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My dad hates my boyfriend... of 3 years!!
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 4years, im happy and we love each other, the only problem is, my dad doesnt like him. He gets along with my mum & she absolutely loves him! At the start when we first started dating my dad seem to like him until he started judging him on little things. Because he is 3 years older than me, (im 20) he doesnt have a house or nice car or isnt like a man he wishes my boyfriend to be, it really upsets me. My dad never really says anything positive about him until 1 day we almost broke up & I was really upset, he seemed to care then about our relationship? & he went back to normal again... My boy is good to me, he buys me everything, treats me right, knows how to have fun & he may not have the best job in the world but his always willing to work hard. My dad always judges him and he doesnt realise my bf looks up to him becuase he respects him. Its makes me sad becuase it always feels awkward when they are both together (even though they are friendly towrds each other) and knowing the fact that my dad secretly hates him, well I dont know for sure, but its not something I can never ask my dad the truth. I have feeling its becuase he doesnt want me to waste my time (i can do better) and wants me to have a good future and my bf isnt the right one... & he always remindes my sister to find a bf that has a trade or 'good job'(referring to me)??? I have no idea.. please help!
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Sometimes personalities just don't match and there may be a conflict in that way with your boyfriend. Nothing you can do about it, it is what it is.
Otherwise, as long as your boyfriend isn't abusing you, then dad needs to butt the hell out. Don't be concerned with trying to make everybody play nice. Keep things simple and love your boyfriend for who he is and the life you have together and love your parents for what they mean to you. The two don't necessarily have to interact.
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Hi, I understand how you feel. Your dad just wants the best for you. He's just being protective.He wants you to be happy. But see, your boyfriend treats you right and you seem happy with him. That should be the only thing that matters ; is how you feel about him. I know you love your dad with all your heart but he's being judgemental towards your boyfriend. Maybe your dad will see the good in your boyfriend and everything will be ok in the long run, but, he has to let you make decisions on your own sometimes. i hope you can use this advice, i apologize if this cannot help you.
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Hi, I'm old enough to be your grandfather. I hope the wisdom that comes with age and life experience will be helpful to you.
Your father probably won't like what I'm about to say, so it may not be a good idea to throw my words up too him.
A good job is any job that supplies a steady paycheck, that your good at doing and happy to go to work doing everyday. If this describes your boyfriends job then he has a good job. Not all jobs are skilled labor jobs. We need unskilled labor just as much as skilled labor. We need the bus drivers, sanitation workers and other jobs likes these just as much as the electricians and plumbers.
Is your boyfriend is good to you? Is he is the type of man who will come home to each day after work and not go catting around in bars? He would love you and not hit you? Then he is a good man.
Money does not buy happiness; in general all the money in the world would only buy bigger problems. As long as the two of you resolve to live with in your means you can be happy.
Speaking as a husband and father we would love to see our daughters marry that fairytale prince. Not many can have the fairytale. The best we can hope for is the man she chooses will love, honor and respect her for who she is. Mostly that she is my daughter and I give him to her to protect and cherish, to keep safe from harm and not to harm her. If he can do all that then he is her prince charming and all I can really hope for.
Yea, I know a little mushy right. But that is how fathers think about their daughters, not so their sons. They expect their sons to take care of themselves. But even in this day and age with women very capable of caring for themselves a daughter is and always will be daddy's little girl.
If your boyfriend is everything I would like to see for my daughter, then you need to find away to tell your father. All he really wants is what is best for you. Frankly in most fathers minds no man is ever good enough for their daughters.
Just remember one thing when talking to dad. Moms father probably felt the same way about him as he feels about your boyfriend. You grew up and, lived with the improving version of dad, not the original version that grandad saw.
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My Parents are the same! It's all about finding someone with a great paying job that has an education. Someone that can support you.
Honestly, If you love this kid,. Then you should be with him. Money is not everything! A Job is not everything! You didn't fall in love because he had a good job or a great car. You love him for who he is.
Maybe you should sit down with your dad and talk about this to him,. Explain that you really like this kid, and he makes you happy. Money is not everything in the world. And by the sounds of it. this person has done nothing but love you back.
Maybe once you have talked to your dad about how you feel he might lighten up a bit.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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I don't believe your dad hates your boyfriend. I believe he LOVES you... so much that there will never be anybody good enough for his little girl. If this relationship is the real thing, and long term, perhaps it is time for your boyfriend to sit down alone with your dad and have a heart to heart talk. He needs to explain to him that it seems like he (your dad) doesn't really like him. He needs to tell him he understands that he is protective of his little girl, but that he (boyfriend) loves you, respects you, and wants to be there for you. He needs to tell your dad what his intentions toward you are. Believe me, a one on one chat will do a lot to improving your dad's opinion of him. That takes a lot of guts and proves that he is serious, and also respects your family. Any father would be impressed by that. If your boyfriend refuses to do something like that, I would question that, and maybe dad isn't so far off in his opinion. But, if you love each other as much as you say, I think your boyfriend would be willing to do anything to make you happy and make things easier for the both of you and your family situation. Good luck.
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