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Oh great.
So it seems like latley, instead of worrying about school ( which i am.) I'm worrying about my Ex-BFF.
We drifted apart this summer.
Like; No talking at ALL- which i really dont know what happened..
Maggie (exbff) and me alllways hung out. We were such good friends. Lets say we werrre attached by the shoulders.
But, this summer; I kind of got fed up with her. How much she changed. I can't stand it, I meen I see her on myspace and I hear about her from my other bestfriend ( who hangs out with maggie more then I do. ALOT MORE) and I get ... annoyed? In a way I want to be still friends with her, but then I see her and I'm like " UGH!" . I dont know it's so confusing! And now that school is going to start, I really dont know what to do. I'm mad because we drifted apart, and I'm mad at her for that. I meen she goes across the street to my other friends house, and never comes and sees what I'm up to?
okay so, yeah I dont know exactly what I'm feeling- that's where the confusing part comes in.
But I need help with how to deal with it in school. How much shes changed with her new "bff" and how to show her that I've been GREAT without her, instead of talking about the stupid Old times. you know what I meen? even though I have been great.
But Not seeing her this summer took a whole load off; lets just say I was STRESS FREE! ahha.
So yeah- things do happen for a reason; I became much better friends with my other friends who I hang out with mostly everyday..
Now to deal with it in school 24/7; help?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Holy motherfreaking crap, this is EXACTLY the same situation I'm in! Pretty much word-for-word!
My best friend and I used to be so close, and this summer we never talked... she even forgot my birthday... she changed a lot. Now she hangs out with my other best friend, who tells me stuff about what she's been up to.
I felt stress free too! And now I've found better friends.
Okay, so here's what I've been doing with my situation lately. I've convinced myself this year that I really want to get good grades and not stress about my exbff. So, I'm trying to spend more time with my other friends and just realize that she and I drifted apart and that she is not putting any effort into our friendship. So far it's been great. She hangs out with her friends, and I hang out with mine. She has changed so much that it's not good for me to be around her, honestly. She's become a bad influence.
This school year I have pretty much every single class with her and my other best friend who she hangs out with all the time. I'm going to be nice to her, but that doesn't mean we have to hang out after school. I'm still going to have conversations with her about what I did over the weekend, but my weekends will not include hanging out with or thinking about her. Also, she has definitely realized that I have better friends because I am with them pretty much all the time. She knows that I'm upset with her... and that things have changed. She and her new best friend are so weird to be around now... so I just concentrate on school and my other friends.
All the crap she's done to me in the past... best friends don't do that to each other. So obviously we were probably never best friends and I shouldn't feel obligated to put up with her anymore.
I really hope I've helped you a little bit. Honestly, I'm still confused about my situation too, so please let me know how your situation works out! I would really appreciate it.
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As you get older, you're definitely going to find out that people change and they're not what they seem.. and it's tough especially when it's your BFF. It'll probably be awkward in school for awhile, but you're going to have to learn to deal with it. No one is forcing you to be best friends with her again, you don't even have to like her, but be kind to her. Keep doing what you're doing now. Make plans with alll your other friends and keep busy! and definitely try your hardest to make new friends this year, because you never know, you may just find your next BFF!
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Honestly you know where you stand. You said yourself you can't stand how she changed for the worse and that bothers you. Not only does she not seem to care about you right now but she seems to think that if she becomes a different person she'll have a better life. And really how much does that make sense? Not a lot.
When it comes down to it, all she really wants is attention. She's being selfish and not caring about anyone else. Is this truly a person you want as a friend? She definitely won't benefit you in any way by acting like this.
Your life is stress free and you seem to have friends who are right for you. You really don't need her. It's hard to lose a friendship especially when you were close. But even if you don't realize it now, you'll find out later on that everyone you met in your life makes you learn something new. You know what to look for in friendship. If people don't possess any of those qualities that you look for they aren't worth your time.
When you see her at school try not to make it seem like a big deal. Don't be rude to her, just keep casual. Always make yourself look approachable because then if she has anything to discuss with you, she'll feel like she can without it being awkward. I would focus not so much on her but on you and your new friends. Get to know some people that you haven't spoken to in awhile. Get involved in activites or do things that you always wanted to do. If you can keep busy and fullfill things you want to do then you'll have a happy life. Learn from her but don't dwell on the memories. Remember, it's a new year of school and things will change. Live in the present, not the past.
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Forget about her. Thats how my old friend and I was. I mean we are still friends but we are not as close as we use to be. The only way to show her that you have been great is to find new people. It will show if you are happy with them. She will notice. People change, there isn't much you can do about that. Another thing to do is to talk to her about it. Maybe she will see what is going on. She may not realize it because she found another friend which is not bad at all. But she could be excited about that and so caught up in what they do. But if things don't work out try not to start fighting. Maybe just say hi walking by her. But try to make some new friends. Don't hold a grudge either. I've been through that and you don't want to be there. So don't be mean about it just work it out and if not just be friends. And find some new friends. Good luck!
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