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Son getting threats at home
Please, help me! My 16 boy is very thin. He had a few friends and they were not good for him. Anyway, I thought he'd see it in time. Well, one of them came and fought him at my house and one videoed it. It got online and the teasing got worse. My son said if I do something it will get worse. Fast forward to today, my son has these boys picking on him at school and coming to my house in a group to fight. Luckily, he wasn't home but the boys saw me and told me they wanted to chill with him. HELP I want to beat the shit out of all of them.
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Hi, I'm probably old enough to be your father. Hopefully the wisdom of my age will be helpful to you.
Zane has given you some excellent advice. Bullying has become a major topic both in and out of school. One that both school officials and law enforcement are working on correcting and preventing.
Before going to the school principal and law enforcement download the video before it can be destroyed by the bullies. Then make copies of it and take it to the school Principal and leave a copy with him.
Where I live all Middle and High Schools have a Resource Officer; a County Police Officer who Patrols the Schools during the day. The Officers job is multi-faceted in that the Officer is there to keep order and to hopefully prevent trouble before it starts. If your school has a Law Enforcement Resource Officer ask that the Officer sit in on your meeting with the Principal. Also have a copy of the video available to leave with the Officer.
If the Officer ask you to sign a complaint, do so. Your job is to watch out for the well being of your child. Let their parents worry about their children.
I was in a similar position when my son decided to take an elective class in auto motive repair. This class required him to leave his home school for the central vo-tech school. Had I known this class was populated by all the bad apples from the disciplinary school next to it, I would not have allowed my son to take the class.
I had to press charges against a student, who told me "go head, I'll be home before the paperwork is done." Unfortunately for him I was and am very politically active and made sure he was remanded to the juvenile center." It was very satisfying to see him in tears as he was lead away in handcuffs.
I tell you this as you are your sons advocate. You must fight for him. Bullies understand two things; their power lies in their pack and most people will not challenge that power. When challenged the consequences have to be severe enough to make them back down. Your job is to not only challenge the bully but to ensure the Juvenile Justice System works for you in that it seeks to punish while seeking to change the behavior of the bully.
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Go to the police, Tell them the situation and what is going on.
Let the school know your son is being bullied, As much as your son insist the situation would get worse it's a hell of a lot better to let people be aware of the situation then to not say a word to anyone. You got proof, Bring it too the police. Tell them you fear for your sons safety. In the meantime don't allow your son to walk alone, Make sure he is with a group of friends or have someone with him. Next time they step foot on the property tell them to leave or you will call the police and if they don't then pick up the phone and call them.
There IS a good chance the cops will do little action but another thought...Have your son take some self defense classes.
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As a mother myself, I understand where you are coming from. This type of behavior is not only unacceptable, but it is also illegal. The first thing I would suggest is to go to the school and speak to the principle about how they deal with hazing and bullying. The principle needs to be aware of this and most likely the police will be involved. The difficult part about this is the possibility of retaliation from other peers at school, however someone needs to be notified. Chances are there are other kids in his school that they are bullying as well, by taking a stance there is a better chance of getting this issue resolved and could possibly prevent a more severe crime from happening. If the harassment continues, call 911 and file charges against them. Your son may also need counciling or may need to be placed in another school, which could be difficult this late in the school year, but with a situation as you described, they may be able to work something out. Another option is having him homeschooled for a time. There is a great program that is a virtual school and many states do have programs for high schoolers called Connections Academy. Here is the link [Link](Mouse over link to see full location). You will need to click on the link for your state to see for sure if this would be an option for you.
There is no cost unless you are out of the United States. I am also including a couple of links that may be helpful in understanding bullying and may be able to help you with more resources in your area.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Please note that I am not an affiliate to any of these links, nor am I getting paid to supply them. I hope this information will be helpful to you and your son.
But i do feel that the first step would be to contact the school and then the police department. It may also be a good idea to make arragements for him to go to a relatives house after school or an after school activity that will get him involved with other kids while allowing him to escape the confrontation without losing face to his peers. Also do some research on different sites and maybe join a few forums that will allow you to gain the supportand possibly some more advice from other parents who are dealing with the same issue. I wish you and your son the best of luck. He's a lucky young man to have a mama who cares so much :)
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