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Who should make the first move?
Ok, so this is not really about me, but I have a question just in general. So guys & girls who should make the first move in a relationship? Is it more proper for boys too? Or should it not matter? Thanks for the feed back!
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No it shouldn't matter.
When just starting the dating game or a relationship, neither gender has had any experience how to do so. It will feel awkward in the beginning no matter who goes first.
Typically we see the males make the first move. In nature, we hear the male birds make their mating calls and the female responds to him if she is interested. There is something in a guy that make him more likely to make the first move. But many hold back for fear of being rejected. So if a gal suspects that may be whats holding a guy back whom seems to have interest but not acting on it, then it is fine to make a move. Ask in a way that he feels comfortable answering truthfully no matter if the answer is yes or no.
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I think it's kinda a preference. I don't think that it should really matter though.
I mean years and years ago, it was the proper thing for guys to make the first move but now it's getting common for girls to make the first move.
A lot of girls are more shy than the boys, so they think the guys should make the first move. While there are guys out there who think the girls should make the first move as well.
So honestly, I think if you like someone then just make the first move. It's not really an uncommon thing for either gender to make the first move anymore.
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It's shouldn't matter.
Just like race or gender shouldn't really matter when you are hiring someone - it shouldn't matter who makes the first move, the girl or the guy.
But just like race and gender often DO matter when it comes to hiring someone - it often does matter.
Some people (girls and guys) don't want to be the one to make the first move. Often because they are shy or insecure - they justify it and say that it's the other person's JOB to do make the first move. It's mostly girls who says this ("But the guy is SUPPOSED to make the first move!") but I've also heard it from guys ("Girls make the first move on me all the time. Why should I bother if she's not going too?")
Both positions are arbitrary and childish.
But here is the simple, vital truth when it comes to romance and dating:
You can be as arbitrary, childish and even discriminatory as you'd like to be!
Romance dating and sex is one of the few things were people are entirely entitled to be any kinf of asshole they want to be, even racist assholes, and although it might be ugly, they are entitled to make their choices for any stupid reason they like.
So the real question isn't who SHOULD make the first move. The real question is why kind of people are you going to end up being compatible with?
If you are a girl who thinks guys should always make the first move, then you'll never date anyone who doesn't - you aren't compatible with guys who don't make the first move.
If you are a guy who thinks it's slutty or masculine for a girl to make the first move, then you'll never date a girl who does - you aren't compatible with girls who make the first move.
As purely stupid as I think it is that some people thinks it's OTHER peoples' job to express interest (rather than, ya know, just being honest about what they personally want regardless of their gender) people can still do what they want, and will most likely end up with people who feel they same way they do about 'the first move'.
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