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how to get along with my dad
My dad doesn’t like me…and I know you’ll probably be like he’s your dad he loves you deep down I’m pretty sure he does…but no he doesn’t…..He never says he loves me or will miss me…he’s never given me a hug or anything.. …Like If he ever comes up to me and says I love…I would be weirded out by a lot..and be like umm..okay get a away from me you freak….It’s really awkward being near him…..Like he’s always yelling at me for the most stupid things…and it’s annoying….He’s really annoying….Like for example…every night I take a shower at around 9 and my dad’s like go take a shower and it’s like 8:30…so I’m like no later…it’s to early…he’s like what are you going to do. Wait till 10o clock like everyday…and I’m like WTF!! When do I ever wait till 10 o clock!! And it’s not like he says it every once in a while it’s every effing dayyy!! It’s soo annoying I’m tired of it…and not only that but the littlest things I do….like I cause an accident like accidentally spill my water on the table he’ll be god you need to pay attention..you never pay attetion..and I’m like WTF omg..it was an accident…and my grades aren’t that great rite..but I’m trying my hardest…but my dad’s like good you think everything hard..your not studying all you care about is straightening hair(which I don’t even do everyday), and myspace(which I haven’t gotten on ever since like 7th grade)…and stuff…good I just don’t know what to do..he’s always criticizing me…and it’s not like the good kind where you learn and it helps you..it’s like putting you down criticism…and I don’t want to talk to my mom about it because she’ll just get mad at me for even thinking that. And then she’ll probably go tell my dad..and he’ll deny everything…..Like he used to watch porn(gross I know) and sometimes he’ll forget it’s on history or it’s left on windows media player..and I used to tell my mom..and he would deny it..i’m just like SERIOUSLY!!….are you really going to believe..like it was left on..and he was the only one on the computer....and so ever since then it’s been even more awkward….because I wonder if he ever thinks of me like that….and one thing I especially hate is everyday I close the computer doors so I can do my hmrk….because I hate when it’s open b/c I feel like people are watching me….and every effing day my stupid dad has to come by and hit it open stare at what I’m doing then go to his room….and when I close it he’ll be like why are you closing it…are you on aim, facebook, myspace….and stuff…I tell him it’s because I like it closed…then he starts to yell at me and tells me to leave him open…GOD I don’t know what to do…I don’t want to sit and talk with him…because that’ll be awkward and knowing my dad it’s not like anything will change. He also yells at me for things I didn’t even do…like it’s my sisters fault and tell him it is…he’s like I DON’T CARE..YOU DO IT…and he’ll only believe me if I call my sister and she says it was her…then he’ll go on mumbling about it..and I’m just like OMG shut uppp…pleasee…GODD
All my friends are like I love my dad…and their dad actually cares about themOne time I got so pissed off I ran away…it wasn’t like really running away…i went to the park in my neighborhood…and sat down…my mom was freaking out…and she was a work so she could’nt get in her car and come look for me. My dad was like w/e…and stuff…so an hour passed…two hours…eventually it was 7 and I left at 4…and I was like w/e I’ll walk home cause I was bored…so I start to walk home and I get to the front door..and my dad is JUST getting out of the drive way to look for me…I’m just like wow…you are such an amazing parent..you really care for your kids…and he did’nt come because he was worried…it was because my mom told him to go find me…Yea so that’ my miserable life…I don’t know what to do…I don’t know if it’s me not doing something right or if it’s my dad’s fault..but I just need to know what to do…I can’t take it anymore…
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
well, i know you may not want to talk about it with your dad because it'll be awkward but try sitting down with your whole family and talk about it. make sure that your dad knows how he is acting. he may just be stressed or angry because of something that happened. you need to talk about this and get everything out. tell your mom or family or maybe even a couselor how your frusterated with your dad and how it feels like he doesn't even love you. get your point across and make sure you tell someone who can help you fix it! best of luck.
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Wow that was long. I can tell you must have been venting a little bit huh? Well sweetie I can tell you I know what it's like. I won't go into detail about my effed up life but it's his loss! You probably have heard this a million times in your life but you can't change anyone but yourself! He's going to be that way and you can try approaching it like this...
"Dad I know we don't get along but I want you to see things from my perspective! I want a dad to hug me and care for me. I want to grow up knowing that you were there supporting me. Maybe not only financially but emotionally and out of love. I am your daughter and you are my dad and it would mean so much if we could sit down and talk about things that have been on my mind." Handle it like that somehow. If he doesn't cooperate then he's missing out and atleast you know that you made an effort to have a relationship with him.
feel free to ask anymore questions
<3 labella1400
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The simple truth is: You can't control your dad.
You can't make him like you. You can't change the way he behaves.
The only thing you can change, is YOU.
Your dad might be a total jerk, but you are still making some big mistakes in dealing with him.
1.) Stop sweating the small stuff. So he bugs you about showering? So what! It's annoying sure, but it isn't anything else. Don't fight when you can take a deep breath and say "I will shower before it gets too late. Don't worry." Say it calmly, say it friendly-like and say it each and everytime he makes a comment. Be Zen. Be polite. Be Calm. Showering is not worth waring over.
2.) Take responsibilty for your emotions. NOT HIS.
Him being pouty should not ruin your afternoon. His mumbling should not make you miserable. His unhappiness belongs to him! Let him have it and ignore it. Master YOUR unhappiness. Control it, and find something else to focus on.
3.) Respect him as your parent, even if you hate him. He is allowed to be imperfect and even unfair. He is even allowed to watch porn and lie about it. You still have to listen to him, because he is your parent. Make peace with it. Although you don't like your door open, that is a rule while you live in his house. When you live in your own house you can close any door you'd like. Besides, the more you leave it open, the less likely he is to look. He wont bother you if he thinks you have nothing to hide.
4.) Talk about things with him, but only when you are calm and in control. Plan your approach beforehand and talk about YOUR feelings and YOUR actions, not his. Talk about things you can control and what your plans are, not what you want him to change. Don't attack him. Communicate.
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Ok, I may get a 1 rating for this, but whatever. I do not care. Listen, you sound very immature by the way you act. No wonder your dad is always yelling at you. You have shown no respect for your dad or your mom, by the way you are explaining this. I am pretty sure there is more to the story, and you just left it out, because it may show why you get treated the way you do. If you truly want to stop getting yelled at, then stop doing the things you do to get yelled at for. Also, when a parent tells you to do something, you are not suppose to back talk and expect for them to be like "Ok, honey, do what you want." Yeah right. If you were my child and were acting this way, I'd ground you to your room for life. By the way, anything that you can do on the computer for homework, can be done without it, so you would be grounded from that as well.
If you truly want someone to treat you with respect, you need to follow suit. If you do not like the way your dad treats you, find a way to solve your problem by talking it out with him. There is no advice in the world that is going to make your dad change the way he acts, but the actions you do with him.
P.S. I seriously doubt that your dad thinks of you in a sexual way. You are just way to immature to think anything like that. Has he ever shown you any reason to fear that he would? If not, then maybe you are just looking for attention.
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i think you should remove all the hate you have in your heart for your father and try to show him love...when he scolds you..do not try to fight back but let him know how much it hurts you when yells at you...if you try and do all you can to impress him, i'm sure you'll be able to get along with him...i'm sure he loves you and thats why he cares about your academics..you just have to understand that some people are not very good at expressing their emotions...your dad could be someone like that..i'm sure he loves you..you just need to try you best to show him love and get along with him and you'll be surprised at how he will change drastically
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