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33 year female virgin, never masturbated, should i be?
I'm quite embarrassed to say that I am a 33 year old female virgin and have never masturbated. I don't think there is something wrong with me, it's just an opportunity to have sex never happened. But now I am constantly thinking of sex, getting sexual urges sometimes for days on end etc. I am even thinking of getting a vibrator just to please the urges. I am quite scared to do it, since it will be my first experience but I am also quite excited at what I might feel. Is there something wrong with me or my sexual urges? Will it calm the urges a bit if I masturbate? I am quite shy about this subject as sex and masturbate is not a common subject in my family / friends circle. I am quite a sorry Suzi / sad case and feel like I am doing something so out of character by ordering a vibrator. Any advice? Should I masturbate?
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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Virginity?
Most women do own vibrators because ALL women get sexual urges, the same as men, it's nothing to be ashamed of! You have no reason to be scared either! If you can get your hands on a bullet or a rabbit vibrator, I've found those to be best! Then it's just down to self experimentation to see what you like. If you feel like you want to masturbate, then yes, you should masturbate!
Ruby xo
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Don't listen to that Julia girl below me because that's a religious belief that masturbartion is wrong or whatever and it also DOES NOT spoil sex. Yeah, if you don't have a husband or boyfriend get a vibrator or dildo, it really helps.
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Hi, i don't suggest you to masturbate. I have done it and totally regret it, because sex is something special, don't ruin it with masturbation. Anyway if you decide to do it, you don't need to buy a vibrator, because most of pleasure comes from clitoris, so just rub it. Anyway, i don't suggest you to start, because it won't solve your problems. After i started to masturbate my urges became stronger and more often
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Well any of those things will certainly do the trick but if you don't mind my asking why are you not considering the possibility of a relationship? You say you have never had the opportunity to have sex but you don't say why. Are you putting yourself in situations where you could meet people? Vibrators are nice but they are no match for the real thing!If you are just not interested in a relationship that is perfectly fine but it just seemed a bit curious the way you put, it like maybe you don't leave your home or something! I am just getting a feeling there is some much better advice I could give you if I knew the whole story! Best wishes!
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I cant say why it happens but some people plain old never get a sex drive or desires, some can have a low one or a high one all. So their life, and lastly....like you not have a sex drive for years until well into adulthood and finally its like a switched was flicked on...instant urges.
I had a chance to watch a documentary of a handful of people who were in their 30's and 40s and had never had sex with a partner. Some had also never masturbated such as 30something single woman who was deep in the church faith and all family and friends did not discuss that, sex other than marriage taboo or something like that. She decided to have her first experience and was interviewed after finding a man she wanted to have the one night stand with, and she was ecstatic. For all, the hardest thing was getting beyond the fear of stigma if others knew, the fear of never having done it, etc. but once past the first try, all fear melted away and all people in the documentary now had self confidence to continue on to explore their sexuality.
Masturbating is a good way to go. You can also learn to finger your clitoris. Get a mirror and view this part of yourself down there. Locate your clitoris. There are lots of good videos on you tube to find good diagrams and info on sex and how to's help. Vibrators vary. Most are battery operated and for me, are constantly running out of power or the piece isn't made too well and after some time burns out. Also, some are more powerful than others, and are made for different reasons. Go to a sex toy shop. The girls there are always very helpful and no one thought anything of me being odd the first time I went into such a shop, long after I was first married and told them I had never been in such a place and knew nothing and wanted to know about all the toys they had. They are always glad to help and understand that for whatever reason, someone may not come into the shop until well into their adult years, so don't be afraid. Go enjoy shopping. You may decide you are not feeling enough sensation from the one you buy to get any orgasms so if thats the case, go back, tell them what you have and that you need something different. I have bought countless ones before finding one I like. Then someday it finally dies and I need another and they dont carry it anymore. Just keep trying cus its worth it to find what works on you and all of us are different in what works on us. Good luck!
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You shouldn't be embarrassed! If you're thinking about trying masturbation, why not go for it? It's very different from an experience with another person so don't think of it as losing your first experience. That will be just as special and different when it does happen whether you've tried masturbation or not. As for calming urges, it may or it may not depending on the person. You can only really find out once you try it. Since you're shy about this, it might be a good idea to try without a vibrator first. This might not make sense, but you shouldn't try using a power drill before you know how to use a screwdriver. Start small and easy just using your hands. Get comfortable with that and work your way up to the vibrator. Once you've had a little experience, buying a vibrator might not be so scary and you might even have a better idea of what you want. It seems like you really want to try and just needed a little reassurance. Go for it and good luck! :)
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The best way to enjoy masturbation is to find someplace quiet, secure from intrusion and comfortable. Other than that many people enjoy masturbating in the shower in the morning letting the water cover any noise they may make.
Hope this helps.
Masturbation is a very personal subject. Should you masturbate is something you should decide. What I will tell you is that according to a recent study about 85% of us do masturbate. This study include single men and women as well as couples. Masturbation includes the singular type you are asking about as well as the type done by couples, mutual masturbation, as foreplay or young adults as an alternative to sexual intercourse. It includes Girls giving guys hand jobs, guys fingering girls. Oral sex also can be considered a form of mutual masturbation since it is not intercourse.
Masturbation is a safe and generally pleasant way to relieve sexual tension. Safe because the women can not get pregnant. Pleasant because you can relax in private and allow yourself to pleasure yourself in a manner no one else can as you know your likes and dislikes as far as where to touch yourself for the greatest of pleasure.
A vibrator should increase your pleasure during masturbation. Being a virgin the first time you penetrate yourself it will probably hurt as it will be no different than giving your virginity to some guy, depending on the size of the vibrator and if it is meant for vaginal penetration. The more times you penetrate yourself the less it will hurt.
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