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Do I make a move on him?
There is a guy down the street, he is over 20 years older than me. I am 16. He is really good looking, funny, cool, calm, and collective. We have the same interests (movies, motorcycles, cars). He sits next to me sometimes at parties. We have had conversations about stuff like Cialis (ED medication, we were joking about it), and once Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe came on and we joked about the subliminal messaging in that title ;). I took his chair once when he went to the bathroom, and when he came back he laughed and totally pretended to sit on me and put his butt all in my face. I laughed back. Everytime he walks his dog, I go outside for some reason, and he talks to me. Once, I had texted him and he never responded. I went outside the same day, and he cut his walk short (he always walks to the same spot, this time he stopped and turned around waaaay before that) and he came and talked to me. He said he got my text and answered my question about motorcycles, then we talked about age and how I was sick of being young because I needed a parent signature on EVERYTHING. He said the government was just protecting me from myself. I laughed. I have a friend who is helping try and get more friendly with him. Me and her are planning on inviting him over tonight to help us looking for bikes online since he knows more about them than we do. I hope we can be flirty. Can you give me some advice? I want to be able to be flirty with him and be on a more than friend, summer fling, level. I know the age difference is illegal and bad, but I'm not talking about sex or anything. A kiss would be nice. Can you help me? He is single and lives alone, two doors down on my street.
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I think maybe gettin close to someone as old as that is not a smart idea.Its very common though. A kiss leads to something else. He could end up in jail if someone was to find out. so i think you should stay on just the friendly level wait two years and it will be totally legal. so if you can wait. if he likes you he'll wait too
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I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
You are talking about flirting with someone 20+ years your senior. Let’s assume for a minute that he realizes that all you are doing is flirting. The mere fact that he is associating with you on that level can get him into very serious trouble with the legal system. It doesn’t have to be you or your parents who report him. I am again going to assume your parents are not going to be home when you invite him over. A neighbor knowing your parents are not home could think this very strange and call the police. You want to have what you belief is innocent fun for you and your friend. This so called innocent fun could land this man in jail, for what; mostly for being stupid enough to play your silly game.
There is a flip side to this scenario; What if this single guy is actually a sexual predator, a registered sex offender. Have you ever thought about that? Each state has a list of sexual predators accessible through the internet. It might be wise to check this list to see who in your neighborhood is on this list. I am not saying this guy is on the list but his actions with you do fit those of a child sexual predator.
It is okay for a child to have adult friends. It is just in this day and age one has to very careful in picking those friends and know just who and what they are. By law sexual predators must register with local law enforcement. Unfortunately not every state requires that law enforcement notify the neighborhood that a predator resides among them.
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If I am reading this correctly it says the man is 20+ years older than you and you want to kiss him. Are you trying to get the man put in jail???? No bueno! I can understand you being a attracted to the man, I almost started dating a guy who was 10 years older then me, I was 20, he was 30... and let me tell you, he was nice and all, but at the end of the day, us younger girls have a WHOLE LOT more living to do while they are settling in their lives that they have. You can't teach a old dog new tricks and it won't be long before they tell you what you can and can't do and try to be extra controlling. Whatever you decide to do, I hope you just think it through logically and be super careful....
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The best advice anyone could give you is to just be yourself. Think about it, it has got you this far. From reading your question, it seems to me that he is either avoiding you because he likes you and he doesn’t know what to do. Either because of the age difference or maybe he just isn't that good with showing his feelings. Or maybe he is avoiding you because he likes you but he doesn’t want a romantic relationship. Before you start really flirting him, just flirt a little and see if he flirts back, if he dose than he probably likes you. If he doesn’t he might just want to be friends. If he does flirt back than just go with, flirt your way, it is unique and it is a good way to show him who you are, and what you have to offer. Hope I helped.
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Depending on where you live, even a kiss could be illegal.
Also, at least consider this:
Would a good, sensible, responsible and respectful man of his age, kiss a sixteen year old?
You might be the best, sexiest, smartest sixteen year old in existence, but do you think a grown man who would kiss you is a nice respectful person? Do you think a grown man who would make the decision to kiss you, not be hoping for, or expecting, more than that kiss?
I'm twenty five. I've dated men a decade older then me, sometimes more. I understand the attraction to older men. But I also know that very few older men of that age desire 'just a kiss'. I also know that many, many older men who are willing to go after MUCH younger women, are actually not as nice as they first seem. The nice ones take a good deal of convincing.
Go ahead and flirt with him. It's fine practice and it might be fun. Go ahead and fantasize, that's normal and healthy. But please, don't kiss him, don't touch him, don't take it any further than fluttering your eye lashes.
If you do, he will either be a good man who kindly and gently rejects you or he will be a bad, irresponsible man, who fails to realize that just because you can look like and act like a women, doesn't mean you are ready to relate to him as an adult woman.
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