Am a bit of a wrinkly now (i was 24 on 4/9/05, but I had the best birthday I've ever had in my whole entire life!!!) but I know an awful of stuff about an awful lot of stuff!
I am COMPLETELY NON-JUDGEMENTAL and you can always inbox me with stuff you wouldn't ask anyone else @ MelanieHarvey81@Hotmail.Com
Mel xxx
"Dance like no one is watching and love like you've never been hurt"
E-mail: MelanieHarvey81@Hotmail.Com
Gender: Female
Location: Long story, born in Germany, Parents are Spanish but grew up in the UK!!!
Occupation: General Superstar and all around heroine!
Age: 24
Member Since: December 24, 2004
Answers: 356
Last Update: July 20, 2007
Visitors: 25973
Main Categories:
Love Life
General Sex Questions
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okay, i didn't know what category to put this in, but what does irony mean?, i looked up the definition on dictionary.com and i didnt understand it, so could someone, explain it to me better.. thanks (link)
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Hi there,
Irony is a state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often amusing as a result!
Or that's what the Oxford dictionary describe it as!
The best way I can describe it is by using some of the lyrics from Alanis Morisettes song "Ironic"
"An old man turned 98, won the lottery - and died the next day"
"Mr.Play-It-Safe was afraid to fly, He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye, He waited his whole damn life to take that flight, And as the plane crashed down he thought"Well, isn't this nice."
"A traffic jam when you're already late"
"A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break"
"It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife"
"It's meeting the man of my dreams...And then meeting his beautiful wife!"
That is the best way I can describe it. It is when something is not as you would expect and can be funny.
I:e Buffy the vampire slaer! You would not expect a Vampire slayer to have such a girly name as Buffy and it's quite funny!
IF you are still confused gimme a shout!
Take care
Mel
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do you always bleed the first time you have sex and if you do is it really awkward if youre like..bleeding? and how do you know if your hymen is already been torn by a tampon or something? can it still bleed during sex if it is already torn? (link)
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Hiya,
No not everybody bleeds the first time they have intercourse.
The hymen can already be broken for any number of reasons unrelated to sexual intercourse. Horseback riding or gymnastics can cause the hymen to tear, it can also separate by inserting a tampon, when the body is stretched strenuously, like in sports and sometimes it will tear for no apparent reason at all!
Some other hymen facts are: It is a thin membrane that surrounds the vaginal opening. It only partially blocks the opening.
Hymens come in many different shapes and sizes, but should never block the vaginal opening completely.
It is possible that a woman's hymen will never break and there are women who are born without a hymen!
If the hymen was whole at one point and torn, then it will not grow back. Even if your hymen breaks through other activities (other than sex), you are still considered a virgin (if you have not had sexual intercourse).
While it is common for some slight bleeding and slight pain to accompany the separation of the hymen, many girls experience the process without even noticing it.
Hope this helps!!
Take Care
Mel
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OK, So I've read a article about not douching. It says that it takes longer for women to get pregnant and even when they do they have a higher chance of having a etopic pregnancy. Also it stated that you can get bacterial vaginosis (Kind of like a yeast infection) easier. This sucks after reading it because I ahve always douched. I don't ever FEEL clean until I do. Which is once a week or week and a 1/2. Can I empty the contents of the bottle and just use water? Is that any less harmful or about the same? (link)
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Hiya,
Douching is not accepted as an effective form of birth control, doctors discourage it as a method of birth control as it can sometimees PUSH the sperm further into your uterus!
Some reports have concluded that douching is harmful and should be discouraged because of its association with pelvic inflammatory disease, ectopic pregnancy, and perhaps other conditions.
Most women douche in an to attempt to cleanse the vaginal area, this is probably not a good idea. The vagina has its own natural cleaning system that flushes out bacteria. So not only do the chemicals and perfumes in feminine sprays and douches not help, they can actually cause problems like allergic reactions or infections in the vagina.
The best thing you can do is leave your body to do what it is meant to and take frequent baths.
Take care.
