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I…want… REVENGE
My “friend" is totally ditching me for some brat, and I can prove it. When I told her how I felt, she said that I can sit next to her at lunch. But the brat who drowned her a couple years ago but is all of a sudden her best friend, was sitting next to her, and refused to move. In fact, the brat started to scream at me, and my “friend" just told me to sit in front of her. I'm not letting her get away with it. I'm gonna tell my other friend why my ex-friend REALLY isn't going to her party. But I wanna do more. Any ideas?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Sweetie, I completely understand where you are coming from, for when I was in my freshman year, my so called friend completely ditched me for someone else. She replaced me and made another individual her best friend. For the longest time I wanted her to feel the same way I did, so I would avoid her, ignore her and hang out with completely different people. But then I realized, exactly what is it that I am even getting out of this revenge? And the answer to that was, hatred, increased jealousy and pain. You see, I was trying to do what she did to me, but at the same time I didn't want to lose her. The whole thought of revenge was making matters worse, because in the end, instead of coming out straight with my feelings, I was avoiding them and pushing her away. Revenge is not sweet, no matter how good it may look to you. Do not rely on revenge to give you happiness. The only one who can give you true happiness is yourself. It's your choice to decide the rest. I know it can be hard, trust me but take the high road and talk to her face to face.
-SM
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It sucks when one of your friends want to spend time with someone else that you don't like. It happens all the time.
When I was in middle school/early high school, my best friend hung out with the girl who I just hated. I wanted to get back at her but I knew it would be stupid and just not solve any of the problems.
Revenge never works. It usually just backfires. If it doesn't, it'll just hurt more people than just the ones you were trying to get revenge on. I mean now you're going to hurt your other friend by telling her about your ex friend.
Honestly, this is all just middle school drama. I have no idea how old you are, but you sound super young. If you aren't, then you should probably drop this revenge stuff because it's something that kids do because they don't know any better. Even if you are young, you should let this go because it's just unnecessary drama about to happen.
I don't really think this is your friends fault. I mean the most she's done is chose someone who might not be the nicest person to be her friend.
I mean she did take your feelings into consideration when she said you can sit by her at lunch. Instead it was her friend that was the one who didn't move and screamed. That wasn't your friends fault. She could have said something, but that would have just caused more drama and maybe your friend just isn't confident enough to do that.
So what you need to do is let this go and move on. If you're still mad at your friend, then just go find new friends instead of holding grudges.
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Are you female? Because it sure sounds like it. Boys get their differences out in wrestling and fist fights and then forget about the past and go on as best friends never referring back to the past, not get emotionally upset or irriatated by a person or stewing about it and not able to let a situation just go.
I am definitely not going to give you ideas of things to do that help you continue to dwell on what sounds like out of control hormonal caused feelings. What else could it be? The hormone related problems of puberty don't come around and leave again as soon as you start your period, their emotional effects are with you for quite a few years maybe not leaving until you are 17, 18. It'll cause you to feel either extremely sad and you cry easily for nothing, or you get angry or irritated very easily and usually its an anger directed at another female who most likely has done nothing to earn your anger, like mom, a sister, a friend or female classmate. I had 3 daughters, I should know. They'd scream and yell at each other and wanna pull each others hair out. Once past the emotional hormone stages of life, now in their 20's they are very loving sisters and supportive of each other.
Trust me that you will out grow this. So don't make things worse by trying to use the girl you don't like as the focus of angry deeds. Remember that it isn't just you, but every girl goes through this and at times will not make the best decisions or may hurt peoples feelings. I understand that it hurts if your friend doesnt have enough time for full attention for you but there really isn't anything wrong with having several friends or groups of friends in school.
When I was in high school, (I'll make up some names-not their real ones,) sometimes I spent time with Eileen one on one. She didn't know any of my other friends, I knew her from church youth group. Then I had a friend Gina who once we got our licenses, would go driving together just to explore area's near our neighborhoods we'd never seen and she had two friends from middle school who became my friends and for school related time, the four of us spent time together hanging out. Then there was also the friends I had in a before school bible study group created by us kids. Some guys were part of it and the girls were mostly all younger than me but I began good friends with them all at school, and with one...away from school. So for one on one friends, I had basically 3 and none of them knew the other or cared. Find a group to join in school for the purpose of meeting new friends, not to hurt your other friend, but to have others to spend time with. Heck even as adults, we have our friends we like going shopping thrift stores together, the friends to chill with in the backyard or go to the beach with, if we are into cooking or yoga or something, taking evening classes together, etc...But I don't have one friend I do it all with. Some I spend more time with, others less. As you grow older, you'll see more of this, and it is natural, its okay. If you find you can't ignore your feelings, you may want mom to take you for a visit to your family Dr. to check to see if your hormones are greatly out of balance because that will cause you to feel so out of control angry to the point of trying to dream up revenge, instead of just being occasionally irritated and losing your patience sometimes. I'd bet this irritating girl is having the same hormonal issues you are. If thats what you have and the Dr. get s you put on medication for it, you'd only have to take it for a couple of years until you get past the imbalance period and it naturally goes into balance as you grow older. You may be able to tell this other girl about it and suggest her mom take her to see a Dr.
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