I'm a woman in Texas. I'm married and have a school-aged child. I have a medical background. I'm quite liberal, socially. I love helping people with medical, parenting, and social questions. Don't ask me about tech stuff or finances, because I need advice on those things myself!
Gender: Female
Location: Texas
Age: 34
Member Since: December 17, 2006
Answers: 795
Last Update: September 2, 2007
Visitors: 50071
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Xenolan
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well the maid my mother hired for a year now is sexy!!! Its just me and her alone in the weekends cause my mothers working.. im know this sounds crazy but its true, when my mothers home she dresses appropriate then when my mothers not home she dresses with hardly nothing on in the weekends ,and i know its to tease me cause ive caught her a few times staring down at my you know what!! I want to know things i could do to get her aroused with me, i know shes playing this game with me so i want to play it back secretly!!! How do i aroused a woman without her noticing im doing it in purpose?im 23 n shes 34. (link)
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See, Xeno, I think this actually IS a sitcom. This 23-year-old man is living in his mother's house and is home with the maid every weekend. He can't even say 'crotch'? He also doesn't know what to do, at 23 mind you, about a hot maid who wants him? Yeah. Not buying it.
Sabine
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ok so my arugument for my paper is why the drinking age should be lowered to 18. Does anyone know any good websites? (link)
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I found a few by Googling 'drinking age 21'. Here's an excerpt from the first page to come up:
* Dr. Ruth Clifford Engs of Indiana University, an internationally-known health educator and alcohol researcher, believes that the minimum drinking age of 21 in the US is too high.
* Dr. David J. Hanson of the State University of New York at Potsdam evaluates research regarding the effectiveness of age 21 minimum age legislation.
There are links from this and even a table of different drinking ages in different nations. One thing you could argue is something like 'in (Random Country), the drinking age is 16. But children are raised around people using but not abusing alcohol. What we need to do is lower the drinking age and instead, focus on re-educating the public and changing the image of irresponsible drinking from cool to stupid. When we expose teens at a younger age to the privilege of alcohol while they are still closer to their parents' care, rather than waiting until they are away from home, we can provide the opportunity for teens to consume alcohol in more responsible ways and to see its effects more clearly while they still have a supportive home life (rather than in fraternities, etc).' There's also a problem with the fact that it's the last of the privileges we Americans get. We can drive, vote, purchase property, get married, have kids, and die for our country all before we can crack a beer. Why single out this one thing above the others as something we cannot trust our young adults with?
I know you asked for websites and there were a lot of things that came up rather quickly for me.
Just in case you didn't know, the drinking age was raised to 21 via financial force through the federal government. They said that kids drinking and driving were raising the death toll on the highways and they would reduce federal highway funds for any state that did not comply with the federal recommendation of a 21 drinking age. Some states held out for a long time, but money talks.
Hope you find what you need.
Sabine
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well that is my question please answer- if a girl has aids and she gives a guy a blow job does he get aids?
ps this is just for the info (link)
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There's a very, very, very slim risk of a woman transmitting HIV during a blow job. First, she has to have blood in her mouth and, second, he has to be actively bleeding from somewhere on his penis. Then the blood has to mix and her blood has to get up into his blood stream. It's highly unlikely.
Sabine
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do you need a prescription to get birthcontrol
because i can't tell my mom and I can't go to a doctor.
don't tell me to tell her i have cramps so i need birth control because shes smart and it doesnt work for me.
im 14 so i have no car and it would be easy for me to walk to walgreens and get it but im not sure if you need prescription or anything.
so if theres a way for me to get birthcontrol tell me
thank you :] (link)
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You don't have to go to a doctor or drive very far to use birth control provided you use condoms. You just have to use them exactly as the directions say and use them every time. For birth control pills you do need a prescription and if you can't go to a doctor, you can find out what Planned Parenthood can do for you, assuming you can get there.
Condoms are probably your best bet.
