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What should I do with school etc? Should I homeschool?
Hi, I'm a 14/male in high school (UK). Now, I don't think I really fit in, I have friends but they aren't good friends at ALL. To be honest, I wouldn't even class them as my friends. I want to get home schooled and really don't want to go back. My parents have finally (kind of) come round to the idea but they want me to go back on Tuesday and I really don't want to so I said I'm not going. I don't want to cause trouble for him but I just can't cope at school I don't know why. Don't fit in and stuff I guess, I want time to sort my appearance out and try to boost my confidence which is really low right now. Should I go ahead? The way I think of it is:
Option A) Go to school, stay with no confidence, stay with bad friends, no social life but get a few more GCSEs.
Option B) Home educated, try build confidence, away from 'friends' but a few less GCSEs and no social life.
I really am willing to try and sort my life out, but I just can't go on there. What would you do?
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Hi,
I think the first thing to remember is that you're not enjoying school, and you have a lack of confidence (possibly due to bullying?)
Anyway, most fourteen years olds, yself included, suffered from a severe lack of confidence at high school. I'm 17 now, and trust me it gets better.
In my mind, everyone gets bullied/or has low self esteem, so you needn't think it's just you. It's how you deal with it that counts.
Honestly, without knowing you I do think it's best to stay in school, because if you get homeschooled then you'll be on your own, so you're not putting you'reself out there at all, which could turn you into a recluse, which is harder to get away from.
No matter how much you don't like it, just by turning up you're giving yourself opportunities-the opportunity to talk to people, to socialise, to jsut experience a normal schooling career.
I know someone who was homeschooled, and with no disrespect to the advice giver below, they're miserable. They say the only people in their lives was their family, and now they're in maintream college, they still've got no one.
I'm the most shy person, and yeh I'm the same as you. But you have to consider this, Would you rather sacrifice being totally unhappy and slightly lonely during your teenage years, just for a few weeks of freedom from incondfidence?
And also, you need to work on socialising outside school, because once you've left school you'll realise it isn't just about education, it's the skills you develop outide, such as joining an interest group and achieving goals, that will secure you're happiness in the future I think.
Obviously we can only give you advice on here, and what you do is down to your final desision, so its important that it is that and you let no one-parents, friends, teachers choose for you.
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I have a different approach having been home-schooled over brutal bullying myself. There's NOTHING wrong in my mind with doing that IF and only if you are supervised and receive all the same credits as everyone else does when course are done you have to be bloody motivated though and make learning and completing courses priority number 1.
My second IF is that you absolutely MUST have a social outlet and exercise as well that replaces the one you would lose at school. This means being involved in karate, drama, parks and rec courses for young people to build on that.
Third IF: You NEED to work with a psychiatrist not a therapist or psychologist on what's causing all your social problems and ways to overcome it so you can actually function as believe me home-schooled or conventional schooled it's going to dog you until you learn to thrive.
Finally, rather than leave school automatically explain to your parents and current educators on Tuesday in a meeting why you feel compelled to leave and ask them if it would be possible to send you to a school that gives adults credits for high school either in the day or the night. You'll find great friends that way who aren't apt to judge you much like I had. That's a better option as you are socializing with people who are actually mature who may be slightly older as well as adults with jobs. Maybe that's your ticket.
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How about C none of the above. I can understand how you feel and why homeschooling seems like a good answers. There is nothing wrong with homeschooling but I do not see it as the answer to your problem.
I see a deeper problem here. The main one being low self esteem. Homeschooling will not resolve this in and of its own. To resolve this issue requires professional guidance that public school and your parents aren't capable of providing. Public schools simply because they are underfunded and your parents because they are too close to the problem.
Now there are private schools with smaller classes where the teachers do have the time and the funding to help you in this area. You get a proper education. You learn why you have low self esteem and how to raise your self esteem. All of this in one package if your parents can afford it. This would be option A and the better option.
Now if your parent scan not afford a private school then option B is. To be home schooled and to have you seen by a therapist to work on the low self esteem issue. The reason this is not the best option is homeschooling lacks the personnel inter-relationships that a public or private school provide that is needed to go with working on you low self esteem. That and the fact that I am not sure how the public health service works and if you could receive help for this issue under public health.
Talk to your parents about option A. I'm faily certain you can find a good private school that can help you.
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