My names Zoe, Zozie is sort of an unofficial nicname, and the aunty...well, why not?
I´m 14 years old and have been living in manchester england, my entire life - obviously not counting the eeeeeeendlness trips to wales!
Saying i´m 14 may make some people think that i don´t know enough to be doing an advice column. My responce would be to that, if your close minded about who your taking advice from - then i suggest you don´t take any at all! I´ve always stood by the belief that a persons mind gives away their real age more, than a birth certificate and some hospital documents.
I´ve not exactly been through hell, fire and brimstone, but i´ve seen other people go through it, and witnessed how it affected them. And besides, i like giving advice,i like knowing that my words could possibly influence and positively help someone else. And that is why i´m doing this advice column.
God i sound like Martin Luther King.
Member Since: April 9, 2005
Answers: 35
Last Update: April 20, 2005
Visitors: 3785
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Im 14/Female and i havnt had my period yet. But i discharge...its heavy (been heavy) since maybe october. Not all the time though. Is it normal for it to be yellowish white? Because i will be in school sometimes and i will discharge and i will always look down to see if i had my period and i dont but its scary. When i do get my period and if im in school will it just come out when it wants to (like people could see it) that would be embarresing! Please Help Ladies! i rate high and give feedback!!!! Thank U (link)
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I know your probably sick of hearing this, but its completely normal! Some people don' start until they get to 16 - 17, so you've got plenty of time. When it comes, it won't suddently gush out of you so everyone can see it, it'll almost definately be a light flow and you'll notice pretty quickly. In the meantime, just make sure you carry towels or tampons around with you in case you do start. If you start getting really bad stomach pains, tearful or the discharge gets heavier, then you know i'll happen soon. Also, when you DO start, your period will be irregular for 2 years, in other words it won't suddenly start coming on the 17th of every month no fail. Another tip is (when the discharge gets heavier) just to wear pantiliners (like v.thin towels) in your knickers just in case. Just make sure you always have some towels or tampons with you just in case your caught off guard, but in the meantime, don' worry ! there won't suddenly be a flood down there!
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Okay, well.. so last summer I met a guy. Well, I actually met him last spring. We live so many miles away from eachother... and it's hard to bare. I met him through a family friend, and well before I even started talking to him I knew I liked him. It was amazing. When I saw him in summer we clicked. Well, atleast I thought we did. I made a new sn, but before that he had never IMed me on mine. Recently, I called him. And it was wierd. He didn't recognize me at first. Do you think it was because he didn't expect it? Because we were close it was wierd that he acted that way. And another thing is... I don't know the next time I'll see him. I mean Im sure I will one day, just no telling when. And I know it wont necesarily work blah blah blah... but I'm not really looking for that sort of advice. What is this disgusting feeling in me whenever I try liking someone else. I feel like he's the only one. And I guess it's because we share the same morals... I like the way his voice sounds (wierd), and he's plain sweet. Maybe quirky, different... but he's cute. And I personally like him. What is this feeling I have for him? And what should I do (in general not even involving him directly)? (link)
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Sounds like you've just got a crush! When you connect with someone that much, of course they leave a mark! Maybe if you want to keep in touch, you should ring him again (not that soon, cos you only rang recently) and ask him if he has an email address. but just cos someone doesn't live near you doesn' mean the two of you can't keep in touch. And he probably didn't recognise you because he hasn't heard from you in a long time, and he was caught off guard. I wouldn't take it personally at all. For the meantime, however, if you don't want to contact him straight away, just go out with your mates often, have a good time, possibily meet other guys and take your mind off him by living life to the full!
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Its so nice out today and its been winter forever, so this is the first warm day out and its really exciting haha ! what are some things i can do outside cuz i wanna use the day ! (link)
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Haahaa just go outside with ur mates sit n chill!!! I find that helps heehee!! Or theres always the classic, play tennis, foootball or something else involving energy! Just go outside and chill out! Enjoy summer, i am!!
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recently my ex has joined a group im in, i dont know how to react he ignores me and i ignore him.. help!! (link)
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What kind of group is it? Well whatever type of group its in, theres really no reason for the two of you to talk to each other if you don't want to. The odd "hi, how are you?" or "see you later" will suffice if neither of you feels the need to talk. If you do feel uncomfortable not talking 2 him, again, just extend the conversation slightly from "hello, how are you?" to "hi, how you doing? i heard you did such and such a thing....etc..." it doesn't have to be a philosophical debate or heart opening session, just the odd word, small talk. Its down to you what you do, but if you feel no need to talk to him, don't!