Mel xx
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Tell me please, what is the best way to deal with adult children who live destructive lives? Is it ever okay to say "I have had enough and I want you out of my life" I mean I love my son and couldn't deal with that well, but I can't deal with this either. He's lazy, won't work and is in an abusive relationship. He's on probation for an old charge, but is likely to screw up again if he keeps going this way. He refuses counseling, but has no money or a job anyway. I cannot do tough love, and I don't even know if that really works after talking to other parents. I love him I really do, but he (and his gf) are hurting the rest of our family. Anyone been there? (link)
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Hiya,
I have been there. Not as the Mother but as the sister of a boy (as I still can't bring myself to call him a man)
He sounds very similar to your son. He was lazy, wouldn't work, smoked cannabis all day, was abusive to my Mother and younger brother.
My Mom tried everything she possibly could to straighten him out but why would he want to do that when she will support him/ feed him/ clothe him etc
In the end it got so bad that the only option was what my Mom now calls "Short Sharp Shock treatment"
He stole money from my little brothers piggy bank which, I think, was the straw that broke the camels back, and she rented a room in a hostel for him, paid for it upfront for a month and packed his things. (He even had the cheek to ask her for a lift!!!!) She told him not to contact her or any member of our family until he had got a job, stopped smoking weed and found himself a permanent place to live.
It broke my Moms heart having to do that to her Son but it was for the greater good of everyone else in our house and also in the long-run it will be for my brother.
I'm not saying he's perfect now but 8 months down the line he's got a job and moved into a small flat of his own, he still has a long way to go but it was probably the best thing she ever did for him and for my little brother who was picking up Scott's habits.
Whatever you do I hope it all works out.
Take Care
Mel
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this seemed like the best column to me, sry if it's not in the right place.
i have serious trouble sleeping. for example, right now it's midnight and i am dead tired. so far i've layed down to go to sleep about 4 or 5 times. every time i do, within 15 to 30 minutes i start to feel very restless. i toss and turn, i try different positions, i sit up and lay back down, and various other things. what should i do? should i go so far as to see a doctor?
~anonamousadviceseeker (link)
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Hi there,
I used to have real trouble sleeping and there were a few things I did that really helped.
1) No excersize or vigorouis activity 4 hours before bed.
2)Take a long hot/cool (depending on the weather!) bath with loads of bubbles (try anything with lavender and chamomile they help to unwind you.)
3)get into clean fresh pj's
4)have a mug of warm milk with honey.
5)When you get into bed darken the room and make it as quiet as possible!
Other things I do are: Make sure I go to bed at the same time each night and wake up at the same time in the morning, this way your body gets into a routine and by 11pm when I go to bed my body is tired and expecting sleep.
If I am having a articularly bad night and I can't sleep I get up. Stretch my muscles, wlak around for 5 minutes then go back to bed and try again!
Sleeping pills have more side effects than Google has searches so I tend not to take them, but if you are having real trouble and it starts to affect your daytime life then speak to your parents who could maybe get you to see a sleep therapist or doctor to see whether you have any medical reasons for not being able to relax/sleep at night.
Take Care
Mel xx
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I have thick hair. when it dries, it dries really bad (its hard to explain...its kind of puffy/ wavy/ frizzy) bottom line..its a mess. But i dont always have time to straighten it. i dont care if its not straight...i just want it to look nice. Is there any products or ideas to help control my hair???
PLEASE HELP! (link)
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Ah! I know exactly how you feel!
Somedays I get up and look like an electrocuted poodle!
depending on how much time you have depends on what you can do with it.
If I have 20 mins I wash it and scruch dry it with a load of curl boost mousse, so I get bouncy curls that last a whole day.
If I have 10 minutes I put it in a ponytail put Frizz-Ease hair serum by John Frieda on it and just straighten the pony tail!!
If I have less than 10 minutes (which happens occassionally!) then I put it in a bun!
There are lots of products out there that promise the "ultiamte straight look" but not all of them work!
What I normally do is buy something when it is on offer so that it doesn't cost a bomb then try it out.
TC
Mel xx
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i dont think this is the right category but w/e. Im trying to upload a pic on to advicenators but no matter how small i make it it always says "You tried to upload a picture, but it was greater than 15K in filesize so it wasn't uploaded." what is "URL of a picture of you" (link)
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Hiya,
A URL is the address of a web page on the world wide web.
Do you have any pictures of you at all posted on the internet?