Sabine
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This was my last question,
I met this guy not too long ago. I'm 19 and he's 28. We started talking and we get along great. I think he has been very honest to me. He has a girlfriend he's been with for 4 years. She was away for work... but he told me he likes me. I started to like him a lot too. He started to ask me questions, like if I think he's cheating on his girlfriend by talking to me. I told him no, because we're not doing anything physical and I told him if he was starting to feel guilty that we could stop.... And yesterday morning he told me that he probably wasn't going to be able to see me anymore because his girlfriend was comming back. We started talking and he seemed pretty sad and I was sad... and I guess one thing led to another and we eneded up having sex...
I'm not the type of person that falls for any guy and i've always had high standards. It's really hard for me, But this time I found someone that was able to reach those standards... but he's taken. He kissed me and said goodbye. I don't think i'm ever going to see him again. I'm afraid of calling him, because his girlfriend is back... And I want to respect that and not get in the way.
Sorry this is so long. But I don't know what else to do, Any thoughts or advice?
... So he called me today and asked how i was feeling since we slept together, and he said he can't stop thinking about me. I asked him if it was a good thing, and he told me he really didn't know and that he feels a mixture of being worried and falling for me... so I just told him that I like him a lot and he told me he likes me too, but he called to make sure we don't lose contact... and that was it.
I don't know. Do you think his feelings are sincere or did he just want to have sex? I really think he's an honest guy and he really doesn't seem like the "player" type.
I care for him a lot and his happiess is important to me, that's why I'm trying not to get in the way of him and his girlfriend... But I don't know... (link)
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Well, your standards are not as high as you say if you would fall for a guy who would cheat on his girlfriend of four years with a girl who should be in a different stage of life than he is in. He should be seriously committed to his girlfriend. Instead, he's sleeping with you behind her back. And I think you're wrong. Sex with another is not the only way of cheating - emotional intimacy is just as sacred to a relationship as sex and he gave that to you instead of his girlfriend. He cheated on you with her even before the sex. Now maybe you're just so perfect for him that he would not have done it with anyone else. However, I think he was letting his junk call the shots when he hooked up with you. If it's really a matter of two soulmates finding each other, even though one was already attached, he will break it off with his girlfriend soon so he can be with you. If not, then just know that he is not in love with you or for some reason can't break things off with the girlfriend. You will probably not end up together and you will likely be better off because of it. He has to live with his infidelity. He'd better hope his girlfriend never finds out.
I think he was sincere about really liking you. But an honest guy doesn't sleep with someone when he's already in a relationship with someone else. He may not be the devil, but he's no angel either. Be realistic and proceed with caution.
Sabine
You said: Good answer. Very honest, which I liked. But try looking at it from the point of view of someone who doesn't believe monogamy... That is why him having a girlfriend doesn't bother me... My main concern is if he is just after sex, I want to know if his feelings are sincere in that aspect...
I'm not judging you on not believing in monogamy. There are some people who simply don't believe it's in human nature. However, does your guy believe in monogamy? Moreover, does his girlfriend *think* he believes in monogamy? That's more important. Surely you don't believe in letting someone mistakenly think you're being monogamous, right? So this guy can't have it both ways. He either believes in it and honors his committment to his girlfriend or he tells his girlfriend that he does not believe in monogamy and they agree to either have an open relationship or no relationship at all. No betrayal, no guilt. You're in a difficult situation. You have my best wishes. Again, Sabine.
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17/f.
well ive only had sex like 3 times and the last time the guy wanted me to go on top but i had no clue what i was doing.
can someone please tell me what to do when im on top.
thanks in advance. (link)
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In some places, a person over 18 can be prosecuted for talking to a known minor in sexually explicit manner. I hope everyone answering thinks of that before telling this person anything.
Sabine
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well you know how you americans brag about how you live in a democracy and what not, how come the native american indians aren't allowed to vote?? (link)
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I don't know where you got that information, but Native Americans have been granted the right to vote since 1924. They are citizens of the United States and also of their soverign nations.
