Well, I'm a second year college student. I have had my share of embarrassing moments, troubling times and I'm not the girl who got all the guys--so at least you'll know my advice is sincere and relatable, not perfect in an imaginary world. Any questions whatsoever are welcome, I'll try my best to answer accordingly.
Gender: Female
Location: Miami
Occupation: Student
Member Since: August 4, 2006
Answers: 334
Last Update: February 14, 2008
Visitors: 19292
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Brandi_S
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I was dating a guy who joined the army, and he was scheduled to leave for basic training at the end of May or beginning of June. At the beginning of May, he started to ignore me. Wouldn't answer phone calls or anything. I had no idea what was going on, because I had seen him the night before he started to ignore me and everything was fine. This continued for about two weeks, until he finally answered one of my messages by breaking up with me. He was worried that it wouldn't work because he would be leaving for a long time after this year. He ignored me for another two weeks after that, and finally a few days before he left he let me know when he was leaving. I asked him if he would tell me when he was back, and he promised that he would.
I know from mutual friends that he is back, but he hasn't tried to contact me in any way. I don't know why, and I don't know if I should try to talk to him. I miss him so much it's almost unbearable, as a boyfriend, but even just as a friend and someone to talk to.
What should I do? I want him back in my life...I don't think that I will hear from him if I don't try to contact him first, and I really want to, but then I feel like I should respect his space because it's clear he doesn't want to talk to me, right? I am SO lost.
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That is a bit of a toughie.
I would say contact him. If you don't...it will always bother you. If he doesn't want anything to do with you after that, then there's not much you can do, right? You tried, and he didn't want anything...then just forget about it. And I know it's hard. You become such great friends with the guy you are dating and you trust him wholeheartedly and know you can tell him anything...and when that is taken away from you...you are not sure where to turn. Been there and I know how sucky it is. But, think of it this way...if after you have tried to contact him once...and he doesn't want anything to do with you, you can take that as closure. He's not going to be there for you anymore, and you can find another great guy who will like you more than you can even imagine.
Good luck,
Teacup
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f/15
I want to date this guy who I have been quite close friends with for years. We have always liked eachother as more than friends (although it was sort of on and off since we went periods without hanging out) and that is what kept our friendship alive. We have always acted like we were dating (to some extent) and I'm quite sure it would be long lasting between us. I think he is going to ask me out within the next two weeks since we recently told eachother for the first time how we really feel.
Now the thing is that I have had two boyfriends in the past but never told my parents so they think I have never dated a guy. They know I hang out with this guy a lot and he calls my house sometimes asking if I wanna come over. My parents have never met him since I always go to his house and he has never been at mine (because I don't think my parents would allow it).
I am a really good liar and I know I could hide it if I was dating him, but should I? What would be the benefits of telling my parents rather than keeping it a secret?
If I tell my parents (if he asks me out) that we are dating and they don't approve they would probably think differently about letting me go to his house even as friends. If I keep it a secret and get caught they may find out other secrets I have since I basically live a double life (I am a straight A student but I drink and lie to my parents a lot, but they think I'm 'good' and don't do drugs).
Sorry about that being so long but there are many factors and I am running out of time to make a decision (link)
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I think you should tell your parents. I know I didn't want to tell my mom about my first boyfriend, but it makes it easier. And I know this sounds cliche to the max...but they always have ways of finding these things out. If you really believe in the relationship, you should let them know. You won't have to sneak everything around and worry about what you do and say to your parents.
Good Luck,
Teacup
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13/F
I'm going into 8th grade this year, which means I'm going to be applying to a few different high schools. The application process includes an interview, and I've never done an interview for anything before. I'm not super nervous because I'm usually fine with talking to people, but does any one have any tips? (link)
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I had to do an interview for a college. I would suggest you make sure you are friendly, nice, and that they see something in you. Don't be afraid to ask questions, make sure you know about the school,and if they attempt to intimidate you by saying that the school is very difficult, make sure you exude confidence and show that you can definitely handle whatever is thrown at you. Be yourself, and dress appropriately.
Good Luck,
Teacup
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What exactly is OCD, and how do you know if you have it? (link)
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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is basically when people are extremely obsessed with certain things, it's a psychiatric disorder/anxiety disorder. For example, they may do certain rituals every day..like touching doors or counting steps and things of that nature because they think if you don't do it..bad things will occur. And if it's not done correctly, they may repeat the process until the feel satisfied with it.