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recently a friend of mine had told me she had a secret, unfortuatly she cant tell me and i respect that but when other girls act weird around me it makes me feel down , how can i ask them to stop acting weird and not think about the secret 24/7 (link)
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Asking them straight out to shut up about this secret might not be the best bet. Just do something as a group that will take your mind off this "secret". I think its really great though that you've accepted that your friend can't tell you this secret, and i think you deserve some respect yourself for that. If the distracting idea doesn't work, you can just be polite about it with something like "Look, i know this secret doesn't concern me, but can we not just forget about it and think/talk about something else? lets just do something else, its getting kinda boring now." Its your choice what you say, but this secret isn't the be all and end all of life at school. But well done for respecting your friends secrecy - thats rare!
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this guy really likes me to put it simply.. hes really depressed. i dont wanna be the reason weather someone stays alive or dies. thats to much. he said im the only thing thats actually keeps him from doing stupid things im the only thing that means something good to him. He said theres only thing that keeps him moving and happy is me. i guess he isnt wantedat home. he wont answer my calls.. i left 2 messages saying call me.. he hasnt yet. he wont answer my calls.. at all he always does. Even if he is on the other line no matter what. He says the sound of my voice can bring a smile to his face.. so why isnt he picking up? Its really scary.. and i want to call for help. i have my yellow ribbon card if any of you know what that is. I could call the suicide line.. but do i have to give my identity away.. or say specifically who i am talking about? (link)
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If you call any kind of help line, it is ENTIRELY down to you to give information on your whereabouts, name or anything. Suicide lines are excellent for helping people, but getting the person whose feeling suicidal to call the line is another. If he seems to like you this much, maybe you could play on that emotion to get him to try and get help. Say it would make you really happy, or something along those lines. If he won't get help, then it doesn't have to be all pressurised on you. YOU can get help from these call lines about this guy, without having to give anything away. The operators are kind, friendly and give completely unbiased and often useful help. You don't have to go through this alone and its rather unfair that this guy has put you in that position, although he can't really be blamed for feeling depressed. Also, try and get it out of him what it is thats depressing him, because if you know what the cause is, then you know what the solution is. In the meantime, however, just taking him out to the cinema or having days out together can really cheer people up. Sometimes just letting the person forget their problems and have a good time can really help long term and short term, and you'll always be remembered for being a brilliant friend and helping so much. good luck and ask me for any more advice on this if you need it, as i'm going through pretty much the same thing with my friends.
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I have been looking for some shorts for summer. I like SHORT shorts. Does anyone know where I can find khaki or denim shorts that are short? (Lately, everyone has been selling the long, bermuda shorts) (link)
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New Look has a brilliant range of short denim shorts (i own a pair myself :)) and the more surprising places would be matalan, ross, walmart, or asda, depending where your from.
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Me and my friend were walking up to her house, we got round the corner near the lampost and we were like 20 metres away from her house. As we got round the corner there was a tall white van parked and a man standing there with his door open, I saw his arm moving so i looked down to see him wanking!! It was groose and he smerk at us.
I told my friend and she looked down to quickly we walked up to her house, when outside the house she shouted "MUM!!" as we climbed over her fence, he looked up at us quickly jumped in his van and drove off at the speed of light. He now knows where she lives and she cant sleep at night. Her mum didnt believe us and we told everyone in the neighbour hood to keep an eye out.
Im scared for life when anyone metions the words, wanking, penis, white van. I hate it so much i went white as a ghost when i saw him doing it.
I was shaking all day we tried to get her mum to report it to the police but she said "He might have just been goin for a piss" but i know he wasnt or piss would be comeing out of his dick.. not spunk. and he wouldnt exactly point it right at us..
How can my friend get over the fact that he knows where she lives?
sorry for it being so long lush me x (link)
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Ew. Truly gross. Two things really, chances are, this guy was either rather drunk at the time, or was attempting to do it in private, and is now highly embarrassed. If thats not the case, to stop it hapening again, you could try the full on embarrassment factor, let all your neighbours know, possibily exaggerate a little, making sure your most likely to inform the people who will be so disgusted that they will knock on his front door and scare him into hiding from embarrassment. however, if this doesnt work, and he contiues to wank in front of you, then you can report it to the police for threatening behavior.