That's not to say that we don't treat Native Americans in a completely shameful way. Our federal government owes some tribes billions of dollars from royalties on their land, water, and mineral rights which the government 'held' for them, saying that Native Americans weren't capable of managing the money themselves, and which they then refused to disburse to the tribes. Our government does some seriously wrong stuff, not only to Native Americans, but to many groups of people who are not white, rich males.
I don't know where you are from, but whatever country you could name, chances are that those in power oppress those without power. USA is no exception.
Sabine
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ok so i have a boyfriend now and me and him have been going out for about 6 days. he confuses me so much because he never tells me what hes feeling.the past couple of days hes been really nice and been giving me kisses and holding me n stuff but today he was acting wierd...i was walking with him after school and he didnt even wanna give me a hug or kiss good bye...he just left.also i think he never kissed me because he was gonna fight this gang but he never did...and he got his phone taken away yesterday but i dont now if thats really the truth.he never calls anymore i miss the old him.
be honest is it me or him with the problem?...i dont now im confused.and do you think my relashoinship with him is gonna last?
advice...please...thanks... (link)
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Question for you: Do you care about yourself and want to do something with your life? Are you a bright, young woman with wishes, dreams, plans, and goals for herself?
Then run the other way! You've been going out with someone for 6 days and things are changing? You ask whether you love him? (If you ask then then answer is almost always no - it's like having pain, you know when you feel it.) He dissed you because he was going to fight a gang??? And you don't know whether to trust that he really had his phone taken away or whether he just didn't call you? I don't know about you, but this is not the kind of person I would encourage a relationship with. You can't build a relationship with a gang-banger who values fights above his future and your relationship.
You wanted advice, so here it is: let him drift away and look for someone who's not likely to be in jail in the near future.
Best of luck to you.
Sabine
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Okay, so I haven't had my period yet and I think I'll have it towards the month's end. And my birthday happens towards the month's end. So here's the prob: my fam and friends will go on an out of town trip and we'll go swimming. Now, how the heck can I swim when I have my period? I don't use tampons but I heard that if you use tampons while swimming then there's nothing to worrry about. Is that true?! And I've also heard this thing that the "flow" stops once you're underwater so you don't have to worry. Is this also true or is this just a myth?!
Please do help me! This is urgento! (link)
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You mean this is your first period ever? Because they're hard to predict and they're usually lighter the first time and they come and go without warning. Regardless of whether or not that's what you meant, if you're young and your body is smaller, there are junior size tampons which might be more comfortable than the regular ones.
Your period doesn't stop when you're in the water. Have you ever taken a shower while you have your period? It keeps on going. For the sake of everyone else who uses the pool and gets the water in his or her eyes, nose, and mouth, please use a tampon. I have had a tampon leak before while I was in the pool and I was surrounded by a small, dark cloud of blood. I was very lucky that no one else seemed to notice. It's possible with some people that if you're swimming in cold water your blood vessels will clamp down and staunch the bleeding somewhat, but since this is shedding of the uterine lining, the blood vessels don't have that much to do with it.
Whatever happens, best of luck to you and Happy Birthday!
Sabine
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i have a friend thats really skinny shes 5'3" and 70 lbs is she anorexic? im worried about her (link)
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All we can tell by knowing her height and weight is that she is very underweight. I disagree with the numbers from the other advicinator, 154 is too heavy. She should be between 105 and 140, according to BMI calculators. I'm also 5'3" and right at 140 and I would consider myself a little on the heavy side. The values are even lower if the friend is still a child. Those values only work for an adult.
Anyway, I think she's likely still quite underweight. You can't tell that she's anorexic by her height and weight, though, because anorexia is a disordered behavior pattern. It's possible that she's so skinny because she has a health problem, like a heart problem or cancer or because she's a tall 11-year-old, or because her parents are neglectful and don't feed her. We just don't have enough information.