If so copy and paste the link and it will upload it.
Simple, if you get stuck though please feel free to e-Mail me!
TC
Mel xx
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Okay. I was at my friends house and we took her parent's smirnoffs and drank them. Her mom found out and said that if I don't tell my parents about it then my friend's grounding will be even longer. What should i tell my parents? They are really strict about everything. Thanks (link)
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If I were you I would definitely tell them.
As soon as possible because it sounds to me like your friends parents will tell them if you don't!
If her parents get to them and tell them before you do then you are more likely to get a stricter punishment than if you had told them in the first place.
Good luck and hope you don't get too much of a roasting although you should leave the alcohol til you are old enough!!
TC
Melxx
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The bar at the bottom of the screen (the one with the windows, the start option, etc.) has been made vertical and is up against the left side of my screen. There is only a left right arrow for making it bigger sideways, and there is not one for verticalness. I want it to be back at the bottom of the screen like usual.
Any help would be hugely appreciated. (link)
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Just drag it towards the bottom and it'll be back to normal in no time!
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im trying to find a new way of funking up my room. ive got loads of products like make up and hair stuff that i need to find storage for. i want somewhere i can display them but im bored of the original things like shelves which i already have 3 of full of stuff.
Also i have loads of belts that are draping over my wardrobe stick leaving little room for my clothes
so can any one give me any ideas of how to make unusual storage for my make up products? but some where they can be seen.
and also some ideas for my belts. (link)
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Hi there,
You could get some see-thru pvc boxes to put your make-up in. Different sizes and then stack them on top of each other - that's what I do with mine!
With my belts I bought a load of sticky plastic t-towel hooks and stuck them all over the back of my bedroom door then hung the belts on those!
Looks really cool, it's really cheap and if you don't like it then they are easy to take off. Also when you buy more belts you just stick moe on!
Hope this helps!
Mel
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I want to make my room really cool.
I have a blue comforter, pink egg chair, and blue curtains in my room. I want to make it more decorative without making it look cluttered. Does anyone have any ideas that I could make at home, or get stuff at like a drug store. I have white christmas lights wrapped over my closet so its pretty cool. My room is somewhat big, and is filled with wood furniture. If you have any ideas, please help. (link)
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Hiya,
One of the cheapest ways that you could make it look VERY different is if you stain all of the wood furniture in your room.
You could do it ble to match your comforter or oink to match your chair or a combination of the 2.
Just make sure you clear it with your parents before you actually do anything tho!!
Have fun!
Mel
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ok well sometimes like when i workout or just wearing jeans somewhere i dont wear underwear. i just heard the other day though about crabs? is it likely i will get them or already have them if i dont wear underwear sometimes? can someone please give me some info on this..thanks. (link)
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Hi there,
Not wearing underwear will not give you crabs.
The only thing that can give you crabs is if you come into contact with someone else with crabs or you share clothes/towels/a bed with someone who has them.
Don't worry about not earing underwear, no harm will come of it if you don't wear them!
Take care!
Mel
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A little girl was walking in the winter and saw a frozen snake by the side of the road. She took pity on it, and put it in her pocket to warm it up. After a while, the snake warmed up, and bit her in the leg. She said, "Hey, I took care of you, what did you bite me for?" And the snake said, "Well, you knew I was a snake when you picked me up, didn’t you?"
What is the moral of this story? I'm just curious. (link)
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I take it to mean that things are rarely what they seem and that you should be careful who you place your trust in.
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Hey all. Well, I took an entrance exam for this program called the Science & Tech program to get into this good High School (Eleanor Roosevelt High School- in Maryland). This program is pretty competitive because a lot of people apply (somewhere in the thousands) aroung the county and only about 10-15 percent get accepted-250 people or so. I was wondering if my grades are good enough (Math Science Soc. Studies Lang. Arts Only grades counted):
7th grade 8th grade:
Math: B A B A A
Science: A C B A A
Soc. Studies:A B A A A
Lang. Arts: A A B A A
Please tell me if or if not these grades are good enough. Thanks!
(link)
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Hiya!
You won't be able to tell unless you know what grades everybody else got.
You also don't say what the entry requirements are.
They look like pretty good grades to me though!!!
You should be proud of how well you have done!!
