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Im shy and its hard for me to make friends
I use to get bullied and now im scared to talk to people. I really want to make friends but people think because i dont talk that i dont like them or something. I started doing online school this year but i thought it would be better if i went back so i could at least try to make friends. Does any one have any tips on how to be less shy or how i could make new friends.
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Well, entering a school that you would actually have to attend would be a good start. Just let go of that feeling that you cant talk to people, leave getting bullied in the past, move on from it and dont let it affect your whole life. start out trying to make conversation with people at the supermarket, the mall, whichever, a cashier, or someone in the mall, ask them a question about what clothing would look better with these pants, or shirt, etc... just for starters to try an open up. Goodluck to you -Istalio
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The problem is that you aren't confident and strong enough in who you are. You haven't accepted yourself, the qualities you possess, gifts etc. and people are seeing that fear and backing off.
Once you just let yourself go and stopping sweating the small stuff and what anyone thinks people will flock to you. Don't think, over analyze just let everything you do unfold. Be who you are and people will respond positively.
I know that it would be in your best interest to be in a regular school. What you need to do differently this time is set up a support network of teachers, counselors, principals who know of the bullying issue and will watch over you to give you a sense of security.
Next join student council with their assistance. This forces you to work with people of different backgrounds, share your ideas and work towards goals. You'll find friendships just happen that way and they last.
Next, I don't know where you reside but there has to be a theater group or kick ass drama class or studio someplace (even if you have to go to a city do it). Take improvisation--you need it. It teaches you trust, that it's okay to make an idiot of yourself, and several games and coping strategies. You have to work together on sketches and problem solving. You'll never notice you're doing it.
It also helps with conversations with other people as you're always complimenting the other actor with the next logical idea in a conversation. This for you will change your world. Hang in there. It may take time but it will change. It also is vital too for knocking down the wall of defense you put up around you.
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Hi,
I was bullied my freshman year of high school. I hadn't hit puberty yet, I was afraid of the new environment, and I was uncomfortable being surrounded by people all the time. I went through major depression for a couple of years before I started high school. I found anxiety pills helped ease social pressure and I eventually became comfortable enough to no longer need medication as a crutch. Most of the anxiety was paranoid thoughts I couldn't suppress. As the pressure eased, I found that making friends was no longer a problem. The last thing you want is to appear as weak. Stand up to your bully even if it means getting a black eye. Trust me, would you rather be looked at as insecure and pushed-around or as someone who doesn't tolerate being taunted? Push past your fears and get outside of that box you place yourself in and walk into the world. You want to get recognized as someone who is respected? Put yourself in the places you feel most uncomfortable and don't psych yourself out. Take every minute as it comes and don't worry about what will happen. If you accidentally come off as silly, laugh at yourself. People will notice less about the embarrassing factor if it is omitted from the environment. You create the tone with the ones who surround you. How you react to everyone is important as it will factor how they react to you. What also helps, join clubs. Take on a sport. I was invited to parties only because I was on the same team. Try getting assigned to classes with fewer people, that'll help bring your peers closer together and you will have better chances at being included. If you feel you hit it off with a new classmate, ask them to hang out after school sometime or the weekend. Maybe it will go awkward at first but if they say yes then there's obviously something they see in you to give it a chance. Find out the latest gossip, locate parties and invite yourself. I did it. ;)
I wasn't ever popular in high school but I did have many groups of friends. One thing people appreciate is being noticed, so go to others and act happy to see them. Making them feel noticed will open many doors for friendship. Many of my awkward friends found that after high school, in hindsight they realized they over analyzed things and wish they could go back knowing things were simpler than they presumed. Society at school is not difficult to adapt to if you have better insight to your environment and to what others are thinking. Research what others are into and be on top with the latest fads. Engage in the latest gossip and be yourself. You're 10x Cool. Everyone has their own story, try to learn about the others around you and find common backgrounds or backgrounds that fascinate you. Everyone has gone through something, everyone has their family troubles, everyone has their lifestyle. Be open, talk to people. That's how you ignite friendship. In general, people want to be spoken to and if they're ignored they'll try to find something wrong with you. Like I said, you're 10x Cool. Hope I helped, I have no doubts. You can make it happen.
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You know what I found when making friends. Most of them had classes in common with me and sat near me. Simply talk about assignments with them during class, do that and chances are the conversation will stem off. It may take a while but after a while I'm sure something will blossom.
Hope this helped! I know it can be hard to make friends, I was bullied a lot in Jr. High and the beginning of high school. But I found good friends and we're still friends now that school is over (:
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You can talk to me melissahigdon7@yahoo.com and I'm jelous you take online school I hate school and I don't see my friends here much anyway I suggest getting a job in something you love vollunteering maybe or if you like theatre like me try theatre classes you don't have to go to school for that
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