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i need help writing a poem or any ideas about poems. does anyone know any sites with good love poems by teens? i tried searching but it was no use. =/ the topic is, this one guy and i e to be close and stuff and now it all just drifted away. if anyone can help, let me know, I'll IM you or something. Thanks =) I rate GOOD! (link)
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Do you need to find a poem or write one? Well finding one isn´t a problem, just literally type in on google Love Poems by Teens or Teen Love poems. But, if you are wwriting one, then what i find really helps, is to listen to a slushy CD, then on a clear night, go and look up to the stars, and think about a person you once/ do love, or failing that, go to a place with a really great view. It does sound stupid, but when you realise that love is greater than Richard Curtis films, greater than the stars or any other spectacular landscape you may be looking at, youll find it quite easy to get it down onto paper. Thin big, write small. Thats what someone once told me. Oh, and write what you know, another classic writers phrase. Good luck!
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I have very curly hair. Not like super tight curls but its verry curly, puffy, and frizzy. What can I do to help keep the frizz down? (link)
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I suppose the obvious answer would be to use diferrent, special shampoos. but as a frizz sufferer myself, i strongly reccommend the Nicky Clarke range. Follow all the steps on the bottles for about two weeks, and the frizz does become sleeker and more manageable. And no, i am not an advertiser for Nicky Clarke, i just happen to think his products are great.
PS: You might want to try the Frizz ease emergency spray as well, can often work wonders in emergencies. Good luck and let me know if you find any other weird and wonderful ways of calming frizz - i need some myself!
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i have this friend and she's like my best friend here at this school i just moved to, and like she knows everything about me and what not. but like recently i've noticed that she's been copying me, like everything and it's really annoying. i mean she's super nice but also shy so i don't know how to tell her this. like my handwriting is my handwriting like it's your thing and i like my handwriting it's actually nice but i've noticed that she started copying the way i write like my n's and h's and t's! like it really bugs me! she also copies the way i hold my hands while walking and she's starting to say things like i do!i always say holy crap like as an expression and she says it too! Like before i came here she seemed to have friends but like when i became friends with her she seemed to be attached to me and i'm like the "leader" of the two of us! isn't she the one who's supposed to show me around and tell me stuff...not me? i made new friends and like i have a lot more in common with them then the ones before that i ate lunch with, with my bff, but when i went to eat lunch with my new friends she wanted to follow, like i didn't want to say no but i didn't want her to come, i know that may seem mean but like the two groups don't mix, but she came and she started comming everday so then everyday up to this day we eat lunch with my new friends but everyday she seems depressed when we eat lunch with them. she's very insecure it seems and it seems like no one really treated her as a real like member of her group before i came, like she even told me that i was the one she was the closest to in all of that table, but i'm like didn't she hang out with them for like five years...shouldn't she be good friends with at least one of them? in the beginning of the year i remember someone mentioning that she was copying them before i came. so how do i tell her that i need some space. or do i even tell her? i mentioned to my new friends that i wanted to hang out with them but being with my bff hasn't let me...sorry this was extremely long. (i have never been the "leader" of a group, we were always all equal and just had fun, and we mostly weren't shy between ourselves! AND i've noticed that i've started to become like her more and it's not the good things, the way i walk like she walks really fast because she's insecure/shy and seems like shes in a hurry all the time and i've started to do that too!) how would i deal with this situation? (link)
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I think youve answered your own question in this. You say that you never had a leader of a group and that you were all equal - thats great! Shes oviously used to the stupid school hierarchy thing,being the cloest one to her, i thin you an subtly drop hints every now and then that you thin she is just as good as everyone else (even if you dont, itll solve her jealously/copying prolem) and if she ever calls you anything like a leader, just joke and say shes as much as a leader as you are - or something along those lines! I dont really thin you needed help with this, youve pretty much got school groups sussed! Wow!
