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My boyfriend is mean.
Im dating this boy whom I really like a lot.
But he is always really mean to me, and we fight all the time. He is always trying to make me have phone sex with him and he considers it "making up" he tells me all the time "lets fight so we can make up" and when I say no, he gets mad and starts saying I dont care about him and im selfish and I dont care about nobody but myself. He always has a way to turn things around and make me look like the bad person and feel really bad for something.
he calls me fat all the time and I only weigh 105 lbs and im 5'5. He calls me ugly all the time and then he says he is just playing. But sometimes he can be the sweetest guy in the world.
He is 16 and a preacher, so maybe he takes out his stress on me, or maybe its because he is black and im white?
Today him and I got into a fight and he told me
"If you were hangin off a cliff with lions and snakes under you, I wouldn't pull you up I would stomp you down"
I dont know what to do anymore.
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Well, here's the deal. Your boyfriend is very insecure. For some reason, he doesn't feel very good about himself, and somewhere in his mind he thinks that he's not good enough for you. And his biggest fear is that you're going to one day realize that and think, "What am I doing with this guy? I could get someone better!".
Basically, he's afraid of losing you. He's afraid of you leaving him because you think you're better than him, or deserve someone better.
So what does he do? He does whatever he can to make sure you never feel superior to him. He tries to convince you that you're fat, ugly, selfish, etc., so you'll think that no other guy would ever want you. He wants you to think that you're lucky to have him... that he's the only guy who would ever love someone as horrible as you are. That's his way of making sure you never leave him.
Unfortunately, what he's doing is having the opposite effect! He's actually making his worst fear come true... he's driving you away. And it's kind of sad, because when you DO leave, he'll be convinced it's because of whatever it is he doesn't like about himself. When in reality, it's because of the way he's treating you.
But sad as it is, you really should put this guy behind you and move on. Because things will only get worse, not better. Guys like this don't usually change... and the verbal and mental abuse often becomes physical as time goes on.
As hard as it might be, do yourself a favor and put this guy behind you. Find someone who is confident and secure enough to treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
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You know exactly what to do. You dump him and never speak to him agian.
You might not want to do it. You may even be afriad (I would be, the way this little thug carries on) but you know that is what you need to do.
You might have heard that you should always dump someone in person. That rule DOESN'T apply when your partner is theatening physical harm and frightening you. If anyone ever threatens you, you dump them over the phone, with an adult in the room as a witness.
You should NEVER be bullied and threatened for sex. You should NEVER be insulted openly and cruelly. You should NEVER be physically threatened. Those are not the actions of love. Those are the actions of vicious, controling little, monsters.
Get rid of him. Leave no doubt in his mind. Record the conversation if you can. If he threatens you, tell your school and the police.
He can't do that. He shouldn't be allowed to do that. Protect yourself.
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Ok, this kid is not a good boyfriend and you seem like a nice girl. You can do better. The way you talked to him was in a mature manner and her responded with immaturity and rudeness. you threatened to leave him and now you need to. He is a cruel person and he is stomping on your self esteem to boost his and that is NEVER ok. him being stressed is not reason for him to talk to and treat you like that. You need to leave him before he gets worse.
He is acting like someone who could potentially be abusive and you definately do not want to be a part of a relationship like that. You need to end it now before it escalates.
It sounds like you do care about him so it probably won't be easy but trust me you don't need someone who treats you like that. You deserve better.
Good luck and i hope that i was able to help you.
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Hey, my name is Em231 and I think I can help he
is being realy disrespectful to you and thats not good I think you should end the realationship and
find a nice guy who likes you and don'tcall you
those mean names ! Every thing you said in that text
is so right (you didn't need any advice you
got it coverd)!!!
I hope I helped
Em231
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That right there ^^ is not a good boyfriend at ALL! You were right to tell him thats it wouldn't work, if he acts like that. But, you shouldn't handle this on your own. I mean "don't ever threaten me---and your gonna leave is a 'no no'". That doesn't sound to well safe. I mean I would take it seriously. Just tell an adult about that. On top of that, you said he was a preist. Heck, that is not a way someone that religious should act. And priests, i know for a fact that they don't channel their anger to another person. well at least a good one. So he obviously does NOT respect you. Your doing everything right, and desetve such a better boyfriend. So, like i said, please don't handle this on your own. Bring someone who is acctually in your presence, into this. Not someone who can't do anything (such as me over the internet). Hope i helped. good luck, don't forget to rate!!
-alex :]
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seriously any guy that insults you is not worth it, at all!!!
Do not be forced into things in which you dont feel comfortable with, this boy sounds like a bully! Id advise you to get out of the relationship
xx
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Look, all you can do it talk to him. The way he is acting and talking to you is NO way a boyfriend should. He should make you feel special. Not put you down all the time.
He can either change his selfish, rude ways, or you break up with him. Let him know this. Give him an ultimatum.
Read your question back to yourself. Why are you putting up with that?
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