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i never tried this ask a random columnist thing before but oh well. Im 15 years old, female, from a small small town and like every teenager i have issues. sometimes i just feel so alone and i have friends and they are the best and i have family who are great as well but still i cant help but feel alones sometimes, also i cant help but feel like im not doing what im supposed to be doing like somehow im living a different life than what i was supposed to. i just need someone to talk to and maybe someone who can relate you dont need to answer this but u if do thats great too
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oh im sorry i didnt respond before.. i just hadnt signed on in a while.
but im so shocked because i feel the same way..
to me its like a feeling where you can be surrounded by the most amazing friends, but when you're alone for just a second, its a feeling that you've been alone for years...
sometimes i just get sad because it feels like you're in a world that sometimes people dont understand how you feel.. its a feeling of loneliness that wont go away...
im not really giving you advice and im sorry.. its just so surprising to me that someones asking me... lol.. wen im like in a similar situation, i just never really knew how to explain it all. you put it in like the right words...
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hey.
well im pretty sure and i can definately relate to how your feeling.
things will come around for you tho promise!
if you do have all these people who are great and love you try and keep them closer talk 2 them spend some time with them,loneliness will come at times its normal to feel like you don't belong but dont allow these moments to come over everything. be patient and im sure you'll find some way to find yourself and a better life although its not always bad to live a life completely different from what everyone expects, its what makes you unique and your own person; you juss need to find a way to make how you live your life be the way you want it to go.
i can tell you this because this is exactly how i would feel back when i was a lil younger. I felt like i was doing everything wrong and nothing good was ever going to come my way and i thought my life was just going to stay the same forever and i got real lonely almost about to comitt suicide but i started thinking that i had a whole other part of life ahead of me and i didint know what was going to happen next so i stuck around and now i feel like im such a happy person and i have everything i need to have and yeah life gets hard and it takes time to make it right but the time will come just wait it out.
if you'd like to talk through some other way i have yahoo my sreename: dulce_niina
or my myspace : abelsandoval@sbcglobal.net
->i may not have the best advice ever but ill always listen :]
goodluck <3
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It sucks to not know if you are going down the right path. You very well might not be going down the right path and you may need to reevaluate your life and figure out what you want for your life. Find something you are passionate about and do it.
I have felt that loneliness this past couple months also. I don't have great friends like you do though, but I think you feel like you want or need more and that definetly could be what you have to figure out.
Try meditating and asking yourself the questions you want answered.
I hope I helped.
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I felt exactly like you at your age. I had a great life but somehow did not feel very satisfied by it. I wanted it to have more variety and purpose. My solution was to escape to South America for six months. That's a little radical, but I did it in a completely legal way that didn't interfere with my school at all, and I'm extremely pleased I did it. I went from a pre-med, genetics major with plans to drive a Mercedes and marry some blonde bombshell that would probably have regularly cheated on me to a Spanish/Latin American Studies double-major with intentions to expose corruption in South American governments and bring support, safety, and opportunities to people living in poor South American neighborhoods.
This has been basically all about me and the change it has had on my life. Now for you. All you need is a change of scenery. Try doing things you've never done before. Start talking to kids from a different crowd. Learn to play an instrument. Take a new foreign language. That's probably enough to help you find your calling. If that doesn't work, run off to a poor country for a few months. If seeing thousands of people living in broken down shacks and boxes doesn't help you realize how much you have and give you some sort of purpose, you are beyond any help I can give you.
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yeahh i know how you feel. you love your friends. you love your family. but sometimes they're just not enough. you might kinda feel like you have secrets from them that only you know. stuff like that. i feel like it's weird to keep secrets and things only to yourself. like it just makes me feel alone. maybe you can try changing your life to make it how you think you should be living it. if you want to talk more drop a message in my inbox =)
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I think everyone can relate to feeling alone. Some more than others. I know that I can completely identify with that feeling because I felt like that most of my life. Sometimes it's so unexplainable but sometimes we never really get the answers to why we feel the way we do. I will say, for me, that the feeling has subsided with time. Highschool may have been the main culprit because there is a lot more emotional issues that come along with highschool than people realize.
Your friends and family should be the people who you turn to when you feel this way. When you go away to college or choose to live in a different township or area you learn to adapt to a new lifestyle, new friends, and independence. So in general you need to appreciate your time with them because it goes by a lot faster than you think. And you'll be able to maintain relationships with them as long as you are fully committed. Spending more time with your family and friends will help you realize that they are the people who will always be there for you through everything.
Ask yourself why you feel so lonely. Example: Maybe it's because you some of your friends went out and you weren't included. If you can't think of a reason why you feel this way that's completely normal. As I said before, sometimes we don't have answers for our emotions. My main reason why I feel so lonely was because I was constantly around people. And when I wasn't..even for like a few hours...I was like "Now what? Okay..I'm bored". Life has us surrounded by people so sometimes it's hard to break away from being away from people. And you know what? Alone time is actually a good thing. We need to feel like we are worth it to actually spend time with ourselves. I learned this through a very wise professor. He told me that artists ( that's my major ) need alone time to create amazing pieces. And if we don't devote enough time on our projects it's not because we didn't try hard enough...it's because we are not completely comfortable enough with ourselves to spend a decent amount of time alone.
Try an be comfortable with yourself and know that it's okay to be alone. But don't associate that with feeling lonely. You do have people in your life. And unfortunately, other people aren't so lucky. They don't have relatives, parents, and friends who support them. So consider the people in your life and appreciate that.
We all make mistakes and do things that we aren't proud of. I'm probably like the best model for that! Haha! Maybe you're not doing the things you want to do but eventually you'll be happy you did. All in all, you tried something at least once and it either made you accomplished or made you learn from it. It will add to your experience.
One more thing! You only have one life and you want to fullfill everything you can. Try not to think about what life you could be living, just live the one you have right now and try and make it so that you're happy with it. You can try new things or take up a class. Keep up with your goals but also add some fun and spontaneous things in your life so that you're not completely bored.
Let me know if you need more advice. I hope everything works out for you. I know it's easier said than done!
Love,
Shannon
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I know how you feel, sometimes you just get this feeling of emptiness. kinda like something is missing in your life, but then when you think about it you have great friends, family, and pretty much anything you could want. yet you still feel empty and alone. just try to surround yourself with lots of friends, and try not to be alone too often. it helps. :)
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well i'm really sorry that you feel this way sometimes, it sounds to me as if you are just depressed. and depression can happen for no reason at all. i've been depressed before, so i know what it feels like to feel as if you are doing everything wrong & that nothing is going to go right. i'm not sure what i can tell you that's going to help you feel better. but you need to meet people, talk to others about feeling this way, your guidance couselour is a perfect example.
i wish i could help you out more, but i'm not even sure what i could do.
if you need someone to talk to, feel free to email me anytime at all miss_suzii15@yahoo.com, i always check my email & i'll always reply.
good luck
=)
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