated.