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humorist-workshop
Suicide.
I am 15/male.
Its pretty much exactley what it sounds like. Im sick of disapointing my parents. I fail school. I dress so awkwardley that there embarresed to be seen with me. Im a complete total fuck up. I have anger issues. Im always fighting with my mom. I told her i didnt want to be a part of the family, and the look on her face KILLED me inside. They found out i smoke, and my mom didnt do anything except cry. becuase her mom died at like 30 from cancer. Im always getting in trouble with them. Oh and i like men. and i cant tell them that becuase i cant and i wont deissapoint them more. Im sad to say that the easiest way to get through this, is to kill myself. Im not really looking for advice. Im kind of just venting to anyone who cares. :(
Sincerley,
Me.
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you can't help who you are and if you kill yourself it doesn't seem like you're being true to you. I do understand how you feel....i've been abused by my mother for 7 years the catch is i have a brother and sister who never get in trouble hit or lectured. now as for being a disappointment i don't think its as it seems, i think maybe your parents just aren't sure how to help you. i think maybe going to family counceling might help you talk to your parnets about your feelings. i tmight also help them understand you a bit better!!! hope it works out
luv yas
~ashley~
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Do you realize that killing youself, would just give your parents MORE pain than it would to tell them that you were gay. I mean come on, there're you parents, they will love you no matter what. It would kill THEM to know that you killed yourself. Also, never take the easy way out, it gets you NOWHERE!Plus, i'm positive there are plenty of other people that care about you other than just your parents. So, you would just be causeing them pain too. I'm really sorry you feel this way, if you need some advice just ask me a question ANY time. Hope i helped. Don't forget to rate.
-Alex :]
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Please know that there are people who care about you, people who would miss you if you were gone. I think you should read this, it helped me when I felt like it was the only way out.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
I'm sure your parents want you to be successful, and I believe you that they may be disapointed sometimes, but they still love you. I've felt exactly like you did, like I couldn't get anything right, like I didnt have a handle on my own life.
I think you should give more thought to coming out to your parents, I don't know them, so I cannot say how they would react, but if you feel they would be disappointed but still accept you, then tell them. They may not approve, but remind them that you are still the same person, still their son.
You said it yourself, "the easiest way to get through this, is to kill myself" well don't take the easy way out. Life is something worth fighting for, don't ever forget that.
I care and I am willing to talk to you online if you would like. I'll listen to you and try to help you out. Either drop a question in my inbox or instant message me on aim. My screen name is wishes count.
Kate <3
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ok look i know i dont know you and you dont really know me so just take my advice and PLEASE dont kill yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!no body is a complete screw up unless they absolutely give up on life. dont worry everbody fights with their mom. i know i do...well what did you expect her to do??? look at you and be like,"oh baby it's totally ok if you smoke." uh..no any mother would cry if she found out her 15 yrold son was smoking. and the fact that her mother died from cancer probably eats at her because she feels the same might happen to you. its so totally ok to be gay...i mean if you told them now while everything is going wrong, it might make things worse. so if i were you i would wait to tell them that later after everything has simered down a bit.and for the anger issues, try going to therapy or group counseling for anger management. well i know you didnt want advice in the first place but oh well...i gave it to you anyways. hopethis helps and maybe in the end everything will workout fine!
<3lilmzhotstuff<3
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You know, offering you an older perspective might help.
I went through my bad times as well. Looking back, I thought about it. I thought that it was the best way out for all involved.
But I can tell you a few things.
Suicide won't solve any problems for anyone. Your parents might be occasionally dissapointed in you. It happens. My parents were with me, we actually don't speak much anymore. But I know my parents and yours would be incredibly more devastated by one of us dying than by the discord. In time, you can and will grow closer to your parents. Rifts heal. So do old wounds and words.
If you're gay you're gay. Its who you are. You cant hate yourself for being who you are, when who you are doesnt make you a bad person. And I know its hard to look at yourself and say that you are a good person with potential, but there is that in everyone.
Maybe consider listening to them a bit more. Trying to do things their way a bit more. If what you are doing isnt working, try something new.
Suicide isnt going to get you through anything. Its just going to end things. I can tell you from experience that when you are older, you won't ever look back and say "Man, when I was 15 I should have killed myself then". Rather, you will look back and think "Im glad I got through that period in my life, because there were so many things waiting for me to stop bathing in my own misery"
You are self aware. You are not unintelligent. You have to decide that you want to make something of yourself, and then don't ever fucking stop working for it. Ever.
Because when you reach that point, where you look in the mirror and you like what you see, even with all the flaws inherent in yourself, its an amazing feeling.
Took me more than 20 years of living to do it. But when I reached the point where I saw that in myself, everything I have ever been through... the pain, the uncertainty, the fears, it was all worth it.
Because from this point on, I have a life, and I have a future, and I'm looking forwards to it.
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i care!...let me start by sayin that being alive is a GIFT, an that you are so lucky to have parents good or bad..you are lucky to have clothes..in fashion or out!..there are children and even grown ups who have gone through life without that love or support...!..also, nothing and NOTHING in this world is worth dieing for...you are a strong person if you have held out in this situation this longg!!..you seem like a strong indiviudla and even though it seems shit and fuked up now itll get better trust..me! i hav had big problems in my family and its broken up andits gotten togtheva and people that i love and cherish passed and it hurts so much and eve though i dont know you! knowing that someone wants to commit sucide hurts alot!! you hav all your life in front of you and you can be who you want without any judgements...if you want to talk more you can send me an email or here or gimme me feedback and ill be more then happy to help!! tc n please think twice!..trust me someboy out there loves you! you just dont know it yet! tc x x mwah
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it sounds like youre going through some tough times. its hard when you feel like a failure, and feel like you are letting everyone else down that's around you. in terms of school, if you are trying to do good but aren't succeeding, you cant feel bad about yourself for that, and youre family shouldnt either. if you arent trying, then you need to make an effort if you honestly care what they think, and how they feel. how you dress shouldnt matter to them. youre allowed to have your own personal style. everyone likes to dress different ways. its okay to have anger issues. you have things to be angry about. thats fine. if you want email me aidenisfire@yahoo
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dont commit suicide it is the worst way to go tell a school counselor and have a little intervention you can really hurt some one by commiting suicide i know how you feel and even if you do like men your parents should just except you for who you are if you need more help talk to me or a trusted adult dont go to hard way and kill yourself it is a valueable thing, life dont waste it you are loved by someone somewhere dont worry you can get threw this you are not alone i am here for you 100% dont KILL your self please you are a strong person and can get threw this
good luck
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***EDIT*** Hey, man, I'm glad I could help. Knowing that I did means more to me than any rating you could ever give. :)
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Well, I care. I'll start at the top and work my way down:
The first step in changing all of this is the fact that you realize you are doing something wrong.
Your grades are bad- try harder to excel. You deserve that education. It is your right to get it.
If you like to dress awkwardly, well, do so when you aren't going to be out and about with your parents. Dress in appropriate attire when you plan to do things with them, or if they plan to have guests over.
The best thing you can do for your mom right now is give her a sincere apology, a hug, a kiss, and explain to her you were just angry, you didn't mean what you said, you never meant to break her heart- you were angry and hurting and reflected that onto her.
I know that you would mean it when you say that, because I can tell you feel like a grade-A heel about it from what you say above.
Try to stop smoking. I smoke, I have since I was a teenager, and the longer you smoke, the harder it is to quit.
Try to get help from a therapist about your anger issues. If you talk to your mom, I'm sure she will understand that you need help with that.
Try to avoid getting into trouble with your parents. It certainly wouldn't hurt to sit them down and discuss with them what you can do to improve your behavior.
I know some parents are touchy about their kids being gay, but if you are truly gay, you need to say so when you sit down to talk with them. They need to know so you no longer feel you have something like that to hide, and they will just have to like it or not.
When it comes down to the whole idea of suicide- BAD IDEA. Think of the look on your mother's face when you told her you didn't want to be a part of the family. Now, imagine how much worse that look will be if you were to commit suicide.
All of your problems are solvable- you just have to STRIVE to find the solution. Committing suicide is a selfish act. NOTHING you can say or do or BE would be more heart breaking than that.
Your mom would rather see you get bad grades, dress awkwardly, smoke, and marry a man ANY DAY over losing her son.
Nothing is THAT bad that your life is no longer worth living. NOTHING.
Talk to your parents and tell them what is going on inside your head. They probably feel so helpless right now, because they know you are having some problem that they can't help you with because you shut them out.
ygs-29/f
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