|
Cheating boyfriend?
I've been dating my bf for 3 1/2 months I really adore him but I have a feeling he might be cheating. I'm really emotionally unstable and untrusting because of all my past relationships so its hard for me to trust. I saw a dick pic on his phone that wasn't sent to me but then he explained that he was gonna sext me one night when we were talking dirty etc. I got so upset and he got really upset and apologized for everything and said I was his world and he didn't want to lose me. He is always there to reasure me that things are ok and always answers questions when I have them. Also what bothered me was that he didn't shave for a week and said he was too lazy to (he usually shaves everyday), he changed up his haircut a bit because he said he was bored, and also he said he wanted to shave his happy trail cause it made him hot lol. That made me a little nervous like why the sudden change in appearance? I looked through his phone and didn't find anything but I was so paranoid and thought maybe he deleted stuff. Its driving me insane I really do love him but i'm just so insecure. Help?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You might be a bit paranoid, but if I was you I would keep a look out, just in case. Good luck
]
The thing that you or any other woman should understand is that men are biologically programmed to be promiscuous and deal with more than 1 woman. It's in his nature. You either have to live with it or be single forever because every man is liable of cheating since it's his nature and in his biological makeup for over millions of years.
Check out the following links to articles I'd written on this:
The biology of cheating men: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
What women should understand about men: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
]
You already recognize that the issue is with yourself so lets focus on you. I have in the past taken notes from relationship experts on line to be able to share pointers with those who write for advice. Here is what I have to share that hopefully helps:
Some women give their love and devotion to a guy who doesn't deserve it, who is wrong for her
while others no matter how plain and simple the signs are of his love and devotion, they don't see it or trust it because of lack of self confidence.
1 A woman's insecurity and neediness will kill a man's love
Do you love me, do you love me? No matter what he says or does, she never believes him, even if he's never done anything to earn her distrust.
2 It's impossible to love others and be loved by others unless you love yourself first.
Don't look to a man for all your self esteem and self worth. Have it already before relationship..
3. Men do not show love the same way women do. For them it's how they feel when she is around and how she fulfills the dreams of the woman he's always wanted and how possessive he feels if another man was paying too much attention to her. Some women tranlate love into his obsession for her and devotion while men translate her love for him as being appreciated and respected.
7 Questions to know if he really loves you
1. Does he say I love you. For some, it's a hard thing to say but they show it to you in other ways. When he says “I love you”, he is viewing that as a commitment to you. It is not a flippant phrase.
Saying I love you too early like during first couple dates is a warning about the guy. Its a very good chance he is needy and wanting a woman to be his mom. Other phrases from a guy count too, like you're awesome, I adore you. You're the woman I always dreamed of.
2. Does he make you a priority in his life? Guys have more than one priority...things very important to him but you should be one of top 3.
What he does for you or how he acts can't be faked easily because it's hard to lie with your body. Things he does without having to be asked, making dinner, picking up something for a collection for you have, making time for you, even if it's a walk or going to a movie. If the guy likes you, he'll make time for you at least a quarter of the time.
3 Does he tell friends about you and like to show you off? Have you been introduced to his family and friends? If he keeps you separate, he's hiding something or ashamed or fearful of something
4. Does he care about your pleasure during sex? Is he only into seeking his own pleasure or your's too. Does he open his eyes and want to have both your eyes connect while making love?
5. Does he respect and encourage you? Respect means, does he value your opinion, do you share decisions and treats you as a partner. Are you encouraged by him to have your own friends and hobbies outside the relationship and encourage you to seek your dreams and uphold you in that.
Jealousy is not love, it's control. It's okay to be protective, but jealousy shouldn't be what prompts the protectiveness
6. Do your friends and family like how he treats you? Others make a great gauge for judging a guys character.
7. Does he look at you with lust and passion in his eyes, with a hunger and thirst for you? Does he give you admiring looks, does he still want to sneak peeks down your shirt. What he sees is Very important since guys are visually stimulated. If he isn't looking anymore, he has lost his interest. All men because of this natural trait, will also view other women but do so discreetly, without being an ass about it. Don't expect a man to look at only you. If he doesn't look at other women at all, it may be a sign that he is gay. You do want a man who is visually stimulated by a woman.
If after reading all that, you still don't feel secure, I'd suggest some self help books or going to see a therapist. Goodluck dear!
]
I hate to burst your bubble but it sounds to me like he's playing games and trying to make you paranoid. I say while your still young, breakup with him and if he wasn't cheating he'll come around sooner or later...but if he was, he'll be in no hurry coming back to you. In all honesty, if you think someone is cheating on you you're not fully satisfied with your relationship with that person. You need a break or you need to just move on to a much better person, because you deserve to have a great relationship with none of those problems at all sweetie. I hope I helped you out a little bit.
Sincerely, ASK-LACEY
]
When you found the pic was it just in his pictures or was it sent to someone else?
I mean obviously, if it went to someone else then he's cheating but if it was just in his pictures, who knows.
You won't be able to know he's cheating until you actually find out.
Besides that, I don't think it's a good time for you to be in a relationship. You really adore him, and that's good but you need to work on yourself.
You have some issues to deal with, like not being able to trust and even though you have very good reason not to, it can ruin future relationships. Also with being emotionally unstable, it's not good to be in a relationship until you are stable. I mean everything he does, you're going to be paranoid. Maybe he is cheating, maybe he's not but you don't trust him and relationships don't work without trust.
]
You found a dick on his phone? Who was it sent too?
I would be a bit suspicious, Sounds like he may of came up with a lie to cover his ass honey. Not worth it
]
More Questions: |