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Hes 45, married, with kids!! And Im 18!!
Okay, so theres this guy and his name is Dan. Hes 45 years old, married, with kids, and I went to canobie with him, my uncle, and my cousins. And the only reason I was there was because one of my cousins is autistic and I was going to help. So right when I get there Dan comes up and puts his arm around me and just starts walking with me, and I was like what the heck? But I didnt say anything cause Im too shy. (Im 18 by the way) and we get to the first ride were going to go on and everyone kinda split up and went there own way and I was trying to figure out who to sit next to when he whispers in my ear, sit next to me in the back, and ofcourse, I was like uhm okay, even though I felt weird about that. But I did and it was fine, until I got off and he had his arm around my shoulder again. Anyways later when I was there this guy I knew and was just friends with came over and gave me a hug and I hugged him back and Dan came over and was like okay thats enough and then practically dragged me away from him. I found that soo rude but I didnt say anything. And towards the end of the day we were talking about who was easier to read, guys or girls, and this girl standing next to me was like oh is he your dad and I immediately said ha, no! And then I thought she would think I was weird so I was going to explain that he was one of my moms old friends but he interupted me and I was like Im a....friend. And I was just like oh yeah, hes a friend. But hes not my friend. Hes my moms friend. And I caught him staring at me a few times too, which made me feel so self concious so we went to his car because some of the others wanted food and water and stuff and I was looking in the reflection trying to make myself look better when Dan was like relax you look great. So I kinda blushed and was oh thanks. So anyways that was Canobie. Then like three days later my cell phone rings right and it was him. It was a text message that said pg. And I wrote back and was like what does that mean. And he called me back and said that it was a mistake and that somehow his locked phone, unlocked itself in his pocket and sent me a text. And I believed him until I talked to one of my best friends and she was like no, hes lying and now I believe her instead. And I already told her all this stuff and she thinks that he likes me, but I really dont know. Can someone please tell me what they think? Thank you soo much, and sorry about the length!
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Hi,
I personally think that he has a problem and you should stay away from him. Besides the fact that he's married, he has totally disrespected you and your familiy's trust. I think he's too old for you. Things that you are experiencing now, he has already been through; decades ago!
He had no right to get in the middle of your conversations, and saying that you looked great was inappropriate.
He sounds like he has some kind of wierd crush on you and it's just not right. I would keep my didstnce from him and I would also tell your parents about it considering that he's their friend. I don't think they would appreciate it either. Be careful.
Good luck,
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That there is what we of the random internet community call "legal pedo"
A guy who gets off on younger girls and chases them, hoping his "ohhh hes so old and experienced how could he be interested in me?!" gets him a score with younger girls.
Stay away. He's sexually interested in you is just being too subtle about it. Whats even creepier is the evidence of jealousy and possessiveness he showed when you were talking with a guy who was your friend. He was basically fighting off a potential rival.
Hes smart. He was very subtle and ambiguous to start off with, giving you signs that you could give him the benefit of the doubt on. Guys who do what he was doing will do this, giving you enough of an action that they can gauge your reaction to it without being overtly creepy. That, to me, says you arent the first 18 year old he's tried to seduce and he's probably succeded at least once in the past.
Block his phone, tell him not to text you, and if he continues mention it to your father and be honest about how it made you feel. You should be creeped out, if this kind of thing doesnt set off danger signs, make not of it so that those danger signs send off warning bells in your head in the future.
::Edit::
For your own personal peace of mind, I've known guys like this, and read stories, and heard stories.
He strikes me as relatively harmless, as far as it goes. He's got a wife and kids, and isnt looking to mess that up. As such, from his behaviour, hes looking to seduce rather than "conquer" and wants his young ladies to come fully willing. He wants to be the hot older guy who can still score with younger chicks, its alot about vanity. So if you tell him to stay away and make it clear that you won't tolerate him making passes at you, he'll probably leave you alone altogether when he finds out you dont want to be a pretty young thing wowed by whatever he thinks he has to offer.
Other guys can be far creepier and possibly dangerous. Men who go after much younger women usually have one or both of two motivations.
- They want sexual gratification because physically having sex with a young woman turns them on
- They want emotional gratification because being able to attract a younger woman feeds their pride and ego, and makes them feel like verile young studs.
People who are motivated by the first and only the first... well just go look up the definition of Pedophile somewhere. You'll get the idea.
People who are motivated by the second are the kind who sometimes divorce their wives and get a new, early 20s or younger trophy wife.
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Play it safe and stay away from him.
Your first instincts seemed to be telling
you this wasn't right. Trust those instincts.
Always. They are rarely wrong. :)
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ewww thats SO creepy. i would be freaking out if i were you and an old guy was trying to flirt with me. if it's making you uncomfortable, tell your mom and maybe she can tell him to stop or if it gets really bad not have any contact with him anymroe because it looks like it's leading to rape. for now if you dont want to cause any serious trouble and dont feel like telling your mom just stay away from him as much as you can and ignore him and just try to lose all contact with him. you can tell your mom if you want too though it's your choice. try really hard NEVER to be alone with him if you even have to be with him at all .if you ever end up alone then defend yourself DON'T let him rape you because this is obviously leading to a rape. my point is just be careful, try to stay away from him, and tel your mom if you want or if it gets really bad to the point where he won't leave you alone. don't let yourself think its okay that he's flirting with you because it's NOT okay if he's 45, married, and with kids eww that is just downright creepy and weird of him. DO NOT LET YOURSELF GET RAPED please try never to be alone with him and do NOT trust him.
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I think that he might not really like you. I know it seems like all the signs are there but maybe he just wanted to hang out with you cuz he wanted to get to know you better. After all he is your mom's friend. I also know this older guy who a while back when we were away on vacation, was acting kind of weird and it made me kind of uncomfortable, but then over time I realized that I had completely made a bigger deal of it than it really was, and that he just wanted to be friends. But then again he could think that you are pretty and be going through a mid life criss where he wishes he were younger. Also the cell phone thing is completely believable, so I wouldn't really make too much of that. Just in case though, just keep your guard up when you are around him for a while until you don't feel uncomfortable with him anymore. I hope that I helped you.
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