MTV showed a very good true life about people with
OCD, you should check it out if they ever play it again.
Being a perfectionist and obsessed with the way things go....doesn't necessarily mean you have OCD.
If you want to find out if you have it...I would suggest you speak to a psychiatrist.
Here's a link that explains more about OCD
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive_compulsive_disorder
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iiN a couple of weeks, im goin in to high school for my first year. im excited but really nervous. any tips on the change? (link)
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High school and middle school are not really that different. The only real difference that I can really think of, is having to take things a little more serious for college. You should start looking into colleges you know you will love, join clubs and activities that will make you an active person in school, and worry about doing well.
But, it's also fun. Going to football games, meeting new people, going to the homecoming dances, and etc.
Good luck!
--Teacup
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So it's my first day of work.
I'm wearing a pink tee and jeans from the store and belts and shoes I bought from elsewhere.
I want to do pink makeup.
The last time I saw my manager was at the interview and I wore a black skirt, a beige camisole and a black shirt to layer it and beige shoes and purse, neutral makeup. So I think I should do a pink girly look for tomorrow.
Also, I have longish-side bangs. Should I tie my hair up? Or braid it or leave it down or what? I left it down for the interview. (link)
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About your hair...I would say tie it up. Just because, you don't know how much running around you are going to do, and if it's going to be real hot or not because of this, so I would say tie it up for comfort.
I think your outfit sounds good =], and sorry I have no idea what you mean by the additional info.
Well, with that being said...good luck!
Teacup
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okay, well, im only 13, but i know what i want to do when im older. i want to work for pop star magazine. no, not just because i'd get to meet celebs, though that wouldnt hurt, but i want to be a journalist and interiew people. do i have to go to college for that, and if so, what classes do i have to take? (link)
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Hey!
I am actually planning to work for a magazine, and maybe even having a job like Atoosa from Seventeen. Well, I am starting college soon..in like ten days...and I am double majoring in Journalism and English.
After that, I am planning to move to New York to get my master's on both areas. Plus, all major magazines are there...so hopefully to get a job as well.
Good Luck,
Teacup
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i'm a junior in high school and i would like to go to an online college a few years after i graduate. i wanna do this bc i wanna figure out who i am & exactly what i want to do. i also think it's cool to learn independently at your own pace without pop quizes, lectures etc and i wanna sleep in and do whatever. i just wanna know if it's easy or hard or anything like that ... i just wanna get a feel for it from people who have done it themselves or know someone who has done it. thanks! (link)
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Well, I am starting college in about ten days. And I am going to take an online course, and when we had orientation they let us know that, taking online courses is difficult. You have to make sure you are dedicated enough to go through with it. It's easy to just say...ohh I'll do it later...but then the laziness adds up, and you'll fall behind. I had a friend who took an online course and he also said it was difficult.
If you want to figure out who you are and exactly what you are going to do...there's no better place than a normal college. You don't have to declare a major immediately and you are going to get a chance to meet new people. If you are doing online college...you can't meet new people by means of clubs and classes. And you're classes can start late too. My earliest class is @ 10:45...so I get to sleep in.
Well good luck with whatever you choose to do.
Teacup
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Me and my boyfriend were fighting a few days ago. We were swearing and stuff, and he goes "shut up you cooctie eyed bitc*. I don't really know what cooctie means and I tried looking it up but maybe he spelled it wrong so if anyone could help me figure out what he meant, that would be great. And I can't ask him because he's not talking to me anymore. Thank you. (link)
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he definitely meant cock-eyed...
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When I get a new boyfriend, it takes me a while to be comfortable around him. Even if we've been friends before, theres always a couple days of ackwardness for some reason, before we get like super close.
I want to know, how do I send my boyfriend signals like, that I want to hug him, hold his hand, kiss him, etc. Cause, we've only been going out for 3 days, but sometime I just want to wrap my arms around him. I don't want to "just do it" cause .. that would be weird. Hah, thanks! (link)
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Oh...he won't mind! He's your boyfriend...right? So don't worry about it. It's understandable that you may be a little shy, but if you want to wrap your arms around him, kiss him, or hold his hand..just do it. =]
Teacup
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I am 13 and I want my eyebrows to be *ok* for school.
well she wont let me wax. but she wants to pluck them. o well again =\
well anyways my question, is that she tells me your not supposed to take stuff of the top. only off the bottom? is this true? id like to know! Thanks! (link)
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When I pluck...I never take off the top. But that's because I don't know how to..and like the person below me said...I don't want to mess up my arch...oo and it hurts like hell since I'm not used to plucking the top.
