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husband "bear hugs" female co-worker
Just got married not to long ago (3 months ago) anyway my family and I went to our city's local fair and husband ran into his co-worker not a big deal she was at my wedding but when she practically jumped in his arms and he gave her a huge hug I got concerned. Why??? Well because he went out of town for 3 days for work and when he got back I got a "hello babe" and a peck on the lips. okay I didnt think much of it til he gave this woman that kind of hug. Then I started thinking "IM your WIFE" and I get a peck this woman gets a bear hug that I love to get from you.. When she first seen him I thought it was someone he hasnt seen in awhile the way she screamed and ran up and hugged him, when I seen who it was I thought dang you just seen him at work.. He knew it bothered me he could tell by my face.. couple days later he brought it up and I told him yeah I was concerned I even told him it wasnt about the hug it was about the way it was. He told me not to worry and went on his way. Should I be worried and should I persue this more to him. Or just leave well enough alone??
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It's wonderful ,wearing my wedding dress during my wedding that can be a perfect day.
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Leave the hug alone. I doubt it was really the problem.
The problem is that everyone, ever friend, ever relationship, ever family member, will work in a slightly different way then every other one.
Is there something about the way your relationship with your husband works that you'd like to see change?
It's understandable for it to be a bit galling when you see someone you are very intimate with, share a moment of closeness with someone else. However, you also have to acknowledge that people have closeness with others, and different ways to express it then they might express it with you. That needs to be okay.
If you are feeling an actually lack of closeness between you and your husband - talk to him about that. Maybe with ideas of how to address it, like regular date nights or even movie nights.
It's okay to feel a bit put out sometimes, but you also have to be able to put that feeling in it's place: It's not about her, or the hug. It's about creating the kind of relationship that makes both of you feel taken care of and maintains your special intimacy.
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Your gut is telling you something is wrong. Its not just based on what happened with the woman and the hug, but also what's happening (or not happening) at home. Do some more investigating before you bring it up again. If you find more things that make you suspicious, talk to him about it. If he denies it, suggest you both go get counseling together so you can get to the bottom of why you don't trust him. And trust your instincts! You're not a bitch for being a little weirded out by this, you're just a concerned wife.
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