Have you ever asked her why she's so skinny?
Sabine
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I was wondering if it was possible that a woman not have any pleasure during sex...and like...no G-spot. Because i've masturbated before, and not had any pleasure, and ive been fingered without much pleasure...and i just started having sex and i dont feel anything good. Im kind of freaked out. I didnt think it was possible, but I could be wrong. Someone help! (link)
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Don't freak out, darling. Just try stimulating your clitoris. Many women get no sexual satisfation out of vaginal intercourse. That's what vibrators are for. You may not be old enough to buy one through the mail or at a toy shop, but there are ways of getting them. For example, the muscle massagers they sell at WalMart or Target are just as good.
Use masturbation to explore your body and find out what feels good to you. Pay attention to what scenarios or fantasies in your mind turn you on. That way you know what to ask for.
Sabine
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i was wondering in the dominican republic the drinking age is 18 i think right? So i was wondering what is the gambeling age? (link)
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They're both 18, which is easily found through a targeted Google search 'dominican republic gambling age'.
http://www.hispaniola.com/dominican_republic/info/
faq.php
Sabine
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Does anyone know of any department stores that sell crystal (fake crystal/diamonds would be suffice) headband things? (link)
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Have you tried Claire's, The Icing types of places? I have seen some at my local Kohl's. I would also look at Lord and Taylor's and Dillard's.
Sabine
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omg help! my baby girl is PREGNANT and i have soo many questions!
1. what do i do after she gives birth? how do i separate the guinea pigs so that she wont bite me when i pick them up?
2. will the girl always eat the guinea pigs, no matter what?
3. how do i care for her right now, while she's pregnant?
4. how long do i have to wait for the babies to grow up before i can let them be together?
PLEASE Any advice!! (link)
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I got a lot of information by Googling 'pregnant guinea pig'. There's a lot of important information available.
Congratulations to your girl on her impending motherhood.
Sabine
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I have been on the pill for 2 almost 3 years and it was working good then a couple of months ago my period started coming early and that was fine cause it would come on the week it was supposed to. Then 3 weeks ago i started my next pack of pills and iwas only takeing them for a week and a day and i got my period. i didnt go all the way through it just stopped then it was gone for a day or 2 and then it came back again and i lasted a day and then went away then it went a way for a the rest of the week and now i am on my 3rd week of pills and i have my period AGAIN and im not supposed to. Can someone please tell me what is going on im scared and jsut want to know what to do. PLEASE. . .
I know i have to go to the doctor but i dont have insureance to do so at the moment or i would go to the doctor. (link)
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Call the doctor and explain the situation. It's likely that the hormones in the pill are not enough right now and you might need to change. Hopefully, you've had a check-up within the last year. If so, the doc may be able to change it over the phone and possibly give free sample packets for another month. Otherwise, also, you could go to Planned Parenthood or possibly a student health service if you're in college. Those have reduced-fee services, usually.
But first see what you can get accomplished over the phone.
Sabine
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I want my bf to touch my boobs but I don't want it to go any farther than that. What should i do? (link)
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If you can't openly say "I would like for you to put your hands up my shirt, but you are not allowed below my belt," then just try moving his hands to your breasts. If his hands move elsewhere, firmly grab them and place them on your waist, breasts, or wherever you feel comfortable. Most guys want to know what you're comfortable with and will respect your boundaries. If he doesn't, then he's not a gentleman.
Best wishes.
Sabine
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Whats the south beach diet? (link)
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Google it!
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0hKay ;; So.
My Name Is Rachel && I Am Ultraaa Cool !
I'm Like ,,, WAY Popular.
Like ,,, Seriously . OhKay ;;
But See ;; I've Got This Friend ,,,
That Is Also Pretty Popular ...
But She's Not As Popular As Me !!!
But Anyway;; She Told My Crush That I Liked Him;;
Although I Told Her Not To !!!
She Said That She Thought He Liked Me Too ...
She Said That He Asked Her If I Liked Him ...
