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He makes ME feel guilty.
My boyfriend is significantly older then I am.
:] Well let me start by saying that I do have a great relationship with my boyfriend. He's my best friend and he makes me extremely happy most of the time.
The problem is he makes me feel so bad. He says that I don't let him see his friends enough. Whenever we rarely hang out on weekdays, and yes, we do hang out on weekends only because we're both so busy any other time. =[
So, tonight he came over because I cooked my family dinner and everything was going well. Until he got a call from his roommate who said they were going to have a party. The guy who was going to be there always has weed & stuff and the only time my boyfriend ever gets high is when he's there.
That's when I went into a serious girlfriend mode and started telling him he couldn't do it, otherwise I'd be mad. Then he started complaining about how I always make him feel guilty & never let him hang out with friends.
What can I do to make this whole situation better? But, still be with him at the same time?
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You could always go to the party with him...Im not nessarily big on drugs but it seems like he has a lot of freedom since you guys only see each other on weekends so i really dont see why he has to complain...I think you should be the upset that he is leaving you when its your one time to hang out a week...he hang out with his other friends all week long he needs to set time to hang out with you
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hey i think that you should let him do waht he wants and chill with his friends so that you dont make yourself look so clingy and nagging all the time because guys dont like that. and if you keep doing this he will probably break up with you.
and letme tell you something, guys are just like girls, they talk abuot us girls and their relationships etc. and if one of his friends doesnt like that you arent letting him do something he wants to do .. his friend WILL be able to convince him to get rid of you... and all hell have to say is friends come first or like they say it.. "bros b4 hos"..
i hope i helped =]
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HI,
Well I don't think your unreasonable or in the wrong for not wanting your boyfriend to smoke weed and get high!!! And to be 100% truthful I couldn't be in a relationship with someone who did that.
Relationships are all about balance, its important you want to spend time with your boyfriend / girlfriend and that you are like you say 'best friends' or a least 'good friends' but people also need space or they feel trapped and suffocated and when people stat to feel like that they run a mile in the opposite direction.
You need an honest conversation with your boyfriend and an honest conversation with your self. Calmly explain to him how you feel and listed as he does the same. Compromise and mutual understanding is what is needed. Ultimately if your boyfriend can't cope with that or can't understand, to quote a good friend of mine: 'no matter who much you love and care for some one if its not going anywhere and its not going to work you get out and move on!' hopefully this won't be the case with you and your boyfriend and you will be able to sort it out but you need to have that conversation ASAP. And if I where you I would say the smoking weed stops because I do not want to be with some one who does that and associates with people like that!!
Good luck and let me know how it all goes
Chan.
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You can't really control him. It will anger him. He feels bad because you're giving him a guilt trip. Just talk to him about getting high and how you dislike it.
You should let him hang out with his friends.
the more you tell him no, he's going to want to do it more and he's going to get mad at you for holding him back. Just tell him you don't agree with his decision. You should let him see his friends and that you'll always be by his side.
Unless you absolutely can't be with someone who does weed.
But I wouldn't go far as to "it has to be ME or weed"
because if you are both angry, the wrong things might be said.
You can try working things out.
Like you can only do weed like 2 times a month because you don't like him doing things like that and how it bothers you.
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talk to him about it, and tell him how it makes you fell, but don`t force him to stay by your side. the simplest thing to do is just go along with him to keep an eye on him.
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Guys are like little kids, when you tell them no, it makes them want to do it more.
My advice would be to just let him do his thing but talk to him about it, tell him why you don't like that he gets high etc. and that when he tells you your making him feel bad, it makes you feel bad.
He probably doesn't realize he's doing it, he just wants to hang with the boys.
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