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Is this cheating?
My boyfriend and I were going through a rough period. He started talking to my best friend on msn and they had a very very flirtatious conversation including them discussing having sex, him telling her her naked body would turn him on, her dancing naked would be hot etc. He asked her intimate and leading questions. He hid this from me and she told me, I confronted him and he'd deleted the chat log, but I made him recover it and it's disgusting. Is this cheating?
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Yes, it's cheating. It's emotional cheating and it's no less destructive than cheating physically.
You've received some great advice already and I concur.
This is where you put on your big girl panties, learn what self-respect, honor, dignity, and loyalty are all about, and learn to set appropriate boundaries for all involved.
Your boyfriend should be told that he crossed three boundaries that you cannot accept. One... he betrayed you and two... he betrayed you with your friend. The third was lying (omissions of the truth - lying) and trying to cover his tracks.
Tell him you're sorry but you can't accept that in a boyfriend. And end it.
Your friend is even worse because men may come and go but friends should always be there. This girl doesn't value your friendship, doesn't respect you, has no boundaries, no self-respect, and no loyalty. Tell her that. And end it with her.
In the future, pick your friends very carefully. The ones worth keeping are sometimes few and far between. But real friends understand that your man is off limits to her at all times.
This is a hard lesson to learn and one you won't forget but in the lesson you should come out on the other side knowing what a friend isn't...and making sure that you yourself never cross that line with someone and making sure that your friends understand that any failure on their part regarding loyalty to your friendship will result in a termination of your trust & companionship.
Best of luck to you,
Jada
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well, yeah of course it is. Not physically, but if he was there with her think would he have actually acted on his words. You can mentally cheat and hurt people too. This guy is not to be trusted, love. You need to think about what could happen later on in life, the next time you are going through a rough patch what will happen then? I'm all for second chances but he even hid it from you. If it weren't for your friend telling you would he have made it into an affair? trust me you wouldn't want to grow old, or have kids someday with a guy who cheats at every chance, just because your relationships a bit rocky. He'd keep it from you and hurt you even more. Uslally I would say give him another chance, but because he didn't come to you straight away it seems like he's the guy to cheat again. Its your choice but if it urt you so much this time, think about how it could destroy you next time. x Good luck.
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Well , Thatss Not A Real Friend && A Real Boyfriend. Yess In My Reaalationshipss I Would Call That Cheatinq DUMP Bothh Off Themm. YUUll Find Better.
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Imagine a real-life setting.
You two have an argument and go to separate sides of a room.
Your best friend walks in and starts talking to you boyfriend. Harmless.
Then, they start to discuss sex. He starts to say how if she took off her clothes that he'd get really turned on. She flirts back and discusses having sex with him, too. They are enthralled in the heated conversation. You can physically see them both getting excited over it.
She leaves the room and you approach him about this because it concerns you.
He says, "Oh, I forgot all about that conversation. It was nothing."
It isn't acceptable.
Dump your boyfriend. End it now. Save yourself.
Dump your friend. End it now. They're a piece of crap friend.
You can do better. You deserve to be treated with respect.
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Look, many people give advice on topics like this. The bottom line is “Does it bother you? Make you mad? Make you feel less wanted?” if your answer is “yes”, “yes” and “yes”. Then It doesn’t really matter whether it’s within the category of cheating or not. The point is, he’s knowingly doing something that would obviously hurt and upset you. Your man is sure having a good time at your expense. Here's the commonsense question: Do you want to be with someone that does that to you? (cool, you
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Yes, this is cheating.
Innocent flirting can be okay but this was not only intimate and sexual but with your best friend. He crossed the line and actually, so did she. What was she doing flirting with your boyfriend in the first place? She should have ended the conversation as soon as it started to get inappropriate.
The fact of the matter is, if he's having those kind of conversations with your best friend, who else is he talking to? Regardless of whether you were going through a rough patch, it's wrong of him to talk to other girls like that.
I suggest you have a think about whether or not you want to be with someone like that. Even if he truly is sorry, you have probably lost trust in him and trust is one of the most important things in any good relationship. If you can't trust him, you may as well give up now.
You may also want to have a word with your best friend. She shouldn't have been having a 'very very flirtacious' conversation with her friend's boyfriend. It might be time to reevaluate your relationship with her as well as the one with your boyfriend.
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Dear "Is this cheating?"
Personally, it doesn't matter if it's cheating or not. He's a complete douche bag. Dump his sorry bum right now... Not even kidding. If he doesn't respect you enough (just as a person) to talk to your BEST FRIEND like that, well, then it doesn't matter if you were in a rough patch or not. He pulled a dick move and you don't want someone like that. Do yourself a favor, you can find so much better in a boyfriend. And you might want to consider a new best friend... they sound just about perfect for eachother. A skank and a douche. I'm so sorry that happened to you :(
Goodluck!
xoxo
LoLLiPoP
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