Hi, I call myself Ignatz after Dan Herriman's character in the old "Krazy Kat" comic strip. I'm 44, father of 3, husband to one, crazy about music and books and food and movies and history and martial arts. I've had some wild and crazy times in my life, and I figure I might as well put in some of my perspective.
I promise not to talk down to anyone or make fun,and I promise not to BS anyone. If you're old enough to ask a frank question, you're old enough to get a frank answer. Oh, and if you ask me a question directly, please be patient. I'll get back to you as soon as I can. My life's a bit hectic. :-)
Gender: Male
Location: St. Louis, MO
Occupation: Professional dad
Age: 44
Member Since: October 29, 2007
Answers: 328
Last Update: January 23, 2015
Visitors: 35601
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hey there. i'm 21/f and I feel like it's time to move out. I have come here several times to vent and get advice about how to deal with my family. they are extremely overprotective and have no respect for my privacy or my school work. I am in college and studying to be a kindergarten teacher. It's a very time consuming major, as most education majors would know. grant you, we don't have as many exams and things like that, but there are a lot of projects and things like that. At my house, people really have no respect for my school work.
My mom doesn't have a job. I'm not really sure what the deal is or if she even wants one. But, we live with my grandparents and she spends the majority of the day helping my grandmother with housework. I was working a lot. To the point that it was interfering with school and I felt myself getting really depressed because I really hated the job. I am now held back an entire semester because of all the stress. It feels like living at home is another job. When I get home, I don't relax. I don't have my own room. Everyone is always in there watching television, and messing up my things. I am not even exaggerating. I took pictures to show my therapist the messes that they have made in "my" area. I don't have a desk in my room. I've brought it to their attention several times. But, nothing gets done. They're just like: "go to the back room." There's no table in the house for me to sit in and just do my homework. There's always people over.
If I were to just go to school and focus on that, and not work, then I could finish the majority of my work in the library without a problem. But, the library closes and I'm working, then I really can't go to the library because the hours interfere with one another. Anyway, I hated my job and my boss was very abusive and got in trouble and I'd just rather find another job down the road. But, if I do start working, I'm going to need the dorm. Because, there's no way I can work and live at home. There's no place to do my work, there's no respect for my privacy. People walk into the bathroom while I'm in the bathroom, They have taken my clothes and put them in a huge pile of a mess. My mom and I argue all the time because she wants me to use my money towards getting fake nails, hair extensions, and a fake tan. It's just so much tension. So much tension. The other day, my phone was lost. Someone found it and I guess they called her because she's saved under Mom and that's the person they decided to call. She picked it up and spent the day reading through my text messages. There is no concept of privacy. It just doesn't exist. When I get home from work/school, it's like 9pm, and I feel more stress and more tension than I did at school/work. School is the most fun thing out of the three.
So, I thought the best solution would just be to get a dorm. I can find a job that I would like if I want to, after I get into the rhythm of the semester. But, I could actually do well in school, focus on what I have to do, and not argue. I just need the privacy more than anything.
But, here is the problem: I would need to take out a loan. So far, I haven't needed any loans. I have a full scholarship. So, I'm scared to take out the loan. I wouldn't have to pay it back until 6 months after graduation. That's the only thing holding me back. That, and that I'm scared. I guess it's normal. But, that's why I'm here. To get advice.
So, to dorm or not to dorm? I can't afford an apartment because I would need to pay 3 months in advance and they don't offer loans for that. So, that's not an option. Thank you.
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Definitely do the dorm. It puts you right in the life of the campus, closer to classes, and in contact with a diverse grouping of people. I'm still friends with people I met in my college dorm, and that was almost 20 years ago.
Take the loan, but be very careful. Check out the lender beforehand; ask about their risk management policies. What happens if you can't find a job after graduation? Can you defer the payment, or make partial payments? Do they resell the loans? (If they resell their loans, you might end up with a different company with entirely new debt collection terms.)
Also look into alternate sources of funding. Does your college offer work-study? Does your scholarship make you ineligible for Pell grants or Stafford loans? Are there any grants available for early-childhood studies?
Hope this helps, and good luck.
