|
i'm stuck
Okay well, all my life I felt like I have grown up all by myself. My parents weren't really there for me. I am the oldest out of four kids, and my parents would always leave us at my grandma's house when we were young. And when I started school they started leaving us at home alone. My parents would always be too tired, so they would never help me with my homework. I felt that I had to grow up and become someone important just so they can pay attention. So I would try so hard at school. I would get straight A's, get awards, and other stuff. But they simply didnt' show that they cared. They just always said "good job" and that's it. As I got older they kept pressuring me to become a lawyer at age 9. I felt so pressured. And now at age 15, I want to tell them that I don't want to be a lawyer. And that I don't want to stay in Anaheim or California. I really want to tell them, but they have so many expectations for me. I mean, they REALLY want me to be a lawyer and stay with them forever. I don't know how to tell them because my mom has panic attacks. And well, my dad can has had strokes in the past. I don't know how to break the news to them without them dying. What should I do? Am I a bad daughter for telling them that I don't want to be what they want me to be? Help, please.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
thats so great of you,your pretty strong to be able to study even though they werent there for you,you are truely mature and open minded.Anywayz,i think you should work what you want,you cant possibley work all by yourslef so hard to reach your dreams and then have someone come and change your dreams for you!But they are your parents,you have to tell them verrrry nicely and delicatley so nothing bad woud happen to them...start off with your mom...tell her mom...what do you think if i were to work a *whatever you wana be* instead?i always wanted to,its one of my dreams actually....let her say her opinion and listen to it without arguing too much because of her condition....if it works with her then congratulations...if not..then just leave her alone and try with your dad....hes probably stronger and can hear you out more....good luck
]
Um, No.
You go and do what it is YOU want to do. It is your life to lead.
This is a case of parents wanting to live vicariously through their daughter, and the only thing they are doing for her is making tough life decisions seem overwhelming.
You are just going to have to tell them that NO, you don't want to be a lawyer, and THIS school is where you want to attend.
They will have no choice but to accept that fact. Once you get out of high school, you are 18- a legal adult who can make their own decisions.
So many kids let their parents bully them into following the parent's dreams and not their own. Some say "Well we won't pay for your college if you go there and do this." Bullshit. Get a job, student loan, or pell grant.
ygs-29/f
]
If you know instead what it is that you want to do, it would be a good idea to do some research into the options. That way, when you do say something to your parents, you can tell them that although you don't want to be a lawyer, this is the career that you would rather have and then present them with any information you have gathered together. I agree with the advice on waiting until there is a low level of stress before approaching them with your ideas. You are in no way a bad daughter for wanting to live your own life and they should be proud of you for being an individual. You may have to give them a little time to come to terms with not getting their own way though. Good luck.
]
you just have to sit them down and tell them that where you are isn't really where you want to be when you get older. make sure you're calm and it's at a time when the don't have a ton of stress. they should understand, and you're young, so they may not take you seriously, but tell them it's something you've been thinking about a lot and staying where you are isn't what you want. they should be able to respect your decision.
you're not at all a bad daughter for wanting to follow your own dream as oppsed to theirs. you're you, they're them, you think differently and want different things.
good luck.
]
That must be really hard. I can see why you're so worried about breaking the news to your parents though. I don't think your a bad daughter. You just have your own goals and your own dream. your parents might want something diffrent for you but it is your life.You should live it the way you want to. I think mabye you should slowly start droppin hints about how our not happy with the idea of becoming a lawyer, instaed of saying it all at once. That way it won't be a huge shock to them when you finally tell them the truth. I hope this helps ^^ Good Luck!
]
More Questions: |