But...when I do go to a salon and get them waxed...they do wax a little off the top to make the top look neat and the arch prettier.
So yeah...I would say don't take anything off the top. Plus...it means you have less to pluck.
Good Luck,
Teacup
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Ok well to start off im what you call a prep. I wear abercrombie & fitch hollister aeropastale american eagle & sometimes shop at pac sun & shop at buncha other stores with preppy brands. But my question is what are some good brand of shoes that are nice & that preps usually wear ? & That are black ? Because I just got white nikes & I was gonna get black ones to but my mom told me to get another brand. But the problem is I dont know what brand I should get. I want a preppy type brand. Cause I use to wear the skater shoes like dc & etnies (SP). But now I just want to dress all preppy. Instead of wearing the skater shoes. So what are some good brands & nice shoes that are black ?? If you can send a link to a picture that would be great. But you dont have to. Just give me a brand & where to buy them. Thanks in advance !! (link)
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Pumas are a pretty preppy brand, and are at any foot locker.
If not...you can try nine west, steve madden, or bebe.
Nine West...they have really cute flats...and tennis shoes..I didn't see any on the site, but I have seen at the store.
Steve Madden...same thing as Nine West.
http://www.stevemadden.com/category.asp?id=134
http://www.stevemadden.com/category.asp?id=132
I don't think I particularly like any of the black shoes on the link (from the sneakers) but I have seen some really cute ones in the store.
Well..hope it helps...
--Teacup
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Hi there. This is the first time asking advice like this. First let me start by saying. I am a 31 years old man.
now for my problem.
I have been with the same woman for 12-13 years. we have had 2 children together, one of whom passed away last year and the other that was just born this year. Lately we've been going throughsome rough times. She has been playing with my emotions. A virtual rollercoaster ride. One day i try to cuddle get intimate, and she'll say "We shouldn't do this" the next she's kissing me pationately. The problem i have, is that i have feelings for her how ever dwindled that they are, while exhibiting feelings for another woman. One who has captivated me over the last few weeks.
My issue is i don't feel that the relationship i am in is going anywhere. but with my new born baby i am kind of in a bind. thus my title. I am torn between 2 loves. Or three if you add in my newborn.
please help me figure out what i should do.
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Hi.
I am 18, and I realize that you may not want to get advice from a kid who has yet to really live life. But, I figure if you posted here, this must be killing you...so I guess it's worth a try.
I don't think you should stay in a relationship if you are not into it. Chances are you and your wife are going to grow further and further apart, so imagine how that will affect your child. All your child is going to see is his/her parents not having a normal relationship. Talk about giving your child issues when they start to form their own relationships. If you are unhappy with your wife, and you know wholeheartedly that you cannot be with her, then you can't. I think it's unfair for your wife and your child. Just, if you are going to be with another woman...make sure you are there for your child and your child's mother...both financially and in any other manner.
Good Luck,
Teacup
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my friend always tells me how everyone tells her shes sooo pretty. & like it gets annoying. & like im not jealous, because twice as many people tell me im pretty. so its not like im jealous. i just dont go around telling people, what other people say to me. like she does. so how can i make her stop?? besides saying like i dont care. bc i already tried that.. & well right now i just did & i can tell its turning into a fight. soo yahh
help? (link)
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It is annoying when people do this...because well...there's more important things to talk about other than how pretty other people think you are. Just tell her, that yes she's a pretty girl and that you already know this...and she doesn't need to keep telling you every day...and if she doesn't mind...there's other things that you consider more important that you would rather talk about.
By the way...I kind of thing your friend has like self-esteem issues because well she keeps obsessing over who thinks she is pretty. Chances are she feels the need to keep telling you, because she needs someone to validate that she is indeed pretty.
Well good luck.
-Teacup
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I love my schedule this year, but my english class is just horrible. The teacher only gave an A to one person last year, and it was a 90%. All of my friends have said she's extremely hard, and she even told us today that she is tough. This isn't an AP or honors class either. There are 3 other english classes that I could be in. I might fill out a schedule-change form to get a different teacher. If they don't let me change teachers, what do I do?? (link)
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Having a tougher teacher is better though. It challenges you more, and it forces you to go above what you would regularly do. I think you shouldn't sell yourself short and stick with it. And obviously getting an A is not impossible, you just have to work for it. I say...just stick with it...and don't take the easy way out. In life, there's no easy button...so what are you going to do when things get tough on you?
