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that thing after two people break up and talk after
Hello,
I'm from Brazil.
I need to clarify that i'm a girl, who had a relationship with another girl, so if thats not something thats not approved here, feel free to not answer.
We broke up a year ago (or more) and yesterday she talked to me and apologized for everything that went bad in our past relashionship (and it was a lot, not just her fault), I did the same thing and then we talked about how our lives were going for the most of the day. Today I started a conversation about a random subject, but that was quick and then we didnt talk for the rest of the day. Now I'm not sure if she just wanted to apologize and that was it, or try and be friends again (which we were before we dated). I dont tend to start conversations and as I did it today, I was wondering If I should try it again tomorrow to see how that goes.
And she has a girlfriend now, even If I dont like her like that anymore its still a bit weird.
Sorry it's so long and superficial, thank you for taking the time if you did.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
She has a girlfriend. Leave it alone.
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When it comes to relationships, we all end up assuming a lot of things. Every assumed thought gives rise to more thoughts, imaginations, fantasies and what not.
Based on what you described it seems like you still love your girlfriend or at least value the friendship you shared with her at some point. There is no need for you to think so much about it. If she has to be part of your life, she will be no matter what. As long as your heart and intentions are clean, don't worry about the outcome. Perhaps she is thinking on the same lines as you.
So just plan to meet at a quiet place may be outdoor. Take a deep breath and just start opening your heart slowly. It will be little uncomfortable to begin but once you start talking with her with an open heart, things will just flow. Don't plan and think a lot before the meeting. In fact no one needs to tell you what exactly you should talk to her. Just trust your heart completely and go with it. Surrender yourself to the love you have towards her (not necessary romantic love but genuine unconditional love and another being). Do not worry about what and how would she react to your talk. If she understands you, she would start sharing as well and you both may end up crying :) By being yourself and being true to your heart, you would be helping her to open up as well. Hope I made sense.
Good luck and do update when you have a soul-to-soul conversation with her.
Love always!
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I'd have the same thing to say as Razhie did with one thing added. I don't know how well you know the new mate or not, but this gal may feel really weird with you hanging around as just a friend considering you used to be an ex. It would be the same thing if talking about male boyfriends. The new gf, if she's not totally 100% feeling secure as to her status in the relationship and being self confident and mature, she could feel jealous and there could be trouble with her.
Just keep that in mind so you're not surprised if it happens. Just find out if your ex wants to re-establish a friendship with you and you might also discuss how much time each of you have to spend as friends and how much time each of you need. If she wants this, then realize that any issues the other gal has are entirely her own and you are not at fault. It is something for her to learn to grow more confident and your ex to treat her in such a way that supports her and builds her confidence and security in the relationship. It has nothing to do with you. Don't play the contact game with each of you sending a text or two, then nothing but wait. Either get on the phone for a phone call, a real convo back and forth and ask her, don't guess or ask face to face.
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Do you want to be friends again? You left that bit out.
Forget about what she might want for a minute, or have intended. What do you want? If you want to be friends again, then keep on starting friendly conversations. If you don't, then don't start those conversations.
I'd guess that she probably just wanted to apologize and make some peace, but that'd just be me guessing. You have more information about this person than any random person online can ever have, so you should trust our guesses.
If you want to know for sure, you could just ask her if she would want to try and be friends again or not.
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