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Trust issues.
I seriously need some help.
Ok, so 2 weeks ago... at the start of the school holidays, my boyfriend and I attended this party, everyone was piss wasted, and I was so out of it...
I don't remember a lot, but...
My boyfriend told me to make out with this really hot chick, so I did... Then this random dude was like, ALL over me... and He was kissing me and feeling me and shit.
And... my boyfriend saw and he was being all emo the rest of the night, I tried to make it up to him, but he wouldn't talk to me, like at all.
The next morning, I went to another state and went to another suburb... (like for the holidays)
I haven't seen him in two weeks, and just recently he's been talking to me online, asking me "if this is really working" and "if you wana break up, just say so."
-Does that mean he want's to breakup with me, but he doesn't want to do it? Like he wants me to dump him?
He says he doesn't trust me.
What can I do to gain his trust?
Probably nothing huh?
I just, hate this!
He makes me feel so shit about myself, all the
time. Like even before all this shit happened...
If he only know how much he was hurting me.
What should I do?
P L E A S E !
I'm so desperate.
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I'm going to jump on the break up train.
You got drunk and made out with a chick because he told you to (Stupid)
Then you went and were all over some other guy, or he was all over you (Stupid)
And now you're both emotionally broken because you got drunk and both did stupid shit, and the relationship is fucked. Neither of you is mature enough to handle relationships. Drop him and take some time off to learn self control.
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If your boyfriend makes you feel like shit, then you shouldn't be together. No one should feel shitty in their own relationship.
Break it off.
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You're both idiots.
You belong together or extremely far apart. Certainly keep out of reach of children.
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first of all i want to say im sorry your going through this. second i think he should have prevented this from happening ..in other words i hold him more responsible for this situation than you. 1. He should have never let you get so wasted like that 2. he should have never asked you to make out with another girl 3. He should have stepped up and be a man and ..no offense mark his territory and told the other dude to back off. 4. accept he has a lot of fault for what happened. if i may allow me to expaine each point.
1. he really should worry alot more about your well being theres nothing wrong with having a great time and enjoying the night BUT as your boyfriend he really should have talked to you and reminded you that hey we need to stay sane and not go insane here thats how girls end up getting raped or even killed.
2.He should have asked to do this inprivate yeah it may have turned him one but guess what it also apparently turned on a bunch of other guys too so know hes got one choice if hes out numbered ..Share which i dont think he enjoyed it.
3.If he was willing to let you be a turn on for the rest of the folk there he should have accepted that there were going to be uninvited guests and if he didnt like the idea of sharing then he should have brought back up or just not done a free for all. if he wasnt able or willing to defend you then he shouldnt have put you in that situation.
4. He should accept his error he screwed up. If he did not like the idea of other guys kissing and fonding you he should have done a private party ( you the other gal and him) but because he knows he messed up and set himself up for this he is now trying to blame you and use you as the scape goat whichis not cool. My thought is find someone you see that you cant live without not with...he obviously doesnt see you with respect instead he now sees you low for letting yourself do that which equals to him seeing you as something he can live with but not without which i think means he doesnt want you anymore. I msorry if i have offended you but i really think you should not be with someone whos makes you feel bad.. i think that the person you are with should always try to lift up your spirit, cheer you up and on, and bring out he positive feeling and qualities from with in you not obress them or put you down thats not love that thinking your feces dont stink which by that way everyones does so he aint perfect. I hope you can be strong and let him go. I know youll learn from this a valuable lesson one which i am no one to lecture you about but one that im sure you will learn from. I hope this helps if it doesnt let me know
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Ok. Honey. Look at your last paragraph: "He makes me feel so shit about myself, all the time. Like even before all this shit happened." Are you sure it is a good idea to try to get him back? It could be different if this was a one time thing, and maybe the two of you were just having an issue right now. But it seems that this is the general pattern of this relationship, at least as far as the feelings go.
I don't know what he means when he says all those things to you. Maybe he thinks you want to break up with him and he wants you to just do it and get it over with. He sounds frustrated, but I am not so sure in what this stems from.
When the guy at the party was "all over you" were you all over him in return or were you really out of it? Because if you weren't even reciprocating his actions, your boyfriend shouldn't really be mad at you.
I would suggest drinking less at these parties. You know all the reasons people tell you, but in addition to that, you don't want to do something that you might regret. You don't want to be with another guy and have your boyfriend see and be upset about it. Stay in a mental state that will allow you to make clear judgments and be able to stop someone from doing something to you that isn't in your best interests.
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