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I've decided I'm going to try to start writing. I think it could be a fun and interesting hobby I might really be able to get into. But of course I have concerns. I've made up the main story line in my head just not the characters names, titles, and my writing style. Lol a lot I know! It's going to be present day non-fiction with a little twist of horror in it. That's the kind of books I like to read. Not horror as in Stephen king but just a little kick. :) For names I'm just going to get that list that shows every baby name from A-Z. Titles hopefully I will figure out. So my main question is my writing style. I think I'm going to look at some of my favorite series and try that style out. That wouldn't be plagiarism, would it? I'm not going to copy names of characters and stuff just the style. That would be okay, right? Thanks! :) (link)
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What you're planning is not plagiarism. If you copied the plotlines and characters and stole whole sections of dialogue, that would be plagiarism. What you're planning is called "pastiche", and is perfectly acceptable. It's also a great way to learn writing. You might want to try your hand at writing fanfics; a lot of fanfic communities use a 'beta editor' system. Someone volunteers to read your rough work and give you feedback on what works and what doesn't. Many times, the volunteers are college literary students or even teachers and professional fiction editors. Give it a shot, and good luck!
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Hi, all of you. I have a small problem that could grow into a much bigger issue if allowed to go too far. I'm asking an honest question about a real dilemma I'm facing, so please, don't be harsh with your answers.
Here's the thing... I love music, particularly songs from the TV show Glee. I know FOX is a major company and doesn't need every penny they get to make it through the recession, but I respect them, and I want to support the show by buying music legally from the iTunes Store.
The problem is, my only real income is government assistance, and as much as I would love to buy all my favorite songs from Glee, I can't forget that my whole life right now is being funded by taxpayers who work hard for that money, and that the money isn't being sent to me to get spent on iTunes purchases.
I know of two ways to get any Glee song for free, but that's illegal, and I believe it's just plain wrong. I'm caught between misusing my income, which I REALLY don't want to do, and getting the music for free, which I also want very much to avoid.
Please don't suggest not getting the music at all. I know that's an option, and probably the best of the three. I'm just hoping there is some choice I'm not seeing that would allow me to do the right thing and still be able to listen to my beloved Glee songs. And don't just say "get a job." I'm trying; no luck so far, and therein lies the problem.
Any ideas? Please help! Thank you in advance. (link)
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Go to the public library and check out CDs. If they don't have the Glee CDs, get stuff by the original artists. It's perfectly legal to rip music from CDs for your own personal use, as long as you don't redistribute it. You're also adding to the customer base of a publically-funded institution, which makes it less likely to close or be defunded.
As far as supporting the show, you'll have more of an effect promoting the show through social media rather than buying the music. TV shows rely on fan bases to keep the funding coming from the parent companies. Buying music on iTunes isn't going to directly affect whether or not the next season gets made.
Good luck on the job hunt, and if it helps, public assistance isn't charity. It's the country investing in you. Sooner or later you'll find work and put everything back.
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What is a nickname for my boyfriend ? (link)
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George.
It's a reference to a Bugs Bunny cartoon called "Abominable Snow Bunny", in which a Yeti takes a fancy to Daffy Duck. "And I will love him, and cuddle him, and call him George."
Squishy is another good movie reference, from "Finding Nemo": "I shall call him Squishy, and he shall be mine, and he shall be my Squishy."
Or you could just be completely random and call him The Wombat of Love.
Just random thoughts from a random madman on the Internet. :-)
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I am not fat by all means but i have a "pooch" on my lower tummy. Its not toned at all and i really dont have time to exercise. I am a full time students and work part time. So far i have stopped drinking cokes but im not really sure what some healthy snacks i can eat are? Somneone give me advice of what to do to make my stomach more toned. Thank you! (link)
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Raw veggies and fruit, nuts, small pieces of cheese (Laughing Cow is perfect) for protein, are all good snacks. Stay away from sodas or artificially sweetened drinks. Plain water is your friend; green tea is also good for you.
A simple 10-minute ab workout is the Magnificent Seven:
1. "Farmer" Burns Stomach Flattener- Stand with arms at sides relaxed. Inhale through nose without letting stomach expand (just gently tense to avoid this). Now force air down & outward WITHOUT letting it out for 2-5 seconds. Do this for 2 minutes
2. Vacuums- Bend forward expelling ALL air out of lungs. Now without inhaling stand up pulling diaphagn/stomach under rib cage hold for 8 seconds. When you release let air draw in through nose. Do this for 10 reps
3. Tai Chi Waist Turner- stand with arms hanging loosely at sides rotate torso letting arms bend at elbows until they slap kidney area. This is done for 50 reps.
4. Back arch with forward bend & squeeze- With hands on hips inhale as you arch back as far as you can. Then exhale as you bend forward squeezing abs. 10 reps
5. Dynamic side bend w/isometric squeeze- Hold one arm overhead inhale as you bend as far to one side as you can, then move in & out just one half inch for 50 reps finishing with a 8 second squeeze of sides. Repeat on opposite side. {note: once doing movement you are breathing}
6. Hands overhead side bend- Lace fingers palms up overhead inhale bend to one side flex as hard as you can while holding 8 seconds. Do this 6 times then switch sides.