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well, i like 2 guys. one is tall, and really cute and funny. He calls me hobbit because i am a foot shorter than him 5' to 6'. there's one problem tho, he has a gf. They never do anythin together and they talk like they are still friends but whenever we are talking he stops when she comes over. His gf is my friend too and she's really sweet but he doesnt pay as much attention to her as he does to me. But then there is this other guy is most of the time sweet and cute. He tries to make me laugh all the time. He is about the same height as me and lots of freckles. I always stares back at me during one of our classes where i sit behind him. Yesterday, he threw me up against the wall because we were playfighting. It was a joke tho. I don't know, they both flirt but i dont know what to do
(link)
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Someones popular! Sounds like both of these two may like you, whether its more than friends or not only you can determine. My advice would be, if the first guy asks you out (the one that calls you a hobbit) run it by his x gf/ur friend. Its possibly not the most appealing ideas, but tell it to her straight, that you and whateverhisnameis are goig out, and that you hope she is ok with this because it means a lot to you. But firm with her, and try not to leave an opening in the conversation where she could butt in with something along the lines of"Youre betraying me" "I thought you were my friend" etc etc. Get her used to the idea that you and this guy will be going out, mae it clear that you hope she is ok with this, but if shes not shes going to have to deal with it, because its your life. If, however, this guys not the one, and the second one asks you out (unless theres no camicaze ex gf hanging around) then go for it because theres nothing holding you back!
Then again, there is the possiilllity that these two are just friends, but thats down to you to decide, ive just given you ideas of what to do in each possible situation! Good luck!
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okay theres this guy named ryan. i love ryan. ryan says he loves me.. but me nd him get inalot of fights.. not big ones though they last like 1 hour. soo today is my birthday.. me and him were gonna hang out and i walked really far to hang out with him and then he callz my cell and says he is hangin out with (people i hate) kansa and victorea... (there on drugs) i got mad.. very mad.. nd started to walk home.. then when i get home he callz my cell again and says wanna hang out.. and it was like 8 so i was like no and blah blah then i notice he was ingoreing me.. i got mad.. and i told my friends the story. he hurts me.ditchs me.. they think i should forget about him but idk what i should do i really love him.. i cry myself to sleep every night thinking about him.. every mintue of my class i cant stop thinking about him! should i leave him or no?
p.s me and him are not going out .. we love eachother though.
please help i rate high! (link)
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I think its a brilliant idea, the two of you not going out, because choices of different friends can often lead to arguements. The two of you need to sit down (and i know this is undoutedly what everyone says) and have a civilised conversation about it! No arguements or rows! You dont have to tell him you hate his friends, you could put it a different way, for example, be slightly flirtly and suggest the two of you spend more time alone, he´ll probably warm to the idea! Trust me.
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Why do guys get angry when you have only been dating two months and they tell you they love, but if you don't feel comfortable saying it back they all the sudden don't love you? Especially the only reason you don't want to say it is because that is when people start getting hurt! (link)
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There are two answers to this, first, they don´t love you, and as cruel as it may sound, they probably just wanted it said back 2 them to make them feel better. Boys can be incredibly inseure, us girls mature far quicker! ;) Ha ha but the other reason may be he does have feelings for you, maybe not unconditional love, but feelings nonetheless, and you not saying it back may have made him feel unwanted and vunerable.
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Today my friend Liam invited me to his 18th birthday party. I was rather shocked because I don't really know Liam, but I guess he likes my quirkiness. So I was really excited until I realized that I don't really know any of Liam's friends besides the people he talks to in art class, and only one of them is really a friend. Her name is Rachel. Sometimes I talk to them about things in the art room where I know them from. They're both very open about themselves and have said that they're into drugs among other things. So I'm worried about going to this party tomorrow because I don't want to get caught up in drugs, but I also want to be friends with Liam and Rachel because they're nice people who talk on my level and care about the things I care about.
so should I go or should I stay home and be perfectly safe? and if I go and there are drugs, how can I stay away from them and not come home smelling suspicious? (link)
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Do you get on well with either of your parents? If so, i think you should maybe jokingly bring it into conversation that there may be people at this party who you DO NOT KNOW and may be doing drugs. Therefore, if you do come back smelling of something other than coca cola and crisps, then they won´t be suspicious, because you´ve also earned their respect by telling them in the first place. If, however, you don´t get on with your parents, the only other option is to stand your ground. If you get offered drugs, or anything you don´t want, you are free to say no. Besides, people do exaggerate about doing things they haven´t, so there is a small possibilty that Liam and Rachel havent´done all they say they have.
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