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manilipation by my wife
my wife pressured me into a big mortage and many other fininical areas.I know it was my fault for saying yes, but i could not handle the rentless pressure.Now i have lost almost evreything i had even my will to succede.I love her but not in love.i feel she has taken advantage of my heart.now she is trying to fix it but i dont want her to. I am lost in life what should i do
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I think that people define being in love as that romantic passion feeling they get usually the first few months of the relationship. I read in a article that we actually produce some sort of hormone that helps to create that feeling, you know the no need of sleep or food, the person is perfect no matter what they do kind of thing......eventually that feeling fades and thats when we have to commit to loving the person we are with anyway, for real. For me to love is a choice, a decision we make. When we choose to love we decide to look at the other person in a positive light and we back up those thoughts with positive actions. To love someone is to always want the best for them, to protect them, to put there needs before your own. Kind of like deciding to be selfless. As soon as we decide to be selfish, That is when we choose not to love and problems begin to appear.
I think when people say they left the marriage because they fell out of love.It is just another excuse.
Sometimes we may get into a place in which we are having difficulties seeing the positive in the other and we may not feel so loving towards them, that is when we have to dig down deep inside ourselves, stay committed, do some self inventory, and re-commit to the relationship. I think if you once loved someone in the way you needed to in order decide to marry them, those feelings can always be re-established as long as you both commit to do so. Its always a choice. i recommend a marriage counselor. God Bless!
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I don't get why you don't want her to fix it. She's your wife she loves you. Your not in love with her? Were you ever in love with her? If you were at one point you can be again. She made a mistake and you let it happen if you want a great relationship with your wife you need to speak up. You should have let her know that you weren't comfortable with it. Your just confused right now give her a chance to make up for it. Here's one of my favorite website's [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Read some of the articles when you can. And good luck
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i am only 15, but what i would do is this...go to counseling and tell your spouse how you feel
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GO TO COUNSELING.
Now. No more trying to work it out just the two of you, obviously that hasn't worked for you in the past. Get some outside help, both with your marriage and with your finances.
Also, stop blaming her. It's not solving any of your problems, it's just creating new ones. No one can manipulate you without your permission. Whatever you two did, you did it togeather, and you now in the exact same mess, togeather.
Get both of your sorry butts into marriage counseling, and get some credit counseling while you are at it. You need professional help with your difficulties at this poin.
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yeah, you two should sit down. try and work things out with the mortage company and all other areas you're having problems with. ask your wife to help out! you live together, she should help support the household if youre in trouble.
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If you don't want to work things out with her..then i think you should sit her down and explain to her that you love her but you have slowly fallen out of love with her. Explain what has caused you to drift away from her and try to resolve the problem by coming up with ways to solve it. Best of luck :] Feel free to ask if you have any more questions
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