7. Trunk rotators- With hands on hips inhale hold breath as you circle around then exhale each time you reach start point. This is done for 10 then repeat in other direction.
Note: Breath in through nose exhale through mouth on everything. Do this a fully as you can. If you get light-headed this is not unusual, but should pass with time. At first these took me twenty + minutes, but not that I know then it only takes 11- minutes if I don't waste time.
This is very effective for toning all your core muscles. Your back will be stronger and will pull your spine straighter, which will help with your belly.
Hope this helps.
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I'm 18 and I'd like to learn something new, I really love all sorts of music and I'd love to be able to play the guitar. If I were to print out the tabs and music reading guide is it possible to teach myself? Any tips welcomed. (link)
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Also look into guitar tutorials on Youtube. You'll find instruction in all sorts of styles. I particularly recommend videos by Keni Lee Burgess. He's a NYC street musician and teacher, and his videos really break down blues guitar into its basic components. Good luck.
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Do you have any good ideas for a talent show performance for a person who cant sing, dance, or play a musical instrument? (link)
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Can you act? Classic comedy sketches are always an option, or comic monologues. Abbot & Costello routines are great for two people, as are Monty Python's Flying Circus' "Cheese Shop", "The Penguin Sketch" and "The Bee License". Hope this helps
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Im torn between faiths. the two faiths that i am torn by are Buddhism and Christianity, i have studied both religions adimently. so im not ignorant to eithers teachings. i am just torn on the which one to choose. As it stands im not religious, but have been trying to find a higher meaning in my life and have narrowed it down to these two. I feel the connection to both, so i am a bit divided. so any tips.
peace. (link)
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What exactly draws you to Buddhism? Is it the contemplative nature, the notions of reincarnation and detachment from worldly things? Is it the lack of dogma?
There's no reason you can't use Buddhism to inform your Christianity. There are contemplative traditions in Christianity, and concepts very similar to Buddhism. A good introduction to these traditions can be found in the works of Fr. Matthew Fox, especially in his book "Original Blessing". Read also St. Teresa of Avila, St. John of the Cross, and Julian of Norwich.
Ultimately, it's your choice: my truth is not your truth, and yours is not mine. Hope this helps.
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okay. i know alot of people say that being a homoselual is a sin. or in proper terms an abomination. Im gay and i would like to have a relationship with god and christ. but could i really have salvation, being what i am. I dont know because i hear reverends from both the liberal and conservative christian faiths give their " biblical facts" and i just dont know. any help will be great, thanks. :)
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Keep in mind that the Word of God often depends on context. There was a much different understanding of sex and sexuality when the Bible was written. Back then, you were supposed to get married and have children, no matter what your personal preferences were. Still, there were some who could not bring themselves to marry and have children, and they were commonly referred to as eunuchs. Check Matthew 19:12. "For there are some eunuchs who are born so from their mother's womb, and some eunuchs who are eunuchized by men, and some eunuchs who eunuchize themselves for the sake of the kingdom of the heavens. Let him who is able to receive it, receive it." The term eunuch is commonly understood to mean a castrated man, but in classical Greek it can also mean an effeminate man with no attraction to women. Here's a good article on the subject: http://www.well.com/user/aquarius/thesis.htm
Homosexual acts are condemned in Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13. These are part of a larger set of purity regulations (Lev. 18:6-30 in particular governs who with and when you can have sex) St. Paul in 1 Corinthians condemns the practice of molesting young boys, visiting prostitutes, and of sleeping with other men, partly as evidence that the Corinthians are not as spiritually advanced as they might think, but also as a way of maintaining fellowship with Jewish synagogues. Here's an article on Paul's teachings: http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CB4QFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.beliefnet.com%2FFaiths%2FChristianity%2F2004%2F04%2FHomosexuality-Rebellion-Against-God.aspx&ei=Vd4ATrf6GIT40gHt_LmbDg&usg=AFQjCNH94rqaEoJf3o16_CN_EgTKOSPkUw
Most importantly, there are only about six direct references to homosexual acts in Scripture, mostly in the context of maintaining purity. Matthew 25:31-46 gives explicit instructions for the path to salvation, and Jesus reminds us in John 14:6 that ultimately He decides who receives salvation. MCC's brand of theology unfortunately seems to leave these verses out. Ultimately, the choice is yours; there are churches who actively embrace the LGBTQ community, and who will gladly help you to seek Christ. Hope this helps.