-Teacup
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i am not really sure how to KISS a guy, there is this one guy that i like and i know that he knows how to kiss good and i am gonna ask him out but if he says yes at sometime we are gonna kiss right??? so um how do u kiss or makeout with a guy and i am to embarrased to ask my mom or any of my friends. (link)
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The person who posted before me..said you don't ask a guy out..and I just wanted to tell you it's fine if you do. Of course, you have to brace yourself for whether or not he'll say yes...but...kudos to you for being a brave girl. And another thing...just because you are on a date doesn't mean you will kiss. Not everyone kisses on a first date...and if you're not completely comfortable and don't know him all that well..worry about getting to know him than just focusing on the kissing part. It's more important to have a great connection with the person...because it makes the kissing sooo much better.
But yeah...truth is..kissing comes very naturally. Go with the flow and you'll be fine.
Much Luck,
Teacup
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My friend really likes this one guy, but I talked to his friend about it and he told me that his friend really didn't like her that much. She REALLY really likes him, and I don't want her to get hurt. Should I tell her? (link)
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Definitely!
Think of a couple different scenarios...the guy she likes may tell her and end up completely crushing her.
If you don't tell her...she will keep having false hopes.
Someone else may tell her and tell her in a harsh way.
Coming from a friend, I think is best. Because you care enough for her not to want to hurt her, so you will tell her in a gentle way. Also, then you will be a pillar for her when she does feel bad about it.
-Teacup
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how do you get a guy to notice you??...there's this guy i really like but i dont really know when guys like me or like me back...guys just dont come up to me and ask me out... so how do i get this guy to like realize i exist..and how do i know a guy likes me.. and how do i start an relationship..please help...thanks
love &&hearts (link)
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Getting a guy to notice you is not that difficult. Just go up to them...talk to them...flirt a little. The hard part is figuring out whether or not they are interested because flirting is just a natural reaction...and it doesn't necessarily mean anything. If you want your crush to notice you, take the initiative and talk to him. It is not guaranteed that he'll reciprocate the crush...but hey if anything...you have a new friend and/or flirting buddy...which is not too bad. If he does like you...he's definitely going to treat you more special, and want to know more about you and hint at things concerning the two of you...those are typical signs...there's more and every guy is different...so it's not something you can really get from say a magazine. Everyone reacts differently...and boys are no exception.
Be bold, be you, and good luck!
-Teacup
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should i get surgery on my nose....i really hate how its kinda up pointed...and should i get surgery on my ear..cause one of my ears got messed up.. when my dad abused me..when i was little..btw i dont live with him........sum people tell me my ears look fine but i can tell where one is messed up...should i get surgery..im probly gonna get surgery any way i just wanna know what you think?? 14 almost 15 in a month=D/f (link)
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Well I have never had surgery...but I think if I felt strongly about something...I would pursue it. But, you are young still, and you may still be going through an awkward phase (and we all go through it), so you may not feel completely comfortable with yourself. Wait until you are 18-19...if you still feel badly about yourself...then you should do it..if that's what you really want. Because truth is...you may obsess over it for a long time. (If you are going to have surgery around 18...i suggest you don't spend the whole time thinking....i need surgery...then you won't really be seeing you...but something you made up).
I have seen a lot of plastic surgery stuff...and it looks mighty painful. So if you do get it..prepare to be in a great deal of pain for weeks after. And just try not to become a person who resorts to plastic surgery for everything..because I have also seen that it is an addicting thing.
So just remember...plastic surgery may have it's upsides...but like anything...it has negative qualities. Think it thoroughly, and whatever you choose to do...will be fine.
Good Luck,
Teacup
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i just got a gf a week ago and i'm really shy and i really want to get over it cuz i get really shy and stuff wen i'm with her around other people and i stop talking and get akward can someone plz tell me a way to get over being shy
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Being a girl...I can honestly say that the shyness thing makes guy seem cuter. But, shyness, in my opinion, is something everyone has to get over.
If you are with a group of people and your girlfriend...you should feel less shy because she's there...and she already thinks you are great (she wouldn't be dating you if she didn't think so), so her presence should make you feel a little more at ease. Try not to freak out and make it awkward...keep the conversation flowing. someone thinks you are a great guy, so you can obviously charm other people too.
You'll do fine, if you just relax =]
Much Luck,
Teacup
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