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I don't know if I should tell her
My best friend and her boyfriend have been going out for 11 months. I know he means everything to her and she genuinely loves him.
Well, I heard today from a friend that he has cheated on her twice, once relatively soon after they'd been going out and once about a month ago. The thing is, this friend heard it from another friend, who in turn heard it from a friend of the boyfriend. I don't know what the likeliness of it being true is, to be honest - although I've never really liked him and it does seem to fit his character.
This would ruin my friend if it was true. I was wondering whether I should tell her or not - if I told her and it wasn't true, she'd probably hate me forever as it would mess up her relationship and really upset her in the mean time. But if I don't tell her, and it is true - isn't that worse?! I really have no idea what to do, I don't want to lose my friend but I don't want her to get hurt either.
xxxx
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being cheated on is terrible, so if it were me i would want to know. i look out for my friends..so i would tell them if i heard anything. if you decide to tell her i would make sure you tell her you heard it from a friend who heard it from someone else,etc. and maybe your friend and the original source can talk and he/she can tell her more detail maybe or even help her get proof by recording her bf talking about it? i dont know, just an idea. but if a friend of mine heard something, told me, and it wound up not being true, i would not hate her for it. i would be happy that she was looking out for me. the only reason why i would be upset is if my friend made up the rumor but thats not the case here. good luck with everything
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Well, I'm sitting here thinking, if my boyfriend was cheating on me, I'd want someone to tell me! So it's gonna sound kinda wimpy when I tell you... even if you find out for certain that it's true, I don't think you should tell her. And here's why:
If you tell her, she's going to confront her boyfriend about it. And what if he denies it? Which he very well might. If she's that in love with him, she's gonna want to believe him. She's gonna really, REALLY want to believe him... which can only mean NOT believing you. And even if deep down she knows it's true, on some level she's going to resent you for telling her. She might even come up with some crazy ideas about why you'd tell her that... maybe that you're just jealous, or trying to break them up? People in these situations can come up with all kinds of nutty ideas to avoid being hurt by the truth. So even though you're trying to be a true friend, your friendship could suffer.
I think you should let her find out on her own, or from another source. And if this guy is really a cheater, she's going to find out eventually. And when she does, she's going to need you... and then you can be there for her and be the true friend that you are.
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hey (: maybe before you are ready to tell her, i think youu should find out a little bit more of what happened and find out teh whole story, and talk to your best friend's boyfriend, and is he admitts it, then yes, go ahead and deffinetely tell your best friend, you wouldnt want her getting hurt even more. find out more information and then decide if its the right time to tell her.<br>
hope i helped (:
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dont tell her if your not absolutely sure. surely you know how teenagers are, if not your in the wrong time zone... they feed off gossip! its like the telephone game we used to play in preschool where the teacher tells a student something in their ear and they whisper it to each other going down the row and the person at the end says it and it comes out completely different. yeah well its like that so just be sure before you tell her cuz it could be devestating to you and her...hope i helped
xoxoxo
teardrops7
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i dont think you should tell her, your not positive about what happened, and it would ruin your friends relationship, if you told her and it wasnt even true, i think you should wait untill you get a little bit more info on what happend
hope i helped =]
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