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16 / F / 5'7 / 117 lbs
(If that has any thing to do with it.)
Usually when I stand up I blackout for about 8-10 seconds, but I can still walk the path I'm going if I know it well. (Ex: From my bedroom to my staircase) But this past week it's gotten worse. It's to a point where when I stand up I black out & I get dizzy, so I'm forced to either just sit/lay down on whatever is closest, which usually happens to be the floor. I don't know what's causing it.
I'm not sure if it has anything to do with this past weekend, I was very sick with nausea which made me lose my appetite for two days, & really bad chest & lower stomach pains. I was also falling every time I stood up. But like I said, now I just have to sit down, I'm not collapsing anymore.
Sorry if it's long, I'm just worried. (link)
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The blackouts may be from your blood pressure dropping. The change in altitude probably isn't helping much. Make sure you eat something, preferably something with protein and complex carbohydrates (trail mix is good) and tell your parents or whatever adult you're with. If this has been going on for a week, there's definitely something wrong and you need to see a doctor ASAP.
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how much does it cost to post a job on criagslist?
Do all cities charge and will there be any hidden fees on my phone bill? (link)
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http://www.craigslist.org/about/help/posting_fees
This page should answer your questions pretty thoroughly. Craigslist only charges in certain markets, and there should not be any additiional charges to your phone bill. Hope this helps.
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Ok so I'm finally in 11th grade so I get to go to the junior/senior prom :) I'm super excited, I already have a date (my boyfriend of over a year) and a dress (it's short so I won't trip on it because I am accident prone lol and it's dark blue so I don't have to worry so much about spilling stuff on it) and all of my friends and I are going to go out to eat before prom and then after it we're going to go hang out somewhere. I've never been to prom, so I don't really know how it goes. I know it's different for every school, but does anyone have any advice so I can make it the perfect prom night? Any thing I need to have that might be easy to overlook? Also, if anyone has any experiences they'd like to share, I'd be happy to hear it :) Thank you! (link)
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First thing: relax. Prom is a lot of fun, but little things will go wrong. Don't sweat them. Your hair, nails, shoes, etc. may not be perfect, but don't worry about them. Try not to get a table too close to the speakers, or else you'll spend the whole evening shouting over the music. If one of your friends is driving, make sure he/she stays completely straight and sober. Don't be afraid to ditch your friends or your date if they do something that's dangerous, stupid, or humiliating. Otherwise, just relax, have fun, and enjoy the evening. It'll be one of the high points of your life. (My senior prom was memorable: the girl I took spent most of the night dancing with my best friend. Things went downhill after that. I saw her again 15 years later; she was a security guard. As soon as she recognized me she went for her gun, then remembered she couldn't shoot me in public.) Anyway, hope you have better luck than I did!
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15/f, if that makes a difference.
Also, this info if it changes anything: I'm also a singer and so I know certain things, such as how to read music, the differences between a minor and major key, how to recognize what key a piece of music is in, etc.
Basically I'm not clueless about music, just about guitar. I'm fortunate enough to have a nice one, but.. I don't know where to start. I don't know what kind of pick I need, what kind of book, I can't afford lessons so please don't suggest that. I don't know any chords, how to play a chord, any of that stuff. I just don't know where to start. :/
Help? (link)
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The classic teach-yourself-guitar resource is Mel Bay. Most music stores will have the books, as will Amazon. YouTube also has a lot of instructional videos. I particularly recommend the ones by Keni Lee Burgess if you're interested in blues or slide guitar; he breaks it down to the absolute basics. Hope this helps.
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I am trying to eat healthier and my mom made tacos today and I was thinking that maybe tacos are actually healthy for you to eat because they have stuff like cheese, meat (hamburger or chicken), lettuce, and tomatoes inside a thing tortilla thing. So, does that mean tacos are actually really good for you and you can eat them when you're on a diet? (link)
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Another thing to look at is the tortilla. Crispy shells are basically giant corn chips, fried in oil. Not so good. Soft flour tortillas are made with a fat of some sort, sometimes lard, sometimes cottonseed or other oils. If you're looking for low-fat foods, that ain't it. Soft corn tortillas are usually made with corn and water, so they're better for you on the fat scale. Read labels. Generally speaking, lean meats, low-fat cheeses, and vegetables are better for you especially if you're trying to lose weight. You do need some fat in your diet, as many vitamins and other nutrients need fat in order to be absorbed. Tacos or other wraps can be part of a balanced diet, but probably shouldn't be the mainstay. Again, read labels, study up on nutrition, and pay attention to how your body reacts to things. Hope this helps.
