I need advice to get over my e boyfriend im 15 years old . I just cant get over him its really hard but all he wants to sex but he would stop talking to me for a while I always felt like it was me I just need advice to get over him . he played a lot of mind games
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category? Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health? GiddyGeezer answered Saturday April 12 2014, 6:12 pm: I had a similar experience and I know what you are going through. It is very hard to get over your first love, especially if he was your first sexual experience as well. The best thing to do is start dating again and make sure this time that the guy is really into you and not just after sex. Find someone you have a lot in common with. Go places and have fun, really get to know each other before sex enters into the relationship. Your first love will always have a special place in your heart but you have to let go and move on or you will just end up getting more and more miserable and believe me life is a LOT more fun if you are out there living it instead of locked away in your room pining over some guy who used you and moved on. (By the way,and I speak from experience)don't buy any of his crap the next time he shows up, says he is sorry and still loves you and of course thinks he can prove it with some kissing, cuddling and make-up sex. If you go for it this guy will show up every time he gets horny and can't find a willing partner but he still won't know you the next day. Please move on!Good luck! [ GiddyGeezer's advice column | Ask GiddyGeezer A Question ]
Dragonflymagic answered Sunday April 6 2014, 9:59 pm: I know first relationships can feel special, its all new experience and can be exciting except for when a guy doesn't treat you right. You want a guy to pay you attention but you want him to treat you like a princess, not a sex object.
The whole reason behind dating is to experience lots of different guys so you can begin to form your own ideas of what is good and not good about a guy, what you like in a guy and what you are looking for, what you want to avoid. You will move on to date many guys before you end up with one you marry or have a long term relationship with.
So considering the reasons for the practice of 'dating', to get over this one, look at it as one of those dating learning experiences. What did you learn that you can put on an actual list of good traits wanted / bad traits to avoid in a guy?
I hope you saw it, that a guy pressuring you for sex is something you don't want.
A guy treating you as a sex object is also something to avoid
He cares more about his feelings than yours-avoid
He throws a little tantrum when he doesn't get what he wants from you by giving you the cold shoulder and not talking-avoid.
He plays mind games--avoid.
This a great. Thats a lots of good stuff to look at other guys and if you see that behavior in them when they interact with you or other people, avoid the guy. Learn to recognize what some of the early signs of this behavior are. At 15, you may not see them so quick at first but over time, if you are looking for them, you'll get so good at spotting the troublesome traits that you can walk into a party and by spending a little times observing people, begin to spot the guys to avoid and won't even have to date them to find out.
Some are good at hiding their true self but can't keep the false image going forever, its too much work so if after the third date he finally does something you don't like, thats on your Avoid list, tell him you are done with dating him and not to bother coming after you and leave him!
It takes time for the feelings connected to a guy to go away. But they will, Keep busy with other things as already suggested. StART making your list of good/bad traits...I mean this literally, whether written on a document saved on computer. You'll add to it with each relationship. Once you feel you are already to look for a marriage partner, you'll know what you're looking for which makes the right guy easier to spot. Its a constructive thing to do after each break up.
If you have a really nice guy, many good qualities but he breaks up cus he doesnt feel the same 'spark' of attraction that you do, its hurts but that is very common in real life, both need to feel the same. So put all the good traits of that guy down on your list. You aren't getting him back, but you can look at the list and remind yourself to look for those good traits in the next guy. Dont wait for someone to ask you. If you think you see some who looks like a possibility, go introduce yourself and eventually ask him out. Good luck dear! [ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question ]
lightoftruth answered Sunday April 6 2014, 9:12 pm: Every time you go through a break up, it takes time to heal. Even if you guys were dating for only a month, it would still take time to get over it.
You already know he's no good for you and you wouldn't want a guy like him in your life. That's really good that you acknowledge that and realize that you deserve better.
So pretty much you need to give yourself time to get over him. In the mean time, don't text or call him, don't hang out with him. Whenever you start thinking about him, find something else to do. Break ups are a great time to start working on yourself and giving yourself "me time". Go try new things. Like new hobbies or sports, go out with your friends and enjoy your life. Keep your eye out for new guys you may like and a crush will definitely preoccupy your mind. [ lightoftruth's advice column | Ask lightoftruth A Question ]
DemiGoddess94 answered Sunday April 6 2014, 12:50 pm: It might be tough at first, but just give it time. First off you're 15..after this blows over you'll realize plenty of other guys want to date you and that you can do way better. when you graduate high school you're going to look back and be like, I can't believe cared that much..or you wont remember him at all. I know this from experience. [ DemiGoddess94's advice column | Ask DemiGoddess94 A Question ]
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