AND SHE SAID YES !!!
I Hate Her !!! ;;;
I Told Her That I Hated Her ,,,
Infront Of Everyone !!!
[[[Yes I Am Cool Like That]]]
And She Teared Up And Didn't Say Anything ,,,
Then Everyone Like ;;;
GLARED At MEEEE !!!
When I Was The One That Was Betrayed !!!
I Heard That He Was Going To Ask Me Out (YAY)
When He Found Out That I Liked Him!!!
=]]]]]]
But , What Should I Do To Her?
Because ;;; What She Did Is Not Right ;;;
I Want To Get Her Back!
UGH!
THANKS !!! :]
;;;;
LOVE, LEENA !!! (link)
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Whether your name is Rachel or Leena, tearing someone down in front of others is NOT COOL. You are not nearly as cool as you think. In fact, you're acting like a spoiled brat. So your crush found out that you like him back by directly asking your friend and now he's going to ask you out. So not only do you get to be asked out by your crush without any work, but you want to play the victim, too, and get revenge on this girl whom you've already embarassed in front of your popular friends? That's cruel. The only way to redeem yourself is to speak with her in private about what you feel she did wrong and to apologize for embarassing her in front of everyone. Give her a chance to apologize to you as well. That's my advice.
As you mature, you'll begin to see that people who are popular by playing dominance games aren't popular very long. It's the people who can get along with everyone who are truly popular.
Sabine
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I'm a 17 year old guy. I have been dating this girl for a long fun while now, and we have an awesome relationship. We talk and joke around like best friends and get jiggy with it as lovers do. The only thing is that a road block just recently popped up. Throughout the relationship she had been telling me that she was a virgin and never saw a penis before and all that stuff. Then we were wasted one night and she decided to give me this big confession that infact she wasn't a virgin. She had touched, licked, and sure enough had sex with an ex that before this point she always spoke lowly of him. A lot of the time she would even bring him up in common conversation. So, now she tells me this and first I feel betrayed because I have been lied to for so long. Second, I feel confused because you think she wouldn't talk so bad about this guy if he took her virginity. Third and lastly, I feel scared because thinking that she was a virgin, we fooled around a little without a condom. That brings up worries of STD's and so forth. What should I think or say or do? Am I mad at her? When she says she regets it do I believe her? Does she still of feelings for this guy (who, if I might say myself is 100% full of nasty)? Should I trust that she isn't keeping anymore lies from me? (link)
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Well, broken trust is a big thing, especially if you *were* a virgin. She probably does deeply regret being with nasty-boy. You don't say how long ago she was with him or how long you and she have been together. If you're worried about STDs, you should both go to a clinic. It's up to you whether you can forgive her or not, but I totally understand her impulse to lie to you. She probably thought you would think she was a slut if you knew she'd been with nasty-boy. She made a mistake. Once the STD thing is cleared up, give her a chance to tell you if she has any other secrets she's hiding from you. Then tell her that you can forgive this one thing, assuming you can, but that she will have to earn back your trust. Don't have sex with her until you have established that you are both clean. Any more major lies and it's over. I don't think you have anything to worry about with nasty-boy. If she wanted to be with him, she would still be with him. She's looking for better and she found you. Give her a chance.
Parenthetically, I have to say don't get wasted anymore until you're 21!
Sabine
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i get really big clots with my period. im already on ibuprofen and take 2 4 times a day to try and help. i use tampons and they just slip right past it but i cant use a higher tampon size because ive tried and it hurts and the clots still slip by. does anyone have anything to help me without having to go out or anything? and does drinking water help?? thanks in advance!! and im 14 and a virgin and i dont realy let my period affect my social life although it slows me down (link)
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You just need to see a doctor about this, hon, because there are things she can prescribe, like possibly birth control pills, and conditions that she can rule out. There's no standard way to treat this without seeing a doctor. Staying hydrated may help or may not. Good luck.
Sabine
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