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heyyy everyonee!
okay well im 16 and i weigh 153 and i am 5'6". i am not obese but i could loose about 25 pounds the most. i go to the gym and i am not sure if i am doing the machines right and i just dont know how to lose weight because i see no results.
****ALSO**** i am on ADHD medication which decreases my appatite alot so its not that i eat alot so idk what to do!
please help me on finding a way to lose weight fast :) thankss. (link)
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One thing to look at is diet. If your meds are suppressing your appetite, your body will go into a starvation mode and retain as much fat as possible. You need to eat, even if you don't feel hungry. Also, your meds increase blood flow to your brain. Your brain is a huge consumer of blood sugar. If your meds suppress your appretite, you may be going hypoglycemic without knowing it. (That's what my meds do to me; I don't get hungry, but my blood sugar drops to the point of getting migraines.) Look into the Zone diet: you eat 5-6 times a day, small meals and snacks comprised of healthy fats, lean protein, and complex carbohydrates. (I'm doing this; pretty effective.) A lot of athletes and bodybuilders use the Zone or some variation of it. Another diet to explore is Clarence Bass' Ripped diet, which is mostly vegetables and whole grains. Again, if you don't eat properly, no amount of exercise is going to get you to your ideal condition.
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me and my mom are looking for some rental homes, but it's really hard for us to find any right now. i've looked online but i really cant find anything. does anyone know of any websites that would help me? (link)
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If you're in the US, Realtor.com has nationwide listings for rental properties. Also, check Craigslist for people renting out houses or apartments. A lot of smaller landlords advertise there as it doesn't charge fees and gets lots of traffic. Good luck.
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17|f. ughhh i have this random red spot on the tip of my nose! i got it about 7-8 months ago & it wont go away. its not raised & was never a pimple. i wash my face twice a day & that hasnt helped. i exfoliate. ive tried those blackhead strips. i even got a facial & its still there!! i finally got rid of all my acne then this shows up it drives me crazy. does anyone know how i could get rid of it? thanks. (link)
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You may have some broken capillaries under the skin, in which case all the anti-acne treatments in the world won't do any good. You may want to talk to a dermatologist, or at least look into concealers.
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My boyfriend and I are looking to get married soon, but we have run into a problem. I really want a sunny wedding day (since I live in seattle, this would mean it would have to be in May-August). However, for our honeymoon, we both really want snow. We aren't skiers or anything, we just think the snow is very romantic. Where are nice places we could go for our honeymoon during the summer and still see snow? Thanks! (link)
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Head south. WAAAAY south, like Australia, New Zealand, South Africa, Argentina, etc. I can personally vouch for the beauties of New Zealand's South Island. Or Alaska; fly into Anchorage or Juneau and check out the glaciers. There are plenty of tour packages out there, or if you're really adventurous take the Alaska Marine Highway system from Seattle up through the Southeast Passage. You can drive your car onto the ferry, stop anywhere you like, and get back on the next boat. Not much snow, but great scenery and a fair bit of independence. I made that trip years ago, and it was one of the greatest experiences of my life. Congratulations, and I hope this helps.
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Exactly what part of downloading music is illegal?
Someone told me that what people get arrested for is uploading, not downloading it. (Because when you torrent a file, you upload as you download)
Is that true? Or is actually downloading a song illegal? If so, how do they even catch you? Do you have to be caught in the act or can they look at your iPod with 50000000000 songs on it and find out somehow that you didn't pay for them? (link)
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Strictly speaking, the act is copyright violation. You're obtaining a copy of the song without paying for it. You can be caught if your computer's Internet Protocol (IP) address is identified on a server's logs or torrent stream. Your internet service provider will get a notice that you've violated copyright law (DMCA in the US), and it's up to the provider as to what the next step is. Some will give you a warning, some will charge you a fee. Some will just cut off your service.
A lot of artists recognize that their fans will copy and pass around their music, and don't actively pursue filesharers. Some go a step farther and actually give public permission to freely share their stuff. There's something called a Creative Commons License that specifically covers this kind of permission: you can copy it and share it, but you can't change it or sell it. Check out archive.org's library of live music: there's all sorts of good live shows there, and they're all freeto download, listen to, and share.
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i want to know (link)
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It's a term from football. When the players line up, they take a 3-point stance: feet wide apart, bent over and one hand on the ground for balance. There are three points of contact with the ground, hence the name.
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