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confused..
15/f
well, i've been with my boyfriend for about 11 months. and the thing is, i'm not sure how i feel at the moment. i KNOW i can do better, because he treats me bad at times, and he gets too overly paranoid. he gets paranoid by saying that i can't talk to guys. -___-" and he got mad at me for going to target after school with my friend, which is a girl. because he says that there are probably guys there... but anywho.. i seem to be annoyed with him often also. but yet when something happens that could possibly break us up.. that's when i start getting scared.. but i don't do anything about it. i don't get as scared as i used to.. but i still get scared and nervous. when he used to say "never let me go" i feel touched and stuff, and he said that to me today, i didn't feel anything.. i just changed the subject. So, what's going on? am i losing feelings for him? am i not getting enough sleep or something? or am i just annoyed with him at the moment..?
what should i do? please & thank you!
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so i had the exact same thing happen to me.
ok, you're realizing now that you could do better. GOOD.
you CAN do better. sure, you might have/have had strong feelings for him but now you know he's not what you want/need. i know you might get scared, but that's probably minor seperation anxiety, or you just don't like the change.
i think in the end a break up would be good. jealousy like the type he has takes so much away from you, and that's not what you want. be yourself, and if he doesn't like it, he's not right.
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it really does sound like your falling out of love with him and maybe this isnt such a bad thing either i mean do you really want that controlling of a boyfriend? maybe you should take a break from him and find someone who can possibly treat you better and if you feel like you still do care about him maybe you should talk to him about his issue with trusting you because trust is the basis of a strong relationship
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Alright honey.... he needs to back off and give you some space,..... athat's the only way you are actually going to have a healthy relationship... ok???? Just tell him this: "Listen.... I think that maybe you should trust me enough and believe me that I do really care aboutn you and I wouldn't even look towards another boy if he came by. If you eally do care about me you would trust me... please. What I'm trying to say here is I guess you should give me some space and a breather or I can't go on." If he isn't effected or it turns out the wrong way... you are definitly wayyy too good for him. If he is paranoid he mcares about you so..... saying that should effect him, but if not... he is not worth it... and I know that's hard to except.... but.......... some day you will regret not excepting it.
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I feel like I wrote this question. It matches my relationship with my ex boyfriend at that exact time frame. There's nothing wrong with you, your just starting to realize all the little things he does to you are adding up as if he's controlling. For me, I started seeing signs of my ex being posessive the same way you did. He hated if I talked to guys, he got possesive even if I was with girls, he made me feel like crap when I did stuff without him and he just seemed clingy. He ended up being abusive and controlling nearing our one year when I realized there was something really wrong with him. I'm not saying that's going to happen to you, (this could be completly irrelevant and he's actually just having a bad week and taking it out on you) but I would watch to how he treats you. As for you not saying anything back when he makes romantic comments, that was another thing I started to do when I lost interest in my ex. You might want to step back and look at your relationship and if your the happy person you were when you first started going out with him. If your not happy, you should think over your relationship. I really hope everything works out for you.
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It sounds like you are just comfortable with the relationship. If you are questioning your feelings about him and the relationship then maybe you don't feel that way about him anymore. It doesn't seem that you are in a good relationship if he is mean to you and I know it gets annoying when boyfriend's get jealous but all boys do that. Maybe you should try talking to him about it before you decide anything for certain.
Hope I Helped.
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You probably are losing feelings for him slowly by the way he's been treating you. No one should limit you by telling you cannot do this or that. He sounds insecure maybe it's just him, past relationships, or whatever. But you have been together for nearly a year now.. he should be able to trust you. You could either try talking to him about this.
Why can't you talk to guys anyway? He should know that you are with him and that those guys are just friends. You really need communication and trust in a relationship. You don't want someone to control your every move. You should try talking to him before doing anything and if he doesn't make any effort.. then you shouldn't stay in a relationship like that.
Since it's been nearly a year of being together.. you have grown attached to him so which is why it scares you when you think about breaking up. I've stayed in a relationship for almost 2 years and it was horrible. because when you or him do end it, you won't have many friends sticking around to help you go through it.. due to the constant "don't do this, don't hang out with them, don't talk to him, blah blah!"
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