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Spitting 6 year old
My six year old son is spitting on people in school. He has had referrals, reprimands, and recess taken away. At home we are punishing him by grounding him and putting him to bed after dinner. He is on the verge of losing a field trip and baseball.
What can I do to make him quit this disgusting habit?
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You might think he is too young for this but if he can write his name he can do this. Have him write sentences. Start with 150. I would word it something like this; I will not spit, it is a dirty habit.
He is grounded until the sentences are complete. Even from baseball. He will sit at the kitchen table and write sentences from the time he gets up, to the time they are done or it's bedtime while stopping only for bathroom and meal breaks. No he won't write the whole time but he will be sitting there. Every time he asks if he can do something or go somewhere the answer is simple, "are your sentences done yet?" When he does finish and you do a spot count ask him to tell you what the sentence was without reading it and when he does tear the sentences up and throw them away.
I have done this with all of my girls from first grade on. It's amazing how quickly they learn to behave when there is no yelling or threatening but lots of writers cramp. He also has to write the whole sentence before he can move to the next and not write the first word all the way down the page, etc.
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I would keep up with the consequences for the spitting at home, so long as they are consistent. I would also suggest sitting down with him, getting his side of story, and trying to piece together just what is going on for him at school, (at least from his perspective.) As for him missing the field trip and baseball game, it's a natural and logical consequence for his behavior, and I would suggest you do nothing to keep it from happening. If you go out of your way to make sure that he does not miss the field trip and baseball game, it would be an act of rescuing. Parents who routinely rescue for their children, run the risk of sending their children the wrong message. The wrong message being; “it's okay for me to display this or these behaviors, because even if I get into trouble, my parents will always bail me out.”
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i used to spit when i was little too, one thing the teacher did when he got fed up with it was give me a small paper cup and set me in the corner, saying that if i like to spit so much i can fill the cup.
it got me kind of tired of spitting pretty fast, especially knowing that if i got caught it was back to the corner.
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There are a lot of different opinions from medical advice to mothers in your position. I went looking up some information for you, but before I post what I found, I would like to share with you what I know about bad habits and how to get them to stop.
First, there is a reason he is doing this. You need to find that reason to better understand why and how to take care of it. I have found with my own daughters, that disciplining them for bad behavior or annoying habits, do not work. Unfortunately. I am not the type of mother that says, "I never discipline my child, because I don't believe in it." Because I do. I believe that I was raised just fine, and I was disciplined. Whether it was a smack on the butt or getting grounded. I was punished for bad behavior. However, when you discipline a child for his/her habits, you are giving them what they want: Attention. Even if it is bad attention, it is still attention, nonetheless. Most children crave their parents attention and will do anything to get that and a reaction out of us.
Here are some of the links that I found to help you. I hope they work. If all else fails, seeing your family doctor about it would be the best way to go.
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[Link](Mouse over link to see full location) (with this one, I am not saying you are a bad parent, but thought the information would be helpful, if nothing else, the links in there could give you more areas to research)
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I know that raising a child can be trying and downright unrewarding at times, but we take the good with the bad and learn from them. I want to remind you that you are not alone in your fight with raising your son. The best thing about being a parent, is the ability to get advice or advise others with help. I want to remind you that your son's behavior is not your fault!! It is something that needs to be addressed, but in no way shape or form should you blame yourself. I hope this helps and you can get the peace of mind that you deserve. If you need anything else, send a message to my inbox and I will help you get through your bad times.
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