GOOD LUCK!!! HOPE YOU GET IN!!!
Mel xx
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does anyone know of any good ways to get better at sight reading? i'm really bad at playing runs [going up or down a scale]. i think it might be because i can't read music as fast as its supposed to be played. does anyone have any advice. thanks (link)
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All I can say is practise, practise, practise!!
I play the flute to grade 8, piano to grade 7 and saxophone to grade 4.
My music teacher used to say to play a piece of music properly you should practise it at least 50 times.
I thought she was a mad old goat, but it turns out she was right!
The more you practise the better your skills will get. I was rubbish at reading music when I first started. Especially with piano where yuo have 2 sometimes 3 different lines to look at!!! But the more I practised the easier it got and the better my music sounded!!!
Just stick with it and one day all of a sudden you will notice the change!
Good Luck!!
Mel
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Does a condom still work ok if you're doing it in the shower? (link)
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Yep!
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Does anybody out there have an Apple laptop or labtop how ever you say it. Because i want to know if they work good.
So on a scale of 1 to 10 rate how good you think yours or someone you konw's works. I might get one for a grad present and i heard they work terribly so i want some opinions.
I'll Rate
thanks and hope you can help (link)
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Hiya!
It entirely depends on what you want the laptop for.
There are loads out there at the minute so probably the best thing you can do is go into an electrical/computer store and have a look at what's on offer.
I can personally recommend the Sony VAIO (BX197XP - Pentium M 760 2.0GHz) as it is the one I got for christmas (thanks Santa!!!) and it does pretty much everything except go to work in the mornings for me!
Take Care
Mel
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Hey I'm doing a science project on making ice cream. I don't understand what this means, so can someone better explain it for me:
"Adding gelatin directly to a warm mix may cause it to turn into a stringy mass. For this reason, recipies call for softening gelatin in a bit of cold liquid, which is then heated and stirred once or twice until the gelatin dissolves. Use either a small saucepan over low heat or a microwave set on high for one minute."
I'm lost on that second sentence and not sure what to do exactly. Any help is appreciated, thanks. (link)
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You have to add the gelatin to cold water, heat it up in a saucepan (I wouldn't use the microwave!) until you can no longer see the gelatin crystals then it's done.
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ok im a 13 f, and have herd about the things (i think there exames...) that u have to get when they stick a tube up.. umm.. "there" is it an option to refuse to do it? thx! i rate 5s!
please no smart remarks.... (link)
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Hi There,
I think what you are refering to is to Cervical Smear (uk) or PAP smear (USA)
A Pap smear is a way to look at a sample of cells taken from a woman's cervix. The test is used to look for changes in the cells of the cervix that show cervical cancer or conditions that may develop into cancer.
All women who are or who have been sexually active, or who have reached age 21, should have an annual Pap smear. It is your best tool to detect pre-cancerous conditions and hidden, small tumors that may lead to cervical cancer. If detected early, cervical cancer can be cured.
As you are only 13 you won't have to worry too much about having one until you are sexually active or 21, whichever is first.
You can always refuse to have pretty much anything done when it comes to your body, I wouldn't advise missing out on these exams when you are old enough to need them though as they are pretty important.
Take Care
Mel
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hey guys. I am 14f, a freshman in high school, and my bf is 15m and a freshman in high school. he is alsmo 16 and i am almost 15. Well, we have been together for about 3 months. I like him alot. For Christmas he got me this necklace and I got him a stuffed animal (a snow tiger because he said it was his favorite..but i accidently thought leoperds were the same thing hehe. but that is another story). So anyways I wanted to know what you guys think I should get him for valentines day. i really dont want to get him another stuffed animal..cause that will be old. do you think he will like jewlery? i dont know if that is appropiate for a guy. i really dont know how to burn cds, so that is out of the questions, and i dont like to take pictures. hehe so does anybody have any ideas? thanks! (link)
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Hiya,
Does he support any particular sports team or have a favourite band?
If so then get him something to do with one of those!
You could also make him an edible card! You can make them with sheets of rice paper, love heart sweets, liquorice laces - anything you can think of really!! To stick things on to rice paper you can use that writing icing stuff!
Hope you have a really good valentines day together!
Mel
xxx
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