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Help!
Ok this is going to be kind of long because I'm going to sort of rant. But anyway all my life I've gone to a Catholic School and my family is like really religous and filled with good wholesome morals. I was raised and taught to be the same my whole life and up until now I haven't hesistated at all to play the "good girl".
But lately, I don't know what happened to me. I've taken a complete 180 degree turn and I'm sort of ashamed at who I've become. I'm sixteen and about to go in my senior year of high school. I've been drinking like a LOT and partying. I've been sneaking out, lying to my parents and everyone around me. I never go where I tell my parents I go, and usually end up driving out of town in the middle of the night (which I'm not allowed to do AT all) and sleeping at my boyfriends house, and with people I really don't even know. Now I started smoking cigarettes and been smoking those a LOT. (about 7-8 a day) and now I'm also starting to smoke like weed too. To top it off, my parents are HUGE on abstinence and I just set up an appoinment at a clinic to go on birth control.
It seems like I'm losing who I was, and I'm not strong enough to stay the way I was.
Too be honest, I'm really scared. I mean I love doing what I do, but at the same time I'm scared of how much I changed and the kind of person I'm becoming. I'm doing things that I always used to be against, and if my parents ever found out they'd literally disown me. Also, my religion prohibits all these activites and I'm also scared of how quickly my religous and moral being are deteroriating.
I don't really know what advice I'm asking, but am I like a "bad kid"? I do keep my grades really high in school and plan on attending a high rate college, but I feel like thats not enough. Basically, I'm just really scared. So any help would be appreciated I guess...
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the first answered is dumb- "it's okay to party & smoke weed"? are you serious?
anyway, i would simply ease into stopping it all. if it makes you feel as guilty as it seems, you KNOW you're not doing the right thing and your letting your parents down, then you might as well stop it all. you will feel so much better about yourself when you do, and you'll have a clear conscious. you could still go out and have fun, but without the bad influences of weed or cigs or alcohol.
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okay wow! well im arielle and yeah i party aLOT too. but im in 8th grade. your a senior so honestly i think its deff okay for you to party. its your last year as a kid so you should enjoy it and forget everything and just have fun. now if you dont feel good about what you do then i just advice you to tone it down a little. yeah smokeing weed is straght. but cigs=baddd. theres no ponit of them, there gay. anyway before you have sex with your bf make sure your ready. dotn get cought up in all these partying and forget your morals. your parents raised you to make good decitions so dont do anything you think youll regret when your older. and you might want to chill and your sneaking out cuz your parent might be catching on so you need to gain there trust. keep up your grades.yeah i think its fine if you tell your parents that your sleeping at your friends house cuz i do that all the time and they never find out! just be careful and dont do anything youll regret.
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You are definatly not a bad person! You're just probably lost and confused...somewhere along the line you forgot who you really are and what your morals and beliefs are. Maybe this is all due to peer pressure or something that you started acting this way...or there was something in your life that was bothering you that you wanted to change. Whatever it is, the first step would be to remember who you were and what you believe in. Once you know that, than you need to decide wheather you want to go back to being how you were or stay how you are or just start acting a little bit better...but I think the best thing to do, that will relieve the guilt that you're feeling, is to tell your parents...now I know this will be really hard and you probably think I'm crazy for even suggesting that..lol..but I believe that it will make you feel better and feel like a better person. So if you want, you can ask your parents if you can talk to them about something really important and I'm sure that they'll set apart a time for you to talk. Than just start telling them slowly and hope they understand and you could appologize...I hope this works!!! Good Luck!!!:D!!!
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whatever advice i give you, you can either take it, or leave it...use your best judgement.
first of all, and foremost..you are not a bad person.
second of all...i'm not going to tell you how to run your life, because you know who you are, and you are a good person, just so confused in your faith.
don't be afraid or ashamed for partying and drinking, accept it, and forgive yourself. it's okay that you drink, sure, it's your life, sure, probably because there is so much pressure from your parents to do good, but then again it might not be.
but because your said that your parents would literally disown you, i sense that they don't know. they puty too much on you, and all you should do is step back away from everything, even school, and don't catogorize yourself as either a bad or good person. everyone is good.
you just need to pray. sounds simple, but it's harder. don't do all these prayers like the "our father" or whatever, say something to God, and mean it. talk to Him, and really just let Him take all your worries. He really listens. and when you ask for him to help you, he will, although you may not realizre it. He speaks through your coinscience, people, things, and nature.
trust me on this, but if you just relax, pray and you'll get though this.
you may be thinking, rite, what would i know, but seriously, i used to be such a nut case, and full of anger until i could just explode, and i prayed and prayed, and i got angrier because of pressure, untile i did explode. but someone was there for me.
is there someone there for you?
i know you are scared of life. so what if you smoke weed, sneak out, drink, and party? don't think about your parents this time when i say this...but think about yourself.think about what has those things have done to you. coming to an advice site becasue you don't know what else to do.
if you do let God have your worries, and i mean really let him have it, you'll be in total peace, and you'll be happy. you just need to choose to be happy. happiness is a choice. so is hatred.
"FEAR prevents love; LOVE prevents fear"
crying help it too, just in confusion or total anger, don't get angered and hot headed with your parents, stay in your room, lock the door, go on your bed, and lay down, close your eyes, relax, and cry. it'll make you think of horrioble things but it opens you up, and makes you feel so vunerable. in that state, talk to God. because your open.
i hope you do take my advice, i really do. you can go places, if you are willing to take that first step. you'll get through this. but it's your desicion. and it won't be easy.
no one is asking you to be perfect or "ms. Goody two shoes" just be.
-greenty
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Okay, what probably happened was that you felt that you didn't have any control in your life.
You just did what you were told, and what you were expected to to, instead of what you really wanted to do.
Now, weed won't kill you.
I don't care if you smoke weed.
But don't get caught, don't drive...make sure you don't have to do anything if you're gonna smoke weed.
But you should get your drinking, smoking (cigarettes), and lying under control.
Now, as for sex, I suggest condoms.
Birth control is not good for your body, and doesn't protect you from STDs.
But have the guy wear two rubbers.
In case one pops.
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