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He's always talking about sex with celebrities


Question Posted Tuesday March 19 2013, 12:42 am

The guy I'm talking to is always talking about girls he'd like to have sex with. We'll be talking about something and all of a sudden he'll send me a pic of a celebrity and be like "I would last 3 seconds man those legs she'd be mad but I would be the happiest man alive". Am I wrong to have my feelings hurt? Everytime he does that i just want to cry and i dont really know why. hes not one of those guys you can be emotionally vulnerable eith either so im stuck keeping it bottled in. I know we're not technically dating but I just think its disrespectful i never do that to him so why does he do that to me? I can't help but think maybe hes not even really interested in me. I get guys are naturally sexual people but does he have to always tell me about all the girls he'd like to screw? I'm 22 and he's 19 btw

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lightoftruth answered Wednesday March 20 2013, 2:27 am:
He is being completely rude. I've talked to guys who would talk about hot a celebrity is and still kinda found it rude because they claimed to be interested in me, and I don't know why they want to talk about how other girls are hot when they're trying to get your attention.
I've also gone on a couple of dates with a guy who ended up talking about "how could a girl like her get a guy like him" and then showed me pictures of his model ex girlfriend.
Anyways, I'd stop talking to him. He seems like he needs to mature.

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xokristabelle answered Tuesday March 19 2013, 11:28 am:
While I don't know him, I've had guys do the same thing to me, and often they are trying to make you jealous so you want them more (I've even had a guy try to show me nudes of his last hookup)- it's a weird little game they play. It is disrespectful and rude and nobody like that is worth your time. He probably still has a lot of growing up to do and you can do better.


-Krista, 22/f

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adviceman49 answered Tuesday March 19 2013, 10:03 am:
The biggest part of the problem that I see is at the end of your message. He is 19 and you are 22. Numerically this is not a big deal; maturity wise he is still an immature teenager.

There is also the possibility, again from your writing, that he sees you more as a friend, a buddy someone he can talk to like any of his other pals. You also say you are not technically dating.

Still I believe his immaturity is the biggest problem her. I'm not sure what "not technically dating means" though I would say no matter what the definition is he is also being very rude to you and disrespectful of you when he does these things. These conversations you talk about are not the type I think are appropriate to have with a lady friend.

I believe the question is not whether he is interested in you, but are you interested enough in him that you really want to continue this relationship? If you are then he has to learn to accept that others have feeling and you can be emotionally vulnerable with him. A good relationship does not consist of sex alone; talking about it or having a sexual relationship.

A good relationship starts with getting to know one another. This is part sexual and part learning about each other likes, dislikes and vulnerabilities. The fact he is unwilling to see that side of you or allow you to show him that side of you tells me to suggest to you that you should re evaluate this relationship.

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rainhorse68 answered Tuesday March 19 2013, 8:44 am:
19 is possibly a bit old to be obsessively fantasising about celebrities, and of course it is fantasy. Do you think he's a bit emotionally immature in general? They're not actually a 'threat' to you, naturally. He's never going to dump you for a date with Beyonce really, is he? He sounds a bit of a dead-loss to me unless he grows up a bit. I mean, a guy might have a 'tongue-in-cheek' and meaningless chat like that with his male friends, but with a girl...it's a bit odd. Only other thing I can think of is he's using it a bit to get your conversations focussed on sex, to show you he's 'a sexual person'.He's 'setting his stall out', you might say by, projecting these feelings onto celebities, rather than you...but they're MEANT for you. You're a little older...so are the celebrities (?)... suggesting that he likes 'older women' maybe?? If you follow? Sounds a bit complex. But projection is complex when you analyse it, but it's not uncommon. Whether that's acceptable or not is up to you, and how you see the relationship unfolding. Possibly, he might just like winding you up...so maybe look for someone a little more adult.

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Razhie answered Tuesday March 19 2013, 7:19 am:
That's incredibly immature and rude.

Causal disrespect like that during the early phase of getting to know someone (when they should, in theory, be on their best behavoir) should be a deal breaker.

He might be interested in you, but if he can't behave respectfully and help you feel safe with him, so what if he's interested? Are you interested in him?

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Xui answered Tuesday March 19 2013, 1:25 am:
He isn't exactly would I would call boyfriend material. Sounds like you got your answer, He is all about sex not commitment. If he is talking to you one minute then sending you pictures and talking about sex, he isn't listening nor showing interest in you. Basically he is rude and very immature. Take a pass

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