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"the twins". I want to be an individual
I'm a twin, I'm 15 year old and a girl. My sister and I look a lot alike and our high school is really big so a lot f people can't tell us apart which actually bothers me sometimes when I know it's not their fault. I just wish people knew about how we are different people! How should I handle this situation better??
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Hey! :D I'm a twin to-sixteen year old girl.
I look nothing like my twin though. But I notice you said you look 'alot' alike, which I'm guessing means youre not totally identical. Okay, so what i would do is to reinvent yourself.
You've gone past the cute stage when mums like to dress twins up the same. Now it's time to step out from the crowd.
MAke sure that you at lest have a few friends that your twin isn't friends with. This will help you enter different social circles.Have different intrests and go to different clubs than her.
Personally I wouldn't dress the same, but thats up to you. The main thing is to be happy and healthy in yourself. Don't try to not look like your twin obvoiusly. So if she has blonde hair don't dye yours black-else this could drive you apart in the future. Also don't let what other poeople think about how twins should behave get in the way of you and your goals.
Although you are your own person, seperate completely to your twin, try to embrace being a twin to! Not many people know how special it feels :)
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When I was in the Air Force we had to Officers that were twins. Since on duty it was impossible to tell them apart, as we all dressed a like, had the same haircuts and they were of the same rank, there was no way to tell them apart. Yet when you got to know them off duty and talk with them they were as different as night and day. One day while working, sorry I can't say what we did, I got totally frustrated and shouted out that one of them had to grow a mustache so we could tell them apart on duty. One of them did.
You can't fault people if they cannot tell you apart, especially if like many twins you dress alike. No, one of you can't grow a mustache, as girls though you have far more choices than boy twins do. You can color and style your hair differently. You can wear different styles of clothing. Use make up differently than your one another.
As with the two officers I spoke of; once one of them grew the mustache it became easier for us to work with them and the problems and tensions for us and them were alleviated. The same will happen for you if you both chose to show your individuality through clothing, hairstyle and makeup.
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If most people can't tell you apart it's not their fault. They just aren't trained yet in knowing unless you tell them I'm not so and so. You're close friends must be able to tell but others can't.
If that's the core problem that you look too alike I would change your style of clothes, dye your hair perhaps or cut it differently and let people figure it out on their own.
Aside from that you have to be who you are as an individual and let people see your personality is different than your sister's and that you have different interests. They have to see that for themselves. Perhaps involvement in different clubs, activities and interests at school will show people that the only thing 100% the same is the last name and birthday.
If someone doesn't recognize you by the correct name just laugh it off, correct them and don't let it bother you because every twin must deal with it. You could explain also how to tell the two of you apart. I had martial arts classes with twins and it royally screwed us up because we weren't trained to know the differences. Maybe you could ask your teachers to let you address your home room and tell them how to tell you apart and that it really bugs you.
Apart from that never forget to embrace who you are together and that bond that others don't get to experience between you. It's great to be different and individuals but be sure that you celebrate what makes you the same on your own too.
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